It was the coldest water I’d ever been in, and my entire body screamed in protest. The lake was dark and silty, but my eyes adjusted quickly. I followed the hose down, passing ten feet and realizing that the lake was much deeper than they’d thought. Then I saw Ceren’s hair, waving in the current like a sea fan.

His eyes had rolled back in his head. He was unconscious, but I had no way of knowing if he’d been out for many minutes or one. One of his feet was untied from its weight, but the knot on his other foot was stuck. He must have realized he was running out of air and been unable to free himself. I pulled on his foot with all my strength until it tore free of the weight, then yanked the hose from his mouth and started to haul him upward. My feet were already numb, and for a minute I wasn’t sure I had the strength to get us both back to the surface.

I could let go of Ceren now and easily return to shore. I owed him nothing. He was cruel and selfish. He’d admitted I was nothing to him but a body, just like Mother said. But the truth was that I’d been under less than two minutes. There was no danger for me, not yet. And I had been raised to believe that letting someone die was tantamount to killing him myself.

I broke the surface and gulped in air, Ceren bobbing up next to me a moment later. I hooked one arm around his chest and began to push toward shore with the other. Talin and several guards had waded into the shallows, and while the guards took over and hauled Ceren onto dry land, Talin scooped me out of the water, sodden as I was, and carried me to the soft grass on the bank.

“Are you all right?” he asked, pushing my wet hair out of my face. “You were under for so long.”

“I’m fine,” I panted. “I need to help your brother.”

“Help him?” Talin echoed incredulously. “He’s gone. He was under for nearly fourteen minutes.”

I crawled over to where Ceren was, cursing my wet clothing, and bent above him to listen for breathing. I didn’t hear anything, and his chest wasn’t moving, so I pressed my fingers to his neck. Once more, it crossed my mind that I could do nothing. If he wasn’t dead already, he would be soon.

I glanced over at the page, watching me with wide hazel eyes. He gave the smallest shake of his head, and I knew then for certain he had stepped on the hose, cutting off Ceren’s air. Had Lady Melina put him up to this, or was this revenge for his older brother? Perhaps it was both.

And then I felt it. A tiny stutter of a heartbeat, and that was all it took. I pinched his nose, ignoring the gray cast to his skin and blue lips, and began to blow air into his mouth. Several of the guards gasped. They had never seen anyone resuscitated this way before. I’d never had to perform the procedure myself, but all Varenian children were trained in how to do it. I’d seen it several times, when fishermen got the cramps in their joints that could signal death, and once when a baby had fallen off a dock in Varenia and nearly drowned. I continued to blow into his mouth every five seconds, watching his chest carefully. After a minute had passed, I began to lose hope.

Suddenly, Ceren’s muscles tensed and his eyes flew open. I moved away just before he vomited. A combination of water and whatever he’d eaten for breakfast bubbled up through his lips, and I quickly rolled him onto his side to help clear his airway. I wiped at his mouth with the hem of my undergarment and rolled him back when he’d finished. A hint of color was already returning to his lips and cheeks.

I couldn’t help myself. I smiled. Whatever happened next, a man was alive because of me. “Get Prince Ceren a blanket!” I yelled at whoever would listen.

Ceren looked up at me, his eyes lit by the sun so that they were no longer gray, but closer to the iridescent scales of a silver moonfish. He tried to sit up, but I pressed him down gently. “You need to rest.”

He glanced down at his body, and for the first time I became aware of his naked torso, his long limbs and the blue map of veins beneath his pale skin. He was muscular, but so thin I could count every rib as he heaved for air.

I looked back into his eyes just as Grig threw one of the fur throws from the carriage over Ceren’s body, and I was surprised by what I saw there: shame, humiliation, but also surprise. Talin had said Ceren pushed people away to test their loyalty. Perhaps I had proven mine today.

“Thank you,” he said, taking my hand in his. “I owe you my life.”

* * *

Captain Osius helped Ceren, who was only semiconscious, into the carriage while the other guards mounted their horses.

