Every Which Way But Dead

"It's me, Rachel," Kisten called, his voice faint over the music blaring from the living room. I froze, the memory of the kiss he'd given me keeping me where I stood. I must have looked like an idiot when he turned the corner and stopped in the threshold.



"Ivy's not here?" he said, his eyes giving me the onceover. "Shoot."



I took a breath to settle myself. "Shoot?" I questioned, sliding the cracked egg off the counter and into the bowl. I didn't think anyone said shoot anymore.



"Can I say shit?"



"Hell, yes."



"Shit, then." His gaze went from me to the kitchen, lacing his hands behind his back as I picked the bigger chunks of shell out.



"Hey, would you, ah, turn the music down for me?" I said, sneaking a glance at him when he nodded and walked out. It was Saturday, and he was dressed casually in leather boots and faded jeans that were nice and tight. His short leather coat was open, and a burgundy silk shirt showed a wisp of chest hair. Just enough, I thought as the music softened. I could smell his coat. I was a sucker for the scent of leather. This might be a problem.



"Are you sure Ivy didn't send you over to baby-sit?" I questioned as he returned and I wiped the egg slime off on a damp dishcloth.



He chuckled and sat in Ivy's chair. "No." He hesitated. "Is she going to be gone for a while, or can I wait?"



I didn't look up from the recipe, not liking how he had said that. There had been more inquiry in his voice than the question warranted. "Ivy went to talk to Jenks." I ran my finger down the page without looking at the words. "Then she's having dinner with her folks."



"Sunup," he murmured, and I felt my warning flags go up. All of them.



The clock above the sink ticked, and I took the melted chocolate off the stove. I wasn't about to stand with my back to him, so I set it on the counter between us, crossing my arms in front of me and putting my backside against the sink. Watching me, he tossed his hair out of his eyes. I took a breath to tell him to go, but he interrupted.



"Are you all right?"



I stared blankly at him, then remembered. "Oh! The demon - thing," I muttered, embarrassed as I touched the pain charms about my neck. "You heard about that, huh?"



He smiled with half his mouth. "You made the news. And I had to listen to Ivy for three solid hours while she bitched about not being here at the time."



Going back to my recipe, I rolled my eyes. "Sorry. Yeah. I'm okay. A few scrapes and bruises. Nothing major. But I can't tap a line after sundown anymore." I didn't want to tell him I wasn't entirely safe after dark either, unless I was on holy ground...which the kitchen and living room weren't. "It's really going to put a crimp in my runs," I said sourly, wondering how I was going to get around this latest mountain. Oh well. It wasn't as if I relied on ley line magic. I was an earth witch after all.



Kisten didn't seem to think it mattered much either, if his casual shrug meant anything. "I'm sorry to hear Jenks left," he said, stretching his legs out and crossing his boots at his ankles. "He was more than an asset to your company. He's a good friend."



My face screwed up into an unpleasant expression. "I should have told him what Trent was when I figured it out."



Surprise cascaded over him. "You know what Trent Kalamack is? No shit?"



Jaw clenched, I dropped my eyes to the recipe book and nodded, waiting for him to ask it.



"What is he?"



I stayed silent, my eyes fixed on the page. The soft sound of him moving pulled my gaze up.



"Never mind," he said. "It doesn't matter."



Relieved, I gave the chocolate a clockwise stir. "It matters to Jenks. I should have trusted him."



"Not everyone needs to know everything."



"You do if you're four inches tall with wings."



He got up, drawing my attention as he stretched. With a soft, satisfied sound, his shoulders eased and he collapsed in on himself. Taking his coat off, he headed to the fridge.



I tapped the spoon on the side to flick most of the chocolate off. My brow furrowed. Sometimes it was easier to talk to a stranger. "What am I doing wrong, Kisten?" I said, frustrated. "Why do I drive the people I like away?"



He came out from behind the fridge door with the bag of almonds I'd bought last week. "Ivy's not leaving."



"Those are mine," I said, and he paused until I gestured sourly that he could have them.



"I'm not leaving," he added, mouth gently moving as he ate one.



I exhaled noisily, dumping the measured sugar into the chocolate. He looked really good over there, and memories kept intruding: thoughts of us dressed up and enjoying ourselves, the spark his black eyes drew through me when Saladan's heavies lay broken in the street, Piscary's elevator with me wrapped around him wanting to feel him taking everything I had....



