The Woods Out Back

The great sword swiped about, then again, and a third time, the momentum of each swing bringing raging Robert just a bit closer to his prey. Kelsey didn't even try to parry the mighty blows, knowing that unless his sword angle was exactly perfect, Robert's powerful cuts would surely blast right through his meager defenses.



Normally in such a fight against a larger foe, the elf would hold a wide advantage of quickness, especially with his opponent wielding so heavy and unwieldy a sword. But not this time; Robert swung the blade as easily as Kelsey maneuvered his slender elven sword, and the giant man proved deceptively quick and always balanced.



Again came a mighty swing, and this time, the elf barely managed to get back out of harm's way. Robert's widening smile mocked Kelsey's continuing retreat.



Kelsey was far from ready to surrender, though - not that vicious Robert would have accepted it anyway. He had gone through many trials to get to this point, and now, so close to realizing his quest, the one great task appointed him for his life, his elven blood coursed through his slender limbs with renewed vigor. Besides, the elf reminded himself as the red-haired giant continued to stalk in, he had known all along that the fight against Robert would be the greatest trial of all his life.



Robert's sword whipped across yet again, and once more Kelsey slipped backwards out of reach. The huge man came on fiercely, suddenly, turning his wrists to send his weapon up high, then reversing his grip to angle the sword for a mighty downwards chop.



Kelsey threw his sword up above him, angled diagonally. In typical combat, the cunning elf would have turned his sword horizontal as the blow came in, catching his opponent's weapon on his own blade to fully stop his attacker's momentum chop. From there, a simple twist would throw the attacking sword harmlessly aside and leave Kelsey's foe vulnerable for a counter.



Wisely Kelsey did not try his usual tactics against the inhumanly strong Robert. As Robert's sword crashed in, the elf, instead of turning his sword to the horizontal plane, twisted it vertically and immediately stepped to his left, away from the deflected blow. Robert was quick to recover, but not quick enough to defeat Kelsey's obvious advantage. With Robert's sword far to the other side, Kelsey rushed by the red-haired man's right flank, launching a rapid series of stinging slashes and pokes as he passed.



"Oh, grand move!" Mickey blurted out around the edges of his long-stemmed pipe, clapping his chubby little hands together.



Every onlooker, and Robert as well, thought that Kelsey would then simply run out of range again, putting the fight back on even ground.



None of them, particularly not the dragon, truly understood the fires that burned in the veins of the noble elf.



As Robert spun to catch up with the passing elf, Kelsey cut around in a tight circle, keeping ahead of Robert's blade and keeping Robert's right flank open and vulnerable. The elf's sword hit home perhaps a dozen times in the next frenzied moments before Robert wisely stopped his futile chasing and retreated a few steps instead.



"Oh, grander move!" Mickey called, adding another series of claps. Robert turned an angry glare upon the leprechaun, silencing Mickey immediately, except for a profound gulp.



Gary thought that the huge man would surely run over and slaughter Mickey - and Gary didn't trust that the monstrous red-haired man would stop at that. The weight of doom suddenly heavy around his shoulders, Gary looked to Geno for support. He was not comforted by what he saw, though, for the dwarf had prudently moved a dozen long steps away from Mickey's other side.



But fears of the attack proved unfounded. Robert was too busy in his battle to take any actions against the others at that time. He turned his glower upon Kelsey, then looked disdainfully at his wounded side. His right arm had been opened in several places - one gash had the brute's corded muscles hanging out right beyond his thick skin.



"I had thought to spare you," Robert spat at Kelsey.



"A lie," Kelsey muttered in reply.



"But now you die!" Robert roared, and he came on wildly, sword slashing back and forth.



Despite Kelsey's previous moments of brilliance, Gary found that he absolutely believed Robert's prediction as the next furious assault began. How could anyone - especially one as slender and delicate as Kelsey - fend off or escape the crushing power of Robert's mighty swings? And even if Kelsey managed to stay away, how could he hope to win? He had nailed Robert with many direct hits - strikes that would have killed, or at least stopped, any real human opponent - to no avail, and Robert showed not the slightest signs of tiring.



Kelsey dropped behind one of the few stalagmite mounds in the room, hoping to diminish the intensity of the attack.



Robert didn't slow, didn't hold back his ringing sword at all. Sparks flew as the great weapon slammed against the stone, and when they cleared, the stalagmite mound stood but half its original height.



To the companions' dismay, Robert's sword had not broken, had not even visibly chipped. On came the red-haired monster, his face contorted with rage, his sword humming as it again began its death-promising sidelong cuts through the empty air.



