Love Hacked

“But…but….”

“Do calm yourself, Sandra. I’m quite over it.”

My mouth fell open again—like yodeling open—and I didn’t know if I should feel relieved or outraged.

“Really?” I finally said. “? Glad I’m so memorable.”

He smiled; it was almost wistful. “You are a lovely person. But we never would have worked out. I think a part of me always knew that.”

I nodded absentmindedly, knew my face betrayed how completely agitated his confession made me. “Well, then. Okay. Why are you telling me this?”

“It’s Shirra.”

“Shirra? What about Shirra?”

Thomas’s lips thinned and he appeared ready to burst. Then he blurted, “I love her!”

My eyes budged and I leaned back in my chair. “Oh my!”

He was just full of surprises.

“I can’t help it. I’m in love—completely in love!” He sounded like he couldn’t believe it; like he’d been afflicted with an illness instead of finding a partner.

“Bully for you, old boy.” I gave him a single nod, still feeling a bit dazed. “I say go for it.”

He seemed to sag in relief at my words. Perhaps he thought he was crazy—to fall in love with someone after three weeks. He was right. It was crazy. It was crazy awesome and wonderful. He should be shouting it from the rooftops. Heck, I should be shouting it from the rooftops. Perhaps we could take the Blake Hotel elevator to the top floor and begin this afternoon.

I recovered a bit from the whiplash Thomas’s confession had given me and reminded myself to be a good friend and try to be his cheerleader. “She’s always seemed really nice. I think her parents own the building. You could set up practice in one of the other floors.”

“Yes. Then you can just send your dates upstairs when you’re done with them.”

My mouth fell open for a third time—like dental visit open—and Thomas’s snapped shut. The pink tinge on his cheeks turned bright red, a flustered flush. He was embarrassed by his own words. I loved it.

My laugh was long and uncontrolled and therapeutic. At first, he scowled at me disapprovingly; but after a bit, his shoulders loosened and he managed to join me, adding his unfortunate staccato laugh to mine. This only made me laugh harder.

“Well, where do I begin…?” I said, and wiped at my eyes. “I’m sorry to tell you, Thomas. I won’t be sending any more patients your way.”

His eyes were bright and merry as he responded. “Oh? Why is that? Are you swearing off men?”

I shook my head. “Yes and no. I’m with Alex now.”

“Alex? The young man?” His eyes lost some of their brightness, and he looked a bit worried. “You know, Sandra, Shirra has known him since childhood. He’s a few years younger than her.”

“I know. He told me. He’s twenty-one.”

“Yes, well….” Thomas cleared his throat again. “She seems to be fond of him in a sisterly sort of way, but he’s had some trouble with the law.”

“I know, he told me. He’s a genius computer hacker wanted by the NSA.”

Thomas stiffened then frowned. “I see. And given all of this, you still think continuing a relationship with him is wise?”

“I don’t know how wise it is, but for the first time in my life, I don’t care.”

“Why is that?”

“Because I love him, and I want to have his babies. It’s all I can think about.”

Thomas’s eyes narrowed as though deep in thought, and he searched my features. His frown mellowed into a small smile. “And no crying?”

I shook my head. “Nope, no crying. I’ve cried, but he hasn’t.”

“Hmm….”

We stared at each other for a long moment, sharing a smile. The waitress returned, bringing all three plates of food.

As soon as she departed, he said, “Diagnosis?” And I knew he was referring to me.

Therefore, I responded, “Completely pathological.”

“Prognosis?”

“Not good.”

“Treatment?”

“Institutionalization…cohabitation…marriage.”

“Marriage?” He sounded and looked shocked.

I nodded.

“Huh.” Thomas glanced at my left hand. His eyes widened. “Goodness.” His mouth tugged to the side, his gaze filled with wonder, and he said, “Well, perhaps I’ll join you.”

CHAPTER 30

Tuesday Horoscope: Your happily ever after begins today, as long as you remember there is no such thing as happily ever after.

I was knitting a swatch for a sweater. It was my seventh attempt. I was on my seventh attempt because I was allowing my mood to be dictated by the absence of my husband.

