Until We Touch

Larissa took a crab puff. “Thanks.” She turned to Jack. “Do you know what this is about? Sam isn’t leaving Score, is he?”

“No. He wouldn’t make that kind of announcement in public.”

Percy pointed across the room. “Melissa’s here. I gotta go.”

He took off before either of them could say anything.

“Ah, young love,” Larissa said. “Better than old love.”

Jack put his arm around her. “You’re not so old.”

She shoved at him but he didn’t budge. “Gee, thanks.”

“Anytime.”

They went to the bar. While all drinks were offered, most people chose champagne. Larissa took a sip and enjoyed the bubbles bouncing off her tongue. She recognized everyone at the party. There were the Score folks, of course, along with the bodyguard-school folks. Noelle and her husband, Felicia and Gideon. Even Mayor Marsha seemed to be making the rounds.

The older woman spotted them, then headed in their direction.

“Jack, Larissa. Nice to see you both,” the mayor said. “Jack, I understand you made quite an impression on the university committee.”

Jack shrugged modestly. “They’re interested in the possibility of starting a football program. I think it’s a good move.”

“You impressed President Newham very much.”

“Thanks.”

“It’s going to be an ambitious project. Finding a coach will be difficult.” The mayor smiled. “Not my problem, fortunately. If you’ll excuse me, I have a few announcements to make.”

“There are announcements,” Larissa murmured. “At a party?”

“It’s a town thing,” Jack told her and tucked his arm more firmly around her.

Sure enough the mayor walked to the bar where she took a microphone from Jo. Larissa hadn’t known there was a microphone in Jo’s Bar.

“Thank you all for coming,” the mayor said. The room went quiet as everyone turned to her. “I have the most wonderful job. I get to live here and know all of you. I also have presided over a number of weddings and I do try to be in the hospital for every birth I can.” She smiled. “After the messy work is done, of course.”

Several people laughed.

“So it is with great pleasure that I continue the tradition of making wonderful and happy announcements like this one. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you Fool’s Gold’s most recently married couple. Dellina and Sam Ridge.”

It took a few seconds for the words to sink in. Sam and Dellina walked toward the mayor just as Larissa realized what she’d said. She shrieked and raced toward her friends.

“You’re married?” she asked, hugging them both.

Taryn joined in, as did Dellina’s sisters and several of her friends.

Larissa grabbed Sam. “That’s what you were doing when you were gone?”

He smiled, looking both happy and content. “I don’t need a big ceremony and the last thing Dellina wanted to do was plan another wedding. This is our reception.”

Kenny and Jack joined the crowd. They hugged their friend and kissed the bride. Everyone looked at the diamond eternity band Dellina wore on her ring finger.

Larissa let the happy feelings wash over her. This was how it was supposed to be, she thought. People in love getting married. Because that’s what people in love did. She wanted that.

Her gaze drifted to Jack. He had his arm around Taryn and Dellina, and Kenny was taking pictures. Sam pushed his friend away and claimed his wife with a kiss that had people hooting. Jack laughed.

Would he ever do this? Would he ever give his heart? She wanted to say he would. She wanted to believe, but she’d known Jack a long time and he always kept himself at a distance. Not getting too involved worked for him. There was no reason to think that was going to change, no matter how much she loved him.

Eddie Carberry, wearing one of her infamous brightly colored tracksuits, walked up to her. “So I heard about those chiweenies,” the old lady said. “I might come by and take a look at them. I could use a little companionship and a small dog would be better for me. I could take him or her to work.” She smiled slyly. “I already have a cat named Marilyn. After Marilyn Monroe. I could name my dog JFK.”

Odd, but okay, Larissa thought. Whatever it took to find the chiweenies homes. “That would be great,” she said. “Let me know when you want to come see them.”

“I will.” Eddie cackled. “Unless you’re feeding them to that owl of yours.”

Larissa took a step back. “I’d never do that. The owl is gone. Released back in the wild.”

“Good to know. I wonder what you’ll rescue next.” Eddie patted her arm. “I’ll call about the chiweenies.”

Larissa nodded. As the older woman moved away, she told herself she should be happy about finding another dog a home. Only she couldn’t seem to find the joy. While Eddie had been kidding, her comment had still hurt a little.

Larissa knew that she might take the rescue thing a little far, but she’d never considered herself a joke. Was that how the rest of the world saw her? And did the opinions of other people really matter?

Or maybe the real question was deeper and more significant. Maybe it went to what her friends had been talking about lately. That much like Jack used distance to keep from truly getting involved, she used her causes to hold the world at bay. Was that what was keeping her from her heart’s desire? And if so, how on earth was she going to figure out how to change?

A problem for another time, she told herself, as she returned to Jack’s side. He was talking to Dellina’s sister Fayrene. She held out some kind of tickets.

“It’s an auction,” Fayrene was saying. “To raise money for the high-school track team.”

“You run track in the spring,” Jack said, eyeing the tickets mistrustfully.

“They’re getting an early start. It’s an evening event with a buffet and it’s not until March.”

Jack sighed heavily. “Sure. I’ll take two.”

Fayrene raised her eyebrows.

“Six,” he amended.

Larissa leaned against him. “You’re such a softy. Besides, the event might be fun. We can dress up.”

Jack shot her a confused glanced. “Why would we—” He paused. “Sure. Dressy would be great.”

She kept smiling and nodded, even grabbed a glass of champagne from a passing server. But on the inside, she felt cold and alone.

Jack’s reaction couldn’t have been more clear. While she was blithely planning their future together, he was assuming she was going to do as she’d promised. Get over him. That by March they would no longer be together. Because while Jack meant the world to her, to him, she was just a friend he was helping out.