The crunch of the sugar against the pan was loud as I stirred. Damn vamp pheromones.



"I'm glad Nick left," Kisten said. "He wasn't good for you."



I kept my head down, but my shoulders tensed. "What do you know about it?" I said, tucking a long red curl behind my ear. I looked up, finding him calmly eating my almonds. "Nick made me feel good. I made him feel good. We had fun together. We liked the same movies, the same places to eat. He could keep up with me when we ran at the zoo. Nick was a good person, and you have no right to pass judgment on him." I snatched a damp dishcloth, wiping up my spilled sugar and shaking it into the sink.



"You may be right," he said as he jiggled a handful of nuts into his palm and rolled the bag shut. "But I find one thing fascinating." He put a nut between his teeth and crunched through it noisily. "You put him in the past tense."



My mouth dropped open. Torn between anger and shock, my face went cold. In the living room, the music changed to something fast and bouncy - and totally inappropriate.



Kisten cracked the fridge open, set the nuts back into the door, and closed it. "I'll wait for Ivy for a while. She might come back with Jenks - if you're lucky. You have a tendency to demand more of a person than most are willing to give." He shook the nuts still left in his hand as I sputtered. "Kind of like a vampire," he added as he picked up his coat and walked out.



My hand was dripping, and I realized I was squeezing the dishcloth so hard that water was seeping out. I threw it into the sink, furious and depressed. Not a good combination. From the living room, happy pop music bounced and skittered. "Will you turn that off!" I shouted. My jaw ached where I was clenching it, and I forced my teeth to part when the music stopped. Fuming, I measured out the sugar and dumped it in. I reached for the spoon, a sound of frustration coming from me as I remembered I had already added the sugar. "Damn it back to the Turn," I muttered. Now I'd have to make a double batch.



Spoon held tightly, I tried to stir it in. Sugar went everywhere, spilling over the edge. My teeth gritted, and I stomped back to the sink for the dishcloth.



"You don't know squat," I whispered as I scraped the spilled sugar into a little pile. "Nick might come back. He said he was. I have his key."



I pushed the gathered sugar into the cup of my hand, hesitating before I dumped it into the bowl with the rest. Brushing the last of the grit from my fingers, I looked at the dark hallway. Nick wouldn't give me his key if he wasn't coming back.



Music started up, soft with a steady beat. My eyes narrowed. I never said he could put something else in. Angry, I took a step toward the living room, then jerked to a halt. Kisten had left in the middle of a conversation. He had taken food with him. Crunchy food. According to Ivy's dating book, that was a vampiric invitation. And following him would be saying I was interested. Even worse, he knew I knew.



I was still staring at the hallway when Kisten walked past. He backpedaled to a stop as he saw me there with a blank look on my face.



"I'll wait in the sanctuary," he said. "Is that okay with you?"



"Sure," I whispered.



His eyebrows rose, and with that same little smile, he ate an almond. "Okay." Kisten vanished down the dark hallway, his boots silent on the hardwood floor.



I turned away and stared at the night-blackened window. I counted to ten. I counted to ten again. I counted to ten a third time, finding myself in the hallway by the time I reached seven. I'll go in, say my piece, and leave, I promised myself when I found him at the piano, his back to me as he sat on the bench. He pulled himself straight as my feet scuffed to a halt.



"Nick is a good man," I said, my voice shaking.



"Nick is a good man," he agreed, not turning around.



"He makes me feel wanted, needed."



Kisten slowly spun. His stubble caught the faint light filtering in from the street. The outline of his wide shoulders tapered down to his slim waist, and I mentally shook myself at how good he looked. "He used to." His low, smooth voice sent a shiver through me.



"I don't want you to talk about him anymore," I said.



He gazed at me for a heartbeat, then said, "Okay."



"Good." I took a quick breath, turned and walked out.



My knees were shaking, and listening for any steps behind me, I took a right into my room. Heart pounding, I reached for my perfume. The one that hid my scent.



"Don't."



Gasping, I turned, finding Kisten behind me. Ivy's bottle slipped from my fingers. His hand darted out, and I jumped as it enfolded mine, imprisoning the precious bottle safe within my grip. I froze. "I like the way you smell," he whispered, far, far too close.



