After three wives, three divorces and child support payments for two separate families, Barney was speaking from experience—of a particularly negative sort.
“Gloria was special,” his longtime friend said. “You’re not going to find another one like her. So if it’s those qualities that attract you to Carol, look again. You may only be seeing what you want to see.”
“You wanna yell?” Angelina Pasquale shouted from the doorway of the kitchen into the living room where her grandchildren were squabbling. “Then let’s have a contest. But remember—I’ve been doing it longer. They can hear me all the way in Jersey City.”
Peter and his younger cousins ceased their shouting match, and with a nod of her head, Angelina returned to the kitchen, satisfied that a single threat from her was enough to bring about peace that would last through the afternoon.
Carol was busy slicing tomatoes for the salad, and her sister-in-law, Paula, was spreading garlic butter on thick slices of French bread.
The sauce was warming on the stove, and the water for the long strands of fresh pasta was just starting to boil. The pungent scent of basil and thyme circled the kitchen like smoke from a campfire. From Carol’s earliest memory, her mother had cooked a pot of spaghetti sauce every Saturday evening. The unused portion from Sunday’s dinner was served in a variety of ways during the week. Leftover pot roast became something delectable with her mother’s sauce over top. And chicken with Mama’s sauce rivaled even the Cajun chicken at Jake’s restaurant.
“So, Carol,” her mother began, wiping her hands on the ever-present apron. She took a large wooden spoon and stirred the kettle of simmering sauce. “I suppose your English friend thinks good spaghetti sauce comes from a jar,” she said disparagingly. This was her way of letting Carol know the time had come to invite Alex and his son to Sunday dinner.
“Mama, Alex plays golf on Sundays.”
“Every Sunday?”
Carol nodded.
“That’s because he’s never tasted my sauce.” Angelina shook her head as though to suggest Alex had wasted much of his life walking from green to green when he could’ve been having dinner at her house.
Adding serving utensils to the salad, Carol set the wooden bowl on the dining room table.
Tony, Carol’s brother, sauntered into the kitchen and slipped his arms around Paula’s waist. “How much longer until dinner? The natives are getting restless.”
“Eleven minutes,” Angelina answered promptly. She tasted the end of the wooden spoon and nodded in approval.
Carol returned to the kitchen and noticed that her mother was watching her under the guise of waiting for the water to boil. The question Carol had expected all day finally came.
“You gonna marry this non-Italian?” her mother asked, then added the noodles, stirring with enough energy to create a whirlpool in the large stainless-steel pot.
“Mama,” Carol cried. “I barely know Alex. We’ve only gone out a handful of times.”
“Ah, but your eyes are telling me something different.”
“The only thing my eyes are interested in is some of that garlic bread Paula’s making,” Carol said, hoping to divert her mother’s attention from the subject of Alex.
“Here.” Her sister-in-law handed her a slice. “But it’s no substitute for a man.” Paula turned her head to press a quick kiss on her husband’s cheek.
Tony’s hands slipped further around Paula’s waist as he whispered in his wife’s ear. From the way her sister-in-law’s face flooded with warm color, Carol didn’t need much of an imagination to guess what Tony had said.
Carol looked away. She wasn’t embarrassed by the earthy exchange between her brother and his wife; instead, she felt a peculiar twinge of envy. The realization shocked her. In all the years she’d been alone, Carol had never once longed for a pair of arms to hold her or for a man to whisper suggestive comments in her ear. Those intimacies were reserved for the happily married members of her family.
Yet, here she was, standing in the middle of her mother’s kitchen, yearning for Alex to stroll up behind her, circle her waist and whisper promises in her ear. The image was so vivid that she hurried into the living room to escape it.
It wasn’t until later, when the dishes were washed, that Carol had a chance to sort through her thoughts. Tony and Peter were puttering around in the garage. Paula was playing a game of Yahtzee with the younger children. And Angelina was rocking in her chair, nimble fingers working delicate yarn into a sweater for her smallest grandchild.
“So are you gonna tell your mama what’s troubling you?” she asked Carol out of the blue.
“Nothing’s wrong,” Carol fibbed. She couldn’t discuss what she didn’t understand. For the first time, she felt distanced from the love and laughter that was so much a part of Sunday dinner with her family. For years she’d clung to the life she’d built for herself and her son. These few, short weeks with Alex had changed everything.
Alex had discovered all her weaknesses and used them to his own advantage. Digging up the earth for her herb garden was a good example. She could’ve asked her brother to do it for her. Eventually she probably would have. But Tony did so much to help her already that she didn’t want to burden him with another request. It wasn’t as if tilling part of the backyard was essential. But one casual mention to Alex, and next thing she knew, there was freshly tilled earth waiting for basil and Italian parsley where before there’d been lawn.
“You like this man, don’t you?”
Carol responded with a tiny nod of her head.
A slow, easy smile rose from her mother’s mouth to her eyes. “I thought so. You got the look.”
“The look?”