I didn’t have towers or gates barring bad memories because the memories were dealt with. I no longer segmented off my mind. Because everything was in its rightful place, and I just knew.
Knew that this was my absolute home. My happy place. The epicentre of my soul.
“You’re still struggling, Suzette?” I whispered, letting her busy herself with untangling my hair. Grabbing a brush from one of the drawers, Suzette proceeded to tame my curls, building the golden glow that’d been lost thanks to stress and lack of sleep.
“I’m not struggling, exactly. I’ve put it all behind me. But I haven’t got to the point where I’m okay with it—you know?”
I captured her hand, holding her still. Her knobbly fingers were brittle and arthritic from so many unnatural breaks at the sadistic whims of masters. So many trafficked women lived nightmarish existences. I’d survived and I would use my newfound strength to work beside Q. I would dedicate my life to the Feathers of Hope charity and try to give every broken woman a happy ending like mine.
I placed my hands in my lap. “I understand completely. I was at that place when Q brought me back by giving me his pain. He’d fixed me, but there was still so much unresolved.”
Suzette smiled. “Maybe, I’ll find someone to save me, too.”
I shook my head. “Q didn’t save me—well, he did—but ultimately, he just showed me the way. He showed me I had the power to save myself. You have that power inside you, too. You just have to acknowledge it.”
Tears wobbled in my eyes, overwhelmed with all that’d happened. “Thank you, Suzette. For everything.” Our gaze connected; I poured forth every gratitude. “You helped me when I first arrived. You gave me clues about who Q really was. You’re so much stronger than me in so many ways. I know you’ll get there—because you helped me do the same.”
She continued to work on my curls. “You didn’t need me. You’re the strong one, Tess. But I’m so happy to have you in my life—happy to have a friend.” Her lips flitted into a sad smile. “And I do know what you mean. I sense it—inside. I’m getting there.”
One of the island staff came closer. She had a pretty face with thick eyelashes and a diamond pierced through her nose. “Shall I begin, ma’am?”
Suzette cleared her throat, dispelling our conversation. Her smile broadened, hiding the vulnerability in her eyes. “Yes. We don’t have much time.” Suzette pulled me backward, screeching the stool legs over the tiles, giving the girl room to kneel at my feet and place numerous tools, varnishes, and a foot spa beside me.
The other staff member came forward with a small trolley, setting up her station by my left side to tend to my fingernails.
“Wow, I’ve never been so pampered.” I sank my feet into the warm bath for my toes.
The women worked in soft silence, transforming me from a girl who’d killed yesterday into a pure princess today.
Never in my life had I bonded with girlfriends this way. I never owned nail varnishes or pretty things—my parents thought they were the devil’s tools. I’d never had a sleepover or done something drastic with my hair.
My smile fell for what I’d missed out on, but I stopped the thought.
It makes this all the more special. I was glad it was Suzette helping me get ready. It was fitting because she was my closest friend—living with us, looking after Q and me—family. She was family.
I drifted in girly bliss. “You do know you’re going to spoil me. I’ll never want to do my own hair or nails again.”
Suzette and the women giggled. “You’re supposed to be spoiled on your wedding day.” Suzette’s face scrunched in concentration, taking sections of my hair, pinning it in a haphazard way. “Besides, I’ve seen your capabilities with hairdressing and your version of tying it up is a boring ponytail.”
Only because I’d never had anyone show me how to style. I had a feeling my days of jumpers and jeans were behind me.
Slowly my tresses morphed from draping down my back to neatly secured in a loose chignon. I looked in the mirror, mesmerized as Suzette somehow preformed a miracle by making my hair stay up with no ties or over use of clips.
My fingernails were wet with Love’s First Kiss pink nail varnish and I reached carefully to pat the thick French-inspired up do.
Suzette swatted my hand away. “No touching. It’s up but a bit precarious, so be careful.”
I frowned, tilting my head to admire it. I looked sophisticated and demure. Not exactly how I would’ve done it, but I was eternally grateful for Suzette’s help. “I’ll be dancing and spending the day in high humidity. Doesn’t it need to stay up without ruining your masterpiece?”
Her lips curled into a smile. My heart stuttered at the flash of calculation in her eyes. What is she up to?
“It doesn’t have to be up for long. Besides, let me worry about all of that.” With that cryptic comment, she turned to grab the packages from the bed. “Thank you, ladies. I can take it from here.”
I stood, carefully stepping over the tiles, trying not to smudge my toenails. Suzette upended a bag onto the mattress.
My stomach flipped. Littered on the white bedspread, looking sinful and entirely too kinky, was black, lacy lingerie. But it didn’t stop there. Black stockings with a garter belt, a delicate bow stitched into the sheer material, along with a black leather corset with blood-red velvet ties.
My eyes flew to Suzette. “What is this?”
She glowed. “I figure you’re going to be the virgin bride, dressed all in white, but the moment Q takes it off—he’ll find his esclave again. Don’t you want to wear it for him?”
I picked up the boned corset, inspecting the intricate sparrows stitched into the leather. Tears pricked my eyes again at the direct symbolism that I was one of Q’s birds. The only one who stayed for him.
My heart winged thinking of tonight. I couldn’t wait to have him in bed again.
“It’s beyond beautiful. But won’t it show under the dress?”
Suzette shook her head. “No. Leave all the worrying to me. It’s time to get you ready. We don’t have much time.” Shoving the gown from my shoulders, she demanded, “Strip. I need to add concealer to any bruises you still have and dress you in an outfit that’ll make any master hard.”