My stomach clenched. I could risk bringing Al down on me by tapping a line to knock him unconscious, but I didn't want to. "You need to get out of my bedroom," I said.



His blue eyes looked black in the dim light. The faint glow from the kitchen made him an alluring, dangerous shadow. My shoulders were so tense they hurt as he opened my hand and took the perfume from me. The click as it hit my dresser jerked me straight. "Nick isn't coming back," he said, unaccusing and blunt.



My breath slipped from me, and I closed my eyes. Oh God. "I know."



My eyes jerked open when he took my elbows. I froze, waiting for my scar to flash into play, but it didn't. He wasn't trying to bespell me. A foolish part of me respected that, and like an idiot, I did nothing instead of telling him to get the hell out of my church and away from me.



"You need to be needed, Rachel," he said, inches away as his breath shifted my hair. "You live so brightly, so honestly, that you need to be needed. You're hurting. I can feel it."



"I know."



His solemn eyes took on a shade of pity. "Nick is human. No matter how he tries, he'll never understand you entirely."



"I know." I swallowed hard. There was a wet warmth in my eyes. My jaw tightened until my head hurt. I will not cry.



"He can't give you what you need." Kisten's hands slipped to my waist. "He'll always be just a little afraid."



I know. My eyes closed, opening as I let him pull me closer.



"And even if Nick learns to live with his fear," he said earnestly, his eyes asking me to listen, "he won't ever forgive you for being stronger than he is."



A lump formed in my throat. "I...I have to go," I said. "Excuse me."



His hands fell from me, and I pushed past him and into the hall. Confused and wanting to scream at the world, I strode into the kitchen. I stopped, seeing among the pots and flour a huge aching emptiness that had never been there before. Arms wrapped about myself, I lurched into the living room. I had to get the music off. It was beautiful. I hated it. I hated everything.



Snatching up the remote, I pointed it at the player. Jeff Buckley. I couldn't handle Jeff in the state I was in. Who in hell put Jeff Buckley in my player? Clicking it off, I tossed the remote to the couch. Adrenaline jerked me straight as the remote hit, not the suede of Ivy's couch, but someone's hand.



"Kisten!" I stammered as he turned the music back on, watching me with half-lidded eyes. "What are you doing?"



"Listening to music."



He was calm and wire-tight, and panic struck me at his calculating surety. "Don't sneak up on me like that," I said, my breath coming short. "Ivy never sneaks up on me."



"Ivy doesn't like who she is." His eyes were unblinking. "I do."



He reached out. Breath coming in a quick surge, I knocked his arm aside. Tension sang through me as he jerked me forward, holding me to him. Panic, then anger, flashed. There wasn't a twinge from my scar. "Kisten!" I exclaimed, trying to move. "Let me go!"



"I'm not trying to bite you," he said softly, his lips brushing my ear. "Stop it."



His voice was firm, soothing. There was no blood lust in it. My thoughts flashed back to waking up in his car to the sound of singing monks. "Let go!" I demanded, strung out and feeling like I was either going to hit him or start to cry.



"I don't want to. You're hurting too much. How long has it been since someone held you? Touched you?"



A tear leaked out and I hated that he saw it. Hated he knew I was holding my breath.



"You need to feel, Rachel." His voice grew soft, pleading. "This is killing you slowly."



I swallowed the lump in my throat. He was seducing me. I wasn't such an innocent that I knew he wouldn't try. But his hands upon my arms were warm. And he was right. I needed another's touch, ached for it, damn me to hell. I had almost forgotten how it felt to be needed. Nick had given that back to me, that tiny thrill of excitement knowing someone was wanting to touch you, wanting you and you alone to touch him.



I had endured more short-term relationships than a socialite has shoes. Either it was my I.S. job, or my wacko mother pushing for commitment, or that I attracted jerks who simply saw a redhead as a potential notch on their broomstick. Maybe I was a crazy bitch demanding trust without being able to give it. I didn't want another one-sided relationship, but Nick was gone and Kisten smelled good. He made me feel the pain less.



My shoulders eased, and he exhaled as he felt me stop fighting him. Eyes closing, I dropped my forehead into his shoulder as my folded arms made a small space between us. The music was soft and slow. I wasn't crazy. I could trust. I did trust. I had trusted Nick, and he had left.



"You'll leave," I breathed. "They all leave. They get what they want, and they leave. Or they find out what I can do, and then they leave."



