“That’s common in seizures. Short-term memory loss. I’d say go home, rest, and go to your doctor tomorrow and tell her you had a convulsion. We’ll look around and see if we can find out anything that might be affecting your group. And Lindsey…” Iris paused.

“Yes?”

“It’s not a good idea for you to do magic right now. You just need more time off to rest after giving birth.” The look on Iris’s face told me plainly that she was lying. Whatever might be going on, it plainly wasn’t in Lindsey’s best interest to be playing around with the astral realm, or with anything that might drain her energy any further.

Lindsey nodded, looking lost and bewildered. Shade helped her up and escorted her out. As the door closed behind them, Camille and I stared at each other.

“Am I going to be the one to say it, or are you?” She slumped back in her chair and looked over at Vanzir.

He shifted, darting glances between the two of us. “No way, I didn’t do anything. And from what she described, no dream-chaser demon would act like that. Just too much doesn’t track.”

I snorted. “We aren’t saying you’re at fault, so chill. But it’s obvious something’s gotten into her dreams and also seems to have some control over her in the waking state. You can’t call that convulsion a coincidence, not when she was about to spill the contents of her dream. We’re just wondering if you’ve got any experience with other creatures roaming the Dream-Time.”

Vanzir grumbled but seemed appeased. “I can do some research. Off the top of my head, though, it could be…oh, a number of freaks. Nothing I’m willing to bet on at this moment.”

I glanced at the clock. Fuck. It was time to leave for the VA meeting. “I’ve got to go. Camille, Nerissa, I need you guys with me.” I wanted one of the guys with me but, considering Smoky’s temper, decided to play the better part of wisdom. “Morio, want to join us? Considering the crap we faced last night, the rest of you better stay home.”

Iris returned to washing up. The guys began to grumble about being left home and I finally relented. “All right—one more of you can come along. Roz, you. Smoky—we need you here in case there’s any more trouble. Trillian, too.” That would leave the two biggest egos at home.

As we gathered our things and headed for the car, I realized I had a splitting headache. Stress. You’d think, being a vampire, I’d be immune to maladies such as that, but stress affected everyone, even the undead, though it hit us in other ways than the living. We wouldn’t die from a heart attack if the stress got bad enough, but we could get a mite testy.

As the others shivered in the mist and rising fog that rolled across the lawn, I pulled Nerissa to one side. “I know you’re cold, but I have to tell you something quick, before we get in the car. I don’t want to tell the others—it might stir up an argument.”

“What’s wrong? Are you okay?” Nerissa lifted my chin, leaning down to kiss my nose.

“I met Roman on the Dream-Time. Um…he has a request. And it’s just that—a request, not a demand.” I hurried to say, not wanting her to think it was an order.

She squinted and pursed her lips. “I think I know what this is going to be. The same thing he suggested a few weeks ago, right?” Roman had been teasing us when both he and Nerissa were at the bar with me a couple of weeks back, flirting with both of us.

I kicked a rock across the drive. “Yeah, it’s what you think. He suggested a threesome. He won’t join in unless we ask.”

“You really trust him to not get so excited that he leaps into bed with us and bites the fuck out of my neck?”

“Don’t. Please don’t.” The memory of my fangs slipping into Roz’s neck was still all too painful. I was going to have to tell her soon, as much as I feared doing so. Would she understand? Would she leave me?

“What do you want?” Nerissa stood back, her neck cocked to the right. “Do you want me to do it for you? To help you cement your position? I will, but quite frankly, I’m not that attracted to Roman.”

I looked up at her, my heart melting. She meant what she said. She’d crawl into bed with Roman and me if it meant a boost for my position in the vampire community. And that made me love her all the more.

“I don’t want you fucking anybody you don’t want to—not even to help me. But you need to tell Roman yourself, so he’ll believe you. He promised he’d back off if you said no.” I paused, glancing over at the cars. Camille, Morio, and Roz were taking her Lexus. Nerissa and I would take my Jag. They were waiting for me to head out, to take the lead. I steeled myself and turned back to my love.

