Forever Princess

“I want to discuss this now,” Mom said. “I want you to make an informed choice, not just pick any old place because your father is pressuring you.”

“And I don’t want to go to some Ivy League college,” I said, “that I didn’t deserve to get into and that just let me in because I’m a princess.” I was fully stalling for time, because all I wanted to do was go into my room and try to digest the whole losing-my-virginity-on-Saturday thing. And the fact that Lilly Moscovitz, my ex-best friend, knew about it. Was she going to tell her brother?

No. She wouldn’t. She didn’t care about me anymore. So why would she?

Except to totally and completely annihilate me in his eyes even further than I have been already by my own idiotic behavior.

“Then don’t go to some Ivy League college,” Mom said. “Go to some college you might have had a shot at getting into without the princess thing. Let me help you pick a place. Please, Mia, for the love of God. Don’t tell me your future degree is an MRS.”

“What’s that?” I asked her.

“Mrs. Reynolds-Abernathy IV,” she said.

“It’s a PROMISE ring,” I yelled at her. God! Why doesn’t anyone listen to me? And why, when I’d been getting my feet done with all those girls who’d had sex, hadn’t I asked them more questions about it? I know I wrote about it in my romance novel. I’ve certainly READ about it quite a bit.

But that’s not the same as actually doing it, you know?

“Good,” Mom said, about the promise ring thing. “Then PROMISE me you’ll let me help narrow it down a little so I can tell your father I’m on this. He’s called me twice about this today. And he only just got back to Genovia a few hours ago. And I’m slightly worried about it myself, you know.”

I made a face at her. Then I went around the room and picked up the acceptance packets to the schools I thought I could bear spending four years attending. I tried to pay special attention to the ones that didn’t count SAT scores (I looked them up on the computer, per Michael’s suggestion…even though I didn’t do it for HIM. I just did it because…well, it was good advice), and that might possibly have let me in despite the whole princess thing.

It was probably the most mature thing I did all day. Besides organize my thank-you notes for all my birthday gifts. I didn’t exactly come to a final decision about where I want to go, but I narrowed it down quite a bit so that possibly, maybe by election day slash prom, I might be able to tell them I’d decided on someplace.

I think. Sort of.

I was in the middle of getting my Trig notes ready when I got an IM from J.P.

JPRA4: Hey! How’d it go today? With finals, I mean.

FTLOUIE: Good, I think. I just had World History and English Lit, so nothing too stressful. It’s tomorrow I’m worried about. Trig! You?

It seemed so weird that we were IM’ing about finals when in less than a week we’re going to be…you know.

And we’ve never even been undressed in the same room together before.

JPRA4: Okay. I’m worried about tomorrow, too…tomorrow night.

FTLOUIE: Oh, right, your big performance in front of the senior project committee! Don’t worry, I’m sure it’s going to go great. I can’t wait to see it!

How can he even care about his stupid senior project when we’re going to have sex? What’s wrong with boys?

JPRA4: It’ll go great as long as you’ll be there.

WHAT IS HE EVEN TALKING ABOUT???? IS HE INSANE?????? SEX!!!! WE’RE GOING TO HAVE SEX!!!! WHY CAN’T WE TALK ABOUT IT?????

At least Michael would talk about it.

FTLOUIE: You know I wouldn’t miss it! And it’ll be awesome.

JPRA4: You’re the awesome one.

We went on like that for a while, each one saying who was the more awesome, but neither of us saying what we really NEEDED to say (or at least what I felt like we needed to say), until I got an IM from Tina interrupting us.

ILUVROMANCE: Mia, I know you said not to talk about this anymore, but this isn’t talking about it. It’s IMing about it. I really don’t think Michael left the party last night because he doesn’t care about you. I think he left because he DOES care about you and he couldn’t stand to see you with another. I know you don’t want to hear that, but that’s what I think.

I do love Tina. So, so much.

But sometimes I want to strangle her.

ILUVROMANCE: I mean, I was just wondering if you’ve really considered all the implications of what you’re about to do with Ja. on prom night. Take it from someone who’s been there. I know Lana and Trisha might make it sound like it’s nothing, but sex is a deeply emotional experience your first time, Mia—or it should be. This is a really big step and you shouldn’t take it with just anyone.

FTLOUIE: Like with my boyfriend of almost two years whom I love to distraction, you mean?

ILUVROMANCE: Okay, I see what you’re saying, and you guys have been going out for a long time. But what if you’re making a mistake? What if J.P. isn’t the One?

FTLOUIE: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? Of course J.P. is the One. BECAUSE HE HASN’T BROKEN UP WITH ME. LIKE MICHAEL DID. REMEMBER?

ILUVROMANCE: Yes, but that was a long time ago. And now Michael’s back. And I was just thinking…maybe you shouldn’t make any hasty decisions. Because what if Lilly tells Michael what she heard in the bathroom today?

I knew Tina was lying today.