Reckless

Two weeks into the promo tour, we flew back to L.A so the guys could shoot the "Regretfully" music video with Sienna. There was a feeling of melancholy in the air when Kellan and I returned to our room at the record label's house. And it wasn't just because we were dead tired. We'd been so busy promoting the album that the video had happily slipped our minds, but now it was all we could think about. Neither one of us was excited about it. Kellan had to pretend to make love to another woman. And I had to watch it, so that my mind didn't blow it up into some crazed, passionate porno. I'd always heard that filming love scenes was antiseptic and clinical. I hoped that was true.



On the morning of the shoot, I tried to alleviate the tension by waking up before Kellan and surprising him with a heart-pounding lovemaking session, but the reason behind the attack was all too obvious for both of us, and the intimate moment was laced with a fine layer of desperation.



Kellan was quiet on the ride to the studios. The rest of the guys were a bundle of energy and ceaselessly chatted about how excited they were to have an official video being produced. I was torn on the matter, both excited and full of dread.



The limo that Sienna had arranged for us took us right into a movie studio lot. Huge, long rectangular buildings were stretched as far as the eye could see. Each building had a number on it, and as the driver slowly made his way through the maze, I couldn't help but wonder what masterpieces were being filmed all around me. Just the thought plastered a huge grin on my face that made Kellan chuckle. That made my smile even wider; being amused by me was far better than being sullen.



We stopped at a building labeled B7. The driver let us out and pointed over to where we should go. It was unnecessary, since Sienna was standing in the doorway, waving at us with a glowing smile that could probably light up a small city. Dressed in a white tank top and skinny jeans that must have been molded onto her body they were so tight, Sienna looked flawless. Did she come in looking like that, or had she already been to hair and makeup?



Her long black locks sparkled in the sunshine as she approached us. Tossing her arms around Kellan, she kissed each one of his cheeks in greeting. "So good to see you all again," she cooed.



Holding his hand out for me, Kellan gave her a polite nod. Not at all bothered that Kellan and I were physically connected, Sienna looped her arm around his elbow and pulled him into the building. People in headphones were everywhere. There was so much activity that I instantly felt out of place just by standing still. I felt like I should be doing something, I just had no idea what it was.



As the boys gawked at the production before them, Sienna started showing us around. There were multiple sets inside the studio building, but we'd only be using a few of them. Really, we'd mostly be using two. There was a set that was dressed up like a stage. That one filled me with warmth and comfort-there were few things on this earth more natural than Kellan on a stage. The stage set would be used for filming the band all together. Their scenes would be small snippets that would be tucked around the heart of the video. And the heart of the video centered around set number two-a wide room with a huge bed as the main focal point. Seeing that set made my stomach churn in unpleasant ways.



Giving me a concerned glance, Kellan squeezed my hand harder. As Sienna sat on the bed, giggling in a coquettish way, I began to be filled with doubt that I could watch this. Just seeing her sitting on the mattress made me want to lose my stomach. But it wasn't real, and I could handle it. I'd handled much worse already.



Just as Kellan was about to say something to me, we were approached from behind. Dressed in his trademark impeccable suit, Nick strode into the room with a tall man with hair longer than my sister's. Pulled back into a neat ponytail, the blond locks almost reached his backside. Nick gave Sienna a snake oil smile, holding his arms wide open. "Sienna, baby, you look fantastic."



She melted under his praise, leaping off of the bed to give him a kiss on the cheek in greeting. "As do you, Nicholas."



Wrapping an arm around his pop star prodigy, Nick turned to Kellan. "Good to see you, Kellan." He lifted an eyebrow; the look oozed triumph, like he'd known all along that Kellan would agree to this.



Jaw tight, Kellan nodded. Ignoring the heat in Kellan's gaze, Nick indicated Ponytail Man. "Boys, this is Diedrich Kraus, visionary genius." He indicated the D-Bags. "Diedrich, this is Kellan, Matt, Evan, and Griffin." He squeezed Sienna's waist. "And you already know Sienna."



Trying to ignore the fact that I was completely skipped over in the introductions, I watched Diedrich smile at Sienna and then address Kellan. Reaching out for his hand, he spoke in a thick accent that I couldn't quite place. Swedish, maybe? "It is very excellent to meet you." Clasping both of his hands around Kellan's, he exclaimed, "The camera is going to love you! You and Miss Sexton are going to sizzle every piece of equipment in this place."



