Epilogue

We moaned into one another’s mouths as our bodies instinctively moved against each other. I moved my other arm off the sofa and wrapped it around Livvie’s waist. I had her pinned against me. A dark thrill rushed through me as I yielded to my primal nature to conquer.

I stopped kissing her and held her still as I bent my knees and thrust into her. I heard her cry out, but she didn’t ask me to stop. Her arms wrapped tightly around my head. I thrust again, and again, until at last, I felt the whole of me inside her tight heat.

I felt incapable of speech. I had wanted her for so long. I had dreamt of her in my sleeping hours and ached for her in my waking ones. There was nothing I could say to compare with the intense elation and satisfaction of finally having that which I had desired for so very long. Nothing except—

“I love you.”

I didn’t intend to say the words. I knew she wasn’t ready to hear them. However, I’d been waiting to tell her since the moment I watched her leave and I couldn’t hold it in a minute longer.

Livvie burst into tears and held me tighter to her chest to keep from meeting my eyes.

“Don’t stop,” she sobbed. She moved her body, sliding herself up and down my c**k in a rhythm that demanded I keep pace. I was at a loss for what to do. It seemed I’d done and said enough already, so I did the only thing I could: I did as I was told.

Pressed so close to Livvie’s chest, it was easy to find my way to her br**sts again. I put my mouth around one of her ni**les and resumed my previous attentions. I palmed her ass in both hands. I was rewarded with moans and sighs instead of sobs. All the while, I felt her pu**y trying to accommodate me further. Her wetness came more freely after a moment. Her muscles relaxed. I could move faster, push harder, and go deep on every forward thrust. The sound of my balls making contact with her wet flesh, her moans above me, the heat and tightness surrounding me—it all spurred me toward my crisis.

“More, Caleb. Oh, god, please!” Her words were a high-pitched plea. Her movements were frantic and disjointed. She was chasing an orgasm that wouldn’t come and then came too hard and fast.

I f**ked her through her climax. Her pu**y contracted around me, her muscles were rigid, and her sounds begged me to slow down. I couldn’t. I kept pounding into her until her orgasm subsided and she collapsed limply against me.

“Please, Caleb,” she panted against my ear. Her br**sts were sweaty and they slid against my chest. Beneath my sweater, I was caked in sweat too. I wasn’t going to stop to take it off. “Slow down.” I knew she had to be tender, especially after she’d come so hard. I forced myself to slow. “Yes,” she sighed contentedly, “I like that. Fuck me just like that.”

“Stop saying f**k,” I panted. “Or I won’t be able to slow down.”

She giggled.

“I’m sorry. You bring it out of me.” She found her way to my lips and kissed me. After a while, her movements fell into rhythm with mine. She pushed down as I thrust up. She pulled away when I did, only to meet me with equal force.

“God, you feel good,” I murmured against her mouth. I delighted in her mewling whimper and increase in pace. I hadn’t forgotten her silent rejection. Truth be told, it stung like a motherfucker, but I knew it wasn’t the time to bring it up. I’d made that mistake already.

“Fuck me,” she said though harsh breaths.

“Beg me,” I demanded. Two could very well play this game.

“Please, Caleb.” She held my face in her hands and looked into my eyes. If I had found my primal nature, Livvie had also found hers. Her need was unmistakable. Her lust intoxicating. “Please f**k me with your huge f**king cock. I want to watch you come.” She slid her eyes shut and moved her body harder and faster.

She certainly knew how to push my buttons. I only hoped she wouldn’t regret it. I held her with one arm as I raised us off the sofa and pushed her onto her back. I finally reached for my sweater and pulled it off. I pushed my jeans down to my knees while I was as it. There was a moment of resistance on her part that quickly evaporated as I pushed myself in to the hilt.

“Again, Kitten. Beg me.” Braced on one arm and holding her outer thigh, I watched myself f**k her. Remembered words made me smile. She was just right shade of pink. I glanced up and watched her br**sts moving to the rhythm of my thrusts.

“Please, Caleb.”

I couldn’t hold back any longer, but I wasn’t sure I should come inside her.

“Where do you want me to come?”

Livvie’s eyes pierced me with their intensity.

“Wherever you want.”

