She blinked at me a few times—I was never sure how much Dad had told her about Dr. Knutz. But now I know it’s nothing—and went, “Well. After that then.”
!!!!!
Seriously. My grandmother finds out I’m in therapy, and all she says is for me to come over AFTERWARD to change for the speech I am ONLY giving because SHE wants to be a Domina Rei.
I could kill both of them right now. Dad AND Grandmère.
I came home so mad, I couldn’t even speak. I just went into my room and shut the door.
Not that Mom or Mr. G even noticed. They finally got all the seasons so far of The Wire on Netflix and are glued to the TV.
The TV in their BEDROOM.
Because no one took THEIR TV away.
I thought about going in there and telling them—well, Mom, anyway—what was going on. Except that I knew the information would cause her head to explode. Her former boyfriend and his mother robbing a woman of her basic human rights (because that’s what Dad and Grandmère are doing to Amelie)? Mom would be so on the warpath. She would get all her Riot Grrls on the phone and be down picketing the Genovian Embassy in no time. Then if that didn’t work, she’d karate chop Dad in the neck (she’s been working off her leftover pregnancy weight and is back up to her brown belt).
Except…
Except that’s not what I want.
For one thing, domestic violence is never the answer.
And for another, I don’t want my MOM to fix this. I need advice on how I can fix this. ME.
I can’t believe any of this. Can this actually—truly—be my life?
And if so…how did this happen?
Friday, September 24, English
Mia! Are you all right? You look like you didn’t get much sleep last night!
Yeah. That’d be because I didn’t.
Why???? Oh my gosh, did d something happen with J.P.? Or MICHAEL???
Ha. No, Tina. Believe it or not, this has nothing to do with a boy. Well, except my dad.
Did he give you that speech again about how if you don’t study harder you won’t get into an Ivy League school and then you’ll end up married to a circus performer like your cousin Princess Stephanie? Because I’ve been meaning to say, I really think MOST people don’t end up getting into Ivy League schools, and very few of them end up married to contortionists, so I don’t think this is a very valid concern.
No. It’s worse than that.
Oh my God, did he find out about how you were going to give your Precious Gift to Michael??? Except Michael didn’t want it????
No. Something way, way more important…
More important than your Precious Gift? What is it, then???????
Well—
I will not pass notes in class.
I will not pass notes in class.
I will not pass notes in class.
I will not pass notes in class.
I will not pass notes in class.
I will not pass notes in class.
I will not pass notes in class.
I will not pass notes in class.
I will not pass notes in class.
I will not pass notes in class.
I will not pass notes in class.
I will not pass notes in class.
I will not pass notes in class.
I will not pass notes in class.
I will not pass notes in class.
I will not pass notes in class.
I will not pass notes in class.
I will not pass notes in class.
I will not pass notes in class.
I will not pass notes in class.
I will not pass notes in class.
I will not pass notes in class.
Friday, September 24, Lunch period, third-floor stairwell
I don’t even know what to say. I bet the words on this page are all smeary from my tears.
Only I’m crying so hard I can’t tell, since I can barely see the page anyway.
I just—I just don’t understand how she could have SAID that.
Let alone DONE that.
I don’t even know what I was thinking.
It’s just that this is so much WORSE than the fact that my longtime boyfriend has dumped me. Worse than my best friend’s ex claiming to be in love with me. Worse than the fact that my former enemy now sits with me at lunch. Worse than the fact that I’m barely passing Precalc.
I mean, my father is trying to bilk the Genovian people out of their one shot at being a democratic society.
And there’s really only a single person I know of who can tell me what I ought to do about all of this (instead of, like, my mom taking over and doing it all herself).
And she’s not speaking to me.
But I thought we could rise above the petty stuff. I really thought we could.
Seriously. I just felt like I needed to talk to Lilly. Because Lilly would know what I should do.
And what, I thought, would be the worst thing that could happen if I just TOLD her? What if I just walked up and told her what was going on? She’d HAVE to respond, right? Because it’s such an injustice, she wouldn’t be able to help it. She’s LILLY. Lilly can’t stand idly by while an injustice is being perpetrated. She’s physically incapable of it. She’d HAVE to say something.
And most likely, what she’d say was, “You have GOT to be kidding me. Mia, you have to—”
And then she’d tell me what to do. Right?
And then I’d be able to stop feeling like I’m sliding farther and farther down Papaw’s cistern.
I mean, maybe we wouldn’t be friends again.
But Lilly would never let a country be cheated out of government by the people. Right? As opposed as she is to the monarchy?