The Novel Free

The Helmet of Horror



But at the same time, as far as I can tell, no one's made a single spelling mistake yet. Not a single typing error. Doesn't that seem a bit strange?



Monstradamus



That's richt.



Nutscracker



They cantroll our entire canvasation.



IsoldA



Are yew ploying the foul?



Romeo-y-Cohiba



No, I woodn't deram of it.



Monstradamus



Me kneether. It's the mooderattors.



Romeo-y-Cohiba



Step mucking us, you ratten scam!



UGLI 666



There's no point in getting upset, Romeo. It won't help matters.



IsoldA



Have they really stopped?



Organizm(-:



Good for you, Romeo! They did what you told them to. Why not try telling our moderators to do something else?



Romeo-y-Cohiba



Stick your xxx up your xxx and give it a double right twist.



IsoldA



They're following every word we write.



Monstradamus



Maybe that's why Theseus isn't saying anything?



Organizm(-:



What Theseus?



Nutscracker



The one who killed the Minotaur, Organism. Or who has to kill him. What do you have in mind, Monstradamus?



Monstradamus



Maybe he's already here, but he doesn't want the moderator to notice him. And I suspect the moderator's our bronze mushroom.



Romeo-y-Cohiba



You talk about him as if you'd seen him with your own eyes. But we don't actually have any reason to believe he exists.



Ariadne



Who do you mean? Theseus or Asterisk?



Romeo-y-Cohiba



Both.



Monstradamus



And for exactly the same reason, Romeo, there's no reason to believe that you exist.



Romeo-y-Cohiba



That just about does it. Leave it out, will you?



Ariadne



Perhaps Theseus is one of us?



Nutscracker



Perhaps the Minotaur's one of us.



Organizm(-:



I bet a hundred xxx the Minotaur's Monstradamus.



Monstradamus



Stop clowning about.



Organizm(-:



Theseus, answer us!



IsoldA



At least tell us if you're here or not! Theseus!



Monstradamus



By the way. If the moderators can fulfil our wishes, why don't we ask them to open the door?



UGLI 666



But what's outside the door?



Organizm(-:



We can find out.



Romeo-y-Cohiba



You be careful, or the door might really go ahead and open.



Ariadne



I've composed a little poem. Dedicated to Monstradamus.



Monstradamus



Let's hear it.



Ariadne



The Minotaur lurks at the door,



His axe it gleams moon-bright.



'Dear Watson this could not be more ...'



Then silence in the night.



Monstradamus



A bit on the dark side. But maybe I deserve it for being so suspicious.



Organizm(-:



An experiment. Doors, open!



UGLI 666



Lord have mercy!



Romeo-y-Cohiba



I warned you!



Ariadne



Did it happen in all the rooms?



Monstradamus



It did in mine.



UGLI 666



Do you mean the music or the door?



Ariadne



The whole thing at once.



IsoldA



I've got sky outside. Grey. Looks a bit like a park. Everything seems quiet. I'm going out to explore.



Romeo-y-Cohiba



Hey, Isolde, wait! It could be dangerous out there!



UGLI 666



It's dark out there.



Romeo-y-Cohiba



Isolde!



Nutscracker



Did everyone hear the trumpets?



Ariadne



Do you think they were trumpets?



Organizm(-:



Doors, close!



Nutscracker



xxx be praised.



Monstradamus



Organizm, don't go trying any more experiments like that.



Romeo-y-Cohiba



Now how's Isolde going to get back? Doors, open!



Nutscracker



xxx, eh? Again!



Monstradamus



Let's just keep calm and get our bearings.



Organizm(-:



Okay, I think I've got it. When the door opens, a lever shaped like a leg with a hoof moves out and down.



UGLI 666



Lord save us and keep us!



Nutscracker



To make the door close, you push the lever. To make it open, you press on the axe in the middle. So everyone can open their own door when they want to.



Romeo-y-Cohiba



It works.



Monstradamus



What can you see outside the door?



Ariadne



There's another room outside mine.



UGLI 666



Semi-darkness. Benches, a lot of benches.



Romeo-y-Cohiba



Fresh air at last.



Sartrik



Two fridges full of booze. So there is a God after all!



Organizm(-:



Plywood walls painted to look like bricks. It all looks pretty naff.



Nutscracker



I've got a load of electronic equipment.



Organizm(-:



I'm hungry. Hey, you moderators, how's about a bit of nosh down here? Right ... I think I've got it. You have to turn this thingy that way, and then that thingy this way ... Now we're talking.



Monstradamus



What?



Romeo-y-Cohiba



What was it you turned, tell us.



Organizm(-:



They sent down some pancakes with jam. Not bad for Ancient Greece. I feel like a nice quiet meal, so I'm taking a break now.



Romeo-y-Cohiba



Enjoy your meal. Just tell us what it was you turned.



Organizm(-:



When I'm feeding my tum, I go all deaf and dumb.



Ariadne



Organism, you only need to type two words! Then you can go ahead and eat in peace.



Nutscracker



Organism, we're all asking you.



Organizm(-:

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