Conflicted Love

I couldn’t even process that cocky statement seeing as I was in a fully-fledged lust coma so I just sat there panting and watching his retreating form. I gripped the sofa so as not to race after him and have him make good on his threat.



Trip



Fucksake!



Teeny was seriously pushing my buttons. I’d had constant wood since she moved in, and I meant constant. Stripping down and jumping into the shower, I mumbled to myself, “Freakin’ woman.” The hot water running over my sore muscles, I replayed what I was sure had to be purposeful punishment over the last week.



Day one: she walked around in tiny short shorts and a barely-there tank top that showed her lacey red bra underneath. This inadvertently made me kick my bare toe on the coffee table when she’d bent over.



Day two: I came in from work to find her asleep on the couch in a pair of shorter shorts that very well could have passed for panties and another torturous singlet top that had her boobs spilling out.



Day three: I woke up from a wet dream. Yes. A wet fucking dream like some teenage boy who’d just discovered his first peek at a Playboy magazine.



Day four: …well, you get the point. I hadn’t beat the meat this much since I’d figured out what it was for. I was ninety-percent sure I was forming blisters and I was ready to take out shares in the world’s largest lotion company. I needed to be inside her again before I lost my ever-loving mind. From the moment I’d first gotten Teeny under me, I’d lost interest in all other women. If my dick wasn’t constantly standing to attention when she was around, I’d start thinking it was broken. She’d ruined me; it was finally time I laid it all on the line. Yep, I was gonna man the fuck up and get the girl.



But first, I had a problem to sort out.



Teeny



As I got to the bathroom door, I open my mouth to call out and let him know I was making dinner, but stopped dead. The door was slightly ajar and I could see a very sculptured back, strong long legs and a perfect ass. One arm was bent on the wall leaning his head against it, while his other arm moved back-and-forth in a slow rhythm. I opened my mouth to take a deep breath and choked on my tongue.



Oh, sweet baby Jesus! He was jacking off.



Being as quiet as I possibly could, I took a step back, my face flushed and nipples instantly hard against my shirt.



“Mmmm.” His low throaty groan sent a pool of heat to my poor neglected nether regions. I looked around quickly, because you know, there might have been another creeper watching my roommate and baby daddy whacking it in the shower and all.



His hiss drew my attention back to what he was doing. Squeezing my thighs together and trying to ease the ache, I stood staring at him. The pumping of his arm, the muscles in his ass moving with every other stroke strengthened my ache. My breathing picked up speed and my body started to tingle.



I was on the verge of spontaneous combustion. My entire body was warming. Holding in a groan of my own, I took a tentative step forward watching his body move under the stream of water. Quietly and carefully, I slid my hand down my chest palming my aching breasts and pinched one very sensitive nipple. This was so wrong and so dirty, but I was so turned on I couldn’t stand it anymore.



I closed my eyes for a moment. “You like watching me, Princess?” His rough, sexy voice made me squeak in fright; my busy hand shot up to my mouth and my face flamed bright red.



Busted.



Standing millimeters in front of me, completely naked and dripping water stood a very hard, very sexy Trip.



Planting his lips on mine, he pulled me forward into his wet chest. Flicking his tongue out to lick my lower lip, he then slid it in my slightly parted mouth.



Okay, pull away. Pull away, now. Pulling away. No, don't push into him! Loosen the kiss! Not deepen it!



My arms came up to his neck. My hands gripped his hair on their own accord. Holding onto him for dear life, my fear and pride faded into the background and my mind became all too clear. If it were okay to have a sexual relationship with anyone, it would be with the father of my baby, right? And why shouldn't I have sex with him? What’s the worst that could happen? I can’t get pregnant times two! Right?



Trip opened his mouth a few times, clearly unable to get out what he wanted to say. “I want you,” he finally whispered.



After looking at each other for a long while, I nodded and whispered back, “Okay.”



He picked me up off the ground and carried me back to his room. Laying me down gently on the bed, he proceeded to devour me with a gentleness I didn’t know he possessed.



Afterward, sweaty and tangled up together in bed, Trip hid his face in my neck and mumbled something incoherent. “I can’t hear you while your face is in the pillow.”



Pulling back, he nervously asked, "So...can we do this? Again, I mean? Because I don't know how I'm going to keep you around without becoming a walking hard-on, Princess. My balls are gonna fall off soon; they’re that blue and I think I have a blister." He held up his palm to show me; there was absolutely nothing wrong with his hand.



Tension broken, I laughed, "I—I guess. I mean, we're not hurting anyone, right?"



Except myself.



My smile faded at the thought of Trip ripping me apart. Protecting my heart, I stipulated, "But this doesn't mean we're exclusive."



Trip’s entire body went stiff as a board; the anger radiated off him. "What do you mean we're not exclusive?"