It hit me before I had a chance to decide. My balls drew up tight and I started coming. I tried to watch Livvie, but my eyes couldn’t stay open. I was lost to the feeling of being emptied, of being received into Livvie’s body.

Somewhere outside myself I knew Livvie was speaking. I couldn’t hear her clearly until my orgasm slowly subsided. I opened my eyes and looked down. Her hand was between us, touching the place we were joined.

“Mine,” I heard her say. Nothing had ever been truer.

“Yours,” I said.

CHAPTER THREE

I dreamt that night.

Rafiq looked up at me from a table. He was shaking from fear. His face was bruised and bloody. He spoke calmly.

“Me for the girl?”

A ripple of love was fast on the heels of my shame. The feeling was quickly overrun by an old anger, a rage that had kept me alive when death had been a far better option.

“No. Not just for the girl. You… made me love you. You betrayed me.”

Rafiq laughed, loud and rich, before his laughter devolved into gurgling coughs.

“Betrayal again. It’s always betrayal with you, Khoya.” His words sounded in my mind as though he were flesh and blood again. “You lie, boy. I didn’t make you love me. One cannot force love. What you gave, I earned.”

I held a knife in my hand; I knew I did. However, as is the nature of dreams, it disappeared once I tried to plunge it into his thigh. I had so much anger, so much rage, and nowhere to put it. Rafiq found it more than amusing and it only fueled my hatred.

“I gave you all you earned when I put a bullet in your heart!”

Rafiq coughed up blood as he laughed.

“You are the man I raised.” Slowly, his laughter subsided and he looked on me fondly. “I know you washed my body. I know you buried me in accordance with the law. I know you wept for me.”

His words wounded me despite knowing there was no way for him to know I did those things. Worse, it hurt knowing they were true.

“Why won’t you die?” I asked with venom. Rafiq smiled wickedly.

“You can’t kill me, Khoya. Not again. I’m all you know. I am your mother. I am your father. I am your brother. I am your friend. I’ll always be here. You’ll never be rid of me.”

As much as I loathed it, I was free to weep in my dreams and I did.

“How could you have done all those things to me? You stole my childhood. You stole my destiny.”

Rafiq, suddenly unfettered, rolled onto his side and sat up. The bruises on his face had healed and clothing had magically appeared on his body.

“That’s not what’s bothering you, Caleb. I betrayed you, yes, but that’s not why you killed me, is it?” I couldn’t look at him while I processed my shame. “You would have killed me anyway. You would have killed me because it’s the only way I would have let the girl go. You would have betrayed me, Khoya. We are not so different, and that’s what eats at you.” He raised a hand and ruffled my hair as he used to when I was young. My chest ached.

I pushed him with all my strength, knocking him backward over the table and onto the floor. I leapt into the air and landed on top of him. I punched him. Repeatedly. My fists felt ineffectual; I couldn’t get the force I required to beat him to death. Switching tactics, I held his neck in my hands and tried to squeeze the life out of him.

Rafiq’s maniacal gaze fell on me.

“I am a god here! You’ve made it so.”

“Just f**king die! Die! Die! I hate you! I wish you were alive so I could kill you all over again!” I dug my fingers into his eyes, growing hard as blood oozed onto my fingers. Rafiq tried to fight me this time. His hands pushed against me, his legs flailed, and his body twisted as he tried to buck me off. “I can kill you, Rafiq. You’re not a god. I feel nothing for you.”

Rafiq’s body went still under me.

“Master?” I heard a voice behind me. I turned and saw Livvie. She was wearing a white robe that reached the floor. Her hair was loose and unruly. She wore a slave collar at her throat. A wave of overwhelming guilt slammed into me.

“Livvie? Don’t look!” I turned my head toward Rafiq. His body had disappeared. Only a large bloody stain remained. My hands were covered in blood and gore. I wiped my hands on my thighs, but the blood wouldn’t come clean. “Don’t look,” I said and I was sobbing again. “Don’t look.”

Livvie’s footsteps approached and I could actually feel the weight of her arms wrapping around my shoulders. Her warmth descended on my back.

“It’s okay, Master. I know why you do it. You can’t help who you are.” I hunched over and her weight followed me.