Forever Princess
Nowhere. That’s where.
I have to solve my own problems from now on. And you know what? I’m pretty sure I’m ready.
But I didn’t want Dr. Knutz to feel bad, because he had helped me a lot, in the past. So I said, “Dr. Knutz. Would you mind looking at a text message with me?”
“Not at all,” he said.
So we opened Michael’s message together.
It said:
Mia,
I’m not sorry.
And I’ll wait.
Love,
Michael
Wow.
Also…wow.
Even Dr. Knutz agreed. Although I doubt Michael’s note made his heart pound faster—Mi-chael, Mi-chael, Mi-chael—the way it did mine.
“Oh, my,” Dr. Knutz said, about Michael’s text. “That’s very direct. So. What will you do?”
“Do?” I said sadly. “I’m not going to do anything. I’m going out with J.P.”
“But you aren’t attracted to J.P.,” Dr. Knutz said.
“I am, too!” I said. How did he know that? I’d never admitted that. To him, anyway. “Or, at least…Well, I’m working on it.”
Science. The problem is, it’s science. Which I’ve never been very good at.
But there are ways to beat science. That’s what scientists, like Kenneth Showalter, do. All day long. Find ways to beat science. I have to beat this thing with Michael. Because I can’t hurt J.P. I can’t. He’s been too kind to me.
“Mia,” Dr. Knutz asked, with a sigh. “Are we not actually done here?”
Uh…yeah. We totally are.
“I can’t break up with a perfectly nice guy,” I said, wondering if I was going to have to explain my dad’s theory about me being a tease, “just because my old boyfriend wants to get back together with me.”
“You not only can, but must, if you’re still in love with that old boyfriend,” Dr. Knutz said. “It isn’t fair to the perfectly nice guy, otherwise.”
“Oh!” I dropped my face into my hands. “Look, I know, okay? I don’t know what to do!”
“You do,” Dr. Knutz said. “And you’ll do it, when the time is right. Speaking of time…ours is up.”
AAAAARGH!!!!
And what is he talking about, I’ll know what to do when the time is right? I have no idea what to do!
Actually, I do: I want to move to Japan and have food in real plates delivered to my door, living under an assumed name (Daphne Delacroix).
Friday, May 5, 9:30 p.m., the loft
Tina just called. She wanted to know how my lunch date with Michael went. She’s called a few times before, actually, but I didn’t pick up (J.P.’s called a few times, too). I just couldn’t face speaking to either of them. The shame, you know? How could I possibly tell her?
And how can I possibly ever speak to J.P. again? I know I’ll have to, eventually. But…not now.
Anyway, I didn’t tell her now when I spoke to her, either. I just went, “Oh, lunch was fine,” all breezy and casual. I didn’t say a word about old-timey carriages or making out for blocks on end or anything about below-the-neck fondling.
GOD! I’m such a slut!
“Really?” Tina said. “That’s so great! So…what about MHS?”
“MHC, you mean? Oh, fine, fine. All under control.”
A slut and a LIAR!
“Well…” Tina sounded like she couldn’t believe it. “That’s great, Mia! So, you and Michael really can just be friends, then.”
“Sure,” I said. Mia Thermopolis’s Big Fat Lie Number Twelve. “No problem.”
“That’s great,” Tina said. “It’s just that…”
“What?” I said. Oh, no. What had she heard? Had Lana and Trisha finally gotten their rowing under control and followed us? I’d gotten a text from Lana that just said,)(&$#! Which I took to mean Lana had had too much sake at Nobu, a usual event on a Friday.
“Well, I was talking to Boris,” Tina said. “And did you know, he was telling me that the whole time Michael was in Japan—you’re going to laugh when you hear this, I suppose—he had Boris kind of…well, keeping an eye on you. You know, while you guys were in Gifted and Talented together? I can’t believe Boris didn’t tell me before. But he said Michael said not to say anything to me. They’re better friends than I thought, I guess. Anyway, Boris says he thinks Michael’s seriously in love with you, and always has been. That he never stopped loving you, even after you guys broke up. I guess he just thought it wasn’t fair to ask you to wait for him while he was away, trying to prove himself to your dad, or whatever, you know? God, it’s just…it’s so romantic.”
I had to move the phone away from my face, because I’d started to cry. And I was afraid Tina would hear my sniffling.
“Yeah,” I said. “That is romantic.”
“Not like Boris was spying on you, or anything,” Tina said. “I mean, I’ve never told him any of the stuff you and I have talked about. Anyway, Boris told me the reason Michael left your birthday party the other night when J.P. pulled out that ring was exactly why I said…because he couldn’t stand seeing you get engaged-to-be-engaged to another guy. Boris didn’t say Michael said this, but I don’t think Michael likes J.P. very much. On account of him being jealous, because J.P.’s with you now. Isn’t that just the sweetest thing you ever heard?”