Imagine Me

Page 42

“Yeah.”

“What happened?” Winston’s voice is shrill. Terrified.

At that exact moment, more people come running. Winston starts offering people explanations I don’t bother to edit, because my head is still full of steam. I have no idea what the hell Warner is getting at, but I’m also worried that I know him too well to deny his mind. My heart says Castle would never betray us, but my brain says that Warner is usually right when it comes to sussing out this kind of shit. So I’m freaking out.

I spot Nouria in the distance, her dark skin gleaming in the bright sun, and relief floods through me.

Finally.

Nouria will know more about the girl with the scorpions. She has to. And whatever she knows will almost certainly help absolve Castle of any affiliation with this mess. And as soon as we can resolve this freak accident, Warner and I can get the hell out of here and start searching for J.

That’s it.

That’s the plan.

It makes me feel good to have a plan. But when we’re close enough, Nouria narrows her eyes at both me and Warner, and the look on her face sends a brand-new wave of fear through my body.

“Follow me,” she says.

We do.


Warner looks livid.

Castle looks freaked out.

Nouria and Sam look like they’re sick and tired of all of us.

I might be imagining things, but I’m pretty sure Sam just shot Nouria a look—the subtext of which was probably Why the hell did you have to let your dad come stay with us?—that was so withering Nouria didn’t even get upset, she just shook her head, resigned.

And the problem is, I don’t even know whose side I’m on.

In the end, Warner was right about Castle, but he was also wrong. Castle wasn’t plotting anything nefarious; he didn’t send that girl—her name was Amelia—after Warner. Castle’s mistake was thinking that all rebel groups shared the same worldview.

At first it didn’t occur to me, either, that the vibe might be different around here. Different from our group at Point, at least. At Point we were led by Castle, who was more of a nurturer than a warrior. In his days before The Reestablishment he was a social worker. He saw tons of kids coming in and out of the system, and with Omega Point he sought to build a home and refuge for the marginalized. We were all about love and community at Point. And even though we knew that we were gearing up for a fight against The Reestablishment, we didn’t always resort to violence; Castle didn’t like using his powers in authoritative ways. He was more like a father figure to most of us.

But here—

It didn’t take long to realize that Nouria was different from her dad. She’s nice enough, but she’s also all business. She doesn’t like to spend much time on small talk, and she and Sam mostly keep to themselves. They don’t always take their meals with everyone else. They don’t always participate in group things. And when it comes right down to it, Sam and Nouria are ready and willing to set shit on fire. Hell, they seem to be looking forward to it.

Castle was never really that guy.

I think he was a little blindsided when we showed up here. He was suddenly out of a job when he realized that Nouria and Sam weren’t going to take orders from him. And then, when he tried to get to know people—

He was disappointed.

“Amelia was a bit of a zealot,” Sam says, sighing. “She’d never exhibited dangerous, violent tendencies, of course, which is why we let her stay—but we all felt that her views were a little intense. She was one of the rare members who felt like the lines between The Reestablishment and the rebel groups should be clear and finite. She never felt safe with the children of the supreme commanders in our midst, and I know that because she took me aside to tell me so. I had a long talk with her about the situation, but I see now that she wasn’t convinced.”

“Obviously,” I mutter.

Nouria shoots me a look. I clear my throat.

Sam goes on: “When everyone but Warner was basically kidnapped—and Nazeera was shot—Amelia probably figured she could finish the job and get rid of Warner, too.” She shakes her head. “What a horrible situation.”

“Did you have to shoot her?” Nouria says to me. “Was she really that dangerous?”

“She had three scorpions!” I cry. “She pulled a gun on Warner!”

“What else was he supposed to think?” Castle says gently. He’s staring at the ground, his long dreads freed from their usual tie at the base of his neck. I wish I could see the expression on his face. “If I hadn’t known Amelia personally, even I would’ve thought she was working for someone.”

“Tell me, again,” Warner says to Castle, “exactly what you said to her about me.”

Castle looks up. Sighs.

“She and I got into a bit of a heated discussion,” he says. “Amelia was determined that members of The Reestablishment could never change, that they were evil and would remain evil. I told her I didn’t believe that. I told her that I believed that all people were capable of change.”

I raise an eyebrow. “Wait, like, you mean you think even someone like Anderson is capable of change?”

Castle hesitates. And I know, just by looking at his eyes, what he’s about to say. My heart jumps in my chest. In fear.

“I think if Anderson were truly remorseful,” Castle says, “that he, too, could make a change. Yes. I do believe that.”

Nouria rolls her eyes.

Sam drops her head in her hands.

“Wait. Wait.” I hold up a finger. “So, like, in a hypothetical situation— If Anderson came to Point asking for amnesty, claiming to be a changed man, you’d . . . ?”

Castle just looks at me.

I throw myself back in my chair with a groan.

“Kenji,” Castle says softly. “You know better than anyone else how we did things at Omega Point. I dedicated my life to giving second—and third—chances to those who’d been cast out by the world. You’d be stunned if you knew how many people’s lives were derailed by a simple mistake that snowballed, escalating beyond their control because no one was ever there to offer a hand or even an hour of assistance—”

“Castle. Sir.” I hold up my hands. “I love you. I really do. But Anderson isn’t a regular person. He—”

“Of course he’s a regular person, son. That’s exactly the point. We’re all just regular people, when you strip us down. There’s nothing to be afraid of when you look at Anderson; he’s just as human as you or me. Just as terrified. And I’m sure if he could go back and do his life over again, he’d make very different decisions.”

Nouria shakes her head. “You don’t know that, Dad.”

“Maybe not,” he says quietly. “But it’s what I believe.”

“Is that what you believe about me, too?” Warner asks. “Is that what you told her? That I was just a nice boy, a defenseless child who’d never lift a finger to hurt her? That if I could do it all over again I’d choose to live my life as a monk, dedicating my days to giving charity and spreading goodwill?”

“No,” Castle says sharply. It’s clear he’s starting to get irritated. “I told her that your anger was a defense mechanism, and that you couldn’t help that you were born to an abusive father. I told her that in your heart, you’re a good person, and that you don’t want to hurt anyone. Not really.”

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