"You can still fuck who you want, and I can still sleep with whoever I want to, but we gotta be safe. Nothing unprotected and we don’t bring them home," I clarified knowing full well that I was not okay with Trip fucking someone else, and by his reaction, knew he wasn’t okay with me fucking someone else either.



I took a small piece of comfort in that knowledge, but pushed the issue so much that he gave in.



My plan was to not only keep my own walls up, but push Trip into finding an infatuation with somebody else. I was certain I had just signed over permission for him to break me. I just had to hope I could pick myself up afterward.



Chapter Nine



Trip



Hours after she fell asleep pulled tight to me in my bed, I lay there feeling more conflicted than I ever believed possible. I’d never felt this way before. I’d never wanted this. I wasn’t even completely sure what this was. A few things I did know though were that I was slowly chipping Teeny’s protective layers away. The idea of her laying like this in somebody else’s arms, some other fucker touching her, didn’t bode well. In fact, it clear pissed me way the fuck off, and if I was being completely honest with myself, I couldn’t imagine banging anybody but her. I couldn’t see anything past her.



All of this brought me to one obvious conclusion.



I’m as good as fucked.



Chapter Ten



Teeny



Four weeks later…



“Hey, tart,” Scarlett said closing the front door behind her.



“In here,” I called out letting her know I was in the kitchen. I shoved the barbecued pork ribs back in the oven and turned around to give her a peck on the cheek. “The guys left yet?” I asked pulling out a cold beer and sliding it into her waiting hand. I then snagged an orange juice for myself.



“Yeah, they left about ten minutes ago,” she said after downing half of her beer. The girl could drink. In fact, she’d drunk the guys under the table on more than one occasion.



“The girls will be here in a few minutes, but seeing as I have you all to myself, I wanted to ask you something,” Scarlett piped up looking a little unsure, which was odd and so unlike Scarlett.



Licking my lips, I braced myself for questions about Trip and me. We’d been seeing each other for about two weeks. Although Scarlett knew all the details, I had been waiting for her to put her two-cents worth out there. “Shoot,” I said leaning back against the kitchen counter.



“Well, I’m getting married.” I snorted and didn’t bother pointing out that I was quite aware she was getting hitched, seeing as this was her bachelorette party and I’d been helping plan the entire thing for months. “I’m also going to be on my honeymoon.” She was stalling, which meant whatever she had to say must be important for her to be pussyfooting around. Nodding my head, I gestured for her to keep going, a little more at ease that I hadn’t just landed myself in a Scar-type lecture. “I wanted to ask you if, I mean, you can say no and I won’t be offended but—“ she took a big breath and rushed out, “willyouworkforme?” Her cringe made me laugh out loud. It figured she’d be worried about asking me. Six weeks ago, I would have glared at her and told her I didn’t want her handouts. I had been slowly working on lowering my pride and accepting a little help without snapping about being a charity case. Maybe I was getting soft or maybe I’d just come to realize the people around me genuinely cared about me and just wanted to help me out.



The hilarity of the wary look on her face and the way she was gripping the bottle in her hand had me laughing louder. She was waiting for a fight that wasn’t going to happen. “What is it you want me to do? You know I’m not licensed to ink.”



“You can be though! I don’t know why you never came back,” she said quietly with regret shining in her eyes.



I had been about two-months shy of completing my apprenticeship when I quit to take care of my mother during her last breakdown. Scarlett supported my decision knowing how hard it was to take care of the woman who’d looked at you like a disease for most of your life; however, she’d always encouraged me to go back and I never had.



Don’t ask me why I continued putting it off. Maybe it was me listening to my mom and the millions of times she’d told me I’d be nothing but a waste of space. A nobody.



I’ll admit I was a pussy. A scared little bitch.



Mindlessly rubbing my hand over my swelling belly, I smiled and made a decision that I should have made years before. “You know what, I might just do that.” With one simple sentence and small choice made, I felt giddy at the possibilities. This might just be the second best decision I’d made recently. I’d made the first best decision walking out of the doctor’s office knowing I was going to be a mom and not fighting it.



“‘Bout fucking time, bitch!” Scarlet all but whooped, smiled and breathed out hard. “I thought I was gonna get my head taken off for that. When can you start?”



“Wait, how am I going to finish my apprenticeship with you away?” I asked confused, and then it dawned on me. “Trip?” A million excuses ran through my head.



Could I spend all that time with him? Could I have him instruct me without me biting his head off? Unlikely. An idea struck. “What about Remy?” Yeah, that’d work. “Remy can do it, right?” Please, please, please, I mentally chanted to myself hoping I didn’t have to spend that much one-on-one with Trip. He was already breaking down my carefully erected barbed wire fence.



Regardless of the non-exclusive stipulation I’d put on us, he was home every day right after work, and taking me out on weekends or hanging around when I was tired. We were fast becoming a very real something. If it kept going the way it was, I was liable to screw everything up and fall in love with the big ape.