With Every Heartbeat

“So I’ve been thinking,” she murmured.



I rolled her onto her back and moved above her to trail the tip of my nose down the slope of her breast. This morning, I swore, I would have nothing but Cora on my mind, nothing but Cora in my heart. Whatever she wanted, I’d make sure she got it. “What’ve you been thinking?”



“You know the way Noel proposed to Aspen... It was kind of in public, and yet is was behind that bar and hidden behind all the girls sitting up there so no one else but our group could really see what was happening?”



“Yeah?” I said between batting my tongue against her nipple.



She arched under me and began to breathe hard as she petted my hair, encouraging me to continue.



“Okay, well, I was thinking, I’d want something even more public than that. I’d want everyone to see and know how much you loved and adored me.”



I deserted her nipple and lifted my face to stare into her eyes.



But had she just said...?



She grinned up at me and cupped my face. “As much as I want you again, baby, I don’t have time for another round this morning. I have to be out of here within the hour.”



I frowned. After what she’d just said to me, I was kind of hoping she’d want to spend the entire day together. I didn’t have class, practice, a game, or work...which was rare for me. I was ready to give her everything, especially after she’d just suggested that she wanted to marry me.



“Where do you have to go?” I asked, bewildered.



“Rachel demanded we go shopping.” She popped out of bed, but I just sat there, stumped, as I watched her slip on her underwear.



Then I sat up, running my hand through my hair, wondering how shopping with Rachel could be more important than me...after she’d just had the best night of her life with me and was mentioning proposals.



But she’d given me plenty to think about as she scooted me out the door ten minutes later. Marriage and proposals skipped through my brain.



Even as I thought about all that, I glanced around the apartment before leaving, hoping I’d catch a glimpse of Zoey. I wanted to ask how her night had gone and if her head was killing her as much as mine was killing me. But she was nowhere in sight. So I left without getting to talk to her.



I hid out in my bedroom for the rest of the weekend. After listening to Cora moaning Quinn’s name Saturday morning when I woke, I curled into a ball and cried.



My head was pounding, my mouth was beyond dry, and I needed to pee. But I refused to venture from my room until I’d heard both Quinn and Cora leave.



Once I was alone, I tried watching a little Psych on Netflix. But it reminded me too much of Quinn. When Shawn and Jules finally had their first kiss on the show, I started bawling all over again.



So, I did some homework to distract myself, but biology was what I needed to work on the most. Remembering when he’d helped me study, I, yep...cried even more.



I couldn’t believe I’d almost kissed him. I couldn’t believe he’d turned around and spent the entire rest of night and into the next morning with Cora. I couldn’t believe...well, there was a lot I couldn’t believe, and it was giving me a headache.



When Monday rolled around, I considered skipping art class. What if I burst into tears the moment he walked in?



I knew I couldn’t hide from this forever, though, so I attended. I even arrived early so I could already be in my chair and prepared before I saw him. Except Caroline was chewing on her bottom lip and anxiously waiting for me outside the building.



She leapt forward and grabbed my arm, making me jump. “So how was Saturday night?”



I groaned and closed my eyes, covering my face with both my hands. “I almost kissed him,” I admitted, needing to confess it to someone.



“What?” Caroline gasped. “You...oh my God. I can’t...” She sounded like she was going to start crying, so I dropped my hands and opened my eyes.



Blinking rapidly, she asked, “Did he push you away too?”



I shook my head, confused. “Huh?”



“Oren,” she pressed.



“Oren?”



“Oh my God, Zoey.” She snapped her fingers in front of my face. “Keep up. You just said you almost kissed him.”



What? “No, I didn’t. Why would I kiss him?”



“Because you just said you did...Saturday night...on the date you went on with him.”



I groaned and buried my face back into my hands. “Oh my God, I totally forgot about the date part. I am the worst person ever. Not only did I almost betray my oldest friend, but I almost kissed one guy while I was on a date with another one.”