The Iron Butterfly

I stopped struggling and waited for help. As the pull of the quicksand continued, I searched the crowd and saw Weston standing fifteen paces away; immobile. He didn’t move a muscle to help me; his grey eyes were riveted to me.



When it reached my neck; I knew that no one was going to help me. No one cared enough to help; and that infuriated me. My breathing became ragged and I had trouble focusing, the sand started to fill my mouth and I could only scream with rage. I was not going to be made a victim again. I had one final breath of air and then I was under the sand. It was cool, dark, and slightly moist against my body that felt too warm, too hot.



Pain wreaked havoc on my body. If I could have screamed, I would have as searing light burned through my body into my soul. I heard a loud crack and I felt as if a piece of me was broken in two. Something was wrong, it didn’t feel right. I wasn’t surrounded by light but by darkness.



Power like no other surged through my body, my fingers and bones ached with the electric current and I burned with anger. I wanted someone to pay for hurting me.



I could see with my subconscious; I could see through the sand and see the worry among the Denai students. I didn’t care, I wanted them to hurt.



I saw the light that surrounded Syrani and I pulled at it, her power, life, and squeezed. I could see her panic and start to cough as she tried to catch her breath.



THALIA. This isn’t the way, Faraway’s voiced echoed clearly in my mind, calming me. You must not steal power from others or destroy them, it’s not right.



“Then how?”



You know how.



And I did.



Looking down at myself with my inner vision, I saw that my own inner light was not a bright, glowing white like the other Denai, but full of darkness and shadows.



The Denai power isn’t free. It has a cost, physically, every time they use it. And for whatever twisted reason, I was now able to steal another’s life energy and use it without depleting my own strength. No, not able to, wanted to.



Something was wrong with me, something within me hungered for power that was not my own and it terrified me.



Faraway’s words made me see what I was doing and I released Syrani’s power, released her life. Instead, I reached for my own inner twisted darkness. It crackled; it jumped and flew to me willingly.



And the ground around my feet became solid and rose upwards, I started to rise from the sand like a phoenix rising from its own ashes, reborn with more power, strength and anger. Turning on Syrani, I saw her look of worry and disbelief, and I turned her own strengths upon her; earth.



Syrani began to sink into mud, faster than she was able to control it. I swatted her measly attempts to distract me with moving ground aside as she sank rapidly up to her neck. I walked over to the ground around her and made it harden and crack, trapping her beneath the surface; all but her head.



She struggled, mud dotting her pretty face, and she screamed in anger, “Get me out of here!”



I felt her attempt to move the earth around her, but I nullified it with my own force of will.



“Game?” a Denai student yelled, asking if Syrani conceded the win to me.



Looking up, I had forgotten we were still being judged.



“Game!” she called heatedly, refusing to make eye contact.



My anger which was so evident before dissipated almost instantly. Was that all it took to stop the practice? Was I so focused on being paired with Syrani that I missed the rules of the game?



My skin went cold and I felt the full effects of what I had done physically take a toll on my body. I felt weak, faint, and sick.



Weston dismissed us. A few stopped to help Syrani out of the ground, dusting her off, while others clapped me on the back congratulating me.



Once freed, Syrani stormed out of the arena, leaving a trail of dust behind her. A few hoots and hollers followed and the knowledge that I wasn’t the only one who didn’t like Syrani, would have made me smile if I wasn’t feeling so sick.



A rumble of low thunder alerted me to Weston’s presence. Turning on him in anger I asked him, “Why didn’t you stop her? I could have died!”



“Would you now?” Weston spoke critically. “What makes you so certain you would have died?”



“I… just do.”



“But you didn’t.”



“No, I didn’t.”



“Because…” he asked, waiting for me to finish.



“Because I stopped her. Instructor Weston, you don’t understand, I was dying. I was in pain.”



“And then you fought back, you won, because you were put through the fire, felt its burn and overcame. You’re stronger now, I can feel it. Or are you going to deny that it was really Syrani in danger, not you? It was you who tried to kill Syrani.”



The coldness started to spread throughout my body more as dread crept across my skin. He knew.



“I felt what happened beneath the earth. I was monitoring your life energy, and not once were you ever in danger of dying; after all, this is a special arena.”



“I don’t understand.”



“The arena won’t let you die.”



“Does everyone know about this?” This was absurd, I thought.



“Only the Denai students who have graduated through our program know. I could feel the power surround you and I have never in my life felt such strength, such power. You actually used Syrani’s gifts against her; it goes beyond the safety that is afforded by the arena.”



I collapsed to my knees in the dirt and shook my head, my dark hair falling forward to cover my face. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to.”



“I’ve never seen a Denai do what you did; use someone else’s strength instead of their own. I was about to intervene, when you stopped and used your own. Thalia, how can a Denai do this?”



“They can’t.” I looked up and around the beautiful arena in longing, knowing that I may be giving everything up by my next sentence. “No Denai can,” I whispered.



“Then how?”



“I’m not a Denai.”



I let the words sink in. Hearing them spoken aloud made it seem more real.



“I don’t understand,” Weston frowned. “Cassiel opened for you today. I watched him. I just assumed it was because you were too new into your gifts that the doors wouldn’t open.”



“I don’t know why either. Maybe you should ask him.” Pushing up from the ground, I turned and headed out of the arena. My stomach rolled from the physical exhaustion I felt, and the nervousness I had at the possibility of the doors not opening for me again.



Cassiel didn’t keep me waiting as he opened for me, and I bowed my head in thanks and walked through into the hallway knowing that Kael would be out there waiting for me to silently escort me to my next class.



He was, and instead of heading to my classes, I returned to my room, collapsed on my bed and slept through the night until morning.



Chapter 25



It wasn’t long before everyone had heard what I had done. My newfound confidence brought a spring to my step as I made my way over to Joss for our lessons with Kael. I had been hiding behind Joss’ presence ever since Kael had been assigned as my bodyguard. I made sure that I was with Joss or Garit as much as possible, trying to prove to Kael that he was unneeded and unwanted. Joss also enjoyed all of the extra time I was spending with him.