His arms about me tightened for an instant, then relaxed. "I'm not going anywhere. You already scared the hell out of me when you took Piscary down." He buried his nose in my hair and breathed in my scent. "And I still am here."



Lulled by his body warmth and his touch, my tension tricked away. Kisten altered my balance - and I moved with him. Moving, hardly moving, our weight shifted as the slow and seductive music lured me into swaying with him.



"You can't hurt my pride," Kisten whispered, his fingers tracing the middle of my back. "I've lived my entire life with people stronger than I. I like that, and have no shame in being the weaker one. I'll never be able to cast a spell, and I don't give a shit that you can do something I can't."



The music and our almost-not-moving started a warm spot in me. Licking my lips, I slipped my arms from between us to find they felt natural about his waist. My heartbeat quickened and my eyes were wide as I stared at the wall, my breath slipping in and out of me in an unreal evenness. "Kisten..."



"I'll always be here," he said softly. "You can never fill my need, never drive me away, no matter how much you give me. The good or the bad. I'll always be hungry for emotion, always and forever, and I can feel you hurting. I can turn it to joy. If you'll let me."



I swallowed as he drew us to a stop. He pulled back, and with a gentle touch on my jaw, he tilted my head so he could see my eyes. The pulsing beat of the music pattered on my mind, numbing and soothing. His gaze was heady. "Let me do this," he whispered, deeply dangerous. But with his words, he put me in a position of power. I could say no.



I didn't want to.



My thoughts pinged through me too fast to be realized. His hands felt good, and his eyes held passion. I wanted what he could give me - what he promised. "Why?" I whispered.



His lips parted and he breathed, "Because I want to. Because you want me to."



I didn't look from him. His pupils never shifted, never grew. My grip on him became firmer as my arms pressed into him. "There will be no sharing of blood, Kisten. Ever."



His breath came and went, and his hands tightened. Expression dusky with the knowledge of what was to come, he leaned closer. "One," he said as he kissed the corner of my mouth. "Step." He kissed the other side. "At a time," he continued as he kissed me gently, so gently it made me ache for more. "My love," he finished.



A stab of desire went right to my core. My eyes closed. Oh God. Save me from myself.



"I make no promises," I whispered.



"I don't ask for any," he said. "Where are we going?"



"I don't know." My hands drifted downward from his waist. We were swaying to the music again. I felt alive, and as we almost-danced, a hint of fire came from my demon scar.



"Can I do this?" Kisten asked, moving closer so more of our bodies touched. I knew he was asking my permission to play upon my scar, to willingly let him bespell me. That he asked gave me a feeling of security I knew was probably false.



"No. Yes. I don't know." So torn. It felt good, just my body touching his, his arms about my waist, a new demand in their strength. "I don't know...."



"Then I won't." Where were we going? Exhaling, he ran his hands down my arms, lacing his fingers in mine. Gently he pulled my hands to the small of his back, holding them there as we swayed, shifting to the slow, seductive music.



A shiver rose inside me. The scent of leather grew thick and warm. Where he touched sent a sliver of heat to tingle my fingers. My head dropped into the hollow between his neck and shoulder. I wanted to put my lips there, knowing what he would feel, knowing how he would taste if I dared. But I didn't, contenting myself to send my breath there instead, afraid of what he would do if my lips touched him.



Heart pounding, I moved his hands to the small of my back and I left them there, moving, pressing, massaging. My hands rose to twine my fingers behind his head. My thoughts touched upon us in the elevator when I thought Piscary was going to kill me. It was too much to resist, the memory of my demon scar alive and alight.



"Please," I whispered, my lips brushing his neck to make him tremble. His torn earlobe was inches from me, tempting. "I want you to." Pulling my gaze up, I searched his eyes, seeing but not fearing the narrowing band of blue. "I trust you. But I don't trust your instincts."



A deep understanding and relief pinched his eyes. His hands dropped lower, caressing until they found the top of my legs, then reversed their motion, moving, always moving, as we swayed. "I don't trust them either," he said, fake accent utterly gone. "Not with you."



My breath caught as his fingers traced from my back to my front, a whisper against my jeans. Tugging at the top button. Hinting. "I'm wearing caps," he said. "The vampire has been defanged."



