“Damn it, Fee. Pull away, now.”

His tone snapped me out of my stupor, and I yanked my wrist away from Mal’s mouth. He groaned but then fell silent. I lay there staring at his profile, his blood-smeared lips, and the hint of color in his cheeks.

“It’s working.”

“Yes.” Conah’s voice sounded strained, but when I sat up to look at him, his expression was calm and neutral. “Azazel won’t drink from the wrist. You need to offer him your jugular. But you need to be careful. Steel yourself and be prepared to pull away after thirty seconds. No more, Fee. Do you hear me.”

“Why?”

“Azazel’s aphrodisiac is more potent than a regular blood of Lilith, and he associates feeding with sex.”

Oh, shit. Yes. Azazel had mentioned that. “But he’s hardly in a position to…you know?”

Conah snorted. “I’ve learned never to underestimate Azazel’s abilities.” He shoved off the covers and swung his legs off the sofa he was lying on. “On second thought. Let me come over there, just in case.”

“Are you sure? Are you strong enough to walk?”

He stood and swayed on his feet.

“Conah?” I scrambled to the end of the bed, but he waved me back.

“I’ve got this,” he said. He walked around the bed and then parked his butt on the edge by Azazel’s hip. “Okay, do it.” He reached up and gathered my hair, pushing it out of the way to expose my neck. His fingers lingered on my skin a little longer than necessary, sending shivers down my spine. My eyes fluttered closed, and when I opened them, his sapphire peepers were dark with desire.

“You shouldn’t be looking at me like that.” My voice was a husky rasp.

“I know,” he said, but he didn’t stop staring at me. Instead, he gripped my bloody wrist and placed it on Azazel’s mouth. “This will help.”

Azazel’s mouth parted, and his fangs unsheathed.

“Now.” Conah’s voice was breathless as he pushed me down so my neck replaced my wrist at Azazel’s lips. “Give him a moment.”

Our gazes remained locked, my heart beating too fast, pulse fluttering in anticipation of pain and pleasure, and then Azazel’s arms wrapped around me and his fangs sank into my artery. There was pain, sharp and sudden, but it was fleeting, quickly replaced by molten heat that spread throughout my body in seconds. It pooled at the juncture of my thighs so I was throbbing and pulsing down there with the need to be filled. Azazel crushed me to him, feeding deeply.

Conah’s mouth parted, his breath coming shallow and fast as he watched.

I wanted to close my eyes and surrender, but I had to stop. How long had it been? Should I pull away? I opened my mouth to ask, but Azazel rolled with me so I was trapped beneath him, and he was between my thighs, pressed to my core. His hands were all over my body, touching, kneading wherever he could. And then he began to roll his hips against me, and my resolution melted. My hands slid into his hair, holding tight as he thrust, rubbing against my clit through the fabric of our clothes. Sounds escaped my lips—wanton, hungry sounds. My head was light and floaty as he fed and dry humped me, but then his lips were no longer on my neck, they were on my mouth in tongue-deep kisses that pushed me onto the mattress and pinned me there as he plundered. The mark on my chest pricked, and I kissed him back, just as hungry, just as desperate.

A growl ripped the air, and then Azazel was shoved off me. He resisted for a moment, his hands tightening in my hair, but then he slipped off me and sank into the mattress, back into unconsciousness.

I lay there panting, my body on fire, my blood singing in my veins. “What the fuck?”

“He’s in a healing sleep now.” Conah didn’t sound like himself. His voice was thick, and his tone heavy with desire. “You can get washed up.”

I wanted to move, but my legs weren’t working. It took a couple of attempts, but I was finally able to get off the bed. I stood at the foot of the mattress and looked down at Mal and Azazel. There was color in their cheeks, and their mouths smeared with my blood made me ache to kiss them. I tore my gaze away and found Conah watching me with primal hunger. My gaze dropped to his crotch, where the long, thick outline of his erection was visible pressed against his jeans.

“You should go now,” he said, taking a step closer to me. “Before I forget myself and do something that we both regret.”

I’d never seen him like this, so close to losing control and willing to admit it. Hell, he wanted a reason to lose it, to claim me, to touch me, kiss me, and damn if I wasn’t on the verge of pushing him to do it. The thrill of having him, of tasting the forbidden fruit, of licking it all over, was almost too much. My stomach flipped hard. I squeezed my thighs together to quell the ache and pictured Kiara’s face as I backed out of the room.

Conah’s eyes narrowed, his chest rumbled, and he rushed toward me. Self-preservation kicked into gear as my heart threatened to burst from my chest. I fumbled for the doorknob behind me, twisted, and fell into the corridor. Conah stood braced against the doorframe, teeth bared, fangs unsheathed, his eyes glowing with carnal hunger and primal bloodlust. He was going to grab me and pull me back into the room. He was going to fuck me raw. I made a sound, part protest, part plea.

