My eyes clasped shut. The tears were there, they wanted to cascade out, but I couldn’t let them. It’d be over if I did. I’d been holding everything in so well until then. I couldn’t let it happen now. Not now.

But my hand grasped her arm and I held on tight. I didn’t want to move away, not in this lifetime.

CHAPTER TWELVE

My stomach was in knots the entire time in the plane, so when we landed in Vegas, I was barely able to stomach the idea of food. Angie and Justin suggested food, but I shook my head and they grabbed something on the way from a food cart. It didn’t take long to get our bags and then we were in the taxi and headed towards Marissa’s hotel. As we got closer to the Tropicana, my heart was pumping louder and louder. I couldn’t believe Angie or Justin hadn’t heard it.

When the taxi got to the hotel and we walked into the lobby, Marissa and Eric were waiting for us. She jumped up and down, waving her hand. As she lifted her arm each time, her white dress inched down a centimeter with each wave. As we started in their direction, she grabbed Eric’s hand and dragged him towards us. We were met halfway. Marissa kept bouncing up and down, hugging each of us. When all of us had been greeted, she repeated the process and repeated it again.

“You’re here! You’re here.” Marissa clapped. “Yay, yay!”

Eric looked green around his mouth. He held a hand to his stomach, but tried for a smile. “Hey, guys.”

Angie’s eyebrows went high. “And she’s drunk.”

Justin chuckled and clapped a hand on Eric’s shoulder. “Been drinking since you got here?”

He nodded, and gulped for breath. His cheeks swelled suddenly.

Justin’s laugh grew in volume. He swatted him once again. “Yep, sounds like Marissa’s influence has done its job. Good job.”

Eric jerked forward, clapped a hand over his mouth, paled, and then fled down a hallway.

“Honey!” Marissa followed after him, with clumsier movements.

“Hey! What about us?”

“Oh.” She put the brakes on and skidded back. A key card was flung at us from her purse before she turned back around. “You’re all in room 5214, right next to us. You’re checked in and everything. I’ll come over in a bit.”

“All of us?”

A distracted wave was her response.

Angie sighed in disgust. “I can’t believe she did that. We should’ve gotten a suite with three separate rooms. That would be less awkward then.”

“Uh…” Justin glanced at me from the corner of his eye. “Um, honey. We’ll be fine. It’s no problem.”

“No problem?” she seethed. “This is all Marissa’s fault. She called us at the last minute and demanded we all do this, and then she doesn’t think things through. Honey, we’re in Vegas and we can’t—”

Then she stopped and turned to me. Horrified.

The knots in my stomach had dropped like stones, but I swallowed my pride and shrugged. “It’s fine. I can get my own room somewhere.”

“Oh, my God. I am so sorry, Alex. I didn’t mean—” She balled up her fists and pressed them to her forehead. “None of this is going the right way. I can’t believe I said it like that. I’m really sorry, Alex. I really am. I’m mad at Marissa, not you, never you.”

But, I was the problem. And she knew that I knew that. A deep guilt started to settle in when Justin threw his arms around us both and pulled us tight. He squeezed us together and said in a cheerful tone, “No worries, Alex. Me and Ang can have daytime sex if you’re not around.”

“Justin!”

He grinned at me as he was swatted in the back of his head. “I prefer sex during the day anyway, so you’re kind of helping me out here.”

“Shut up, Justin.”

But he hugged us tighter and turned both of us towards the hallway. “Come on, ladies. Let’s go find our room.”

Angie glared at him. “I’m going to make you pay for this, you know.”

“Yeah, but that’s another reason why having Alex around is a good idea for me. You can’t fillet my ass.”

She opened her mouth, ready for another seething retort, but then she jerked in the air and gasped. She whirled around, red in the face and eyes, as a hand reached around to her butt. Her mouth opened and closed like a goldfish’s for a second and then the scathing look intensified. “You pinched my ass!”

Justin hooted before he burst ahead of us down the hallway.

“Justin!”

He waved the card in the air. “Good luck getting into the room. I’ve got the key.”

“AH!” And she took off after him.

I stayed back and watched as the two chased each other down the hallway. Justin was giggling, Angie was growling, but right before she turned the corner, I saw the smile on her face as well. I sighed on the inside. They were in love. They had been for such a long time.

I wanted that. I did, but then an old feeling inside of me triggered again.

People didn’t find the love they had. Not really. And if they did, they were lucky, incredibly so.

With that thought, I knew I had to get my own room. I was the fifth wheel on this trip. When I went back to the front desk, a worker told me that there were no empty rooms. I needed to have a reservation at least a few weeks in advance. After she told me all this, with a blank expression on her face, I wondered if Marissa had booked two rooms from the beginning.