Startled, my lips parted as he smiled, showing me that his sharp canines were indeed capped. It sent a surge of heat through me, disquieting and thought provoking. Sure, he couldn't draw blood, but now I'd let him explore a hell of a lot more of me. And he knew it. But safe? No. He was more dangerous now than if he hadn't capped his teeth.



"Oh God," I whispered, knowing I was lost as he nuzzled his head into the hollow of my shoulder and gently kissed me. Eyes closing, I sent my fingers into his hair, clenching as his kiss shifted, moving to the very edge of my collarbone where my scar started.



Waves of demand pulsed from it, and my knees buckled.



"Sorry," Kisten breathed huskily as he caught my elbows and kept me upright. "I didn't know it was that sensitive. Just how much saliva did you get dosed with?"



His lips were off my neck and by my ear. Almost panting, I leaned into him. The blood in me pounded, wanting me to do something. "I almost died," I said. "Kisten..."



"I'll be careful," he said, the tenderness going right to my core. I willingly followed his lead as he sat me on the couch, nestling me between the back and the arm. Taking his hands, I pulled Kisten down beside me. My scar was tingling and waves of promise scoured me. Where were we going?



"Rachel?"



I heard the same question in his voice, but I didn't want to answer. Smiling, I pulled him closer across the couch. "You talk too much," I whispered, and covered my mouth with his.



A soft sound came from him as his lips pushed back, his stubble rough. Fingers spaced wide across my cheek, he held me still as I pulled his weight farther down upon me. Nudging my hip, he made room for his knee between me and the back of the couch.



My skin tingled where his fingers touched my jaw. I slipped a hesitant tongue between his lips, and my breath came quick as he darted his tongue deep into me. He tasted faintly of almonds, and when he moved to draw away, I twined my fingers at the nape of his neck to keep him there just a moment longer. He made a surprised sound, pushing more aggressively. Now I pulled back, running my tongue across the smoothness of his teeth as I went.



Kisten shuddered, the tremor felt clearly as he supported his weight over me. I didn't know how far I wanted to go. But this? This was good. I couldn't lead him on, promising more than I could give. "Wait..." I said reluctantly, meeting his gaze.



But seeing him above me, breathless with his passion held in check, I hesitated. His eyes were black, heady with desire and need. I searched for and found a carefully checked blood lust. His shoulders were tense under his shirt, a hand was firm against my side, his thumb massaging under my halter. The look of wanting in him sent adrenaline to my core, rousing me more than his rough and gentle touch that rose higher to find my breast. Oh, to be wanted, needed.



"What?" he said, poised and waiting.



The hell with it. "Never mind," I said, playing with the hair about his ear.



His soft hand under my halter top went still. "You want me to stop?"



A second stab of feeling struck though me. I felt my eyes close. "No," I breathed, hearing a hundred well-thought-out convictions die in that word. Heart pounding, I slipped my amulets from me and dropped them to the carpet - I wanted to feel everything - but it wasn't until I reached for his belt buckle that he understood.



A low guttural sound escaped him, and he dropped his head to mine. His weight was a welcomed warmth pressing on me as his lips found my demon scar and gently mouthed it.



Fire spilled like molten stone through me to my groin, and I gasped as the sensation rebounded and multiplied. The dull aches from my recent demon attack mutated into pleasure, courtesy of the old vampire saliva he was playing upon. I couldn't think. I couldn't breathe. My hands jerked out from where I had been trying to undo his pants, and I clutched his shoulder. "Kisten," I breathed when I was able to take a shuddering breath.



But he didn't let up, pushing me down until my head was on the arm of the couch. My fingers dug into him as gentle teeth replaced his lips. A groan escaped me, and he worked the scar, his teeth soft and his breath harsh. I wanted him. I wanted all of him.



"Kisten..." I pushed at him. I had to ask first. I had to know.



"What?" he said flatly as he pushed my shirt and halter out of the way and his fingers found my breast and began moving, promising more.



In the gap between us, I finally got his belt undone. I gave a tug, and I heard a rivet snap through. His head dropped back to me, and before he could find my neck again and send me into an unaware ecstasy, I undid his zipper and sent my hands searching. God save me, I thought as I found him, the smooth skin tight under my questing fingers. "You've had sex with a witch before?" I whispered, pushing his jeans down and running my hand across his backside.



"I know what I'm getting into," he said breathily.



