Four Letter Word

I pulled my lips between my teeth, fighting tears.

God …

Sweetest man ever.

And the closest thing I’d ever had to a father.

Tori shook her head at my reaction, then leaned in so we were touching foreheads.

“You’re his other princess, hon. You know that.”

“I know,” I whispered, thinking back to my thirteenth birthday party, which Tori’s parents threw for me, renting out a hall and hiring a DJ and caterer, going all out for their daughter’s new best friend when they didn’t have to and filling that room with so much love I forgot why my own mother hadn’t done a thing for me that day.

She was off finding her peace over Barrett. Peace she didn’t think included me.

Thank God for Tori and her family.

Thank. God.

Breathing deep and shaking off all sad thoughts right now, because this moment was seriously kicking ass and I wanted it to continue kicking ass, I pulled back an inch and slowly lifted my ticket between us, smiling brightly around it.

“I’m so excited I might pee myself,” I admitted.

Tori threw her head back with a laugh, linked her arm with mine, and pulled me in the direction of the stairs.

“Keep it in, will ya? These floors look bangin’.”

I giggled as we walked side by side up the stairs, asking, “Think you can hook me up with something to wear tonight? I don’t have anything fierce.”

“Gotcha covered on that.”

We separated at the top so I could cut a right and Tori could cut a left.

I was fishing through my top drawer for some panties when she popped into my room and deposited an outfit and accessories on my bed.

Little black dress with mesh across the top, revealing the tops of your breasts when worn, and big silver studs clustered in a thick stripe going down both hips to the hem. It was short and sleeveless and breathtakingly expensive, by the looks of it.

Next to it on the bed was a studded cuff bracelet, two choices of choker necklaces, and black sling-back heels.

Fierce. I loved it.

“What are you wearing?” I asked Tori, halting her at the door.

She gave me a wink behind her overgrown blond bangs.

“You’ll see.”

I showered and shaved, slathered on my favorite sweet-smelling body lotion, slid into the dress after deciding on a thong and no bra, thanks to the mesh, and curled and teased my hair, giving it body and height that looked kick-ass paired with my outfit.

I also went to town on my makeup job, keeping everything heavy but the kind of heavy that screamed fierce concertgoer and not back alley hooker.

Dark, smoky eyes, false lashes that flared at the ends, and warm cerise lipstick.

I felt pretty. Really pretty.

The kind of pretty a girl had to commemorate with a selfie, and there was only one person in the entire world I wanted to send that selfie to.

I bit my lip while swiping my phone off the bed and pulling up the camera mode.

I was nervous.

Understandably so. This would be the first time Brian was going to see me.

Like ever.

Heavy stuff right there.

I’d thought about sending him pictures before, but got sidetracked with conversation and his sweet as warmed honey voice I wanted to taste, and all thoughts of pictures would slip my mind. Considering he never asked to see a photo of me didn’t help either.

Since he wasn’t bringing it up, I was hardly thinking about it.

But right now, standing in my bedroom with my makeup done up and my hair looking prettier than it had on prom night, sending Brian a picture of me was suddenly all I could think about.

And before I could think or whisper talk myself out of it, I reversed the camera so I could see myself on the screen, held the device out in front of me and off to the right a bit, pursed my stained lips into a kiss, other hand poised at my chin to blow it, and snapped the picture.

Then I attached it to a text and hit Send.

Feeling WILD.

I wanted to put my phone down. Really I did, especially since I had to snap on my studded cuff bracelet and that required use of both hands, furthermore because Tori had given me a fifteen-minute warning close to fifteen minutes ago, but I couldn’t let the damn thing go.

I couldn’t stop looking at it either.

My stomach was clenched. I was biting my fist and pacing the length of the bed, head down and eyes anxiously focused.

But when the little bubbles floated in teasing intervals on my screen and I knew Brian had seen my photo, that’s when the real panic set in.

Would he like how I looked? Would it be how he had imagined and confessed to imagining countless times late at night to me, or better, would my photo exceed the limits of his imagination and paint a more pleasing image in his mind?

Or would he hate it and me for sending it to him, shattering his dreamed-up spank-bank material and ruining every orgasm I ever gave him?

Shit.

Shit!

Which was it and why the hell was he taking so long to type? Didn’t he know this was killing me?

“Hurry up!” I whispered against the screen.

It started ringing in response to my plea, startling me and nearly slipping out of my hand.

Oh, God, he was calling.

Brian was calling after looking at my picture.

I was going to have a heart attack and never live to see the Pacific Ocean.

Damn.

I held my breath and hit Answer.

“Hey there, Trouble.” I spoke lightly, forcing a smile I wasn’t sure I was going to keep, depending on which way my photo swayed him.

“You fuckin’ shitting me with this, Wild? What are you thinking right now? Huh?”