The Helmet of Horror

Chapter Eighteen


Nutscracker

I mean, who are we going to be?

Ariadne

Papa will tell us that now.

Nutscracker

How ...

Monstradamus: PRE PARSIPHAE HUM HUM MINOSAUR

IsoldA: PRE PARSIPHAE HUM HUM MINOSAUR

Nutscracker: PRE PARSIPHAE HUM HUM MINOSAUR

Organizm(-: PRE PARSIPHAE HUM HUM MINOSAUR

Sartrik: PRE PARSIPHAE HUM HUM MINOSAUR

Monstradamus

No, anything but that! No!

Nutscracker

What? What? No I don't want that either. Nobody does. But why? Why?

UGLI 666

Stay calm.

Romeo-y-Cohiba

Don't panic.

Organizm(-:

Stay calm ...

Monstradamus

Please, no!

UGLI 666

Just relax. You're our head, and that goes through first.

Monstradamus: Wha-a-a! Wha-a-a! Wha-a-a!

IsoldA: Wha-a-a! Wha-a-a! Wha-a-a!

Nutscracker: Wha-a-a! Wha-a-a! Wha-a-a!

Organizm(-: Wha-a-a! Wha-a-a! Wha-a-a!

Sartrik: Wha-a-a! Wha-a-a! Wha-a-a!

Ariadne: Wha-a-a! Wha-a-a! Wha-a-a!

UGLI 666: Wha-a-a! Wha-a-a! Wha-a-a!

Romeo-y-Cohiba: Wha-a-a! Wha-a-a! Wha-a-a!

Ariadne

Hi, little brother. My, but you're ugly.

Organizm(-:

So what, now we'll be the Minosaur. The ancient serpent.

UGLI 666

We always were, heh-heh. That human stuff was nothing but a nuisance. And all that bovine stuff too.

Organizm(-:

We'll be a dragon. We'll fly up to the clouds and dive down to the bottom of the sea. Maybe now things really will be easier.

Monstradamus

Easier? But we've got Sartrik stuck right in the middle of us. Now we'll feel like puking all the time. Constantly. No matter how deep we dive, no matter who we pretend to be. Even Lolita, even a Rolls-Royce.

Romeo-y-Cohiba

But what if Sartrik hits the drink so hard that he slips the hook too?

Nutscracker

Let's not have any gloom and doom. The helmet isn't coming off.

Organizm(-:

But Theseus took it off.

Nutscracker

Maybe he never even put it on. Otherwise where could he have got to? There's no way out of there. There's nothing but jeeps, surf and sunshine. And horror, of course. And I'm not just guessing, I'm speaking as a professional.

IsoldA

But where is he now?

Nutscracker

What does it matter to us? There's no stopping him now.

Monstradamus: I feel sick, xxx.

IsoldA: I feel sick, xxx.

Nutscracker: I feel sick, xxx.

Organizm(-: I feel sick, xxx.

Sartrik: I feel sick, xxx.

Ariadne: I feel sick, xxx. It's time to get out of here ...

UGLI 666: I feel sick, xxx.

Romeo-y-Cohiba: I feel sick, xxx.

Sartrik

And my stomach's rumbling, xxx. Listen, Monstradamus. There's one thing I still don't get. Where did all this happen?

Monstradamus

Are you really that stupid or can you just not sober up? In the helmet of horror.

Sartriks

Oh. And who to?

Monstradamus

You.

*

Disclaimer: Not a single fictitious Ancient Greek youth or maiden was killed during the creation of this text.
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