Kelsey did not fear his constant retreating in the vast room, but neither did he believe that he was gaining any advantage, that the great Robert would tire. The elf knew that he would have to continue his brilliance and his daring, and that one mistake would surely cost him his life.



Kelsey nearly laughed at that thought. His life mattered not when weighed against the successful completion of his life-quest.



Kelsey backed and watched, watched closely the subtle movements of Robert's fingers clenched about the huge sword's leather-strapped hilt.



Gary tried to look away, not wanting to see his friend share a similar fate with the halved stalagmite. He found that he could not avoid the remarkable spectacle, though, and his mouth drooped open in confusion when he looked back to the combatants, back to Kelsey, unexpectedly smiling with apparently sincere confidence.



Gary couldn't know it then, but the elf had found his advantage. For all of Robert's sheer power and uncanny quickness, the dragon was not a swordsman - at least not by the elf's high standards. Robert's attacks were straightforward, his movements, even his feints, becoming more and more predictable to the seasoned warrior of Tylwyth Teg.



Kelsey continued to watch those gnarly, huge fingers, waiting for the telltale turn. A few strides, a few swings later, Robert twisted and sent his sword flying up high - and Kelsey was ready for him.



Just like the first time he had attempted the downwards chop, three quick strides brought the red-haired man rushing towards the elf.



Kelsey, though, did not offer a defense similar to the previous one. He, too, came rushing forward, sword leading, desperate to beat Robert to the quick.



Robert's great sword was still up high over his head when the fine tip of Kelsey's elven blade came in tight against Robert's throat.



"You lose!" the elf cried.



Robert roared and drove his sword down at the elf.



Kelsey could have thrust his sword right through Robert's throat - his instincts almost made him do it. But what good to him would be a slain dragon? He dove aside instead, rolling to his feet and pointing an accusing finger Robert's way.



"Treachery!" he yelled, looking to his companions, the witnesses, for support. "I had you bested."



"I am not down!" Robert roared back. "You had nothing!"



"What fairness is this?" Kelsey cried, pleading his case to Mickey and the others, to the stones of the cavern, to anyone and anything that could hear his voice. He turned back on Robert. "Must I kill you to win? What is my gain, then, in this challenge of honor?"



"You had nothing!" Robert roared back, and it seemed to Gary as if his voice had changed somewhat, taken on a more throaty call.



"My sword was at your throat!"



"And mine at your head," Robert quickly added. "To finish your move would have allowed me to finish mine." Robert poked his finger against his own throat. "Small hole," he spat sarcastically. "Perhaps fatal, but not so surely fatal as an elf cut down the middle!"



Kelsey knew Robert's estimate of the fight was far from accurate. He could have driven his sword right through Robert's neck and still dodged the downwards chop. But Robert's argument was convincing, Kelsey knew, convincing enough for the dragon to avoid the mark of dishonor in the general retelling of the fight.



"He's playing Bilbo's game," Gary muttered under his breath. Mickey looked up at him curiously, remembering the story, then nodded his accord.



"Half-truths," Gary went on. "Kelsey had him."



"Tell that to Robert," Mickey muttered. "But wait long enough for me to get far from yer side afore ye do, lad."



Gary didn't miss the leprechaun's point.



"Enough of this foolishness!" Robert roared suddenly. With one arm, he heaved his huge sword across the room. It hit the wall with a blinding flash, and hung in place, halfway embedded in the solid stone.



Gary thought for a moment that Robert had capitulated, had admitted that Kelsey had fairly won.



Sensing the truth, though, Kelsey raced back to retrieve the magical shield of Cedric Donigarten, working frantically to get it in place on his slender arm.



Gary started to question the elf's movements, but when he looked back to Robert, he came to understand, came to understand so very much.



Robert began to change.



The human coil warped and bulged; red hair wrapped Robert's head and blended with his mutating skin. A great wing sprouted, then another, and huge claws tore the boots from the creature's feet. Great snapping sounds of re-forming bones echoed sickeningly through the chamber; a monstrous, scaly tail slammed to the floor behind the creature and rushed out as it thickened and elongated, seeming almost like a second creature.



"Oh my God!" Gary Leger stammered. "Sonofab... Holy Sh... Oh my God!" Gary simply ran out of expletives. His mouth worked weird contortions, but no words spewed forth. If Tommy had been standing beside him and had uttered one of his customary "Duhs," Gary would certainly have patted him on the leg for giving him the right word. Nothing in Gary Leger's life, not the volumes of fantasy reading he had done nor any sights he had ever seen, in his own world or in Faerie, could have possibly prepared him for the spectacle before him.



