Aidan looked down at the woman in his arms as he ascended the stairs that led to his estate. He felt, for the first time in many long years, glad to be alive, like all of his cares had been erased.
Logically, he knew this wasn’t true. One obstacle had been removed, but, no doubt, many more remained. But she was here with him and had agreed to stay, at least for a little while. She did not appear to actively detest him. It was a start.
She stirred just as they were nearing the door to her room, her eyes flying open and darting around wildly when she didn’t recognize her surroundings. “Be at peace,” he said soothingly. “You fell asleep in the carriage. I’m only taking you to you room.” He felt her relax in his arms, and there was some small gratification in that.
“Thank you, Aidan. I’m sorry for being such a bother.”
He chuckled. “It’s not a bother. You’re rather charming when you’re asleep, and I can’t blame you for being tired. You aren’t exactly a heavy burden.”
Her cheeks flushed when he called her charming, which only made her more so. “Well, thank you anyway.”
“You’re quite welcome. Can you stand? We’re right in front of your chambers.”
“I think so,” she said, looking up at him. He’d never really looked her in the eyes before, perhaps out of a sense of self-preservation. They were a sparkling silvery blue, like the water of a mountain stream. Somewhat reluctantly, he set her on her feet. “I suppose I’ll see you tomorrow?” she asked in a voice that sounded somewhat hopeful.
“Of course,” he replied, feeling warmth bloom in his chest. “I’ll send a message to my father requesting an audience as soon as possible. Hopefully, he’ll be able to see us right away.” Once again, her face flushed, and he knew she was thinking about what lay ahead sometime in the nebulous future. He couldn’t help but smile.
“Well, good night then,” she said in a slightly tremulous voice. Without thinking, he took her hand, unwilling to part on such an awkward note. He didn’t particularly feel like parting at all, but neither did he wish to frighten her.
“Rowan, I was wondering if you would allow me to give you a kiss?” Her eyes went almost impossibly wide. He thought she would refuse; she had tensed like a rabbit ready to bolt. “Not if it makes you uncomfortable, of course,” he added as gently and evenly as he could manage.
But she looked at him, and whatever she saw seemed to reassure her or give her the confidence she had previously lacked. “I think a kiss would be perfectly acceptable,” she said with utmost dignity.
And so, he reached out with one hand to brush his fingers over her cheek before sliding them over to cradle the side of her face. He felt her draw in a sharp breath as he bent down to her, and her eyes fluttered closed. It was a gentle kiss, as gentle as he could make it, and all too brief, but he tried to pour all of his feelings into it, even the ones that he hardly understood himself.
He pulled away before he ended up doing something foolish. “Goodnight,” he said, stepping backward and releasing the hand he’d been holding.
“Goodnight,” she replied in a breathy voice, one of her hands waving as he turned to walk down the hall. It wasn’t until he got back to his own room that he really allowed himself to relax. Things were going well. As long as there were no further disasters, everything would be all right.
****************************
The next morning, Rowan sat out on the balcony with Fenella, enjoying her breakfast in the sunshine. They talked about court gossip for several minutes, but finally, the handmaiden put her cup down with an impatient clatter. “So, aren’t you even going to tell me how your romantic rendezvous with the prince went?”
Rowan would have liked to retort that it had been nothing at all like she was imagining, but considering all that had occurred, she could only bite her lip in embarrassment.
“Well, Serenalis really was spectacular, and Aidan was a wonderful escort. We spoke about a variety of subjects, and then…” she paused, feeling almost as embarrassed as when she’d said it the night before. Fenella waited with an expectant smile. “I told him that I wanted to stay here. I chose him to be the heir.”
“Oh, I know that,” the handmaiden replied, waving her hand dismissively. “The prince sent a messenger to his father this morning and has been checking and enhancing all the wards, so we figured something must be going on. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out what. But I mean, did anything happen between you personally, you know?”
The suggestive waggle on her eyebrows was somewhat disconcerting on Fenella’s childlike features, but Rowan was aware that her friend was not, even by fae standards, a child. Her appearance was just for show. She idly wondered what Fenella really looked like, and then wondered whether there even was such a thing as a ‘true form’ to the fae. Something to ask about later.
