Dark Awakening

Page 38


“I can see why he wants you. He’d have to be a fool not to, and if you stay on this course, he won’t be the last. But you’re making a mistake in staying, Lily. There’s a lot you don’t understand about us. And about him.”


“I can’t tell you how tired I’m getting of hearing that.”


Jaden chuckled, another rarity, though there was little true humor in the sound. “At least Ty tried to tell you, then, though not hard enough, obviously.” His expression grew more serious. “I’m guessing tonight was the first you’d heard of his family. He doesn’t talk about that, not that I blame him. Life was hard for him from the beginning, and it got harder for a while after he was changed. Has he told you how he came to the Ptolemy?”


Lily shifted uneasily. “No. Only that the queen of the Ptolemy saved him and that he owes her.”


Jaden snorted. “Yeah. Well, she wouldn’t have had to save him if he hadn’t fought back during a Ptolemy raid of the local Cait Sith lair.” He stopped, shook his head. “But it’s not my story to tell. That one’s his.”


Her interest was piqued, but she refused to rise to the bait. She hadn’t exactly been going on about her own past issues, either, and Ty hadn’t asked until she’d nearly plastered a city block with vampire guts. Which was fine, she told herself. Just fine. She didn’t want to talk about it. He didn’t want to talk about it. Which left them… where?


“The past doesn’t matter,” Lily said, her chin going up. “And I don’t have any expectations, Jaden. He hasn’t lied to me and pretended we have a future. And I’m not pretending we have one. If being with him anyway makes me naive, well, then I guess I am.”


She hadn’t realized how it would hurt to say it, that there was no future, only the now. Nor had she realized how easily Jaden would pick up on that pain. She saw his pity and recoiled from it. She’d had enough pity in her life. It had never been warranted, and it wasn’t now. Still, she couldn’t help adding, “Ty’s different. He’s a good man, even though he thinks he isn’t.”


“See, that’s where you’ll pay the price for giving a damn, Lily,” Jaden replied, his expression darkening. “Ty’s not a bad man. Hell, he’s one of the best I’ve run with. Took me under his wing when I didn’t know my ass from a hole in the ground and hated everyone and everything. But he’s a lowblood. Worse, he’s a lowblood Ptolemy-owned Cait Sith. His life isn’t his own, and he does what he has to in order to survive.”


“Yeah, I get it,” Lily said unhappily. “I don’t like it, but I can accept it.”


Jaden’s burst of fury surprised her. “Don’t pretend it won’t hurt you when he gives you to that viper and walks away!” he snapped, eyes blazing with a sudden flash of unnatural light. “And he will walk away, Lily. It’s all he knows. Apart from that, this is about more than him. The Cait Sith are his family, and he thinks about them first: how his actions will affect their treatment, how staying in Arsinöe’s good graces will allow him to help some of the lowest who serve the Ptolemy. She gives him more chain than most, I’ll say that. But then, I was a favored little pet of hers too. And I think you saw where that got me.” He shook his head, his anger vanishing as quickly as it had appeared. “Ty’s the standard-bearer for the Cait Sith who have to live under the Ptolemy’s thumb, Lily. To a certain extent, Arsinöe’s favor of him spills onto all the Cait at court. He’s a goddamned legend to the ones still out in the world who are trying to make as much of a living as they can, hoping that the highbloods won’t come for them the way they did for so many of us.”


Lily frowned as she digested this and remembered the scene in her kitchen. “Damien, the Shade who’s after me, he basically called Ty a sellout. I thought maybe that’s how he was looked at, period.”


Jaden rolled his eyes. “Damien. Yeah, he would say that. Never listen to a Shade, Lily. They’re professional assassins with a God complex. He thinks he’s his own man? Not hardly. He has bosses to answer to, same as the rest of us. But whatever makes him feel better about the path he chose. Anyway, you wouldn’t see many of our line around here to find out what they think of Ty. The Cait Sith tend to live in the Ptolemy strongholds, and this sure isn’t one. You can tell their queen is an Egyptian. Fucking cat fixation. At least they give us jobs when no one else will, but the price for refusing them is steep. To the Ptolemy, my kind can only ever be slaves or prey. I’m going to see if I can get far enough away to try being neither.”


“What happened? Did she do that to you?” Lily asked. It was urgent, so urgent that she know.


Jaden’s gaze chilled, turning his blue eyes arctic, and he looked away. “She might as well have. But it doesn’t matter. I won’t go back. I’d die first.”


