“You can’t go home, Thalia. You belong with me at the Citadel. You know I would just come after you again.” I could tell he meant it.
“Joss, I don’t know if I’ll be allowed to go back to the Citadel. I tried to glance at Hemi and gauge his reaction, but since Joss had backed off, he’d put the knife away and sat back in the chair. Now his eyes were closed, and he rested his head on his chest feigning sleep. I knew better. I swore I could see his ears twitch with interest. My stomach growled and I began to dip the bread into my now cold but still delicious soup.
“Thalia, there’s something I would like to ask you.” Joss wrapped his hands around his mug and stared at its half empty contents for a few seconds. He took a deep breath, pushed the mug away, and looked up at me with a guarded expression. “Are you in love with Kael?”
The question startled me and the soft bread became like a stone. I couldn’t swallow it. I coughed loudly, reaching desperately for the cider to wash down the bread before it killed me.
Joss leaned over to try and give me a reassuring pat on the back.
During this whole horrid scene, Hemi still hadn’t moved.
“Joss. I’m really—um—not sure that I—no. I’m not—in love with anyone!” I shot out in between fits of coughing. One great red eyebrow rose on Hemi’s large face before it dropped back down and he let out a snore. Absolutely feigning sleep.
Finally, when my coughing subsided and my faced returned to a normal color, I looked over at Joss. His expression was unreadable. Joss’s blue-green eyes gazed at me thoughtfully. He leaned back in his chair and tapped his fingers along the hard wood table.
“Huh, I wasn’t expecting that answer. Not exactly. But then I guess I deserve it, because I need to earn back your trust. Don’t worry. I will.” Joss flashed me a very relieved and determined smile.
I was happy—I think—at his reaction, but I suddenly felt overwhelmingly tired.
“I’m sorry, but I think I need to get some rest.”
Joss immediately jumped up and Hemi lumbered up as well. My room ended up being the same room as the last time I’d stayed here. Joss and Hemi shared the room connected to mine.
Hemi had already walked through my room and checked the door between the rooms. He went back in to settle in for the night, which left Joss and me alone in the hallway. Joss was reluctant to say goodnight. Only one sconce on the wall remained lit. My door, at the end of the hall, was in the darkest corner.
Joss grabbed my hand and clasped it in between his. It was warm and comforting, until I looked into his face and saw the heat burning there. Suddenly an excited thrill race up my body.
“You don’t know how scared I’ve been, knowing you were gone and that I couldn’t go after you. I was drowning in worry the last few days without you. But now that I have you back, I can breathe again.” He pressed his forehead into mine as his hands delicately ran up my forearms sending a wave of goose bumps in their wake.
I shuddered and pressed myself closer to him. It was a different being near Joss than it was with Kael. Joss was like a slow burning flame that, if given the chance, could quickly spread and overtake me. And I truly believed he would give up everything to be with me, even leaving his home, his clan. That thought both disturbed me and pleased me.
“Do you trust me?” he asked.
“Yes.”
Joss leaned forward and ran his fingers back up my arm, but this time it was different. I felt a tingle of power race up my body and I shivered. It was warm and thrilling. I could see what he was doing. He was opening up a thread of power and was slowly trickling it along my skin. It was intoxicating to be touched by his power, and I wanted to be closer, wanted more. He leaned in and I closed the distance between us greedily.
The mix of our power and our kiss made my subconscious rise. Even with my eyes closed, I could see the bright light that was his center pulsing and burning brightly. My thread of power reached toward his and caressed it gently. Joss shivered in reaction. But then I saw the color of my power. His was glowing gold, mine a dark shadow. Could he not see the difference, see how wrong mine was? I tried to dismiss my frustration and lose myself once more in the kiss, reaching for him hungrily.
Joss groaned.
I was no longer touching him but draining him, like I had done with Kael.
“No!” I ripped myself away from the kiss and stared at Joss in fear. We were both breathing heavily and I held up a hand, warning him to keep his distance. I reached behind me for the door handle. Quickly, I disappeared behind the door and slid the lock in place.
“Hey,” Joss whispered through the door. “I don’t know what just happened, but it was unforgettable.”
“That kiss, dear Joss, was almost your undoing. I think we might both be safer with a solid door between us for now.”
“But that door will have to be opened sometime, someday.”
“If you knew what was good for you, you would keep it closed.” Permanently, I whispered under my breath. “I’ll see you in the morning, Joss,” I called out, hoping to end the conversation and his hovering by my door. It was a few minutes before the door to the room next door opened and closed.
My head was starting to pound and I knew how to read the signs. Kael was fast. Faster than I gave him credit for.
I sighed and moved to ready myself for bed. I cleaned the road dust off with the bowl of water and bar of soap that was provided. I opened the window to let in a cool breeze and then changed into a clean pair of pants and long over shirt. I pulled out the extra knife I kept in my boot, extinguished the candle, and lay in the cold bed, waiting. I listened to the hustle and bustle of the inn as people came in, ate, drank, and either left or went to a room.
Even though I was exhausted, I didn’t sleep. It must have been after midnight. I shivered in the cold, refusing to close the window and holding onto the knife under my pillow. I made sure to face the wall so I could see the crack of moonlight coming in. It was another hour after before my headache receded.
I gripped the knife tighter in my hand, noticing the slight change of shadow as the window shutter opened from the outside. I watched as it was slowly closed all the way and then heard him latch it from the inside. I turned silently to lie on my back.
The room was now in complete darkness, but I could see perfectly. Kael was moving closer to me, and I smiled maliciously.
My hand shot out with the knife toward his chest, but he caught it easily. With two swift moves, he disarmed me and pinned my hands behind above my head. My knife lay useless across the floor. I was trapped under his body.
“You know there is such a thing as a door,” I whispered. “You should try it sometime.”
“I like the challenge,” was his reply back. My heart beat louder in my chest but I froze, refusing to move. The same way he could always find me, I was able to tell whenever he was near, especially if we’d been apart for any long periods of time. Stupid headache.
“I think you’re losing your touch in your old age, Kael.” I looked down at the knife that was on the floor. “Not as silent as you used to be.”
“Maybe I wouldn’t have to keep sneaking in windows and houses if you would just stay in one place instead of running off,” he squeezed my wrists firmly in a gentle warning, and rolled onto his back next to me on the bed sinking comfortably into my pillow.