He was laughing to himself when a man in a clipboard came up to the group and announced that everyone needed to get to wardrobe, hair, and makeup. Sienna sauntered off in one direction while the boys were ushered a different way. Kellan kissed my cheek, telling me that he'd be back in a minute. I couldn't help but wonder just what his wardrobe would consist of. Hopefully he'd at least get to keep his underwear on.



While I wondered what to do with myself, Diedrich was called away and only Nick and I remained. Blue eyes hard, he turned to me and asked, "Are you going to be a problem?"



Lifting my chin, I tried to be as confident as possible. It was challenging, but I managed to pull off a firm, "No."



Nick gave me a lopsided grin. "Good. Because I'll have your ass tossed out of here if you mess with this production." Leaning in, he whispered, "And I'm pretty sure I could toss you all the way back to Seattle if I needed to. Just something for you to keep in mind, in case you find any of this . . . distasteful." Seeming like he didn't have a care in the world, Nick suddenly smacked his hands together. "Now, let's do this!"



Needing to do something with my nervous energy, I headed for the snack table. I was munching through my weight in carrots when Griffin strolled into the room. He was fully dressed-tight black pants, fitted gray shirt, loose leather jacket, and a studded wristband. I'd always found Griffin's personality distracting, but physically, he was a cute guy, and looked really good today. Standing by the set, he had a deep frown on his face. Looking around the room, he spotted me and started heading my way. Wondering if I wanted to talk to him right now, I popped another carrot in my mouth and debated moving on to the chocolates.



Grabbing a peppermint disc, Griffin quickly unwrapped it and popped it into his mouth. "This sucks," he murmured.



I sort of agreed, but I was surprised by his reaction, so I asked, "Aren't you excited to film your first video?"



Looking a little surprised that I'd acknowledged his existence, Griffin took a second before answering. When he did, he turned toward me, giving me his full attention. I had to fight the natural urge I had to take a step back. "Oh, yeah, I'm totally stoked. But they're filming the band scenes at the same time they're filming the love scene," he pointed over to the pristine bed, "so I won't get to watch Sienna Sexton roll around half-naked. It's not fair."



Wondering if maybe I should watch the boys instead of Kellan, I sighed, "Yeah . . . not fair."



Griffin seemed even more surprised that I agreed with him. I didn't necessarily agree with him, I just wasn't enjoying much of anything right now. Forgoing the vegetables, I grabbed a Kit-Kat and moodily chomped into it. Griffin watched me while he chewed on his candy. "You still freaked out about Sienna and Kellan?"



Wondering how on earth Griffin had become my confidant, I shrugged and nodded. "Yeah. I'm really not looking forward to this."



Swallowing the last bits of his candy, he nodded as he looked back at the bedroom set that filled me with dread. "Don't worry about it. It's just tonsil hockey . . . maybe some grinding." He looked back at me while I grimaced. Grinding? "Kellan's in such a pissy mood today, I doubt he'll even get a half-chub." My eyes widened. I hadn't even considered Kellan becoming aroused during this whole nightmare. But of course that was a possibility; blood flow wasn't exactly something a person could control.



Griffin rolled his eyes. "You should have heard him complaining in wardrobe." His voice went up an octave in a poor imitation of Kellan's. "Oh, poor me, I have to make out with a hot superstar. Women fawn over me wherever I go. I have fucktastic hair and an eight pack. Boo-hoo."



Twisting his lips in a look of contempt, he made an obscene gesture over his privates. I couldn't help the small smile that crept onto my face. He was rude and crude and said things I didn't want to hear sometimes, but somehow Griffin was also amusing in a comforting sort of way, and I actually did feel better. Lord, help me.



Griffin was dragged away a few minutes before Sienna showed up. Wearing a fluffy white robe, she looked incredible. As I wandered closer to the fake bedroom, Diedrich approached her. He indicated the crowd of people in the room, probably asking her if she wanted a closed set. Sienna looked around, shrugged, and shook her head. Nothing bothered this woman. Slipping the robe off of her shoulders, she handed it to an aide hovering nearby. My jaw dropped at the skimpy underwear set she was proudly wearing. Even though I'd seen her in a bikini that was about as revealing, there was something about underwear that made it ten times more provocative.



