When I Fall

Stepping back, I open the door and head outside before all the blood in my veins reaches my cock. It’s fucked up, but it’s Beth. I’m beginning to realize it doesn’t matter where, when, or what the fuck is going on around us. I can’t turn it off with her. Hell, I’m not sure I want to.

I walk down the side of the house, unsure of what I’m about to get myself into. I know what’s going through my head right now. I can’t imagine amplifying that to the extreme the way Ben does with everything involving Mia. He can’t control shit when it comes to her. I’ve seen him pissed off plenty of times. That’s threatening enough. But angry and upset?

Luke comes into view first. Standing at the back of the property, he’s facing the wooded area that separates Ben’s house from the one behind him. I hurry across the yard as a loud cracking sound breaks through the air, then two more, quickening my pace. It’s coming from the woods. Luke turns his head when I’m almost at his side.

Arms crossed over his chest, he acknowledges me with a quick jerk of his head. “Sorry, man. He needs to break shit right now, and it was either this or Nolan’s swing set.”

I stop beside him and look between two trees.

Ben has a stack of 2x4s I brought over for the deck scattered on the ground. Some are split in two already. He drops the splintered piece in his hand and swaps it out for another, mumbling curses under his breath.

“You try talking to him?” I ask, watching Ben take the piece of lumber and strike it repeatedly against a thick tree trunk. Tiny shards of wood break off with each blow.

Luke looks over at me, the one side of his mouth split open. I stare at the dried blood sticking to the wound.

“Yeah, I tried talking to him. He doesn’t want to talk. He wants to do this. If you think you can calm him down without taking a fucking punch, go for it.”

“Shit.” I rub my hand along my chin. He hit Luke? “If he starts whaling on me, pull him off, all right?”

“Yeah, sure. No problem.”

Ignoring the sarcastic undertone in Luke’s response, I walk through the trees and come up to the pile of wood behind Ben.

If it wasn’t for Mia, I’d still be standing next to Luke, keeping my fucking distance. I’d rather not bleed out in my best friend’s backyard. But Mia’s scared. She called me over here because she’s worried about Ben. I need to at least try and talk to him.

Ben swings the wood across his body and it breaks against the trunk. He turns around, scowling when he notices me, tossing the wood at my feet.

“Shut the fuck up, Reed.”

“I didn’t say anything yet.”

“Yet,” he grumbles, picking up another 2x4 and pointing it at my chest. “I won’t have a problem busting your mouth open either, so don’t fucking test me. There’s nothing to talk about.”

I hold both hands out, palms facing him. “You don’t know anything yet, Ben. Mia could still be fine. All of this you’re doing is just making shit worse for her.”

He drops the wood. “What the fuck did you just say?”

I take a step back when he moves forward, keeping space between us. “She’s scared. You’re fucking scaring her, man, and I know you don’t mean it. This shit can’t be easy on you. I’d be going crazy if I didn’t have any answers yet. But think about Mia. Think about . . .”

“Think about Mia?” he yells, clenching his teeth, moving closer with quick strides. “What the fuck do you think I’m doing, asshole? I’m always thinking about her! She’s all I fucking think about!”

He backs me into a tree, fists my shirt with both hands. Every vein in his neck is threatening to burst. His face is boiling, sweat beading beneath his hair line. Nostrils flaring, he looks ready to eat me alive as he gets nose to nose with me.

“Don’t ever fucking tell me to think about my wife! You hear me?”

I nod.

“Fucking say it!”

“Ben, ease up.” Luke’s voice comes from my right. It’s close so I know he’s moved into the woods.

I hold my hand out, keeping Luke back, my eyes staying glued to Ben’s.

“I hear you, man. But are you hearing me? Mia’s fucking scared. She called us all over here but she doesn’t need any of us. She needs you. And what the fuck are you doing?”

Ben visibly shakes as he takes in a breath. “My entire world is about to be ripped from me.”

“You don’t know that.”

“No?” he challenges. “What the fuck do you know, Reed? Can you tell me my wife is going to be okay? Can you tell me I’m not going to lose her?” Tears well up in his eyes. “I can’t fight this. Do you understand that? There’s nothing I can do if this shit decides to take her. And what about my boys? How the fuck am I going to explain this to them? You tell me how.” He releases me, taking a step back, staring me down for an answer.

I keep my back flat against the tree, letting my hand fall to my side. “I don’t know. I don’t want to think about that.”

“Yeah, well, I have to fucking think about it. I’m going to have to tell my sons their mother is dying.”

“Stop saying that! Jesus fuck!” Luke yells, pointing at Ben. “You don’t know shit right now! Your woman is in there bawling her eyes out, needing you, and you’re out here coming up with the worst possible scenario in that thick as shit skull of yours! Man the fuck up and go to her!”