My entire body trembled with adrenaline and unhappiness. I didn’t dare move until the sound of the bedroom door opened and closed, as Fox left me. With a ragged gasp, I flopped to my side and curled into a tight ball.

The stickiness of his come smeared my inner thighs, and the chain cuffs dug into my wrists, but I couldn’t bring myself to move.

I couldn’t bring myself to think or curse or run.

Yet again life proved I was an idiot. A greedy money-grubber who thought she could see something dark and troubled in a man. Who believed in the fundamental goodness of people enough to let herself be used and tossed away.

It’d happened before. It’d happened again. I hadn’t learned my lesson.

I lay with my eyes wide open, watching the slow journey of the sun from sunrise to high noon to sunset. I couldn’t bring myself to think how to fix this or even to think of Clara.

I’d besmirched myself, tarnishing my hope with reality.

Fuck two hundred thousand dollars. Fuck him.

When twilight fell and I’d had enough of wallowing in the filth I’d created, I stood gingerly and hobbled to the bathroom.

Avoiding looking in the mirror, I focused on the silver around my wrists. With gritted teeth, I yanked them with all my strength, sweating with effort until a link pried open, allowing me to get free.

I couldn’t remove the necklace or belly chain, but at least my hands were free. Free to shower, get dressed, and walk out the f**king door.

Obsidian Fox had messed with the wrong girl. I would leave, then I would come back and make him regret ever hurting me.

I would teach him that even though he might be haunted, it gave him no right, none, to hurt others.

I would be his nightmare.

Chapter 8

Life was never easy.

I learned that thanks to a rigorous training program that left me mostly dead and fumbling for a way back to life.

I didn’t make excuses for my behaviour. I knew what I was.

But I found a way to deal with the blackness in my brain. I found unwilling victims and gave them my pain. It was a trade-off and it worked—for a time.

I thought I could wipe my violent past free all thanks to the cure I’d found in one woman.

I piled all my hopes and pleas and prayers into a miracle, and it f**king ruined me when it turned out to be false.

Instead of treating her kindly, I slipped back to the past and lost.

I raped her. I hurt her. I made her run and leave me.

I should’ve known inviting a fierce woman into my life would only make it worse.

She succeeded in being my personal hell.

She made sure to break me.

Fuck.

I couldn’t believe what I’d done. I couldn’t believe I’d taken her so rough with no f**king remorse or thought to her safety.

The instant she was bound, instead of being soothed by being in control, it made me snap.

Fuck!

I was the biggest bastard alive.

I couldn’t stand to be around her—knowing I ruined everything. I did the only thing I could do to protect her.

I ran.

I returned to the basement to pummel my anger into a piece of bronze. I f**ked up by taking her so fast. I forced myself on her and was no better than ra**st scum.

Bastard!

I cowered away and leeched my pain by branding the sole of my foot with a hot piece of iron. The stench of burning flesh helped purify my thoughts, giving me a respite from the monstrous things I’d done.

Only once I could think straight and resembled a human rather than a beast, did I search for her to apologise. I turned my house upside down, searching.

I couldn’t find her.

Anywhere.

Everywhere I looked, it was empty. Every room. Every space.

I’d damaged whatever existed between us, but I hadn’t expected her to abandon me.

You f**king raped her, you idiot!

I’d done to her what I’d sworn never to do again—I took someone’s free will and made them do something against their wishes. I was no better than them.

She was gone.

Gone!

The club opened at nine p.m., and I waited for Oscar at the top of the stairs, quaking with helplessness and rage. The moment he showed up, I roared, “You let her f**king leave?”

Oscar climbed the last stair with the stiffness of preparation for a fight. His shoulders tensed, face darkened.

I clenched and unclenched my fists. How dare she disappear! I couldn’t let it end like that. I had to make her forgive me. I had to apologise. I needed a f**king second chance.

He glared bloody murder, blue eyes tearing into mine. “What the f**k was I supposed to do? She’s a free woman, not a captive! She asked for a lift a few hours ago and I agreed.” Coming closer, he seethed, “What the hell did you do to her last night, Fox? She walked out of here as if she’d been used by a f**king stallion.” His gaze shot me with bullets of rage. “I hope you got your money’s worth because I doubt she’ll be coming back.”

This was the same prick who’d scorned Zel last night. The same man who looked at Zel as if she were a succubus out to steal my soul.

“That’s none of your f**king business. She was mine. We had a deal!”

“A deal? What? Where you were allowed to destroy the poor girl? Don’t make me laugh.”

My rage morphed into white-hot anger. Oscar couldn’t point fingers. Fucking hypocrite. He had more women than I’d ever met. He used them and cast them aside with no thought to their feelings.

“At least I’ve only hurt one.” I narrowed my eyes, daring him to argue.

Oscar’s mouth hung open. “Screw you. I f**k women who want me to f**k them. I don’t kidnap them and then rape them. For God’s sake, we’ll have the police here if she decides to lay charges.”

The thought of being touched by many, of being handcuffed and trapped in a cage, undid my shaky sanity even further. I was done living in cages, belonging to others. I was done.

I couldn’t speak. Anger closed my throat as I stood precariously close to the edge I was always one-step away from plummeting off.

“I f**ked her. So what?”

Oscar came forward. “Please tell me she wanted it or so help me. We may be business partners, Fox, and I don’t know what shit you dealt with in your past, but if you raped her, I’ll kill you myself.”

The switch deep inside—the one I always struggled with keeping off—flicked on. The compassion I’d fought so hard to cultivate disappeared in a puff of smoke. Every lesson I’d ever learned, all the pain I’d suffered, all the blood I’d spilled swamped me in a cloud of contamination.