He didn’t love her. For him, nothing had changed. And it was never going to.

* * *

SAM AND DELLINA’S party stretched on for hours. Everyone was having a good time and no one seemed to want to be the first one to leave. Jack circulated through the main level of the bar. About an hour earlier, Larissa had dragged him upstairs to try the buffet. Now he watched her talk with Bailey and Dellina, along with several other women from town.

For a while he’d thought something was wrong. She’d gotten quiet. But she seemed fine now.

Conversation and laughter surrounded him. Everyone was having a good time and all he could think about was getting home. He wanted the quiet. He wanted to be alone with Larissa. Everything else was just noise.

“Hey.”

He turned and saw Taryn walking toward him. She wobbled a little as she approached. Which could have been her ridiculous shoes, but he doubted it. He raised an eyebrow.

“Feeling our champagne, are we?” he asked.

She smiled. “Maybe. Why not? Sam finally found someone normal. Who would have thought that could happen? I’m thrilled for him.” She leaned against him. “You know it’s this damn town, right? It’s sucking us all in against our will. I blame you.”

He put his arm around her. “I’m sure you do. However, I’ll remind you there was a legal vote.”

She dismissed that with a flick of her wrist. “It was three against one. And none of you cared that I didn’t want to move here.”

“If we hadn’t moved here, you wouldn’t have met Angel.”

“An interesting point. I do love that man. But you’re trying to distract me. We’re here because of you. You’re the one who suggested moving to Sam and Kenny.” She looked at him. “I think you knew you needed Fool’s Gold.”

As always Taryn found the exact core of truth. Not that he would admit it to her. “Why would I need a place like this?”

“Because it allows you to belong, at least in theory.” She sighed. “I love you, Jack, but you have got to stop protecting yourself. You obviously want to be a part of something bigger, something real, but you’re fighting it at the same time. I just don’t want you to die alone.”

“Sam says I can live over his garage.”

“So he told me. It’s cute now, but will be less of a good story when you’re sixty.” She sipped her champagne. “I’m marrying Angel.”

“I know. I saw the dress.”

Her gaze locked with his. “I want you to be my maid of honor.” Her brows drew together. “I guess you’d be the man of honor. Whatever. I want you to be the one next to me.”

Which was just like her. “As long as I don’t have to wear a dress.”

“I was thinking a nice tux would work.”

“Then I’m in.”

She tilted her head. “You’re sure. It won’t bother you?”

He knew what she meant. They’d been married before. They had an unusual past that could have made things awkward, but didn’t.

“If Angel’s good with it, I’m all in.”

She leaned her head against his shoulder. “You know I’ll always love you.”

“I do. The same way I’ll always love you.”

Like family. Not exactly exes and not exactly siblings. They were connected. And he would happily stand next to her while she married Angel. Whatever romantic feelings he’d once had for Taryn were long gone.

She hugged him, then wobbled off to find her fiancé. Jack watched her go, then shifted so he could search for Larissa.

* * *

AFTER WEEKS OF prep work, Larissa woke up three days before the Pro-am event to find she had nothing left to prepare. She’d confirmed Jack’s team, had double-checked on the sponsors, had coordinated every detail with the people in charge and now there was nothing to do.

She showered and dressed, then fed Dyna and looked at her email. Not much was going on today at all. She had a woman coming by to look at a chiweenie. That appointment was at ten. Eddie had come through and taken one a few days ago. Now there were only two left at Jack’s place.

Work was good, Percy was continuing to study for the GED and, according to Kenny and Sam, making great progress. Larissa decided to reward herself for a calm and organized life by going for a run.

She went down the stairs of her apartment building and decided to head for the park. She would take the trail there. It was a beautiful late-summer morning. There was the slightest hint of crispness to the air. Fall wasn’t that far away.

Larissa started with a fast walk as her warm-up. She crossed the street and wondered what all the trees would look like as they changed colors. She imagined children playing in piles of leaves.

This would be her first year with the full change of seasons, she thought happily. In Los Angeles, the passing months were marked by different clothing in the stores, but the actual temperatures didn’t vary that much. It was in the sixties in winter and near a hundred in the summer. But it wasn’t as if they ever got super cold or had snow. Some years it barely rained.

She picked up her pace to a slow jog. She was looking forward to snow and all the fall and winter festivals. Christmas was going to be great, she thought happily. Beautiful and fun. She’d heard rumors of a giving tree, where you could pick a tag from a child and get them a gift. That would be fun.

She reached the park and started along the jogging path. Her pace increased, as did her breathing. Would she be spending Christmas with Jack this year? Of course, they were frequently together around the holidays, but things were different now. They were together. She spent a few nights a week at his place.

A week or so ago, she would have said yes, of course they would be together for the holidays, but now she wasn’t so sure. While she was supposed to be getting over Jack, she was actually falling for him more each day. He, on the other hand, didn’t seem to have the same problem. He’d been unable to plan for six or seven months in the future.

Obviously her “get over Jack” plan had flaws. Like the fact that spending time with him only made her want to be with him more. And the thought of being with anyone else was horrifying. Which didn’t bode well for her future. She wanted...

She wanted what Dellina had, she admitted to herself. A happy relationship with a future. She wanted what Taryn had. A gleam in her eye when she talked about the man she loved. She wanted to be the most important person in someone’s life. She wanted to matter.

She wanted to be more than her causes.

Larissa came to a stop in the middle of the path and blinked against unexpected tears. That was it, she realized. She wanted to be more than the woman who rescued owls and snakes and chiweenies. She wanted to be a part of something that lasted longer than a temporary rescue. She wanted a family of her own. She wanted love and happiness and forever.