Playing with Fire
“You don’t slip into depression. It grabs you by the foot like Pennywise and drags you down a deep, dark sewer full of shit. Depression is never your fault. So don’t apologize for that.”
I couldn’t hold it any longer. My eyes and nose burned, and a hot tear slid down my cheek. I wiped it with my palm quickly.
“We love you, Westie.” Mom dropped her head, burying it in my shoulder. “We love you so, so much. We never wanted the money. We just wanted to talk to you. We want our son back, and we refuse to get a dime from you from this point forward. When Easton told us what you’ve been doing to help us pay our loans, you know what I did?” she asked.
Quickly disowned your son for being so goddamn stupid?
“I slapped Easton in the face for never telling us. For never warning us. You’ve been risking your life every Friday to help us. Please forgive me for not knowing what you went through in the last five years.” She grabbed my cheeks in her palms. It hurt like hell, but now wasn’t the time to point it out. “I know it’s a lot to ask, but I’m willing to work hard to show you what it means to me.”
Another traitorous tear rolled down my cheek.
I opened my mouth and said the two most liberating words in the English language.
“You’re forgiven.”
Grace
The sun had dipped below the tall trees by the time I parked my pickup at the hospital parking lot, and it was almost completely dark. The traffic was insane, there had been two car accidents on the way, and most of the roads were blocked due to festivals. Each moment away from West sent me into the arms of despair, and I was so sick with worry, all anxiety about Grandma Savvy’s first day at Heartland Gardens had magically disappeared.
West was awake when I got there.
Tess was the first to greet me, throwing her arms over my shoulders. “Grace! I’m so glad you’re here. He just woke up.” I patted her back awkwardly, shell-shocked. There was something weird about being on good terms with her again after everything that went down, but if I’d learned one thing from the moment I met West, it was that even though forgiveness is the underdog in the battle of feelings, it should always win.
Easton and Reign were plopped on a narrow seat outside West’s room, napping in positions that couldn’t be comfortable. Tess took a step back, scanning me. “Easton said he asked about you.”
Exhilaration bubbled in my gut, but I made myself swallow it down.
“Is he in a lot of pain?”
Tess nodded slowly. “I haven’t gone in yet. Didn’t think he’d appreciate seeing my face after everything that happened. But Reign and Easton say he’s looked better. Go. He’s waiting for you.”
I pushed the door open just as his parents were leaving. I recognized his mother immediately. A petite woman with striking, dark features. She wrapped her arms around me in a recharging hug.
“Grace. Thank you for coming to see Westie.”
“Of course.” I rubbed her arm, smiling nervously. “I came as soon as I could.”
“I prayed every night that you two would work things out. I’m glad you did,” Caroline said. I grimaced, because West and I were as far as geographically possible from being worked out.
West let a low groan from the depths of his room. His parents blocked his figure, so I couldn’t see him.
“That’s enough, Mom.”
Caroline did an exaggerated eye roll that made my heart surge, because if she could joke about it, maybe he didn’t look as bad as he sounded.
“Take care of my son.”
She kissed my cheek and left.
Closing the door behind me, I spun to face him. Heat crawled up my neck.
He looked horrible.
His nose was misplaced, his eyes swollen and purple, and it looked like he’d been stitched together five times over, bunched into a West I hardly recognized and was a far cry from the flawless Adonis I’d known.
An urgent need to look away took hold of every fiber in my body, but I soldiered through, training my eyes on him.
He loved you at your worst, knowing what you look like. Now it’s time to prove you love him as he is. Scars and all.
“How do I look?” He gestured toward himself with his casted hand, giving me a humorless wink.
“Alive,” my voice broke mid-word. “Which is more than I could ever wish for, everything considered. East told me on the phone you showed up trashed and didn’t even put up a fight. What the hell were you thinkin’?”
With every step I took into the room, my muscles had loosened. His friends had already brought him Coke, snacks, flowers, and an iPad. I hadn’t had time to buy anything to bring to him. I’d driven straight from the nursing home to the county hospital, which was even farther away from Austin than Sheridan. Heck, he didn’t even know Grandma Savvy was in Heartland Gardens. So much had happened in the short time we’d been apart.
“I was thinking I needed to protect you at any cost.” His jaw tightened. “Even if part of the price was getting my heart broken.”
I took a seat in front of his bed, my eyes never wavering from his face.
“I knew after Kade sent people to raid the food truck, that if word got out I had a girlfriend, you’d be a target,” West explained.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” I choked, careful not to touch him. If I started, I’d never stop. I’d hold and kiss and drown myself in him, never coming up for air.
“Bringing the authorities into it was out of the question. My illegal fight scene would have come up, and everyone would have gotten screwed. They wouldn’t have just thrown my ass in jail, but Max, East, and Reign, too.” His eyes searched my face, looking for clues as to what I was thinking. “I decided I’d do whatever it took to keep you safe. At first, I tried to cancel the fight, like you’d asked. Told Max I was out at Reign’s party. Max called Shaun, but he had none of it. See, for Kade, it was a pride thing. So I figured I’d throw the fight, let the asshole get his moment in the sun, and get this nightmare over with.
“But I underestimated just how crazy Kade Appleton is. He nearly killed me before the fight. Had me attacked at the food truck and thrown off my bike on my way home from yours. It wasn’t about money anymore. I wanted to lose so he wouldn’t hurt those around me. Still, I couldn’t dump all this bullshit on you. You had Grams to take care of, a caregiver to find, and Professor McGraw’s threat hanging over your head. I never planned not to tell you, Tex. I just wanted to do it on my own terms.”