A week had passed with very little in the way of information from Quinn.

To that I continued to say, Boo-o-o and hiss-s-s!

My friends were doing their best to be supportive. Elizabeth and Nico had me over twice. Fiona invited me for the day on Sunday; we played with her kids and that was wonderful. She had cute kids. Also, her husband Greg happened to be back from one of his months-long trips. He was the funniest, most sarcastic man in the known universe. That was also wonderful.

Marie, Ashley, and Kat took me out shopping and we went back to Marie’s place for a home-cooked meal. Ashley wouldn’t let me go pee while we were out, as she wanted me to test her no-pee-purchase hypothesis. I had to tackle her at one point in the public restroom.

Also, they snuggled with me on Marie’s woefully small couch. I craved the physical comfort. It helped my mental stability.

I loved my friends.

Presently, we were in Cloud City, which I’d just decided to start moving into. I figured that, since Alex now worked for Quinn and Quinn was keen on maintaining that relationship, the apartment was fair game—even if it took begging, borrowing, and stealing.

Elizabeth was snuggled up next to me. I wondered if she’d guessed my secret addiction to sharing a friend’s warmth. Regardless, I welcomed it.

Knit night was strangely silent, and I wasn’t the only one sighing. Janie missed Quinn. I missed Alex. Marie was still recovering from her break-up. And Ashley was just acting weirder— more grumpy and argumentative—than usual.

“Well, someone needs to make cocktails. If we’re going to be depressed, then we might as well be on depressants.” Ashley’s voice was monotone, her attention entirely focused on a blue sock she was knitting at breakneck speed.

Janie perked up. “I could go upstairs and get the stuff to make lemon drops.”

“How about margaritas? Today feels like a tequila kind of day.” Elizabeth set her knit object to the side, prepared to help Janie with the task.

“Sure.” Janie nodded and glanced at me. “You want to come?”

I sighed, again. It was probably driving everyone crazy. “Nah. I’ve got a good butt groove going on in this couch. By the way, can I keep it? The couch? When we move all our stuff in?”

Janie shrugged. “Sure, if you want it. Quinn furnishes all the empty apartments just in case a new employee is coming in from out of town.”

“I love that Quinn’s employment package includes a luxury downtown apartment overlooking Grant Park.” Marie laughed. “Why would anyone ever quit?”

Elizabeth sighed. “That’s the idea. He….” Elizabeth abruptly ceased speaking, stood straighter, and glanced over her shoulder. “Did anyone hear that?”

We all held still, sharing shifty eyes. After a long minute of hearing nothing, I heard the unmistakable sound of the apartment door opening.

I bolted to my feet, threw elbows in all directions, leapt over furniture, and clamored against the imaginary crowd within my head in order to reach the front door.

And like a manlicious oasis of magnificence, he was there.

I rushed to him, not caring that Quinn was behind him and might get knocked around a bit, and jumped into his arms. The next thing I did was cover his face with kisses. And then I started tugging at his clothes.

“Whoa!” Quinn intervened, stepping past us and into the apartment. “Can we at least get out of the hallway?”

No sooner had the words left his mouth than Janie came running past me and tackled him to the ground.

She covered his face with kisses and tugged at his clothes.

***

Everyone welcomed Alex back—which warmed my heart to see—and Alex appeared to be a bit overwhelmed by the attention. They’d transferred their love for me to him, accepting my guy as part of our weird, dysfunctional group of loons.

Elizabeth, tactfully, suggested that everyone move upstairs to her place, which would give Alex and me privacy, and Janie and Quinn some alone time at their place.

They cleared out in record time, and I made promises to keep lunch dates, coffee breaks, and breakfasts already planned for the week.

Quinn loitered, though his arms were around Janie like he had plans to keep her with him always. He waited until the last of the knitting group left before leveling me with his glacial glare.

“Make sure he’s at the office in two weeks. No tricks.”

I glanced innocently between Alex—who was suppressing a smile—and Quinn—who was not suppressing a smile.