Much Ado About Magic
“Neither am I.”
His eyes went so wide, they seemed to be mostly whites, and his breathing sped up to sharp little pants. Momentarily forgetting his hostages, he turned to look out the window, and I figured that was my chance.
I spun with a high kick, hitting his hands and, I hoped, knocking away the imaginary gun. He knew the gun was just an illusion, but the other hostages didn’t. The older man threw himself on the floor, grabbing thin air and then holding his hands up as though aiming at the wizard. While the wizard was still shaking his hands and cursing, I dove at him in a flying tackle that would have made my brothers proud, knocking him to the ground and digging a knee into his stomach. Okay, Owen, is that enough distraction for you? I thought.
It must have been, for a moment later, the door flew open and Owen and Mack ran into the shop, both of them wearing official-looking police jackets. At the same time, two other guys wearing FBI jackets burst in through a back door. Both of them held their wrists up, showing wide rubber bands like those fundraising and disease-awareness bracelets. They weren’t carrying guns, which led me to believe that they weren’t real FBI agents. They looked more like TV FBI agents. That or the Swedish water polo team. They were blond, and brawny, with toothpaste-commercial smiles.
The non-FBI guys seemed surprised to see Owen, Mack, and me. For a moment, they lost their pretense of authority as they looked at each other in confusion. “How did you get in here?” one of them blurted before the other could elbow him in the ribs and give him a stern shake of the head.
The second man then glared at Owen and Mack. “We’ll take over here,” he said. “FBI. I think we outrank you local guys.”
“It’s not your jurisdiction,” Mack said.
“It’s part of an ongoing investigation,” the fake FBI guy shot back.
His partner cleared his throat and said, “I think they know what we are. I recognize them. One of them’s with the Council and the other one is that Palmer guy from MSI.”
“What the heck?” muttered our suspect, and I remembered that I was still sitting on him. I figured I was light enough that it wouldn’t kill him if I stayed there until we worked all this out.
“Since you seem to know who we are, who, exactly, are you? You’re obviously not FBI,” Owen said.
“We’re here to help,” one of the blond guys said. “We were able to get through the barrier with these.” He pointed to his rubber bracelet. “So we thought we’d help with the situation.”
The delivery guy and the store staff were all looking at us like we were nuts, and I could hardly blame them. “Um, guys?” I said to the four pseudo officials who were posturing above me. “We have an audience. You can work out who the hero is later.”
“I’ll take it from here,” Mack said, stepping forward. “I’m the real official here. Thank you for your assistance.”
They looked like they might argue, but then the apparent leader shrugged and backed away. “We’ll leave it to you,” he said. The other guy frowned before following his lead.
I eased myself off the wizard and let Mack yank him to his feet. While Mack bound the wizard’s hands with silvery cords, the older man who worked at the store said, “He had a gun, and I got it when the medic kicked it away, but I must have dropped it in all the excitement. It doesn’t seem to be anywhere.”
“We’ll search the scene, sir,” Owen said, sounding very official. “Now, I need you two to leave. There are police waiting for you.”
The woman kneeling by the injured deliveryman asked, “What about him?”
“We’ll see to him, don’t worry.” Owen stared at the two of them for a long moment, then both of them blinked and looked a little foggy. The woman went to the older man, who put an arm around her, and with a last anxious glance over her shoulder, they went outside. The two fake FBI guys went with them, acting like they were the ones who’d rescued the hostages.
As soon as they were gone, Owen knelt beside the injured man, placed a hand on his forehead and whispered a few words. The man’s eyes fluttered closed. “Okay, you can go,” he told Mack. Mack nodded and disappeared with his prisoner.
“The police are still out there waiting for him,” I said. “How are you going to explain the robber who set off the whole hostage situation just vanishing?”
“We’ve got it taken care of,” Owen said. He went to the door and called out, “We’re clear in here. Bring in the gurney.”