Stewie laughed, high-fived him, and continued flying his plane as if nothing had happened.
Yet everything had happened.
To me, at least.
In that microsecond when Penn caught Stewie, all shields were down. He was younger, older, kinder, crueler, innocent, and guilty all at once. I saw hints of what I daren’t believe was possible. My heart took over and hammered with hope.
Each thud was a question.
What if?
What if?
What if?
What if Penn was Nameless?
What if Larry had somehow found him, saved him from prison, and done what I’d failed to do?
What if he’d come back for me?
But if that was true, why was he so mean? Why so closed off and impenetrable? We’d felt something that night. Something real if only so fleeting. Why punish me?
Would you listen to yourself?
You’re making up stories that have no earthly way of being true.
You’re worse than Disney with your ideals of true love against any odds.
This is reality, Elle!
Larry interrupted my inner scalding. “Penn said you have questions that he hasn’t answered yet.”
I startled. “He admitted to that?”
“Of course. We’re open about most things.”
“That’s an honorable thing.” I knitted my fingers together. “He told me you’d come to New York for treatment. Judging by how well you look, I think it worked.”
Larry ran a hand over his bristle-covered jaw. “I hate that I had to lean on him so much.” His smile was sad. “Nothing has more power than seeing someone you care about sick or grieving.” He shrugged the sudden dysphoria away. “But you’re right. The treatment worked. Thank goodness. I wasn’t prepared to leave just yet. I have too many things to do before I go.”
“Things?”
“People and things.” He smiled secretively. “My work, and now Penn’s, is never done.”
My brain dried up. I had no reply. I didn’t know what he meant or how to ask for clarification.
“Penn mentioned he’d taken you to the new building he just bought. What did you think?” Larry prompted with a new but just as aggravating subject.
“What did I think?”
“All that space. It’s exciting, isn’t it?”
“Space to do what?”
Larry winked. “He’ll tell you. It’s not my secret to ruin.” He looked at me pointedly. “I see you struggling. If my suggestion means anything—which I know is asking a lot, seeing as you don’t know me—but if you want to know him, give him a chance. It isn’t what you think. And you’ll need an open mind to accept. But we’re all a little corrupt, doing our best to fit into a world that’s broken but still demands perfection.”
“What—what do you mean by that?”
“I mean thieves can become saints. Saints can become thieves. Most of us deserve a second chance.”
Penn looked up at that moment, his dark gaze targeting mine. He half-smiled, his hands loose by his sides, his body straight but not as stiff as before. Without thinking, he placed his palm on Stewie’s shoulder as he bumped into him, racing below Bumble Bee not looking where his feet were going.
That simple caress—so expected and wanted was enough to crack my already fractured shell.
Penn’s hair was no longer shiny with sunlight but covered with a black baseball cap. Either Stewie had given it to him, or he’d had it hidden in a pocket. Either way, it shielded his eyes, and I saw another scenario I didn’t want to see.
Penn could easily be no one. He could be someone. He could be pain or happiness or heartbreak.
That was the problem.
How was I supposed to fall for a liar?
Blindly?
Trustingly?
Not at all?
I needed time.
I needed space.
I need to think.
“It was lovely to meet you, Larry.” I tore my gaze from Penn’s and smiled at the older gentleman. “I’ve got to go.”
I left before Penn could change my mind for the second time.
Chapter Thirty
SAGE CURLED UP on my lap as I sipped a glass of sparkling apple juice and stared at some TV program I hadn’t paid attention to for the past two hours.
Ever since leaving Central Park, I’d been in a fog I couldn’t shake.
I’d returned to work but had been absolutely hopeless. Steve had found me heading into my office and asked how Greg and I were. He acted as if he didn’t know his son had threatened me, and I didn’t want to flippantly tell him in a Belle Elle hallway. I scheduled a meeting with him next time he was free to discuss a leash for his wild heathen of a son.
Dad hadn’t returned to the office after the restaurant, Fleur answered my urgent emails on my behalf, and for the first time since I had my appendix out two and half years ago, I claimed health reasons and headed home to do my best to get my head on straight.
Greg worried me.
Dad concerned me.
Steve annoyed me.
And Penn...Penn claimed my thoughts in my home as much as he had in the park or at my office.
My heart had a box with three different puzzles mixed up inside. The pieces were tangled, their edges able to fit together to form an incorrect Frankenstein of three scenes, but unless the three puzzles were separated, none of them were true.
Puzzle one: Penn was nobody but a successful businessman who was bored and liked to lie.
Puzzle two: Penn was Nameless and treating me with contempt because...?