“I have more to tell you, and this doesn’t concern Roman, but let’s get a move on. We need to be at the VA in half an hour.”

She nodded, uncrossing her arms, and followed me to the car. As we slid in and fastened our seat belts, Nerissa smiled a tired smile. “I love you, you know. Thank you, for not pushing the issue about Roman. I’ll have to think about it.”

“Save your thanks until I tell you about last night.” I started the ignition and pulled out of the driveway, heading into the fog-laden streets. “Last night, I fed from Roz.” And then, I told her the whole story.

After I finished, I shot a quick look her way. “Do you hate me?”

A brief pause, during which I felt a million years creep by.

Then, “Hate you? Why the hell do you think I’d hate you? You were under the control of a spell. You couldn’t help it—it’s not like you took a long look at Roz and went, Gee, I’d love me some cock and blood. Gonna bite now. Seriously, get real, Menolly. You’re still so insecure about why I would love you, when you’re a vampire? Can’t you just accept that I love you because you are you? Because you’re my sexy, gorgeous partner? I want to make you my wife, and you assume that I’m going to change my mind just because of a spell?”

Oops. I had some backpedaling to do and I’d better do so quickly. I glanced behind me. The others were close on our tracks and I couldn’t just swerve off the road for a chat.

I tried to explain. “I don’t want you afraid of me. It has nothing to do with me thinking you don’t love me. It’s about safety. I fed on Roz—I feel horrendous about that and I swear I’ll never do it again. But what…what if I fall under another spell? What if I attack you next time? I couldn’t live with that, Nessa.” There it was. My secret fear.

Nerissa made a little sound, like a cat, and then laughed. “So, what if I accidentally toss the broom to you and it hits you in the heart? Or what if I buy you a necklace without realizing it has silver in it? There will always be chances for us to hurt each other, but it’s the same for any couple. You can’t protect me from all possibilities. I’m not a little girl, and I don’t need a mommy. I need my lover.”

Relief flooded over me and, ignoring the others behind us, I pulled to the side of the road. Leaning over, I unlocked my seat belt and fastened my lips against Nerissa’s, my tongue probing her mouth as my hands roamed over her body. Oh, how I wanted her. Right here, in the car, naked and under my touch. I wanted to run my fingers over her skin, to lower my lips to her breasts, to make her moan with delight. I wanted to hear her tell me she loved me.

She groaned in my mouth, her fingers slipping under my shirt. “Don’t we have to get to the meeting?” Her whisper was low, regretful.

I slowly edged away. “I want you so bad. Roman’s a fun playmate but there’s nobody in the world I want more than you. Nerissa, how did I ever come to deserve you?”

She laughed. “Just lucky, I guess.” And then, as I disentangled from her and fastened my seat belt again, she touched my arm lightly. “I love you. I love you more than I’ve ever loved anybody. Menolly, you’re the one, you know. The only woman who will ever hold my heart in her hands. I give you my heart. I give you my love. I would give you my life if you needed it.”

And just like that, my fears were quelled, and I held her hand, raising her fingers to my lips to graze them gently. “I never believed I could find love. Not once Dredge turned me. I never dreamed I’d be able to have a relationship, or love, marry, anything normal again. Thank you, for giving all of that back to me.”

She sniffled. “You’d better get this car moving, before I start crying. And Menolly—if it will help you with Roman, I’ll do it. He’s not offensive. But…if he gets rough…”

“If you decide to say yes, and he gets rough, I’ll stake him through the heart.” And with that, I pulled back onto the road, where the others were waiting, hazard lights flashing, and we headed for the VA meeting.

Chapter 8

The VA meetings were held in what had been Sassy Branson’s manor, now known as the Seattle Vampire Nexus—the SVN.

When she’d died—when I’d killed her, to be exact—she’d left it to Wade Stevens, the leader of Vampires Anonymous. The mansion was to be used to help give new vamps a safe introduction into the life. Wade was a former psychologist who had chosen to devote his new life—as a vamp—to helping newbie bloodsuckers adjust. He helped them fit into society instead of turning into the monsters that made everyday citizens want to go all Buffy on them.

