Alice in Zombieland

“Wait. Back up a bit. Are you and Frosty getting back together?” All that texting had to mean—



“No! Yes. Oh, I don’t know.” She threw herself on top of my bed, bouncing up and down. “I mean, I firmly believe that if a guy walks away from you, he should have to crawl back. Frosty hasn’t done enough crawling.”



I thought for a moment. “What if Cole was being truthful, and Frosty never actually cheated on you?” As rough as the guys were, I couldn’t imagine them lying about, well, anything. They wouldn’t care about consequences. What I could imagine was both of them getting in everyone’s face and saying, I did it. That’s right. Me.  What are you gonna do about it?



“Here’s a free life lesson for you. Boys always cover for other boys. They will lie to your face and behind your back.” After fluffing the pillows and finding a comfortable position, she said, “Now it’s your turn. Spill what happened today!”



As I paced in front of the bed, I told her that Cole and I had gone for a drive. That he’d asked me slashed commanded me to meet him at Reeve’s party for a non-date, and that I’d said yes. She listened, enraptured, as if I were proclaiming that the end of the world was near and there was only one way to save herself. I didn’t mention the forest, though, or the tree trap, or the visions. As Cole had said, those were private.



“He never goes to parties, especially for non-dates,” she said, gaping at me. “I think he really really likes you.”



“Really?” Okay. How pathetic was I? “Well, it doesn’t matter because I’m going with Justin Silverstone. As friends.”



A slow smile lifted the corner of her lips. “Justin. The same Justin who spoke to you at lunch?”



“Yes.”



“When did you two have time to hook up?”



“It wasn’t a hookup. We ride the same bus and started talking.”



“Oh, sweetie…I can’t wait…this is gonna be so epic, and even though you don’t know why and I won’t tell because that would spoil everything, you just made me the happiest girl in the world—and now, I’m gonna make you the second happiest. I’m taking you to spy on Cole.” Gleeful, she rubbed her hands together. “Life lesson number two. Spying is the best—and only—way to learn the truth.”



I’d been all set to interrogate her about Justin when my attention snagged on two words. Cole and spying. No way. Just no way. He’d catch us.



“I bet we’ll get to see him shirtless,” she said.



“I’m in,” I found myself saying.



“Awesome! Because we’re going tonight!”



In the dark? I almost yelped. “O-okay.”



“So enthused,” she said drily.



Too many things could go wrong. What if I saw the monsters out in public? How would I react? And then there was the tiny crossbow Cole had stashed in an ankle holster. Surprising him was so not a good idea.



“Maybe we should rethink this. I’m not sure—”



She popped to her feet and grabbed my hand. “Nope. No reneging. You’ll thank me for this. I promise.”



“But…”



“La la la la, can’t hear you.”



Emma sooo would have done that, and I kind of grunt laughed.



“Good girl,” she said, tugging me out of the room. “Now watch me work my magic.”



After dinner, I found myself strapped inside her girled-out pink Mustang and whizzing down the highway. Somehow, she’d convinced Nana and Pops to let me stay the night with her. This would be my first ever sleepover.



My chin quivered for a moment, and I had to swallow a few times, but I somehow stopped myself from crying. Emma had always wanted to attend a sleepover.



“Are you nervous?” Kat asked.



“Just a little.” If little was the new word for lot, of course. At least the rabbit was still a no-show.



“Why?”



Because I hadn’t been on an evening drive since the accident, and couldn’t help but clutch the seat, my stomach a writhing vomit bubble ready to burst. “Cars,” was all I said.



“Oh, yeah. Well, don’t worry because I’m the best driver you’ll ever meet. I swear to you now, hand to heart, that I’ve only had, like, three accidents and only two were my fault.”



Comforting.



“Cole’s had about a bazillion,” she added, “and you rode with him, right?”



“Right.” But I’d still felt safe…protected. Now? Not so much.



The sun was still out but going down fast, barely providing any light. But there was light, and this would be okay. At least, that was the mantra drumming through my head. Gradually, I relaxed.



“Where are we going?” I asked. “The game?”



“Nope. Cole never goes.”



“Then where?”



“A few things I noticed about our boys when I was dating Frosty. About once every two weeks, you can’t reach any of them. Whatever they’re doing, it’s violent and top secret.” There at the end her voice had taken on a sneering edge. “That was two days ago, which means they spent last night patching up their wounds. They’ll spend this one celebrating whatever secret thing they celebrate two days after disappearing and a day after healing. They’ll be at Hearts, the most exclusive club ever.”