The chamber no longer seemed so large - the dragon had reached fifty feet long and continued to grow, to stretch. Gary remembered the dry lake, Loch Tullamore, and now he understood how the dragon might indeed have "hissed" it away. He clutched atThe Hobbit, sitting in a pouch on his belt, like it was some protecting amulet, a source of strength and a reminder that others had faced such a creature and lived to tell about it.



But even Gary's amulet could not begin to insulate him from the sheer terror of facing Robert the Wretched. The change was complete then - Robert loomed nearly a hundred feet in length, with spear-like, stone-tearing claws and a maw that could snap a man in half, or fully swallow him, at the dragon's whim.



Gary's knees went weak under him. He wanted nothing except to run away, but knew his legs wouldn't carry him. He wanted nothing except to close his eyes, but he could not, held firmly by the awesome spectacle, the majesty and the horror of the true dragon.



"Enough!" the dragon roared again. If Robert's voice in human form could shake stones, then the power of this blast could surely split them. "The game is ended, Kelsenellenelvial Gil-Ravadry!"



Geno cast a disconcerting look Gary and Mickey's way. "I suppose that the spear will have to wait some time before it gets back in one piece again," the dwarf muttered sarcastically.



"Stupid elf," he added, and his derisive chuckle momentarily freed Gary from his awe-stricken trance.



"You don't seem too concerned," he muttered Geno's way, his voice cracking several times as he struggled to spit out the words.



Geno gave a resigned shrug. "Robert will not eat me," he replied with some confidence. "Dragons are not overly fond of the taste of dwarfs, and besides, dragons like the pretty things a dwarf hammer might bring." Geno's snort twanged against the marrow of Gary's bones. "He'll eat you, though."



Gary turned his attention back to the fight, which seemed more a prelude to a massacre now. Kelsey's smile was long gone, and so was the elf's look of confidence, even of determination. And who could blame him?



"Can we help him?" Gary whispered to Mickey, though Gary knew that if Mickey told him to charge in beside Kelsey, his quivering legs would betray his noble intentions.



The leprechaun snorted incredulously, and Gary said no more. He finally managed to close his eyes and turned his thoughts inwards instead, calling upon the sentient spear, his most reliable battle ally, for some answers to this nightmare.



Kelsey braced himself and clutched his sword more tightly, trying to remind himself of his purpose in being there, of the fact that he had known from the beginning of his quest what creature he would ultimately face.



Rationale just didn't seem an antidote to the sheer terror evoked by the sight of the unbeatable dragon.



Serpentine Robert slithered, belly low, towards Kelsey. He gave a swipe of his huge foreclaw, almost a playful swing, like some kitten with a ball of yarn. Kelsey threw his weight behind the heavy shield to block, but still went sliding many feet across the stone floor.



"Oh, damn," Geno muttered, and turned away, thinking the fight at its gruesome end.



"Oh," the dwarf corrected weakly when he looked back, looked at Kelsey.



Somehow still standing and somehow undaunted, the elf stepped right back and ripped off a series of three short jabs into the dragon's extended arm.



The wind from Robert's ensuing laughter knocked Kelsey to the floor.



"Do not make it so easy," the dragon growled. "I wish to play for as long as I might. Who knows when another hero might be as foolish as you, Kelsenellenelvial Gil-Ravadry?"



"How might I aid my friend?" Gary's thoughts asked the sentient spear.



No answer.



He called mentally to the spear several times, insisting that it communicate with him.



"The fight is not yours,"the spear finally answered.



"I must help Kelsey!"



"You must not!"came an emphatic reply."The fight is a challenge of honor; events go exactly as they were dictated before the elfs quest was undertaken."



Gary started to protest, to argue that no one single warrior could defeat such a beast and that the quest must be abandoned for the sake of Kelsey's life. But then he understood. The spear cared nothing for Kelsey. This battle, carried out properly in accordance with ancient rules, was the sentient weapon's only chance of being reforged.



Helplessly Gary Leger opened his eyes.



Kelsey was on the attack again, rushing in beyond Robert's foreclaws and banging away at the dragon's scaly armor with all his strength. The huge horned dragon head bobbed with bellowing laughter, mocking Kelsey. Every now and then, Robert casually dropped a claw near to the elf, knocking him aside.



But stubborn, incredibly stubborn, Kelsey did not relent, and his persistence paid off.



Robert's lizard-like features contorted suddenly in pain as Kelsey's sword slipped between armor plates and dug deep at dragon flesh. The dragon set his wings into a fierce beat, their wind driving Kelsey back while lifting Robert to his towering height.



