Vain

“It’s so nice to meet you, Sophie!” she sang in a lovely English accent, London if I were to have guessed.



“It’s nice to meet you too, Karina.”



I silently thanked the almost mute Dingane for mention of her name earlier. It would have been so embarrassing not to be able to say her name after such a warm hug.



“I suppose I’ll help Din with that fence then. Let the ladies get acquainted.”



“Yes, yes,” Karina said, shooing Charles with her hand and leading me toward a cluster of buildings just to the left of the main building. She stopped and turned to her left. “Kate! Kate! Please see that all the children wash before bed?”



“I will,” a dark, beautiful African woman answered before gathering children’s hands and singing them to their destination.



Kate was tall and exquisite. She looked like a supermodel, to be frank. If I had seen her in Paris, I’d assumed she was there for the catwalks. It astounded me that she worked in the orphanage when there were so many outside opportunities to be had for her.



“This is to be your bedroom,” Karina said pulling me from my thoughts and pointing to what I thought earlier was an outhouse. I almost blurted, “you can’t be serious,” but stopped myself immediately, remembering the missing arm of the little girl from minutes before. “It’s actually separated into two rooms,” she continued, swinging the door open to the room on the right. It was about as big as the toilet room in my bathroom back home. I peered inside and took in its contents.



Though it had a roof and floor, it didn’t have much else. There was a sink basin to the right but no faucet and a simple bed, smaller than a twin, and no real floor. Essentially, it was uneven planks of wood on the floor, walls and ceiling and a makeshift door.



Karina took in my face and smiled. “It’s not the Ritz, I admit, but it is a roof, my dear,” she added sweetly. “I’ll have Samuel bring your bags in for you. If you have no net, I can provide one for you.” She swung me out onto the red dirt path and pointed to the door next door. “You share a wall with Dingane, but he’s rarely there. Besides, both of you will be so busy and by the end of the day you’ll be so exhausted, your room will be used for sleeping and not much else. Any noise won’t bother you. You’ll get used to the night noises here as well. ”



I gulped, not really sure I could get used to any of it: rooming next to someone who obviously found me repulsive, though I found myself a magnet to, “night noises” or the exhaustion part.



“Have you eaten dinner?” she asked me.



“Yes,” I lied again. Too many butterflies had taken residence in my stomach anyway even if I had been hungry enough to eat.



“Are you sure?” she asked again, eyeing me like a mother hen.



“Yes, Karina.”



Her eyes crinkled around a smile. “Come. I shall show you the showers.”



Karina led me outdoors and back toward the gate where I spied two square hut-like objects. When we came upon them, I noticed they were crawling with five-inch bugs I’d never seen before.



“Oh my God!” I shouted, grabbing onto her arm. I stared at the extreme creatures with the same horror they presented themselves to me with. A land of extremes.



Karina giggled. “They won’t bother you if you don’t bother them.”



“Are-are they always there?”



“Yes, love but don’t fret. You get used to them.”



Oh my God, I’m going to reek like a freak. I’m never going to shower.



“You must shower, Sophie,” Karina chimed in, revealing psychic abilities. “This land is not kind. You must wash regularly to keep yourself free of disease.”



I swallowed audibly. “Of-of course.”



“My dear, we bed early here as we hardly ever have electricity and we like to rise with the sun. I suggest getting some sleep now. I would love to tell you that the water is warm most days but it is not.”



“I see.” I studied the showers with a blank expression. I was essentially going to camp for six months.



When Karina led me back to my room, the sun had set completely.



“Goodnight, love.”



“Goodnight, Karina.”



I walked into my room and almost screamed. Dingane stood there dropping one of my bags to the floor.



“Samuel was busy,” he said to explain his presence. He wanted it known that he didn’t want to be there.



“Ah, well, thank you, Dingane.”



“No problem,” he said, squeezing through the tiny room toward the door. I sat there swimming in the scent of his soap. It made me delirious. My Lord!



He turned around and stood a foot over me, almost skin to skin. “You’ll want to lock your doors so no animals try to get in,” he said and left me to the Ugandan night with the creak of my door slamming shut.



It echoed through me and I sat on my bed, not looking before I plopped myself down right on top of something slippery and moving. Naturally, I screamed and jumped. Dingane came running back into my room. Shirtless.



“What’s wrong?” he asked.



“I-I...” I began but couldn’t finish. I could only point to the long black thing slithering its way on my mattress.



“Oh, it’s only a millipede. Archispirostreptus gigas, to be exact. Take care if you come in contact with one, avoid touching your eyes and lips. They can be harmful.”



“Get it out,” I told him, eyes clenched closed. I heard the door open and shut and when I opened my eyes, Dingane stood there staring at me like I was a fool. “Stop judging me.”



“Who said I was judging?” he lazily drawled. Broad, calloused hands rested on his narrow, exposed waist. I tried so hard not to look.