Someone in the back of the room whistled, and Sienna flashed a grin that way. Diedrich frowned and snapped something to another aide. I figured somebody just got fired. The bed on set only had a thin, silky sheet for a cover. An aide pulled the sheet back for her, and Sienna seductively crawled onto the firm mattress. As she settled into place, Kellan made his appearance. Like Sienna had been, he was wearing a robe. I stopped halfway across the room and watched him. He was looking down at Sienna sprawled on top of the satin sheet. There was a look on his face that was close to sadness. It made me want to hug him.



Sienna frowned at his expression and patted the bed beside her. Diedrich started talking to Kellan, maybe giving him pointers on how to make love to a woman-like Kellan needed pointers. I noticed that Diedrich didn't seem to be asking Kellan if he wanted the room cleared. I guess that consideration was only for females. Kellan was nodding as he started removing his robe. I chewed on my lip as his beautiful skin came into sight. He was wearing underwear, thankfully, but not boxers like he normally wore. Instead he had on low slung boxer-briefs. They looked . . . good on him. Some of the female members of the crew stopped and stared, but none of them were stupid enough to whistle.



Even from the distance between us, I could see that his chest was flawless . . . no tattoo. I guess the makeup department had covered it up. They probably didn't want my name all over the video since they were trying to promote a Kellan/Sienna love fest. His wedding ring was most likely gone too.



Before he crawled into bed with another woman, Kellan looked around the room. He spotted me instantly, and gave me a brief, troubled smile. This was hard for him. It made me feel better that it was. Griffin was right; Kellan didn't want this.



I nodded my encouragement and forced myself to step closer, to show my support. Kellan sidled up to Sienna in the middle of the bed and she eagerly wrapped her arms around him. I wanted to tell her that she didn't need to canoodle with him when the cameras weren't rolling, but Nick was eyeing me warily, so I kept my mouth shut.



Another assistant adjusted the sheet so it just covered the couple's hips. Lights were adjusted, and reflective panels were put into place, giving the pair of lovers mood lighting. Cameras whirred to life, red lights on the top of them indicating that they were ready. Large screens beside them showed just how the recording would look in the finished cut. My gaze flitted from the real couple to the couple on the screen. I found it easier to stomach if I watched the television. Somehow that seemed less real.



On the screen, Kellan seemed nervous as he lay on his back beside Sienna. She was propped up on her elbow, leaning over him, her dark hair brushing his shoulder. She didn't seem nervous at all. She seemed . . . ecstatic. Before I was ready, the director yelled action and the room silenced.



Kellan didn't do anything, he didn't even move. Sienna did. Leaning over, she touched her lips to his. I bit my cheek so hard I tasted blood. Kellan tentatively kissed her back, but it was nothing that anyone would constitute as hot. Awkward would be a better description. Every move of his lips against hers was clearly forced. Looking a little frustrated, Sienna climbed onto his stomach, grinding her hips into him as she did. Again, Kellan didn't react like someone in that situation actually would. All he did was lay there while she attacked him. Slightly frowning, Sienna tossed her hair over her shoulder, and dove in for his mouth. Thanks to the close-up on the screen I was watching, I could see her tongue dart between his lips. I could also tell from how little his jaw moved, that he wasn't letting her in. He was resisting; it was clear as day that he wasn't into this woman ravaging him.



"Cut!"



The sudden voice in the stillness made my heart skip a beat. I unfurled my hands and rubbed out the indents of my fingernails on my palms. I hadn't noticed, but I'd almost drawn blood there too.



Sienna rolled off of Kellan while he sat up. "He's not giving me anything to work with!" she yelled.



Kellan sighed and looked over at her. "I'm sorry. I'm trying."



"No, you're not, Kellan," I muttered. Worrying my lip, I hated the fact that I may have to give my husband a pep talk so he could successfully make love to another woman on film. Which was doubly strange, considering the fact that Kellan had already filmed a love scene or two in his lifetime. In retrospect, filming fake sex should have been a walk in the park for him. But he was clearly struggling.



As Nick bellowed at Kellan to get with the program, Kellan searched for me. Standing near the monitors, I nodded at him and mouthed, "It's okay." He sighed again and looked away.



Nick was shooting bullets into me with his eyes, like Kellan's tepid mood was entirely my fault. It made me think that maybe I should leave so this would be easier for Kellan. Just as I was considering going to watch the other D-Bags, Diedrich took a more proactive approach to his temperamental actor's reluctance. "Remove the bra, sweetheart." Much quieter, he added, "We'll get his blood pumping one way or another." Some of the men around him laughed. Staying put, I clenched my fists again.



