How to Drive a Dragon Crazy
“What is it, Izzy?” he asked, keeping his voice low. “I know you, Izzy. A cult is after you. Normally, you’d be heading toward them, not away.”
And Éibhear was right. She would be. Annwyl had always taught Izzy to face her battles head-on unless there was a tactical advantage not to. Yet this particular decision wasn’t about Izzy. Not at all.
“When Rhi was young, she told me she had lots of friends. She talked to them all the time. Sometimes Talan and Talwyn didn’t mind about her friends, but sometimes her cousins chased those friends off.”
“They were gods.”
“When I asked her to describe her friends, she told me some were bright like the sun, blinding her. Others were made of earth and shit, but they were ever so nice.”
Éibhear chuckled at that.
“My sister and young cousins talk to gods. Now, a god that none of us has ever heard of and has nothing to do with dragons, suddenly starts a cult.”
“A cult that’s trying to stop you from getting across the desert plains to the Nolwenns.”
“My mum was right. Rhi needs to learn how to control her power. She can’t be used if she has control of it.”
“And saying no to Heru’s escort?”
“I don’t trust him. Do you?”
“Not particularly. But I assumed that was mostly because I didn’t like the way he looked at you.”
“You don’t like the way any male looks at me. Because you’re a very good unc—”
Éibhear’s hand went over her mouth, cutting off her words.
“We go alone,” he said. “First we get to the Nolwenns and then we take it from there. Yes?”
Izzy pulled his hand away. “No. I’m going alone.”
Éibhear laughed. Rather loudly, too. It was rude!
“What is so funny?” Izzy demanded.
“That you think for even a bloody second I’d let you travel into the Desert Lands on your own.”
“I’m not asking your permission, Éibhear.”
“Nor am I asking yours.”
Izzy pushed away from him. “I knew you’d act this way. Don’t you see? With all that’s going on, I can’t afford to spend time watching out for you.”
Slowly Éibhear turned from the wall and faced her. “Excuse me?”
“Éibhear, you haven’t spent that much time with gods. I have.”
“And?”
“And I know how they think. Rhydderch Hael may have interest in you, but he doesn’t care about you. He won’t protect you.”
“And?”
“Which means I’ll have to do it instead.”
“Because I can’t protect myself?”
When Izzy took a moment to think about that, it was Éibhear’s turn to push past her, storming over to his travel bag.
“I’m not trying to hurt your feelings, Éibhear. I just know what the gods can do and now it doesn’t seem like we’re dealing with one god but two. And getting between two gods—”
“Shut up.” He opened his bag and quickly checked it to see what he’d need for his travels.
“Excuse me?”
“I said shut up.” They’d need water and some dried beef before they were on their way. Something he was sure the Sand Eaters would provide if he asked.
“What are you telling me to shut up for?”
“Because you’re pissing me off.”
“And how did I do that? Because I bother to care enough to protect you?”
“No, Izzy. Because you’re being a snobby bitch.”
“What?”
“Were my words not clear?” He stood, leaned down a bit so he could look her straight in the eyes. “I said you’re being a snobby bitch.”
“You son of a—”
“Yes, only the great Izzy knows about the gods.”
“Éibhear!”
“Only the great Izzy knows how to fight against evil and battle zealots!”
“I never said—”
“Only the great Izzy knows how to kill enemy dragons and manage my brothers.”
“I did not say—”
“Only the great Izzy—”
“Stop calling me that!”
“—knows how to be the best warrior in the universe! Anyone else is just someone she has to protect like her little sister or the squirrels around Garbhán Isle.”
“I only protected the squirrels because Daddy kept setting them aflame while laughing!”
“What you, great Izzy, my brothers, and father fail to realize isn’t that I don’t need anyone’s protection. Or that I don’t want anyone’s protection. What you all fail to realize is that I’ve had to learn to protect myself because I was the only one I could rely on.”
“What are you talking about? You have two thousand first cousins alone to watch your back.”
“It is not two thousand. At least not the first cousins.”
“What about a mother who would destroy the world to protect you?”
“My mother would destroy the world for any reason.”
“One sister who’s been known to poison anyone who hurt your feelings.”
“She hasn’t done that in years. Not since I turned seventy winters.”
“Another sister who made one of your warrior uncles cry when he suggested that you were getting chubby.”