Kelsey stubbornly kept his balance, using the great shield to somewhat deflect the blasting wind. He nearly overbalanced when the dragon sucked in its breath, countering the force of the beating wings.



"Here it comes," Gary heard Mickey mutter.



And indeed it did, a blast of fire that seemed to swallow pitiful Kelsey and warmed all the vast chamber so profoundly that Gary, standing many yards away, felt his eyebrows singe underneath his loose-fitting helmet. Robert's exhale went on for many seconds, the white-hot fires pouring over Kelsey, scorching the stone all about the elf's feet.



And then it was ended - and Kelsey still stood! Stone bubbled beside him and the outer metal of the shield of Cedric glowed an angry red, but the elf, even his clothes, and the ground in the protective shadow of that shield, appeared unharmed.



"Damned good shield," Geno said in disbelief.



Robert, too, seemed stricken, gawking at the elf who somehow had held his ground against a blast that could melt stone.



"Ye'll have to do better than that, mighty wyrm," Kelsey chided, apparently gaining some confidence in the proof that the legendary shield could, as the bard's pen had declared, "turn the fire of a dragon's breath."



Robert launched another blast, Kelsey just barely ducking behind the protective shield in time. Now the stone around the elf hissed and sputtered, that sulphuric smell permeated the room.



But when the fires ceased, Kelsey poked his head around the shield - and he was wearing a smile.



Simply surviving Robert's breath was insult enough, but the elf's taunts, and now his smile, sent the dragon into a rage beyond anything Gary had ever imagined.



"Oh, begorra," he heard Mickey whisper, and then came the scraping and pounding of the dragon's charge that tore the cavern floor in its wake.



Claws hammered down at Kelsey, a hit so fierce that Gary thought the elf surely dead. Somehow Kelsey held his ground, but then the terrible maw snapped down, cat-quick, to bite at him. Somehow again - it seemed impossible to Gary - Kelsey managed to dodge, even to smack Robert several times before the dragon got its massive horned head back out of range.



Claws rained destruction, back legs kicked, wings beat down mercilessly, and once, the dragon's tail snapped around with force enough to fell a thick-trunked oak. But Kelsey was ahead of nearly every attack, and those that did connect did no more than slow the elf's own frenzied offense. The slaps of Kelsey's sword sounded as a tap dance, rhythmical and constant, beating at every target Robert presented to him. Dragon fire came roaring in again, but the shield repelled it, and Kelsey even managed to close in under the fiery cover and snap off three vicious strikes.



"That's impossible," Gary groaned, turning to Mickey. The leprechaun was too intent on the action to answer him, but Geno replied, tossing a hammer casually off the side of Gary's helmet.



"Shut your big mouth," the dwarf growled, his unexpected anger stunning Gary to silence.



Robert's frenzy did not relent - Gary came to fear that all the mountain would crumble under the dragon's pounding. But neither did Kelsey relent, snapping, slicing, poking, beating at the dragon from every angle, moving with such speed and precision that at times he seemed no more than a thin blur.



A claw sent him reeling backwards, a solid hit, and as he started forward once more, Robert's great maw fell over him. Gary nearly swooned as the dragon's head came up with Kelsey in his mouth.



Kelsey wasn't finished. Somehow, impossibly, the elf had wedged his shield between the dragon's jaws, and Robert's actions now actually worked against the dragon, for now Kelsey was within reach of the beast's only vulnerable area.



With his slender, wicked sword dancing less than an inch from the dragon's yellow, reptilian eye, Kelsey asked evenly, "Do ye yield?"



"I could breathe you to char!" the dragon hissed between its locked jaws.



"And ye'd lose yer eye," Kelsey proclaimed.



Robert made not a move, considering his options.



"I don't believe it," Gary breathed, his voice full of stunted elation. He just shook his head and stared blankly as the god-like dragon obediently lowered the elf to the floor and released him.



"Bring the ancient spear and be done with it!" the dragon roared, stamping his foreclaws, and several stones in the wide cavern did indeed split apart under the force of Robert's outrage.



"Unbelievable," Gary muttered again.



"Keep quiet, lad," Mickey implored him. "Say not a word and get yer part done as quickly as ye can."



Gary considered the leprechaun curiously, wondering why Mickey was so full of intensity and trepidation. Was that a bead of sweat on Mickey's forehead?



Why? Gary wondered, for the greatest trial had been passed - Kelsey had won. The elf had survived the wrath of Robert, had taken blows that would have toppled ancient trees and flattened mountains...



