I’m going to come so hard the entire state is going to know.

He shut me up with a dirty kiss full of tongue and stubble. He didn’t, I realized, want this connection we had diluted by words. We’d never needed words. Our relationship thrived, even when I’d given him no words at all.

This was really happening. I was having sex with Knight.

Knight Jameson Cole: Quarterback. Prom King. The best looking jackass in town.

But also, Knight Jameson Cole: Closeted alcoholic. Adopted son. Gentle soul. And the most pure-hearted man I’d ever known.

I started panting hard, burying my fingernails in the muscles of his shoulders. I knew I was going to scream, and there was no way to stop it. The orgasm was just too much. Too strong. Too full of emotions.

“Come for me, Moonshine. Come all over my cock.”

I exploded, shattering between his arms, seeing stars in different colors and sizes and shapes, at the exact same time he jerked into me one last time, emptying inside me. My cry pierced the air surrounding the water tower.

After that, we just lay there, him still on top of me, slowly softening inside of me. We breathed each other, the scent of sex intoxicating both of us into heavy-lidded smirks.

“Thank you,” he whispered, kissing the tip of my nose, looking skittish all of a sudden—almost endearing. “For a perfect first time.”

I smiled sadly. “You don’t have to pretend, Knight. I appreciate you sparing my feelings, but I saw you with Poppy. I understand.”

“No, you don’t,” he said flatly.

My eyebrows shot up in surprise. “But I saw… I came to the treehouse and…”

“Figured as much. I couldn’t go through with it.” He pulled out of me slowly, rolling away from me and gathering me in his arms. The chill began to pool around us, like a blanket, frosting our bodies. We shivered against one another. “I couldn’t let both of us waste our first time.”

“But how do you know mine was a waste?” I asked honestly.

Knight chewed on his tongue piercing, looking elsewhere. I realized it still hurt him. That it always would.

“The morning after I snuck into your room, I saw the letter you wrote to FUCKING JOSH. I didn’t open it. Just held it toward the sun so I could read whatever I could get from it. You said you loved him. After I left, I spent all this time dissecting what you said, and I realized you never told him you’re in love with him. You choose words so carefully and intelligently, Luna. I knew this wasn’t a mistake. You understand the meaning of words. That’s why you don’t use them lightly. That meant I still had a chance. And I figured, I’m losing my mom. I’m not ready to lose my best friend, too. I’m not going down without a fight, Luna. I’ll take whatever you’re willing to give me. If it’s friendship—so be it.”

“I don’t want to be your friend anymore,” I said, pulling away to catch his gaze.

His face hardened, his lips thinning in pain. Only this time, the invincible mask didn’t harden around his face, like clay. I could see the full range of his emotions. Hurt. Terror. Anger. Annoyance.

My beautiful best friend. From whom I kept a secret. A secret about his mother.

You’re going to hell for this, Luna.

“I see.” He frowned, trying not to sulk. “That’s cool.”

But it wasn’t cool. We were never just cool. When we were together—we were blazing hot.

“I want to be your girlfriend.”

I’d never been a rebel.

Not much of a rule-breaker, either. On my best days, probably a daredevil tomboy who abided by the rules, but tiptoed around the red line of propriety.

But the combination of wanting to stick it to April, who was still in shock from the fact I could speak, and not wanting to part ways with Knight made me sneak him into my room, even though I knew it could land me into hot water. Maybe even get me kicked out of the dorm.

“Why not my hotel room?” Knight inquired on our way to my dorm.

“Because I’m done being a pushover.”

And because my room was way closer.

“Who pushed you over? I’ll maim them.”

“My roommate, April. But that one’s on me, Knight. I’m the one who’s going to deal with this.”

“Technically,” Knight murmured, his erection pressed against my ass as he rained drugging kisses all over my neck and shoulders once we’d made our way to my hallway. “The old man in the lobby told me he’d call the police if I stayed the night. But, also technically…” Knight slid his hand into the back of my panties and curled his hand around my ass, dipping a finger between my folds. “You’re damn good jailbait.”

Swallowing a fit of giggles, I unlocked the door and tiptoed inside the room. I was expecting—hoping, really—that April had opted to sleep at Ryan’s, seeing as we’d fought without properly making up. It would be perfect if she walked in the next morning and found out all the space she took in our little closet—none of it for me, my clothes were still in suitcases—was now equally divided between us. And that Knight was sound asleep beside me, just like Ryan was beside her almost every night.

My hopes were crushed when I noticed her silhouette under her covers, her back to us, her even breath telling me she was asleep. Alone.