“Jaden.” Lily reached out, bridging the distance between them, and placed her hand on his arm. She felt how tightly he held himself, and it was her turn to feel pity. Still, it did get him to look at her.


“You need to tell Ty. Please.”


“Tell me what?”


His voice was gruff, sleepy, and thoroughly irritated. Lily turned and saw Ty standing in the doorway, looking much the same as he sounded. Her first impulse upon seeing him was the same it always was: She immediately wanted to be in his arms, wrapped around him. And when his eyes met hers, she saw she wasn’t alone in the sudden rush of desire.


Jaden’s sigh brought her back to reality.


“I’d tell the two of you to get a room, but you’ve already got one. Sun’s rising, brother. You ought to be asleep.”


“I could hardly sleep. Rogan would have picked every valuable available off my carcass,” Ty replied, sauntering into the room and coming to rest beside Lily, not touching her but close enough that every fiber of her being seemed to vibrate with his presence. He looked at the bag on the bed, at Jaden’s changed clothing, and immediately his eyes hardened.


“Going somewhere?”


“What if I am? I told you I’m not going back to the Ptolemy. As I told the lovely Lily, you’re welcome to come with me. But I doubt this safe house is all that safe, and I’m sure as hell not sticking around to find out. I need to get out of Chicago, ride out the storm in more neutral territory.”


“Isn’t that what I just paid for? Getting us out of here?”


She could hear incredulous anger in Ty’s voice, slowly increasing in intensity. Jaden, however, seemed nothing but defiant.


“I’ll do better on my own. Right now the heat’s on you, not me. Easier for me to slip away. If I stick with you, it might not be. I can’t risk the Ptolemy finding me, Ty. Try and understand that. You have something they want, and because of it I’m doubly in danger of being spotted. It wouldn’t look good for you either. Best to part ways now.”


“Jaden, if they came here looking for you, they’ll hunt you to ground no matter where you go. What did you do?”


Jaden crossed his arms over his chest, glaring. “Would it make any difference? You’ll go running back no matter what I say.”


“They whipped him,” Lily blurted out, and felt her cheeks heat as Jaden turned his glare on her. “He’s got marks all over his back, Ty. I saw them.”


Ty’s expression softened, saddened. “No. Jaden.”


Jaden bared his teeth, his fangs flashing. “And still you’ll go back to her. Do you know what I did to deserve it, Ty? I mentioned to her esteemed highness that her lover had been telling everyone who would listen that we were headed to war with the Dracul, and I wanted to know if it was true. Why shouldn’t I ask? The Cait are always put on the front lines of their petty squabbles. Can you imagine how it would be if there was all-out war? I thought we deserved to know whether this was really happening, so I could prepare the others.” He shook his head. “She told Nero. I was whipped for insubordination, the lash dipped in a poison that will ensure the scars stay with me. She never said a word. If I’d stayed, they would have put a collar on me.”


Ty’s jaw tightened. Lily saw a muscle twitch in his cheek. “They’re using the collars again?” He turned to Lily before she could ask. “A thousand years ago, at the dawn of my bloodline, the Ptolemy devised collars that prevented the Cait Sith from shifting back into human form. Back then, we were used as little more than intelligent vampire cats, guards and hunters whose only human trait was that we could listen and understand, think and obey. Many went mad from being bound that way—so many that the practice eventually stopped.”


“For a time. No longer,” Jaden interjected. “The perimeter guards are all collared and chained now, Ty. The only ones left standing on two feet are those who need their hands to serve.” His voice hardened. “I know what you’re thinking. You can’t save them. You can’t change her mind. Things have come full circle in the court, and there’s nothing to be done about it. There’s only highblood and gutterblood to the Ptolemy. No exceptions. You go back, you’re going to find out the hard way. Let them die.”


“Then many of our own die as well.” Ty blew out a breath and ran a hand through his hair. “I don’t know, Jaden. I never expected things would be so far gone.”


“Well, they are,” Jaden replied flatly. “She’s not what you thought. Or what I thought, for that matter. She never was. Just another highblood bitch, lording it over the unwashed masses.”


Ty shook his head slowly, sadly. “No. There was more there once.”


“There is nothing there!”


The raw fury in Jaden’s voice, written plainly across his face, was a shock to Lily’s system. There were layers to Jaden, she saw, and not all of them were pleasant. The one she saw now was all killer. Even Ty seemed startled by the flash of temper, staring silently while Jaden continued shouting into his face.

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