I felt myself melt into the couch as my thoughts and shoulders eased. My hands found him again, and he exhaled long and slow. "I didn't want to assume - " I said, then gasped as he dropped his weight lower and pulled my shirt up. "I didn't want you to be surprised.... Oh God. Kisten,"I panted, almost frantic with need as his lips moved from under my jaw to my collarbone and then to my breast. Waves of promise rose high, and I arched my back as he pulled, his hands warm against my skin. Where was he? I couldn't reach that far.



He silenced my whisper as he lifted his face and kissed me. Now I could reach, and my breath slipped from me in bliss as I grasped him and sent my fingers moving lower. "Kisten..."



"You talk too much," he said, his lips moving against my skin. "You ever have sex with a vamp?" he said, his eyes half closed, watching me.



I exhaled as he turned his attention to my neck again. His fingers traced the path his lips were going to take, and waves of ecstasy rolled through me when they did. "No," I panted as I yanked his jeans down. I'd never get them off over his boots. "Anything I should be aware of?"



He ran his hands under my breast, again tracing the path his lips soon followed. Back arched, I tried not to moan with need as I reached down, trying to find all of him. "We bite," he said, and I cried out when he did just that, gently pinching me between his teeth.



"Get my pants off before I kill you," I panted, almost insane with desire.



"Yes, ma'am," he growled, and his stubble scraped me as he pulled away.



I took a much needed deep breath, following him up to push him back down and straddle him. His hands worked my zipper as I fumbled with the buttons of his shirt. A sigh escaped me when I got the last one undone and sent my hands over him, my fingers tracing up and across the definition of his abs and chest. I leaned over him, my hair hiding what I was doing as my lips hop-skipped from his middle to the hollow at his neck. I lingered there, hesitantly, daring to run my teeth against his skin, pulling against it with a slight pressure. Under me, he shivered, and his hands, working my jeans down my hips, shook.



Eyes wide, I pulled away, thinking I had gone too far.



"No," he whispered, putting his hands on my waist to keep me there. His face was strained with emotion. "Don't stop. It's...I won't break your skin." His eyes flashed open. "Oh God, Rachel. I promise I won't break your skin."



The passion in his voice struck me. Abandoning myself, I pinned him to the couch, knees to either side. Lips searching, I found his neck, turning my kisses into something more substantial. His heavy breaths and light hands drove my desire into pulsing demands, pounding through me in time with my heartbeat. Teeth replaced my lips, and his breath grew ragged.



His hands grasped my waist, and I was lifted up enough that I could push my jeans off. They caught on my socks, and with a cry of impatience, I pulled my lips from him long enough to kick them off. Then I was back, my skin warm where it touched him under me. I leaned over him, holding his neck unmoving as I used my teeth against his skin instead of my lips.



Kisten's breath came in a shuddering sound. "Rachel," he breathed, his hands firm against my middle as he sent his hand downward, searching.



A low sound, barely audible, came from me as his fingers brushed me. In his touch, I felt his need flash into demand. My eyes closed and I sent one hand downward, finding him.



Feeling him against me, I shifted forward, then back. Our breath slipped out in tandem as we joined. Heavy and potent, my want and relief rose. He slipped deep inside me. Soon, God help me, if it wasn't soon, I was going to die. His soft breathing rose to swirl in my thoughts, sending surges from my neck to my groin.



My heart pounded, and his fingers traced my neck, resting atop my pulsing skin. We moved together, a pace steady with promise. His free arm wrapped about me, holding me closer, its weight both imprisoning and secure.



"Give me this," he whispered, drawing me closer, and I willingly bent to his will, letting his lips find my demon scar.



My breath came in a loud gasp. I shuddered, our rhythm shifting. He held me close as the waves of desire built upon themselves. His lips on my neck became teeth, hungry, demanding. There was no pain, and I urged him to do what he would. A small part of me knew if he hadn't his caps, I would have been bitten. It only drove me to a more desperate need. I heard myself cry out, and his grip trembled, becoming tighter.



Wild with passion, I clutched his shoulders. It was there, I only needed to catch it. My breath came fast against his neck. There was nothing but him, and me, and our bodies moving together. His rhythm shifted, and feeling his passions beginning to crest, I found his neck and sent my teeth into him again.



"Harder," he whispered. "You can't hurt me. I promise you can't hurt me."



