Undead and Unappreciated

Chapter 3


Andrea Mercer and Daniel Harris were waiting for me in one of the parlors, and I was glad to see them. Not just because of the distraction. I really liked them.

Andrea was a vampire, like me, and a young one, also like me. She'd been killed on her twenty-first birthday, about six years ago, and was starting to get a handle on the thirst.

Daniel was her boyfriend, a regular guy and an outrageous flirt, and I got a real kick out of spending time with them. They were total opposites: she was serious and moody, and he was fun and irreverent. But you could tell they really loved each other. I thought that was pretty cool.

"Your Majesty," Andrea said, standing the minute she saw me. I waved her back down and sat down myself.

Daniel yawned and sprawled on the settee. He was a tall, blue-eyed, good-looking blond with the shoulders of a quarterback... put him in a horned helmet, and he'd be the spitting image of a marauding Viking. He didn't stand when I entered, which was refreshing. "Betsy, babe. You guys can't have meetings at a decent hour?"

"Bitch, bitch, bitch," I said good-naturedly. "What's up, you guys?"

"Thanks for seeing us," Andrea said.

"No, thank you." I mumbled. If not for them I'd still be smiling awkwardly at Sinclair and trying to figure out where to stuff the necklace.

"We'll get right to it, ma'am. Daniel asked me to marry him."

"What? Seriously? That's great! Congratulations!"

"Thanks." Andrea smiled and looked at the floor, then back up at me. "And the thing is, we'd like you to do it."

"Do what?" Get married? According to some, I already was married.

But not according to me. As happy as I was for Andrea, I was suddenly so jealous I was ready to spit on her Payless-clad toes. Why, why, why couldn't Sinclair have asked me to marry him? Why did he have to trick me? Why did he bring me presents instead of apologizing and trying to make things right? If he loved me, he had a crummy way of showing it. And if he didn't, why did he fix it so we were stuck together for the next thousand years?

"To marry us," Andrea was saying. Oops, better pay attention. "To perform the ceremony."

"Oh." This was a new one. As the queen, I could do all sorts of things other vampires couldn't do. Handle crosses, drink holy water, accessorize. But perform vampire wedding ceremonies? "Uh... I'm flattered but... can I do that?"

"Yes," Sinclair said from two feet behind me. I nearly fell off the couch. The guy couldn't make noise when he walked like anybody else, oh no. Six foot four and as noisy as a cotton ball. "As the sovereign, you can perform any ceremony you wish, including weddings."

"Oh. Jeez, you guys, I don't know what to say..."

"Say yes," Daniel said. "Because we can't get a priest. And Andy's got her heart set on you doing it, don't ask me why."

Andy (not that anybody else could get away with calling her that) nodded. "That's true."

"Which part?" I teased.

"All of it. Will you help us?"

"But..." But I didn't know how. But I wouldn't know what to say. But it would be really depressing for me to marry another couple, knowing I would never have a proper wedding. But it was ridiculous, having a secretary perform the wedding ceremony. "When's the big day?" I asked, surrendering.

They looked at each other, then back at me. "We figured we'd leave that up to you," Daniel said. "You know, with your busy queen schedule and all." Typical guy.

"When do you want to get married?" I asked her. She'd have picked out a date the second he proposed.

She hesitated for a second, glanced at Daniel, then said, "Halloween."

"Oh, cool!" And it would be. So cool. A Halloween wedding ceremony... with vampires! Plus, more than two weeks to figure out exactly what the heck I was supposed to do.

Daniel looked vaguely alarmed. Again, typical guy. "That's kind of quick, don't you think?"

"That's okay," I said, trying to catch Andrea's eye while she glared daggers at her beloved. "Yeah, okay, that'll work. Do you want to have it here?"

Again she hesitated, and again she glanced at Daniel, who shrugged and relaxed back on the couch. "If that wouldn't be too big an imposition, Your Majesty."

"It's no trouble. It's not like we don't have the space. Besides, we haven't had a decent party here in... ever." I started to cheer up a little, picturing myself in a severe black suit and pumps in maybe a dark purple. Or burnt orange, for the holiday? No, purple.

"Thank you so much," Andrea was saying-oops, they were leaving. All business, that was Andrea. Plus Daniel was still yawning. It couldn't be easy, adjusting to the undead's schedule. I used to waitress at a truck stop during graveyard shift (years before I knew what the graveyard shift really was), and no matter how much I slept during the day, I always wanted a nap around four a.m. "We'll be in touch."

"No problem," I replied, walking them to one of the house's sixty doors. "Talk to you soon. And congratulations again."

They said their good-byes, the door shut, and I turned to see Sinclair had followed me. "He asked her to marry him?" he asked, staring after them thoughtfully.

"Yeah," I replied. "You should try it sometime." Then I walked past him and marched up the stairs to my bedroom.
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