Conflicted Love

“No.” Plain, simple. My give–a-fuck button was broken, and would be for at least six more hours.



“What the fuck’s your problem?” he snapped. “Why you gotta be all queen bitch? Every fuckin’ time you get pissed it falls on me.”



“Excuse me?” My body stiffened. Mad was an understatement. I was about to blow my top. “How fucking dare you!” I spun around and glared at him.



“Me? You go around actin’ like I’ve done some horrible fuckin’ thing to you, and half the time I have no damn clue what’s up your ass!”



“You have to be the stupidest motherfucker I’ve ever met! Calling me out at a ridiculous time of the night to come get your drunk ass. I get my very tired self out of bed and do just that so you can be a prick. Go back to your tramps, Trip. I’ve had e-fucking-nough of this crap.” I poked at his half-exposed chest. “You called me to a fuck-fest party with dirty creeps!”



His eyes flared and he took a step forward getting into my personal space “They weren’t my anything. I called you to see if you’d come and you did.”



“You what?” Oh, hell no! “My back hurts. My feet hurt. I’m damn near exhausted and you were what? Trying to prove I’d run around after you?” I yelled.



“I was proving a point. You keep telling me you don’t give two shits about me, yet here you are. Coming to my rescue at the drop of a hat,” he smirked and I had to fight off the intense urge to slap his perfect face.



“Oh, screw you, asshole. You think you have it all figured out, don’t you?” I yelled louder.



“You want me, Princess, and you just can’t help it.” The corner of his mouth tipped up as he continued, “You came in and saw those bitches all over me and you couldn’t help it. You. Were. Jealous.” He took a step forward with every word backing me up against the wall.



“Don’t flatter yourself. I was disgusted. Not jealous,” I sneered in his face.



He pulled his bottom lip between his teeth taking the twin piercings with it. “Princess, you want this as much as I do.” One more step forward, one hand moved to the wall beside me the other to my hip as he pulled himself against my body. “Don’t think I don’t know why you colored your hair either. You look fucking hot as a brunette. And it didn’t turn me off in the least. Your plan failed.” He leaned his face forward slightly with a twinkle in his eye daring me to deny why I’d done it, daring me to call him out on why he hadn’t mentioned it earlier. “Quit fighting it.”



“I hate you,” I threw out with very little venom and no real truth behind it. “Stop smiling.” I pushed at his chest, but he didn’t move an inch.



Studying my face for only a second, he slammed his mouth down on mine and kissed me hard; the metal in his lip pressed into mine and his hard length pressed to my stomach twitched beneath his jeans. A gasp left my mouth allowing his tongue to dive in.



My hormones went crazy. My brain short-circuited, and before I knew it, I was tearing the last shreds of his shirt from his body and throwing it to the floor. Trip growled against my mouth, reached down, gripped my ass and lifted me off the ground. My legs instantly wrapped around his waist. He stalked off toward his bedroom tearing a moan from me as the pressure of his hard-on rubbed against my clit and shot sparks off though my body.



“Hope to hell you’re ready, Princess.” He dropped me down on the bed pushing my skirt up and tearing my lacey boy-shorts off in one quick movement.



My already hard nipples pulled tight against my soft shirt, and before I knew it, his mouth was on me. “Holy shit!” I cried out at the intense feeling of his tongue and the tiny metal ball in it flicking just right on my clit. “Ohhhhh, yes, fuck yes!” I screamed as he pushed two thick fingers in fast and deep. I fisted the sheets and held on tight.



Before I could take another breath, he bit down gently on my clit, sucked it into his mouth sending me careening into an orgasm that had me shaking and screaming at the top of my lungs. “Holy shit, Trip! Don’t stop!” He pumped his fingers harder and faster, nibbling, licking and sucking until I was a boneless panting mess.



“Taste as good as I remember.” I watched as his licked his fingers clean while pumping his rock hard cock in his other hand. Licking my lips, I was almost drooling at the sight of him with his pants undone and hanging off his hips. The silver bar that ran through the top of his angry-looking dick made my pussy twitch just remembering how good that was going to feel.



Trip leaned forward so I was lying on the bed before he grabbed both my ankles pulling me forward. Hooking his arms under my knees, he slammed home. My long moan matched his deep throaty groan as he gripped my hips hard, pulled back and drove in balls deep again. Picking up a brutal pace, he smashed into me his pelvis hitting against my clit with every punishing movement of his hips.



“God, oh God,” I whimpered digging my nails into his muscled ass. His answering growl was all it took for me to let go again. My body tightened up, the waves crashing over me like nothing I’d ever felt before.



“Gotta come in you, Princess. Gotta come hard.” His cock twitched, and with another hard and fast pump, he threw his head back and shouted his release. I loosened my grip on him and the post orgasm fog started to slowly lift.



Leaning over the top of me with his arms bracing his weight, the moment and its seriousness started to sink in. What did we just do? How could I have let this happen? Again.



Because you’re in love with him, you idiot.



Oh, this is a bad idea. A very bad idea.



