He calls me his treasure, for Godsake.

“If that’s all it is for you—” Natalie begins, but I immediately interrupt.

“It’s not,” I say firmly.

“Good.” Jules kisses my cheek just as the DJ switches the song to “Blurred Lines.” “Now, let’s go get our drink on and dance, friends. We have a wedding to celebrate.”

***

“I love your mom,” I tell Jules, as she and I sway on the dance floor, not unlike junior high students at a school dance. We’ve had countless lemon drops, and if we let go of each other, I’m not so sure we’ll stay upright.

Okay, we most definitely won’t stay upright.

“I love her too!” Jules yells right in my ear.

“No, you don’t understand.” I take her face in my hands and hold her still so I can talk to her. “When she was leaving to take the babies home, she hugged me and thanked me for this dinner. She’s the sweetest person ever born. Ever.”

“I know.” Jules leans her forehead on mine and now she’s even more blurry than she was before. “She rocks. I love my mommy.”

“Batting for the other team now, Jules?” Mark asks from a nearby table. “It would be hotter if you two would take off your clothes.”

“The men in this family are all perverts,” Jules tells me seriously. “You need to be aware of this now.”

“Come sit down, Julianne.” Suddenly, Nate is standing next to us, pulling us in to either side of him; his strong arms wrap around our shoulders, and he leads us to a table where most of the others are sitting and talking.

Everyone except Meredith’s best friend Jax and Brynna, who are currently dancing like crazy on the dance floor.

“Wait. Where are Will and Meg?” I ask, as I continue to survey the table.

“They disappeared a few minutes ago,” Isaac informs me.

“Orgasms,” Stacy sighs. “She’s getting some right now, I’ll bet.”

“Lucky bitch,” Sam grumbles from her perch on Leo’s lap. “Are you gonna give me some orgasms tonight, rock star?”

Leo grins and whispers something in his wife’s ear that has her cheeks going pink and she bites her lip. “Hell to the yes,” she says happily.

“You know what orgasms are?” Nic says suddenly.

“Seriously, why do these women talk about nothing but sex when they’ve had liquor?” Caleb asks, as Dom takes my hand and pulls me into his lap. He nuzzles my temple and I easily curl up against him, happily fuzzy from too much alcohol.

“I know what orgasms are,” I hear myself say, and then clap my hand over my own mouth. I can feel Dominic laugh beneath me.

Damn, he’s strong.

“You’re strong,” I say, attempting to whisper, but I don’t think it comes out that way, based on the way the boys all snicker at my comment.

“Orgasms,” Nic continues, “are nature’s way of saying, ‘Yeah, life sucks ass, but here, have some candy.’”

“Does your life suck, little one?” Matt asks Nic, planting a kiss on her hair.

“Not even a little, but you gotta admit, that shit’s funny.”

“Orgasms are so like candy!” Jules exclaims.

Brynna and Jax return to the table, sweaty and panting. Brynna collapses in Caleb’s lap and kisses his cheek as Jax sits next to his man, Logan, who has been content to sit and listen quietly, a soft smile on his handsome face.

“There are some seriously hot men at this table.” I’m mortified to hear the words actually come out of my mouth. “I was supposed to say that for my own brain, but my mouth didn’t get the memo. Sorry.”

“You’re right,” Brynna replies with a smug smile. “We could open a store. Hot Men R Us.”

“You’re trying to sell us off?” Isaac asks.

“I bet we could get a lot of money for you,” Natalie says, and smiles up at her husband. “Especially this one.”

“Plus, Dominic has the sexy Italian speak going for him. Chicks dig that,” I add, and wiggle in my man’s lap. He presses his lips against my ear.

“Keep moving like that, and I’ll need to find a private spot to fuck you silly,” he whispers.

And just like that, my girl parts are wide awake and completely sober.

My brain isn’t sober, but that’s okay.

“I’m so fucking drunk,” Stacy mutters, and rubs her nose on her husband’s shoulder vigorously. “And my nose always itches when I get drunk.”

“Then you’re not drunk enough,” Jules says with one eye closed.

“Why is your eye closed?” I ask her.

“It stopped working.”

“I think you’re drunk too,” I reply with a laugh, wiggling slightly in Dom’s lap and feeling him growl in my ear.

“You know what rhymes with drunk?” Sam asks. “Sex!”

“Nuh uh,” Meredith replies with a frown. “But fuck does!”

“Drunk and fuck do not rhyme,” Mark says with a surprised laugh.

“It’s closer than sex,” she says defensively.

“Everything rhymes with sex when you get to have it with an apa,” Jules says.

“Julianne,” Nate warns her.

“It’s true!”

“What’s that like, anyway? I’ve always wanted to know.”

“You can’t have sex with my husband.” Jules frowns for a second, then a smile spreads over her gorgeous face. “Well, maybe you can.”

“No,” Nate replies quietly, “she can’t. No offense, Alecia.”

“None taken.” I grin at the crazy-hot man. “You’re hot as fuck, though.”

“He really is,” Jules agrees happily. “And the apa…wow.”

“Will you get one?” I ask Dominic, just as he takes a sip of wine, and he immediately chokes.

“Fuck no.”

“Maybe I’ll have to find someone with one,” I say thoughtfully. “Just to give it a try.”

“That’s it.” Dominic stands with me in his arms and doesn’t even set me down as he begins to stalk out of the tent.

“Where are we going?” I look over his shoulder and see the others laughing and watching us leave. I wave happily and they all wave back.

They’re so friendly.

“I’m going to teach you a lesson, tesoro.”