Chapter Seventeen
Robin
I’m riddled with guilt and embarrassment. My parents’ cars are not in the driveway, so I can skip a welcome home greeting with them until they get back home. I go to see Danielle at her apartment above their detached garage. It’s hard to hug her right now, but this conversation we’re about to have will bring up the past. Big, tight hug it is.
“How was the trip?” I ask her, warming her up before I drop a bomb.
“Amazing,” she chirps. “But don’t worry about that. How are you? I’m so sorry to hear about the fire. God, you must have been so terrified.”
“It was truly tragic, sis. Everything’s gone. They won’t even let me enter the premises yet. I feel like I’m in limbo right now. Everything is surreal. Hey, let’s talk about your trip.”
Her face is beaming as she goes on about their visit to the Space Needle, hiking in the Mount Rainer National Park, and navigating the trails of the Hoh Rainforest. I can’t remember the last time I’ve seen her this happy. The temptation to forget all about telling her anything to do with Reid crosses my mind. Is it worth it to raise the topic of Reid’s accusation? Can she handle yet another world of pain? Do I really want to let Reid come between us? I have no answers.
Danielle points at her suitcase at one side of the bed. “I got you something. Look in the top corner.”
I don’t deserve a gift. God, I hate feeling guilty. She sees me hovering over her half-zippered suitcase and comes beside me.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” she asks. “I guess I should stop asking that question. I hate when people ask me that. And you just lost everything. I’m so inconsiderate.”
She’s inconsiderate? Good Lord.
She pulls the zipper to the main compartment the rest of the way, rummages around the upper half of the clothes, and retracts a pale pink top. “It’s a Jimi Hendrix t-shirt!” she squeals with delight.
“Awww, thank you so much,” I tell her, trying to conceal some of the flat-out misery I’m feeling.
Danielle has always been intuitive. She senses something is wrong, and assumes I’m disappointed. “I know he was an electric guitarist and that you’re more into acoustics, but I thought you’d love it since he’s such a legend.”
“I do love it,” I stress. “It’s gorgeous. Perfect. And my favorite color too.”
She’s still not convinced. “Maybe I should have bought a few of those snow globes Mom and Dad brought back as souvenirs.”
“No, hun. I love this. I wouldn’t know what to do with trinkets. Especially now. And I’ll actually wear this t-shirt. It’s great, hun.”
“I’m glad you like it,” she says with a smile, finally satisfied that my weirdness has nothing to do with her gift.
With Reid’s car in the driveway, if Mom and Dad show up now, they’ll come up here while we’re talking. I can’t risk having to turn this into a super-awkward family meeting, so I bite the bullet.
“Danielle?”
“Yes?”
“I’m so sorry to have to bring this up, but can I talk to you about something that I know you’ll be upset about?”
She shrugs her shoulders, and her lips form a thin line. “Go ahead.”
“It’s about…you and Reid.”
She flops back into bed. “He’s back in town. I know.”
“Okay. I was also going to tell you that although he’s been a big help while you, Mom and Dad were out of town, I also think he’s a low-down, dirty liar.”
“Some men lie. I would say Reid is more secretive than a liar.”
“Hmmm. Well, he lied about you, and I’m mad as hell.”
She lifts her torso off the bed, holding up her weight with her elbows. “About what?”
“Um…” I start, but can’t bring myself to say it.
“Come on. Tell me.”
“You know what? Forget it. He’s an idiot. It’s not worth mentioning.”
“No, I want to hear what he said. Tell me.”
“I can’t. It’s mean and heartless.”
Danielle glares at me. “Tell me!” she demands.
“All right. He said that when he left town to join the army, you were a virgin…that he did not get you pregnant…I know, right? Lying bastard.”
Dead silence.
Danielle’s face turns green, and after about a minute of shooting me an incredulous stare, she rockets out of bed and runs to the apartment door, locking both the main doorknob and the security chain.
“Did you tell any of this to anyone at all?” she asks, frantic.
“No. Because it’s not true… right?”
She leans back against the door. A second later, her legs buckle and she crumples to the floor. Tears fall. Her body heaves.
“Danielle?” I repeat her name to get her attention.
“It’s true.”
Mary Mother of God.
It’s true?
What sorcery is this?
I cross my legs and sit beside her, pulling her into my arms to help her calm down. “It’s true? Good Lord. I’m sorry, Danielle, I shouldn’t have asked. I mean, I didn’t know you’d be this upset… or that it would end up being true. It’s okay. Whatever it is that happened, it’s in the past. None of it matters.”
I’m lying my ass off right now. It matters, all right. Reid’s reputation is shit in my household. I have no doubt that if my father or big brother ever sees Reid in person, violence against him will follow. Slurs will be hurled. Shit will hit the fan. And all of that slow-burning wrath in waiting is sure to be compounded by one thousand if I spend more time getting to know him. He’ll go from persona non grata to lets’ form an angry mob and chase him out of state.
“I wanted to tell you,” she admits in between sniffles and sobs. “I couldn’t.”
I rub her back and pull her tighter to my side. “You can tell me all about it now, or whenever you’re ready. It’s okay.”
“No, it’s not. I was so upset that he left, I lashed out. I slept with one of the guys in our senior year. It was a one-time thing, and when I got pregnant, I couldn’t hurt Mom and Dad that way, you know? It was easier to say that Reid did it… to blame him. God, I should have told you the truth. I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t be. It’s over and done with. And I won’t say a word to anyone.”