“I know when someone is judging me. I can read people with impeccable accuracy. You’re thinking this spoiled brat can’t even handle a simple insect. How will she handle Africa?”



“It is not an insect. It’s an arthropod,” he deadpanned.



“So you’re a nerd then. Great, glad we’ve established that.”



He narrowed his eyes. “Yes.”



“What?”



“Yes, I was thinking that you were a spoiled brat who won’t last two seconds here.”



My eyes widened at his candid response. I was taken aback. My mouth gaped open.



“I’ll show you,” I threatened, but it lost steam by the last word as he stared at me harshly.



Dingane rushed me in that moment and the movement stole my breath away. He loomed over me and I fought to keep my mouth closed. “Girl, you are the epitome of spoiled. I can smell it in your expensive perfume, in the quality of your ridiculous clothing, in the bracelet wrapped ’round that delicate wrist.” He closed the gap between us and all the air sucked from the room. “You won’t last out here. You’ll stay blind to the environment that surrounds you. You’ll live in your clean, perfect bubble and return to your posh life come six months. You are....you. I know your kind. I’ve seen it all before. You will never wake up. Not really,” he explained away before backing up and leaving me to my room once again.



I felt tears burn but I steeled myself. My hand clamped my bracelet-covered wrist brutally and I shoved it down my fingers and let it fall to the floor. I yanked the bag I knew contained all my bedding onto the top of the mattress and unzipped it, removing all the contents I needed.



One goose down mattress cover.



One goose down duvet.



One goose down pillow.



One high-quality netted canopy.



One thousand thread count Egyptian cotton sheet set.



I looked down at my bedding and felt the urge to sob seep out of me. I stifled it with a hand across my mouth. I shook it away and stood on the mattress, hooking my canopy net to the hook on the ceiling before shaking out the rolled up mattress cover. I placed everything as it was meant to be, threw off my clothing, put on my pajamas and got into bed. I remembered the lady at the shops telling me to tuck the net into the mattress so I did as she instructed me to. I laid back on the impossibly soft bed and closed my eyes but all I could see was the little girl with the missing arm...



And cried in earnest.



CHAPTER EIGHT



I slept horribly. Terrible thoughts swarmed through my head and it was cold. Horribly cold. Apparently Africa hadn’t gotten the memo that it was August and fifty-degree nights shouldn’t be possible. I tumbled out of bed after shaking out the bugs that had died in my net over the night. I peeked out my door and it looked like the sun was only just rising. I didn’t think I’d ever seen the sun rise before and I watched as pinks and greens, yellows and oranges danced and disappeared over the incredible landscape.



I grabbed my shower caddy and robe and headed toward the showers just to the right of my little hut. I felt so incredibly alone there. I’d always felt alone. My entire life, actually, but this was a loneliness that felt unbearable. I knew I could always find solace in Karina, but I wondered if she’d be too busy to be the friend I needed though I didn’t really deserve one. I knew that. Dingane was right. I was a spoiled, repulsive brat, but I’d never had anyone actually tell me so before to my face. It felt like a slap, but I also felt relief, strangely, something I hadn’t been expecting. I’d never been told the truth so brutally before and it was releasing, not that I’d tell Dingane that. Regardless, he was rude to me and that pissed me off beyond belief.



No one was out then that I could see and I was grateful that I’d have some time to myself before I was thrown into whatever daunting situation I would inevitably be thrown into. I showered quickly and threw on my robe just as quickly, ready to haul ass back to my hut when I suddenly took notice there wasn’t a single insect or arthropod in sight. Huh, was all I could intelligently piece together in that moment.



Back in my room, I dressed in jeans, boots and a fitted button-up, ready for work. I braided my hair in two French braids down the sides of my head, leaving my straight bangs to air dry over my forehead. I tidied as best I could, tucked in my canopy net and stood by the door, my hand clenched on the handle, frozen in absolute terror.



I don’t know how long I stood there before I heard Karina’s voice singing a sweet melody. I peered through the cracks of the wood in my door and watched her stroll my direction, in her hand was the hand of the little girl with the missing arm. I studied the girl, finally able to really look at her.



She was no more than three years old with big, round, beautiful brown eyes, perfectly white, straight teeth and a smile as wide as the Nile. They were singing and laughing together, throwing their hands back and forth without a care in the world. When they got close, I backed away, my calves catching on the foot of the bed letting me know I could go no further.



Karina knocked softly. “Sophie, sweetheart. Are you up?”



“Ye-yes!” I called out after a moment’s hesitation.



“We’re here to walk you to breakfast!” she said cheerfully.



“Oh okay,” I said through the door. “I’ll be right out.”



I stepped in front of the small square mirror that hung loosely above the sink basin and checked myself. Simple makeup. Simple hair. I didn’t think I’d ever looked so droll before. I wanted to laugh at myself. I wouldn’t dare walk into public back home looking like that.