It tipped me over the edge, and as I played pretend with my vampire, I lunged hungrily into him with no thought of what I'd leave behind.



Kisten groaned, his arms tightening around me. His head pushed mine aside, and with a guttural sound, he buried his face in my neck.



I cried out as his lips found my scar. Fire struck my body alight. With that, fulfillment crashed upon me and I climaxed. Wave after wave rose, each building on the one before. Kisten shuddered, his motion under me ceasing as his passions crested an instant after my own. My breath came in a pained sound and I trembled, unable to move, fearing and wanting the last tingling jolts. "Kisten?" I managed as they faded to nothing and I found myself panting against him.



His grip about me hesitated and his hands fell away. My forehead dropped to his chest, and I took a shaking breath, exhausted and spent. I could do nothing as I lay atop him, my eyes half closed. Slowly I realized my back was cold and that Kisten's hand was tracing a warm path up and down my spine. I could hear his heartbeat and smell our scents mingling. Muscles trembling with fatigue, I pulled my head up to find his eyes shut and a contented smile on him.



My breath caught. Holy shit. What had I just done?



Kisten's eyes opened, finding mine. They were clear and blue, the black of his pupil normal and calming. "Now you're afraid?" he said. "It's a little late for that."



His gaze lingered on my black eye - only now seeing it with my amulets on the floor. I pulled myself up from him, immediately falling back as it was cold. My limbs started shaking. "Um, that was fun," I said, and he laughed.



"Fun," he said, running a finger down my jawline. "My wicked witch thought that was fun." His smile wouldn't leave him. "Nick was a fool to let you go."



"What do you mean?" I said, shifting to move, but his hands held me to him.



"I mean," he said softly, "that you are the most erotic woman I've ever touched. That you're both a wide-eyed innocent and an experienced slut all at the same time."



I stiffened. "If this is your attempt at pillow talk, it sucks eggs."



"Rachel," he cajoled, the heavy look of satisfied tenderness the only thing keeping me where I was. That and I didn't think I could stand up quite yet. "You have no idea how arousing it is to have your tiny little teeth on me, struggling to break through, tasting without tasting. An innocent, experienced and hungry all at the same time."



I raised my eyebrows, blowing a strand of hair out of my eyes. "You had this all planned, didn't you?" I accused. "Thought you could come in here and seduce me like you do everyone else?" It wasn't as if I could be angry, lying atop him as I was, but I tried.



"No. Not like everyone else," he said, the glint in his eyes going right to my core. "And yes, I came over here fully intending to seduce you." He lifted his head and whispered in my ear, "It's what I'm good at. Just like you're good at evading demons and kicking ass."



"Kicking ass?" I questioned as he dropped his head back to the arm of the couch. His hand was exploring again, and I didn't want to move.



"Yeah," he said, and I jumped as he found a ticklish spot. "I like a woman who takes care of herself."



"Not much of a white knight on a horse, huh?"



He raised one eyebrow. "Oh, I could," he said. "But I'm a lazy son of a bitch."



I laughed at that, and he joined me with his own chuckle as his grip about my waist tightened. With a little lurch, he lifted me from him. "Hold on," he said as he stood, swinging me into the cradle of his arms as if I was a five-pound bag of sugar. With his vamp strength, he held me with one arm and hoisted his pants up loose about his hips. "Shower?"



My arms were laced about his neck, and I inspected it for bite marks. There wasn't a one, though I knew I had bit down hard enough to leave them. I also knew without looking that he hadn't made a visible mark on me despite his roughness. "That sounds great," I said as he shuffled forward, his jeans still unzipped.



"I'll get you a shower," he said as I looked behind me to my amulets, pants, and one sock strewn on the floor. "And then we'll open all the windows and air the church out. I'll help you finish making your fudge, too. That will help."



"It's brownies."



"Even better. That uses the oven." He hesitated before my bathroom door, and feeling cared for and wanted in his arms, I pushed it open with my foot. The man was strong. I'd give him that. This was as satisfying as the sex. Well, almost.



"You have scented candles, don't you?" he asked as I flicked on the light with my toe.



"I have two X-chromosomes," I said dryly as he set me atop the washer and pulled off my last sock. "I have a candle or two." He was going to help me into the shower? How sweet.