Gary abruptly halted his confused train of thought. "Ye'd lose yer eye?" he mumbled under his breath, imitating the accent that Kelsey had used when demanding Robert's surrender. Now he understood Geno's anger at his proclamation that Kelsey's feats were impossible.



Gary turned his attention to the scene before him. Robert had started away, shifting his great scaled body to the side, towards a wide and high tunnel running off of the main chamber. Kelsey stood in the same spot where Robert had released him, impassive, apparently basking in his victory.



Gary looked right through the illusionary elf.



"The first hit," Mickey whispered to him, seeing that he had finally figured out the game.



Gary quickly recalled the events of the battle, the first powerful sidelong swipe that Robert had launched Kelsey's way, then looked to the appropriate side. Crumpled beside a stalagmite mound lay Kelsey, curled in a ball and covered in blood. The elf was alive, Gary could see, and trying hard not to make any move or sound.



"You will need the shield," Geno remarked to Gary. With the illusionary scene dispelled to him, Gary noticed the shield lying where Kelsey had first placed it on the floor, beside the scars of dragon fire and the fast-cooling stone. He wondered how he might retrieve it without alerting Robert to the trick, but Mickey was already taking care of that part. The illusionary Kelsey walked over to the real shield and laid the illusionary shield atop it.



It was all very confusing to Gary - and he didn't understand why the dragon hadn't seen right through the leprechaun's trick - but he went over and picked up the shield and followed Geno and Robert into the side chamber.



He looked back as he exited the room, and watched Mickey's illusionary elf go and sit beside the real Kelsey at the stalagmite mound, the leprechaun going as well to tend to the real Kelsey's very real wounds.



Gary slumped even lower behind the shield when he heard the sharp intake of the dragon's breath. He felt like he had to go to the bathroom - feared that he would embarrass himself right then and there. But he could say nothing. The spear was laid out on a flat stone before him and he, as the prophecies dictated, held tight to its bottom half. Geno had tied the two ends of the shaft together with a leather thong and had sprinkled some flaky substance - Gary couldn't tell if it was metal scrapings or crushed gemstones - along the part to be rejoined. Now Geno stood far back, hammer in one heavy-gauntleted hand and bag of the same flaky substance in the other.



Gary reminded himself that he had not actually witnessed the shield deflecting the dragon's terrible breath, that what he had seen had been no more than one of Mickey's illusions. He peeked up over the rim of the shield, wanting to protest, but saw that he hadn't the time.



Then the flames came and Gary didn't know if he had wet his pants or not - and in that heat, they certainly would have dried in an instant anyway! Great gouts of white fire licked at Gary around the edges of his shield; his hand holding the magical spear warmed and then burned with pain. He held onto the weapon's shaft, though, for Geno had promised him some very unpleasant consequences if he didn't.



And then it was over, suddenly. Gary blinked the sting out of his eyes, almost fainting with relief that the shield had indeed turned aside the white-hot flames. On the flat stone before him, the magical spear glowed an angry orange in the dimly lit room. Immediately the dwarven craftsman fell over it, sprinkling flakes and pounding away, sprinkling and pounding. Geno muttered many arcane phrases that Gary couldn't begin to understand, but from the dwarf's ritualistic movements and reverent tone, Gary correctly assumed it to be some sort of smithy magic, a spell to strengthen the bonding beyond the might of simple metal.



The work went on for many minutes, Geno tapping and banging, chanting and sprinkling still more of the flaky substance on the still-hot metal shaft. Then the dwarf lifted the spear up and looked along the shaft, checking to be certain that it was perfectly straight.



He dropped it back to the stone, gave a few more taps, and lifted it for another inspection. Geno's smile was all the answer that Gary Leger needed. The dwarf backed away and slipped his hammer into a loop on his belt.



The glow dissipated; the spear seemed remarkably cool.



"So now you are in the legends once again, mighty Robert," Geno called to the dragon. "All the world will know that it was Robert, greatest of wyrmkind, who gave the fires to reforge the ancient spear!"



The dwarf's attempt to placate the fuming dragon seemed to have little effect.



"Get you gone from my mountain!" the beast roared.



Gary concurred with Geno's nodding head; they wouldn't have to be asked twice.



"Pick it up," Geno instructed Gary, indicating the spear. With one hand, Gary easily hoisted the long weapon. It seemed even lighter now than either of its previous parts, and even more balanced. If before, Gary had believed that he could hurl it a hundred yards, now he felt as though he could throw it two hundred.



The sentient spear did not communicate to Gary in any discernible words, but Gary could clearly feel its profound elation.