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Trystan went through the rest of the day looking for Mari. She wasn't at her locker at the usual times, and she seemed to alter her normal path through the hallways. Was she avoiding him? Trystan instantly knew why - that kiss. He shouldn't have kissed her. At the time, he didn't think it upset her, but it must have. There was no other explanation as to why she was avoiding him.
Trystan went into Tucker's room during his free period. "I'm here." His voice was distant, distracted. He wanted to find Mari and fix things.
Tucker glanced up from under an overgrown monobrow. He pointed at the first desk in front of him, "Sit." Tucker didn't bother to watch Trystan find his seat, instead he went back to the stack of papers in front of him. When he finished marking up the one he was working on, he lifted it and put them into a folder, leaving the pile of papers out on his desk.
"Want to tell me what's going on?" Tucker asked. He walked in front of the desk and stopped in front of Trystan.
Trystan stared straight ahead, "I threw an apple core and got busted." Glancing up, he said smirking, "I believe you were there. It was a pretty good throw. Crossed the room and sailed straight into the center of the can."
"Scott, you threw it when I walked in. Did you really think I'd let it go? This little cry for help?"
Trystan straightened in his chair and looked directly in his teacher's face, "What? That wasn't a cry for help. It was piss poor timing."
Tucker's head tilted to the side. He folded his massive arms across his chest, "Yeah, right. And I'm the Toothfairy. Listen Scott, if you're in trouble there are people who can help. I know your dad - "
Trystan shot out of his chair. "You don't know shit about my dad, so don't try your pschyobabble on me." Some emotion he couldn't identify reached out and crushed his gut. After a second he realized it was fear mingling with shame. If people knew the beatings he'd taken, he'd die. Trystan was stronger than his dad but he never fought back. He took his punches. Maybe it was some distorted sense of reality. Maybe he just wanted a father like everyone else had, someone who watched over him and played ball on the weekends. Instead he got the drunk mess, the shell of what used to be a great man.
"Trystan," Tucker said, turning toward him as Trystan made a bee line for the door.
But Trystan didn't stop. No one could know. And Tucker was wrong. No one could save him. That was one fact he knew for certain. The last person who tried - shaking his head, he pushed the thought aside. He didn't want to think about it. His life was what he made it. As soon as Trystan crossed the stage at graduation and got his diploma, he was out of here.
But Mari, a voice said in the back of his head.
The jaded part of Trystan silently responded, If Mari doesn't come around by then, she never will.
Chapter 11
~MARI~
After school Trystan found me sitting alone in the theater, waiting for practice to start. I avoided him all day, and he noticed. "You weren't at your locker." It was a statement, but there was a question in his voice.
I shrugged, like it was normal. I had my math book open on my lap. "Just trying to finish some homework."
A lopsided grin lined his lips. Great. I knew that expression. He knew I was lying. Damn it. When did he get to know me so well?
"Mari, at least tell me what I did."
"You didn't do anything," I said, without looking up, starting another equation. He took the book from my lap and closed it quietly. When I looked up at him, he took my notebook and my pencil, too.
"I know you. Something's bothering you."
I was impaled on his gaze as soon as I looked up. It darted through me, and I couldn't look away. His eyes searched my face and I felt naked. Somehow he'd learned to read me. Two years of running lines had taught him too much. I looked away before he saw how I felt about him. I sighed and threw my head back like I was annoyed. "Trystan, I'm not mad at you, but I will be if you don't give me back my stuff."
He took the pile of books off his lap and held them out over the aisle. Watching me, he dropped them on the floor. The pencil rolled away as the slap of the books echoed through the empty auditorium. I jumped up to push past him, but he blocked me. Trystan was a full head higher than me. I couldn't look at his face, those eyes would make me say stupid things. Instead I stared at his chest and the black tee shirt that clung to him.
Trystan tensed. I could feel his gaze on my face. "It was the kiss, wasn't it?"
I lifted my eyes and when I met his I knew I was screwed. I felt the truth about to tumble out of my mouth, but I bit it back. Pushing my curls out of my face I shook my head, "No, of course not. It didn't mean anything. Besides, you kiss everyone." The expression on his face faltered when I said it and I instantly regretted my words. He looked like I kicked him in the stomach.
But, Trystan recovered quickly. Nodding he said, "Sometimes. Mostly girls." He grinned to cover the effect of my words. "Still, I shouldn't have done it. I know how you feel about that stuff, and I just got caught up in the moment." He pushed his hands into his pockets, and looked up at me. His eyes were so blue.
I tore my gaze away, "It's fine." I tried to ignore the fact that my ribs felt like they were going to crack. My heart raced when he looked at me like that, making my pulse pound like I'd been running. I wanted to turn away, but I couldn't. My arms folded against my chest.
Trystan watched me do it. Then he reached out and touched my forearm, gently brushing my skin with his fingers. He had to know how crazy he was making me. That had to be the reason why he did it. Smiling, he looked up into my face and said, "I wanted to tell you something. Every time we get a second, someone comes and drags you away. Listen - " he swallowed hard, his dark lashes lowering. He paused like he can't figure out how to convey what he wanted to say. When he looked back up into my eyes, I felt like I couldn't breathe. The sensation of his palm on my arm, the way he looked at me, made me want to throw my arms around his neck, but I couldn't. The only actual thought registering in my mind at that moment was that Katie's going to kill me.