“We’ll escort you back to the castle,” Talin said to me as he handed me another throw. “But we should get you changed first.” He made a valiant effort not to look below my neck as he pulled the blanket tight around my shoulders.

“I’m fine. I should be with Prince Ceren.”

“Osius will stay with him. There’s only room for two people in the carriage, and you’ve done more than your share for my brother today.”

“Then how will I get back?” I asked.

“You’ll ride with me.”

I raised my eyebrows. “Do you think that’s a good idea?”

“Don’t worry, my lady. My men are discreet. Right now I’m far more concerned that you’ll catch cold in those wet clothes.”

“Why, do you have a spare gown lying around?” I said with a smirk.

“Perhaps if you remove your... Your gown is still dry, my lady.”

I was too delighted by his discomfort to be ashamed when he offered to hold the blanket up for me so I could change. When I’d finished, I pulled my hair over my shoulder and presented my back to him.

“Can you help me with the buttons?”

There was no response. I glanced over my shoulder to find Talin blushing as pink as a cooked shrimp.

“I wasn’t permitted to bring my lady’s maid,” I said, suppressing a giggle. “I could ask one of your men to help me, if you prefer.”

He released his breath, and the warm air on my bare skin sent a shiver down my spine. “You’re cold,” he said, as if that gave him the permission he needed.

His fingers fumbled against the small of my back as he struggled with the tiny loops on the gown, and I felt a sudden wave of gratitude for all those stupid buttons. After a few failed attempts, he seemed to get the hang of it, stepping closer to me as his fingers climbed up my back to my shoulder blades. Without my undergarments, there was nothing between his hands and my flesh, and I felt every brush of skin on skin like a flame licking from my back down to my core.

“Thank you,” he said softly as he finished the last button, his fingers still lingering on my nape. It took all my willpower not to press back into him, but I tilted my head, exposing more of my neck to his warm breath, relishing the way the small hairs there stood on end. I didn’t ask him what he was thanking me for. I didn’t want to hear Ceren’s name. I wanted this moment to last forever.

“We should go,” he said finally, though there was longing in his voice. And regret. He led me over to his stallion, who stood patiently waiting while the other horses stomped and snorted, ready to go home.

“I’ve never ridden a horse,” I said, staring up at the massive creature.

“All you have to do is hold on to me,” he said with a crooked grin. “Surely you can manage that.”

Grig helped lift me up onto the horse behind Talin, where I sat sideways, thanks to my skirts. My hair was still wet, and the cold of the lake hadn’t left my skin, but the heat of the horse and Talin himself began to warm me. He clucked to his horse, and I gripped him a little tighter. The trot was more uncomfortable than I’d imagined, each stride causing me to bounce painfully against Talin’s leather armor.

“It will be smoother if I canter,” he said over his shoulder. “But we’ll be going fast. Are you afraid?”

“A little.”

He laughed softly. “There’s nothing to be afraid of.” He clucked again and the horse broke into a canter. Immediately the stallion’s gait smoothed out into something tolerable, and if I closed my eyes I could almost imagine I was back in our family’s boat, riding the waves instead of an animal.

“Better?” he asked.

“Much. Thank you.”

“There is one problem with this,” he said, sounding very serious.

“And what’s that?”

“We’re going to be back at the castle far more quickly.”

I couldn’t help laughing. Perhaps it was the sense of power I’d felt saving Ceren’s life, but I wasn’t afraid now, even though I knew I should be. I pressed myself against Talin’s back and let the rising and falling sensation of the horse’s gait lull me to a sense of inner calm I wasn’t sure I’d ever feel again when I left Varenia.

As we neared New Castle, Talin slowed the horse to a walk. Reluctantly, I released my grip on him a bit, since I no longer had the excuse of speed. I glanced down at the wrinkled silk of my gown, my long hair wavy and loose over my shoulders. How was I going to explain my appearance to Ebb?

After a few minutes, Talin turned his head toward me. “Why did you do it?” he asked.

“What?”

“Save my brother. You could have let him die out there today, and you didn’t. You risked your own life for his.”

I toyed with one of the buckles on his armor. “Yes.”