Wade and I’d dated for a while, but his mother had been a stumbling block—one I wasn’t willing to skirt around. Belinda Stevens was every woman’s worst nightmare of a potential mother-in-law. And, as we walked through the doors of the mansion, Belinda Stevens just happened to be lying in wait.

“Menolly!” Belinda hustled over. She was a short, stout woman whose upswept copper bouffant was lacquered with so much hair spray that it would take a brick to put a dent in it. Add to the picture a twang that placed her from the Jersey shore and a hideous pleather pantsuit in brilliant chartreuse, and she was impossible to ignore. But Belinda Stevens wasn’t East Coast born and bred. I knew for a fact that she was a Seattleite.

Her beady little eyes latched onto me like I was a duck caught in the crosshairs of her shotgun. I’d rather deal with Gulakah any day over talking to Wade’s mother.

“Menolly, how are you? I see you brought your girlfriend, isn’t she adorable—I was telling Wade just the other day how much I missed seeing you around. I said to him, ‘Wade, why don’t you bring those delightful D’Artigo girls over for tea?’ but he just brushed me off as usual. So like him—you know how it is—sons, they never listen to their mothers! We work and slave making a good life for them but then they just up and grow up. And the pity is I’ll never see grandchildren—but I suppose that no one would believe that I’m old enough to be a grandmother—”

Even five minutes of her nasal yammering was enough to make me want to stake her. And to make it worse, she didn’t need to stop in order to take a breath. “Mrs. Stevens—if you’ll excuse us, I need to find Roman.”

Her eyes glittered, but she opened and closed her mouth like a fish out of water a couple of times and then forced another toothy smile. “I believe Lord Roman is somewhere in the main meeting hall. How lucky you are to have forged such a powerful connection, my dear. And how lucky Roman is to have one of the mighty D’Artigo sisters for his consort.” And with that, she turned her attention to another group of vamps who had just entered the hall.

I looped my arm through Nerissa’s and dragged her into the main meeting room, Camille and the others following.

The hall had originally been Sassy’s parlor and office and a drawing room. Wade had opened up the three rooms into one gigantic meeting space and now we had a lovely, elegant hall big enough to hold more than a hundred people. Which came in handy for the Supe Community Meetings, now that the Supe Community Center had been burned to the ground. They were in the process of rebuilding, but it would be several more months before it would be ready to open to the public again, and the SVN had opened its doors to help.

The room was filling up. Ever since Wade had opened up the Seattle Vampire Nexus and Roman had backed the group, vampires had flocked to the place. Vampires Anonymous had gone from being a small, insular group to having a countywide membership, and now groups were hiving off in other cities like Bellingham, and even as far as Portland, Oregon.

Roman had set Wade in charge of teaching a select group of leaders on how to approach their members. While he couldn’t go out and turn a bunch of shrinks in order to have the knowledge base needed, a few doctors were willing to work with the vampires and train those geared toward the healing arts. We’d managed to form a connection with the medical community that was still tenuous, but growing. And they were willing to work with us to secure vampire rights.

Blood Wyne, Roman’s mother and queen of the Vampire Nation—also known as the Crimson Veil—had sanctioned the Seattle Vampire Nexus and Vampires Anonymous as worthwhile organizations, and I had a feeling eventually she would order all new vampires to attend the meetings.

I still wasn’t sure what she was up to. I’d never had the chance to meet the woman and wasn’t sure I wanted to. Any mother who would turn her own children into vampires in order to keep her “dynasty” intact wasn’t in the running for Mother of the Year. At least not in my book.

I glanced around the room. The hall was set up just the way it had been the first day I’d walked into a VA meeting. I hadn’t wanted to go but Camille had tricked me into it, and I ended up glad I went.

The chairs were set out so that vampires’ living family members were encouraged to sit on the side nearest the door. In case of emergency, it gave the breathers a fighting chance to get away. A table filled with cookies and coffee and soda offered the guests refreshment, and another table held bottled blood for members. Drinking from a living host during the meetings was strictly prohibited.