I sat up a little straighter. Once every  two weeks. The same time frame I’d discovered for the monsters. It could be a coincidence, but…Cole had tried to tell me something about the tracks and traps today. He’d had injuries the night after I’d seen Bridezilla. We’d envisioned fighting the monsters together.



He had to see them in real life, too. He just had to.



“When the boys are missing,” I said, trying not to give in to excitement, “do you know where they go?”



“Nope, but like I said, they’re always beat-up the next day. Some of them even miss days or weeks of school afterward. Strange, if you ask me, but Dr. Wright never gives them any lip about it, so why should I?”



Another bead of evidence. The length of recovery time. Serious injuries from serious creatures. Were he and his friends actually seeking out and warring with those monsters?



If so…that would mean the monsters were real. That would mean my dad had been the sanest person at home. That would mean everything he’d ever said was true, and I had wrongly blamed him for his paranoia.



“I hope you’re excited because this club rocks!” Kat said. “Technically kids our age aren’t allowed in, but Cole and company always are. Probably has to do with their scariness factor. Anyway, Frosty had me put on the list, and because he secretly hopes I’ll do exactly this and spy on him, I’m just positive he hasn’t removed my name.”



Forget spying. I wanted to talk with Cole. Wanted to ask him questions about the monsters and the visions, gauge his reactions. He wouldn’t tell me outright, and I wouldn’t ask outright, but maybe I could trick him into spilling. Or, I don’t know, flirt until he couldn’t help himself. I looked down at my T-shirt and jeans. As I’d already learned, this outfit would not convince him to drop any secrets.



“Uh…Kat?”



“Don’t worry,” she said with a laugh, clearly knowing exactly what was bothering me. “We’re making a pit stop first. We’ll be smoking by the time we arrive at the club, you have my word.”



* * *



Smoking wasn’t the right term. Kat drove us to Reeve’s house and by the time Reeve finished with us, we were five-alarm blazing and should probably have been hosed down.



Apparently, Reeve had attended a school of beauty over the summer—which brought me to my next apparently. Apparently, Reeve was loaded.



She lived in a tall and sprawling mansion, with white columns, domed ceilings, chandeliers dripping with thousands of crystal teardrops, winding staircases and plush rugs with the most elaborate weave work. Out back was a pool as big as a football field. Oh, and there was an entirely separate section of the house where the servants lived.



Yeah. Servants.



Reeve dressed us in slutty, too-tight outfits and hooker heels. My “outfit,” or as I liked to call it, my Band-Aid, consisted of an ice-blue corset top, a micro-mini skirt with dark blue ruffles and ripped-up leggings. Black boots laced up to just under my knees.



With my pale skin, I’d never been one to wear makeup, but Reeve knew exactly what colors to apply to make my eyes pop, my cheeks appear rosy and my lips look like “plump candy apples all the boys will want to bite.” Her words, not mine.



Kat wore a long-sleeved top that veed all the way down to her navel, “forcing” her to ditch her bra. At least her legs were covered by a pair of skinny jeans, the lucky girl. Rather than jewelry, Reeve had given her a boy’s necktie that would play hide-and-seek with her chest.



Reeve dressed in a black-and-white polka-dot dress that flared at the hips and ended at the knees. She reminded me of a sexy seventies housewife.



Sometime during my transformation, Wren and Poppy arrived.



“I can’t believe we’re ditching the game for this,” Poppy said, gorgeous in a tank top, jean shorts and cowgirl boots.



“Better to support our friends than our team,” Wren said, “as long as you swear we’re not going to the club so that Ali can hook up with Cole and his gang of societal sores.”



Kat held up her hand, palm out. “Swear.”



As Poppy studied herself in the full-length mirror, she said, “Societal sores? Yes, they are losers, but is the witchiness really necessary, Wren?”



“I’m not a witch!” Wren said with a stomp of her foot.



“Are, too. The guy at Starbucks hit on me, not you, and you’re lashing out.”



“He totally hit on me.”



“Did not.”



“Did too!”



They continued to argue as we walked to Reeve’s SUV. Night was in full swing, casting shadows over the house and driveway. Porch lights offered the occasional safe haven, and kept me going. Fear would not control me tonight, though. I wouldn’t let it. Tonight was too important, my mission too critical.