He slammed the door shut.

Rising on legs like jelly, I rushed down the corridor to Grayson’s main quarters and shut the door behind me, leaning up against it, eyes closed.

I felt Grayson’s presence a second before his hand wrapped around my throat.

“Did you fuck them?” Grayson said, his breath hot on my face.

He needed to get away from me. I was still charged, still high from the aphrodisiac Mal and Azazel had pumped into me. Still wanting from the way Conah had looked at me.

“Did you?” he growled.

Fuck this. I grabbed the back of his head and claimed his angry mouth.

Chapter Eighteen

I kissed Grayson like he was a tall glass of icy water in a fucking desert. Like he was the custard filling in a donut, like he was the cream in my chocolate éclair. Forget the consequences, forget that this couldn’t happen. Forget everything but his mouth and his tongue and his fucking grabby hands all over my body, forget everything but his cock against my core as he pinned me to the door. Forget it all as his hands slipped down my pants, forget it all and let him fuck me with his fingers.

I panted into his mouth, growling with him, grunting as he hit the spot that needed to be rubbed, and oh, God, I was unraveling against him, coming all over his hand, hot and wet, and more, just one more rise. Oh, God. Fucking God.

He slid his hand out of my panties and moved back enough to allow me to stand on my own. I stood, hands braced on his shoulders while my core pulsed and throbbed as if milking an imaginary cock.

“Fuck it.” Grayson grabbed my hair and yanked my head back to claim my mouth once more. “My turn.”

He pushed me onto my knees, one hand still tangled in my hair, and freed his huge erection from the cage of his pants. I was on him in an instant, sucking him deep into my mouth, swirling my tongue around his shaft and pumping him as he grunted and thrust. His grip on my hair tightened, and his pace sped up. He threw back his head, neck corded as he fucked my mouth. And then he pulled out with a grunt, palmed himself, and came all over his hand, hips jerking, eyes fixed on my face.

A sound of protest tore from my throat. I would have swallowed. I wanted to swallow. I wanted him with every fucking fiber of my being. I wanted him inside me. I needed him.

“Oh! Crap!” Cora appeared to my left, slapped a hand over her mouth, and then vanished.

It was enough to smack me with a huge dose of reality. I pulled myself up, body trembling with adrenaline, and brushed my hair back from my face.

“I need to shower.” I strode away from him and locked myself in the bathroom.

“Have fun?” Cora asked from her spot perched on the edge of the bathtub.

“More than I should have.” I began to strip off my clothes. “I can’t do this with him, Cora. You have to stop me. You need to be the voice of reason. I can’t be his mate, and I can’t be part of this pack.”

“Why not?” Cora asked. “You could split your time…”

“Grayson isn’t the sharing type. He’ll want me to commit to the pack, to him, completely, and I can’t give him that. I don’t want to. I want to be a Dominus, and I’m not giving up the guys.”

“You’re in love with them,” Cora said softly. “Fuck, Fee, you’re in love with Mal, Conah, and Azazel.”

My stomach quivered, and I gripped the basin as I steadied myself. My eyes filled with tears, and I shook my head to deny it even as every atom in my body recognized her words as truth.

“It’s okay.” Cora rose and wrapped her arms around me. “It’s okay to fall in love.”

“Not with more than one guy at the same time, not when one of them is already engaged, and the other can’t even accept me as his soulmate. Not when one of them is kissing me one moment and being a bastard the next. They’re messed up and confusing, and God, I wouldn’t give them up for the world.”

“Time,” Cora said. “You have it. Just give it time. In the meantime, you have to follow your gut. What does that tell you?”

“It tells me I need to go home. I need to win my freedom from this world and go back to the Underealm.”

Cora released me and flicked on the shower. “Okay, then get your kit off and wash off the sex and blood. I’ll whip us up some chocolate chip pancakes. See you downstairs in thirty.” She winked out.

I climbed into the shower and stepped under the spray. Pull it together, Fee. Just pull it together.

It was late. Almost one in the morning. The lower level of the house was silent and empty. I was on my fourth pancake when Grayson and Dean joined Cora and me in the kitchen.

Dean poured himself some coffee.

“You want some pancakes?” Cora asked Dean.

He gave her a stunning smile, and I swear if my friend had been made of wax, she’d have melted. She busied herself at the stove. So much for if you want to eat, you need to make the food yourself. Cora had it bad for the beta, and I’d have ribbed her about it if my mouth hadn’t been full of pancake, and my heart wasn’t thundering in my chest at the sight of Grayson’s bare torso.