Sienna shrugged and then removed her tiny black bra. She handed it to an assistant, not even bothering to cover herself up. How does a person get so much confidence that exposing their chest to a roomful of strangers didn't even faze them? It boggled my mind. As did the perfection of her bountiful breasts.



Tearing my gaze from her, I looked down at Kellan. His eyes were averted and he shifted on the bed like it was the most uncomfortable place he'd ever laid down in. Even though he was in a spot that most men would willingly chop off their right arm to be, I couldn't help but feel bad for him. He looked miserable.



Sienna either didn't notice or was choosing to ignore it. Climbing on top of him again, she pressed her bare chest into his. Someone on the set made sure none of her unmentionable parts were showing while Kellan stared up at the ceiling and exhaled in a long, even breath. What I wouldn't give to know what he was thinking right now.



After one last nipple check was done, an assistant grabbed Kellan's hand and placed it on Sienna's ass. Then they took his other one and placed it on the low ridge of her back-one of Kellan's favorite spots. Sienna smiled and whispered something to him. Kellan looked down at her face and gave her a tight smile in return. Everything about him seemed tense, like he couldn't relax . . . or he was afraid to.



Diedrich yelled action again, and Sienna leaned down to kiss him again. My heart instantly started beating harder, and I had to practice deep cleansing breaths. Kellan mildly kissed her back, his rigid hands glued into position on her body. It went on for a seemingly endless amount of time-Sienna trying her damnedest to turn him on, Kellan barely responding. He was so different than the passionate man I knew him to be.



Just when I thought Diedrich was going to yell cut again and Nick was going to evict me from the premises, Kellan sucked in a deep breath, closed his eyes, and started coming to life. It began with his hands, traveling over her skin, playing with the indent of her low spine. Then he started kissing her with genuine fervor. Before I knew it, there were flashes of their tongues meeting on the mega-sized screen right in front of my face. Lip smacking had been clear in the air for a while, but now that Sienna was getting a response from him, her light moans punctuated the silence. I felt warmth trickle down my palms as my fingernails finally cut through the skin.



Oh. My. God. What did I agree to let him do?



Now that his "actors" were getting into their roles, Diedrich started barking out commands-feel this, touch that, lift your head, kiss her there, roll her over. By the time Kellan had her on her back, he was completely and totally immersed in what he was doing. Tears stung my eyes, but I made myself continue to watch.



There was a camera at the foot of the bed as well as one beside the bed. The one at the foot was getting an impressive view of Kellan's defined back. The thin bed sheet was strategically placed low on Kellan's hips, just enough to cover his underwear, giving the viewer the illusion that he was naked. The sheet was so thin that it outlined his body, and every thrust he gave Sienna was completely obvious, and disturbingly graphic.



The camera beside the bed was the one getting a close-up of their faces. That one almost disturbed me more, because the expression on Kellan's face was one I'd seen before . . . when he was with me. Eyes closed, he was breathing hard in between frantic kisses. Sienna was squirming and groaning beneath him; it wouldn't surprise me in the least if she wasn't acting, if he actually was pleasing her. Was she pleasing him? Was he aroused? I had no idea, and it drove me crazy not to know. I think knowing would have driven me crazy too, though.



Kellan's lips played over hers. His tongue ducked into her mouth, then slid over to trace the outline of her ear. Upon request of the director, Kellan's fingers trailed up her side, stopping right over the breast closest to the camera, cupping it. I thought I'd seen enough to give me nightmares for a month, but then Kellan ran his nose up her throat, his tongue stretching out to lightly taste her skin.



An irrational jealousy swept through me. That was my favorite move! And he was using it on this . . . bitch! True, we hadn't set any boundaries on what he could and couldn't do today, but, out of respect for me, couldn't he stay away from moves that were used in our bedroom?



Words that my mother had spoken to me last Christmas leapt to life in my brain. It takes a special person to be able to handle all of the attention he'll receive. Are you sure you're that woman? I'm sure my mom hadn't anticipated this level of attention, but her point was suddenly a valid one. Could I handle this?



I started to turn away from him, disgusted, but then I remembered the look on his face when this all started. And I remembered the pressure he was under to do this-by his band, by the label, even by me. And then I remembered what I'd told him when I first talked him into this, when he said he couldn't do it. Just pretend she's me. My eyes snapped back to him on the monitor. Was that what he was doing? Pretending she was me?