Chapter Fifteen



Trip



“Don’t. You’re overthinking shit. Just don’t,” I whispered. Her body had gone still and I knew she was coming up with all her bullshit reasons why we were a bad idea…why I wasn’t good enough.



“Don’t make this a big deal,” she told me as I got up, pulled my jeans back up my hips and went to the bathroom to clean up.



“It is a big fuckin’ deal,” I snapped. I’d about had enough of her run-around routine. I stormed back into the bedroom to find her slipping one of my shirts over her head.



“It doesn’t have to be. Just let it go,” she mumbled looking around for her discarded clothes. “It was probably just crazy hormones and the heat of the moment. Forget it.”



Was she freaking kidding me? Same old shit different day. Teeny ran from anything that might get under that tough exterior she was wearing around her like armor. I moved around the room trying to tramp down the urge to shake some sense into her. Seething, I threw a fresh shirt and new beanie on. Forget calming myself. I was way beyond that point now.



Blocking the doorway and her hasty escape, I grabbed her arms and leaned in close. “Stop running away! Act like a fucking grown up for once,” I demanded.



“Don’t you dare tell me what to do! Don’t patronize me. And get the hell out of my way!” she yelled shoving at my chest.



“Stop!” I barked. “Just hear me out.”



“What the fuck for, Trip?” Taking a deep breath, she glared, “So you can have an easy piece on the side?”



Dumbfounded that she’d even think that after the shit I’d gone through to show her I wanted her—just her— I needed to take action. I might have gone about it ass about face, but she’d left me no choice but to do whatever I could to get a reaction.



“What do you want from me?” she screamed clearly having lost her cool as well.



"For shit's sake, Teeny, I'm in fucking love with you!" I yelled pulling my beanie off and fisting it.



My throat burned an uncomfortable and alien feeling. My voice softened when I looked into her disbelieving eyes, "I'm in love with you and I don't know what to do about it."



Two tears fell from her eyes and trailed her cheeks. She looked away quickly. The breath in my lungs stuttered. Fuck. She didn't give a fuck. I laid it all out and she didn't care. I'd got my answer.



I pulled my keys from my pocket and left closing the door quietly behind me. Not looking back. I felt completely broken and plain tired.



The harsh rain started almost the exact time. I’d pulled my heart out of my chest and handed it over on a silver platter. The rain stung my face as I rode across town to the lookout. It was the spot I came when I needed time to think, room to breathe or just when everything was turning to shit.



And everything had just turned to shit.



Pulling over to the side, I turned my bike off, threw my leg over and grabbed the bottle of whiskey I’d stopped for. I ripped my helmet from my head and tossed it to the side. Thankfully, I’d left my jacket on my bike the last time I’d gone for a ride; otherwise, I’d be freezing my ass off. As it was, the worn black leather wasn’t offering as much shelter from the rain as I would have liked.



But it didn’t matter. I was numb.



I sat on the very edge of the lookout staring into the darkness and city lights.



So, this was what rejection felt like.



I’d never experienced it before. This tightness in my chest, the sick feeling in the pit of my stomach, the lump in my throat, it was all new to me.



I unscrewed the lid from my poison of choice and lifted the bottle to my lips, tipped it back and swallowed hard. The burn that rushed down my throat and warmed my stomach did nothing to ease the pain of losing the one woman I ever loved.



Love fucking sucked.



Looking down at the still almost full bottle in my hands, I wondered what I was supposed to do next; she’d rejected me. Flat out looked right at me, reached into my chest and ripped my heart out. Pulling my arm back, I threw the bottle against the rocks below me. Shattering into a million tiny pieces, I left it the same way my insides felt.



I don’t know how long I sat there in the cold night staring into space. A thousand words swirled through my head, countless emotions I never even knew I possessed tearing through my soul. It must have been a while because the dark sky started to lighten with the dawn; my body was still numb from the cold rain that had pounded down on me. I was soaking wet and no doubt looking as shitty as I felt.



Climbing onto my bike, I started her up and took a moment to tamp down some of the heartache. Heading toward home to get a quick shower, I stopped at the intersection and put my feet to the ground steadying myself; lights hit my tired face moments before a screech of tires and sounds of metal on metal pierced my senses. As if in slow motion, my fingers were ripped from the handlebars and I flew through the air landing on the wet bitumen with a sickening thud. My vision went blurry and I couldn’t feel anything except the excruciating pain radiating through my head. I attempted to lift my hand to it, but all that happened was a foggy feeling and a heavy weight in my limbs.



A clear vision of Teeny and her swollen belly flashed through my mind before everything went black.



Chapter Sixteen



Teeny



Pacing the living room, I glanced over at the clock again. My stomach clenched for what would probably be the hundredth time that day.



1:49 in the morning.



He’d been gone for almost twenty-four hours. This wasn’t like Trip. But then again, he was under the assumption he’d just been rejected. I could see the pain crystal clear in his eyes. I had unintentionally ripped his heart out. After I snapped out of my shocked state, it’d been too late; Trip had already taken off on his bike.