Without You

“Of course. Yes. Grace will call her right now, and we’ll talk to her.”



“Thank you, baby. I’ll call you in a little bit.”



“Will?”



I grabbed my truck keys and started heading out of the house. “Yeah?”



“I love you so much.”



My stomach did that funny little flip thing, and my heart felt like it skipped a beat. I realized how damn lucky Lex and I were.



“I love you, too, Lex, more than you will ever know.”



I knocked on Libby’s dorm room door and slowly started opening it. I walked into the room and saw my sister sitting on her bed. She had her legs pulled up to her chest as she rocked back and forth. The moment her eyes met mine, my heart broke, and I wanted to kick someone’s ass.



“Libby…Jesus, honey, what’s wrong?” I quickly walked over and sat on the bed.



She threw herself into my arms. “I should have moved into the house with y’all. What did I do? Oh God. Oh God.”



Her body was shaking, and she was crying so hard that I could hardly understand her. I pulled back to look at her and used my finger to make her look at me.



“Libby, you’re scaring the hell out of me right now. Honey, please tell me what happened. Please, Libby.”



She shook her head. “His face. I’ll never forget the look on his face.”



“Whose face? Did Zack do something to you?”



She shook her head. “No, I thought I was ready. I thought it would help me move on and forget…forget…”



I was so confused. “Libby, I need you to calm down. You’re not making any sense, and honestly, I’m ready to go find Zack and pound the shit out of him.”



She smiled slightly, and she started to take in a few deep breaths before letting them out. I waited patiently as she calmed herself down enough to talk.



“I thought I was ready to…to…” Her voice cracked. She closed her eyes and slowly opened them. “I thought I was ready to sleep with Zack. I mean, I like him. I really do. Well, we…”



I grabbed her hand and held it in mine. It was harder than hell to sit here and listen to my sister talk about having sex with someone.



“We had sex. It wasn’t great or life-changing, and it was not at all like how Lex talks about her first time with you.”



She smiled slightly as I grinned back at her. My heart was already breaking for her.



“I thought I wanted it, Will. I thought this might be the final thing that would connect Zack and me…and make me forget about—” A sob escaped her mouth. “Make me forget about Luke.” She began crying but quickly regained her composure.



My heart was pounding so hard in my chest. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to beat the hell out of Zack for touching my sister or fight Luke for pushing her away like this.



“When someone started knocking on the door, I quickly jumped up and put on a robe. I wasn’t even thinking that it could be Luke. He hasn’t even looked my way since…”



I tilted my head. “Since when?”



She swallowed hard. “Since spring break.” She shook her head as if trying to erase a bad memory. “I opened the door, and he was standing there. He asked to talk to me, and I said it wasn’t a good time, but he…he just wouldn’t take no for an answer. Then, he pushed his way in and saw Zack in my bed. He turned and looked at me, and the look in his eyes…” She dropped her head, and tears began falling. “He looked devastated, broken. He didn’t say a word. He just stared at me, and then he left.”



“Libby, shit. You and Luke need to sit down and talk.” I wiped her tears away.



She nodded her head. “In that very moment, I knew I had made a mistake. I knew Luke and I pushing each other away was the cause of all of this.”



She looked into my eyes. Her eyes were so sad.



“But he’s slept with other people, Will. He’s been with Abigail this whole year, and he comes in and makes me feel like I’m the bad person.”



“Libby, sweetheart, Luke hasn’t been with Abigail in months. I don’t even remember the last time Luke went to a party.”



Her mouth dropped open. Then, she turned her head and stared out the window. “But…Abigail told me…I thought…”



“Libby, listen, it’s not your fault, okay? You can’t feel guilty. You and Zack are dating. Luke had plenty of chances to tell you how he felt about you. If he wasn’t so afraid of his feelings for you, y’all would have talked it through and stopped playing this cat-and-mouse game.”