“Jen was never satisfied with Cole’s position as a city attorney,” Joyce explained. “We’d have coffee together every now and then, and all she’d do was complain how Cole was wasting his talents and that he could be making big money and wasn’t. She had grander plans for him. But Cole loved his job and felt an obligation to follow through with his commitments. Jennifer never understood that. She didn’t even try to sympathize with Cole’s point of view. She constantly wanted more, better, newer things. She didn’t work herself, so it was all up to Cole.” Joyce shrugged sadly.
“Jen was never happy, never satisfied,” she went on. “She hated the house and the neighborhood, but figured out that all the whining and manipulating in the world wasn’t going to do one bit of good. Cole intended to finish out his responsibilities to the city, so she played her ace. She left him, taking Bobby with her.”
“But didn’t Cole try to gain custody of Bobby?”
“Of course. He knew, and so did everyone else, that Jennifer was using their son as a pawn. She was never the motherly type, if you know what I mean. If you want the truth, she was an alcoholic. There were several times I dropped Bobby off at the house and suspected Jen had been drinking heavily. I was willing to testify on Cole’s behalf, and I told him so. He was grateful, but then the accident happened and it was too late.”
“The accident?” A heaviness settled in her chest. Each breath pained her and brought with it the memories she longed to forget, memories of another accident—the one that had taken her husband.
“It was Jennifer’s fault—the accident, I mean. She’d been drinking and should never have been behind the wheel. The day before, Cole had been to see his attorneys, pleading with them to move quickly because he was afraid Jennifer was becoming more and more irresponsible. But it wasn’t until after she’d moved out that Cole realized how sick she’d become, how dependent she was on alcohol to make it through the day.”
“Oh, no,” Robin whispered. “Cole must’ve felt so guilty.”
“It was terrible,” Joyce returned, her voice quavering. “I didn’t know if Cole would survive that first year. He hid inside the house and severed relationships with everyone in the neighborhood. He was consumed by his grief. Later he seemed to come out of it a little, but he’s never been the same.
“The irony of all this is that eventually Jen would’ve gotten exactly what she wanted if she’d been more patient. A couple of years ago, Cole accepted a partnership in one of the most important law firms in the city. He’s made a real name for himself, but money and position don’t seem to mean much to him—they never have. I wouldn’t be surprised if he walked away from the whole thing someday.”
“I think you’re right. Cole told me not long ago that he has some property north of here that he inherited from his grandfather. He’s restoring the house, and he said something about moving there. It’s where he spends most of his weekends.”
“I wondered if that was it,” Joyce said, nodding. “There were rumors floating around the neighborhood that he spent his weekends with a woman. Anyone who knew Cole would realize what a crock that is. Cole isn’t the type to have a secret affair.”
Robin felt ashamed, remembering how she’d been tempted to believe the rumor herself.
“For a long time,” Joyce murmured, “I wondered if Cole was ever going to recover from Jennifer’s and Bobby’s deaths, but now I believe he has. I can’t help thinking you and Jeff had a lot to do with that.”
“I…think he would gradually have come out of his shell.”
“Perhaps, but the changes in him lately have been the most encouraging things so far. I don’t know how you feel about Cole or if there’s anything between you, but you couldn’t find a better man.”
“I…I’m falling in love with him,” Robin whispered, voicing her feelings for the first time. The words hung there, and it was too late to take them back.
“I think that’s absolutely wonderful, I really do!” Joyce said enthusiastically.
“I don’t.” Now that the shock had worn off, Robin was forced to confront her anger. Cole had told her none of this. Not a single word. That hurt. Hurt more than she would’ve expected. But the ache she felt was nothing compared to the grief Cole must face each morning, the pain that weighed down his life.
“Oh, dear,” Joyce said. “I’ve really done it now, haven’t I? I knew I should’ve kept my mouth shut. You’re upset and it’s my fault.”
“Nonsense,” Robin whispered, making an effort to bring a smile to her dry lips and not succeeding. “I’m grateful we met, and more than grateful you told me about Jennifer, and about Cole’s son.” The knowledge produced a dull ache in Robin’s heart. She felt grief for Cole and a less worthy emotion, too—a sense of being slighted by his lack of trust in her.
She was so distressed on the short drive home that she missed the turn and had to take a side street and double back to Orchard Street.
As she neared the house, she saw that Cole was outside watering his lawn. He waved, but she pretended not to see him and pulled into her driveway. Desperate for some time alone before facing Cole, Robin did her best to ignore him as she climbed out of the car. She needed a few more minutes to gather her thoughts and control her emotions.
She was almost safe, almost at the house, when Cole stopped her.
“Robin,” he called, jogging toward her. “Hold on a minute, would you?”
She managed to compose herself, squaring her shoulders and drawing on her dignity.
His wonderful eyes were smiling as he hurried over. Obviously he hadn’t noticed there was anything wrong. “Did Jeff happen to say anything about seeing us kiss last night?” he asked.
Her mouth was still so dry she had to swallow a couple of times before she could utter a single syllable. “Yes, but don’t worry, I think I’ve got him squared away.”
“Drat!” he teased, snapping his fingers. “I suppose this means I don’t have to go through with the shotgun wedding?”
She nodded, keeping her eyes lowered, fearing he’d be able to read all the emotion churning inside her.
“You have nothing to fear but fear itself,” she said, forcing a lightness into her tone.
“Robin?” He made her name a question and a caress. “Is something wrong?”
She shook her head, shifting the bag of groceries from one arm to the other. “Of course not,” she said with the same feigned cheerfulness.