“Thank you, Robin…but it’s okay now.”
I study her face. “Mom and Dad know?”
She nods.
“What about Josh?”
“Yes. I should have told you too.”
I should be mad as hell for being left out of this family secret, but the big picture is it makes my being with Reid a whole lot easier. “It’s totally okay, sis.”
“Though… I wonder why he told you after all this time.”
Crap.
This time, the dead silence is on my end. She looks over at me. “Do you have any idea why he said anything?”
“It’s my fault. I confronted him and accused him of hurting you… because something happened between Reid and me in the last few days,” I admit.
“You and Reid.” Her crying ceases, and her eyes narrow as she studies me, now armed with this chilling new information. I’m not sure if to expect her to pass out from the heartbreak that I broke a cardinal rule of sisterhood, or if she’ll reach her hands up and rip every strand of hair from my head. “You slept with Reid?”
I rest my head in my hands. I want to die from shame. “Yes. I know, I’m a total slut. I am so sorry. It won’t happen again, Danielle. I promise.”
“You and Reid.” This time, she nods as she repeats it.
“Feel free to bitch-slap me, anytime at all.”
“I won’t, and I believe I can live with that.”
“What? Why?”
Danielle pushes off the floor with both hands and gets to her feet. She wipes the tears and snot off her face with the back of her hand. “Because…because me and Barclay.”
I look up at her from my spot on the floor. It’s a good thing I’m sitting down. She and Barclay? They can’t be any more different from each other. They’re like comparing oil and water. Night and day. Country western music and Goth. But Barclay is a sweetie. He’s sensitive, feels emotions so deeply, on a level that’s more empathetic than most men, and he would never hurt Danielle.
“You and Barclay?”
She nods. “Yes.”
“How long?”
She covers her eyes in embarrassment. “A year.”
“Jesus. You’re a vault! Barclay too! You’ve been seeing each other for a whole year?”
It takes me a while to think back. Yes. It makes perfect sense. The hushed tones. Her unexpected appearances at some of our gigs that I had never mentioned to her. The other night at the bar when Barclay went off the deep end that I sang that angry, sad song for Reid. That time I walked into Mom’s pantry and found him picking food from her hair.
“I’m the only one who doesn’t know too, right?” She doesn’t answer, but I don’t need words. It’s written all over her face. “Did he even go to Amargosa Valley at all? Or was he in the damned camper van road trip with you, Mom and Dad? Wait. Don’t bother answering. I can tell…and I think I can live with that too, sis.”
“Thank God! It’s been hard sneaking around behind your back.”
“You don’t have to anymore. And I won’t do any tiptoeing of any kind with Reid.”
“Great!”
“For now, we’re just starting to get to know each other, so let’s just leave it at that. I haven’t spent that much time with him.”
“Okay.”
The loaner phone buzzes in my pocket. “It must be Reid. That reminds me. I have to give him the meekest, sweetest apology for treating him like shit and accusing him of lying his ass off.” There’s a clicking sound at the door as I answer the phone. “Hi Reid. Can you hold a second?”
“Sure,” he answers.
I mute the line. “But first, we’d better unlock the door for Mom and Dad before they wonder whose SUV is outside.”
“True. Coming, Mom,” Danielle shouts, reaching for the door to unlock it.
I turn off the mute feature on the phone. “Hi Reid. Hey, I need to apologize for what I said earlier.”
“Forget about that for a second. Is he there?”
“Who?”
“Dave.”
“Why would he be here?”
“Get out of there now! Get in my car and bring your sister and parents to my place. Now. I’ll explain later.”
“You’re not making sense, Reid.”
“Robin! Listen to me. Leave the house now!”
“We’re not in the house. We’re in the apartment above the garage.”
Out of the corner of my eye, I notice that Danielle is jiggling the door knob. “That’s strange,” she says.
I cover the phone ear speaker to block out Reid’s hysterics. “What is?”
“It’s not opening. Mom?” she calls through the door. “Really funny, Mom, locking us in from out there.”
No one answers.
Danielle pounds on the door. “Mom?”
I swallow hard. “Reid?” I shout into the phone, but the call must have disconnected. Reid’s words sink in when I start to smell smoke. I hear a car horn blaring from outside, so I look out the front window.
Good Lord, no.
Dave?
Hasn’t this man done enough? Apparently not.
“Call 9-1-1!” I tell my sister.
Sliding open the double-hung casement window transports me back to my panic-stricken state as I relive the last fire he caused. Except now, Danielle is with me, we’re on the second floor, this window is metal and only opens about four inches, and Reid is not here to save us.
“Dave, unlock this door right now!” I scream down at him.
“Or what?” he smugly shouts back.
“You won’t get away with this!”
“I have before, and even if I don’t, I’ve got nothing more to lose.”
“Please, just open the door. Danielle is here. She’s done nothing to you.”
“Collateral damage is inevitable, Robin.”
“Why do you want to hurt me like this?” I plead.
“Maybe you should give me an answer to the same question.”
“Please don’t do this.”
“Tell me something. Do you think I’ll miss you when you’re gone?”
I don’t have a comeback for that stupid question. Dave is not going to let us go. I ignore him altogether and turn to Danielle after she ends the 9-1-1 call.
“What do you have around here that can break through the glass in this window?”
It’s time for us to save ourselves.
Otherwise, one wrong move and we both go up in flames.