The director yelled cut, and Kellan froze and immediately rolled off of her. He kept his eyes closed as he laid his head back on the pillows. I could see his chest heaving, and as he swallowed, I swear I saw his jaw tremble. My concern for him instantly shot past my brief moment of jealousy. God, was he okay with this?



Sienna sure was. She was fanning herself like Kellan was the greatest thing since sliced bread. How could she be so oblivious to his turmoil? Was I the only one that noticed how tightly he kept his eyes closed, like he was afraid to open them? I wanted to run over to him, to tell him that I wasn't mad, but after some quick adjustments, Diedrich yelled action again, and the making out continued.



When the camera was rolling, Kellan seemed fine-he smiled, teased, tasted, appeared like he loved her-but the minute there was a break, he went rigid stiff, and kept his eyes sealed shut. I don't think he'd opened them once since he'd finally caved and kissed her. He must be terrified of what I thought, of what he thought he'd see on my face.



The filming took hours, and I was exhausted by the time they wrapped. Looking pleased as punch, Diedrich profusely thanked his stars and announced that he'd see everyone tomorrow. Kellan shot up off of the bed, grabbed his robe from a crew member nearby, and darted off the set before I could even call his name. For the first time since it began, Sienna looked sad as she put her robe on over her still-bare chest.



Ignoring her melancholy, I set off in search of my morose husband, but I couldn't find him. The place was a maze of hallways and people. I ran into the other D-Bags before I ran into him. Back in street clothes, a boisterous Evan wrapped me in a bear hug. "Kiera! You are not gonna believe how badass we looked!"



Setting me down, Evan searched the hallway. "Where's Kellan?"



As Matt gave me concerned eyes, and Griffin chatted with a nearby blonde that I recognized as Kellan's robe holder, I shrugged. "I don't know . . . he kind of took off."



Matt shrugged. "Maybe he needed air? Maybe he's waiting in the car?"



Not knowing where else to look for him, I nodded and let the guys escort me outside. Sienna waved as I passed by her dressing room. She was back in her street clothes as well, but her fit body was still seared into my brain. As was the image of Kellan's tongue running up her throat. My stomach was churning a little bit when we got outside, and I inhaled the fresh air like I'd been in a stagnant cave for decades.



Evan patted my back, then pointed at a black limo waiting for us. "Car's here. Let's go see if Kellan's waiting for you." Eyes moist, I gave him a weak nod.



The driver opened the door as we approached. My heart was thudding as all of the boys hopped inside. I heard Evan greet Kellan. So he was hiding in the car. I heard Griffin ask him how it was, and I felt faint. It was awful. That's how it was. I hesitated at the car door, not sure if I could stomach seeing Kellan yet. It was all just too . . . fresh.



Hating myself, I ducked into the car and purposely avoided looking his way. I stared out the window as the car started moving. I could feel Kellan's eyes on me, but I couldn't bring myself to look at him. It was the oddest feeling I'd ever had. I recognized how difficult it had been for him, I realized that he'd pretended she was me so he could get through it, and I wanted to comfort him, because I'd seen how badly he'd been bothered by doing it. And yet, at the same time, I didn't want to see his face. I knew if I did, I would see hers too. And I just couldn't handle it at the moment.



As the conversations in the limo died down, the tension built. Eventually, it was so thick I had to believe that even Griffin felt it. In fact, he started to ask, "Are you two fighting?" but someone elbowed him before he could finish saying it. Good thing, too, because I wasn't sure if we were or not. All I knew was I still felt ill, and I still loved Kellan more than anything.



I got out of the car the minute the driver opened the door and dashed upstairs, slamming our bedroom door shut. I had to see him. I couldn't possibly avoid him. I just needed . . . a minute. Grief welled in me, followed immediately by guilt. This was my idea, and I'd requested to watch it. All of this self-inflicted pain was unnecessary. I couldn't stop feeling it, though. Hearing the guys in the lounge area, I quickly walked into the bathroom and turned on a faucet so I could cry in peace. As I wiped a knuckle under my eye, I noticed my bloody palms from where I'd cut myself. Eyes wide, I scrubbed my hands under the cool water.



That's when the bathroom door was tapped on. "Kiera . . ."