"Good. I'll get one going in the sanctuary. Tell Ivy you put it there in the window for Jenks, and you can keep it going until sunup."



A whisper of unease pulled me straight, and my motions grew slow as I pulled my sweater over my head and dropped it onto the washer. "Ivy?" I questioned.



Kisten leaned against the wall and took off his boots. "You don't mind telling her?"



His boot thumped into the far wall, and my face went cold. Ivy. Scented candles. Airing out the church. Making brownies to scent the air. Washing his scent off me. Swell.



Smiling his bad-boy smile, Kisten padded to me in his socks and open jeans. His wide hand cupped my jaw and he leaned close. "I don't mind if she knows," he said, and I didn't move, enjoying the warmth. "She's going to find out eventually. But I'd break it to her gently if I were you, not dump it on her." He gave me a soft kiss on the corner of my mouth. His hand trailed reluctantly from me as he backed up and opened the door to the shower.



Crap, I'd forgotten about Ivy. "Yeah," I said distantly, recalling her jealousy, her dislike of surprises, and how badly she reacted to both. "You think she's going to be upset?"



Kisten turned, his shirt off and water beading on his hand from feeling the temperature. "Upset? She's going to be as jealous as a green apple that you and I have a physical way to express our relationship and she doesn't."



Frustration filled me. "Damn it, Kisten. I'm not going to let her bite me so she knows I like her. Sex and blood. Blood and sex. It's the same thing, and I can't do that with Ivy. I'm not wired that way!"



He shook his head, a sad smile on him. "You can't say blood and sex are the same thing. You've never given blood to another. You have nothing to base your view on."



I frowned. "Every time a vamp puts his eyes on me looking for a snack, it feels sexual."



He came forward, wedging his body between my knees, pressing close up to the washer. His hand went out, and he pushed my hair back over my shoulder. "Most living vampires who are looking for a quick fix find a willing partner faster when they stir them sexually. But Rachel, the meaning behind the giving and receiving blood isn't supposed to be based on sex but respect and love. That you can't be moved by the promise of great sex is why Ivy gave up that tack with you so quickly. But she's still hunting you."



I thought of all the facets of Ivy that Skimmer's appearance had forced me to openly acknowledge. "I know."



"Once she gets over her initial anger, I think she'll be all right with us dating."



"I never said I was dating you."



He smiled knowingly and touched my cheek. "But if I took your blood, even in accident or a moment of passion?" Kisten's blue eyes pinched in worry. "One scratch and she'd stake me. The entire city knows she's put a claim on you, and God help the vamp that gets in her way. I took your body. If I touch your blood, I'm dead twice."



I went cold. "Kisten, you're scaring me."



"You should be scared, little witch. She's going to be the most powerful vampire in Cincinnati someday, and she wants to be your friend. She wants you to be her savior. She thinks you'll either find a way to kill the vamp virus in her so she can die with her soul intact, or be her scion so she can die knowing that you'll be there to take care of her."



"Kisten. Stop."



Smiling, he kissed my forehead. "Don't worry. Nothing has changed from yesterday. Tomorrow will be the same. She's your friend, and she won't ask anything you can't give."



"That doesn't help."



He shrugged, and with a last touch on my side, he took a step back. Steam billowed out from the crack in the door as Kisten shimmied out of his jeans and leaned into the shower to adjust the temperature again. My eyes ran from his well-toned calves to his tight behind to his broad back, lightly muscled. All thoughts of Ivy's coming anger vanished. Damn.



As if feeling my eyes on him, he turned, catching me ogling him.



The steam eddied about him. Drops of moisture from the showerhead clung to his stubble. "Let me help you get your camisole off," he said, the timbre of his voice shifting.



I ran my eyes down him again, grinning as I brought my gaze up. Double damn.



He slipped his hands behind my back, and with a little help on my part, he nudged me forward to the edge of the dryer and slipped my halter top off. Wrapping my legs around him, I laced my hands behind his neck and tucked my chin into the hollow of his neck. God help me, he was beautiful. "Kisten?" I questioned as he nuzzled my hair out of the way and found the ticklish spot behind my ear. A warm feeling started in my middle, stemming from where his lips touched me, demanding I recognize it. Accept it. Call it a good thing.



"Do you still have that tight leather biker outfit?" I asked, kind of embarrassed.



Lifting me off the washer and carrying me into the shower, he laughed.