There was so much pain in his voice, I shut off the water. I hiccupped back a sob and stared at myself in the mirror, willing myself to calm down. This was only as big of a deal as we made it. I remembered the look of horror on his face, the clear reluctance in his first few kisses. Those images helped burn away the heated, passionate kisses that had happened later. I could do this. I could handle being with him. I could handle being his wife.



When my breathing returned to normal, his voice called to me again. "Kiera . . . please."



His voice hitched, and I heard a sound I'd never wanted to hear from him again. He was crying. Wiping my hands dry, I opened the bathroom door. He had his head in his hands, and his shoulders were shaking. I immediately wrapped my arms around him. He buried his head in my neck, murmuring, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Please don't hate me . . . please don't leave me."



I held him tight to me, my tears threatening to resurface. Stroking his hair, I shushed him, whispering, "It's okay . . . I'm not mad . . . it's okay."



Eventually, he pulled back to look at me; his eyes were red, his cheeks wet. "How can you not be mad after what you saw? How can you not . . ."-his voice hitched-"hate me?"



I held his cheeks in my palms. "Who were you kissing today?"



He scrunched his brows, confused, then his expression softened. "You . . . I was kissing you. I was thinking about the first time we made love . . . after you told me that you loved me." His smile was radiant, even under the layer of pain still on his face.



I nodded, my smile matching his. "I know. I could tell . . . and that's why I'm not mad. I know you were with me . . . and I love you so much."



Kellan sagged in my arms as relief filled him. "God, thank you. I was so scared I'd just lost you. You wouldn't even look at me in the car . . ."



I held him to me, nestling against him. "I'm sorry. I just needed a minute. That was . . . intense."



Kellan pulled back to look at me. "Never again. I don't care what's at stake. I don't care who I have to let down. I won't ever do that to you again. You . . . or me. I'm done playing their game."



I sagged against him, my relief equally palpable. Kellan started bringing his lips down to mine, and I bristled. His eyes were wide when I pushed him back, the fear and tension instantly returning to his features. Cringing, I told him, "You . . . smell like her."



Kellan clenched his jaw, anger flooding his features. "Not for long."



Walking over to the shower, he turned it on high and stripped off his clothes. I smiled at seeing his familiar black boxers. I never wanted to see him in briefs again. Stripping those off, he climbed into the shower. I quickly added my clothes to the pile and climbed in after him. He gave me a brief smile as he handed me a bar of soap. "I want every trace of her off of me." Nodding, I got to work on cleaning his back.



When I got to his front, I scrubbed extra hard over his tattoo until the industrial strength makeup finally dissolved and my name sprang back to life. When it was visible again, I smiled and kissed the indelible ink. Kellan gave me a charming grin as he started working on sanitizing his hair. Locks full of suds, he gazed at me while I scrubbed his legs clean.



When I worked my way between his legs, his eyes fluttered closed and he told me, "That's the one part she didn't touch." He cracked an eye open, "But I do appreciate your thoroughness." Giggling, I reached up to kiss him. He put a hand out to stop me. "Wait. One more spot."



While I wondered what spot on him I'd possibly missed, Kellan grabbed the bottle of shampoo and squirted some in his mouth. I dropped the bar of soap as I gaped at him. "Kellan!"



Holding up his finger, he swished the horrid liquid around his mouth, then he made a face like he was about to vomit, and leaned over to spit it out. While he choked and sputtered, I started laughing. My eyes watered with merriment, and it felt so good. "I cannot believe you just did that!"



Kellan held his face up to the showerhead; bubbles foamed from his mouth and traveled down his chin. The tears ran down my cheeks as I laughed. Spitting and choking, Kellan scrubbed his tongue with the top of a loofah sponge. I had to hold in my stomach; my sides were starting to cramp.



Turning off the water, Kellan twisted his lips in disgust. "God, that was nasty."



Getting my breathing under control, I wiped the happy tears off of my damp skin. "That was not necessary, Kellan."



Kellan grinned as his adoring eyes searched my face. "Yes, it was."



Loving him more than I ever believed possible, I wrapped my arms around his neck and hopped up so I could wrap my legs around his waist. "I love you . . . even if you are insane."



Kellan was chuckling as he opened the shower door. "Good, because I think I'm going to be burping soap bubbles for a week." Tangling my hands through his hair, I gazed at him until I thought my heart might burst. He unwaveringly met my eyes. "I love you too, Kiera. Just you. You're my always."