But she still had not answered the question, and she had a feeling Fenella wouldn’t let it go until she did. “He gave me a goodnight kiss,” she admitted with a sigh of defeat.
Fenella leaned forward, her eyes sparkling. “And was it a good kiss? Meaning, did you enjoy it?”
Rowan felt her cheeks growing hot. She had a feeling she was going to be doing a lot of that in the future. “It was…brief. But it was a nice kiss, I suppose. I don’t have much experience in that arena, but he was very gentle.”
“So, what do you think about it?” Fenella asked brightly. “Are you happy? Do you love him?”
“I…I mean, it’s a little early for that,” she stammered. “And furthermore, don’t you think that would be rather unwise of me? Aidan, however charming and handsome, is an immortal Prince of the fae, and I am just a normal human girl, no matter the particulars of our current entanglement.
Expecting anything more than friendship is only asking to have my heart broken.” There it was, the thing that had been bothering her the most these past several days, and especially after last night. She could feel herself becoming more and more attracted to Aidan, and it frightened her.
Fenella tilted her head thoughtfully. “You really can’t imagine that he might care for you as well?”
Rowan frowned. “How could he?” That was the crux of her argument, but she really could have made a whole dissertation on the subject of her obvious unsuitability as a romantic partner for Prince Aidan had there not been a knock at the door.
Fenella went to answer it, leaving Rowan sitting alone on the balcony, frowning to herself. She didn’t understand what her handmaiden was thinking. Aidan couldn’t possibly think of her as anything but an unwelcome intrusion, a momentary blip in his existence, could he?
“Good morning, Rowan,” said the voice she most and least wanted to hear at the moment. Aidan was standing in the doorway, and Fenella was nowhere to be seen. Rowan felt slightly miffed at the abandonment, especially since she was fairly sure it was only an attempt by her friend to advance her romantic fantasies.
“Good morning, Aidan,” she answered, doing her best to be pleasant despite her consternation. “Would you like some tea?”
He sat down at the table across from her with a small smile. “I’d love some,” he answered, “But, unfortunately, we can’t linger long. I’ve received word from my father.”
“Oh?’ Her attempt at nonchalance was somewhat marred by the fact that her hand was shaking so badly that she nearly dropped the teapot.
“He wants to see us this evening before dinner,” Aidan continued. She took a deep breath and somehow managed to pour the tea and pass him a cup without incident. Then, he met her gaze with his own. “I know this is short notice, but I promise you that everything is going to be all right.
Lord Kennet may be difficult and terrifying, but we are telling him something he wants to hear, and I’ll be right there with you the whole time.” He reached across the table and took her hand.
Her heart fluttered, and she was reminded of Fenella’s words from a moment ago. Could it be possible that Aidan was interested in her beyond the terms of the contract and becoming his father’s heir? “Thank you, Aidan,” she said, squeezing his fingers. “I’m sure it will be fine.”
*************************
Hours later, she was dressed in another elaborate getup, a dress of a purple so deep it was nearly black, with accents of ebony feathers. It was, she realized, just as much of a statement as the one they were planning to make with words. She belonged to Aidan now. She didn’t know how to feel about it, at least, not until she met him in the courtyard and saw his outfit.
They matched; his perfectly tailored jacket was subtly embroidered with feather designs, and the silk shirt underneath was the same color as her gown. Somehow, it made things feel more reciprocal, like he belonged to her just as much. He smiled gently as she approached. “Somehow, every time I see you, you’ve grown more beautiful. I might suspect magic at work, except I know that isn’t the case.”
Rowan had no idea how to respond to such a compliment. “I…Thank you. But, you know, Fenella picks out my outfits, so I’m sure it’s all her doing.”
“Fenella is certainly a worthy handmaiden, but that is only because she knows how to enhance the beauty that is already there,” he said, his eyes crinkling at the corners. “But I have something for you as well.”
He brought his hand from behind his back, and in it was a slender silver coronet set with onyx and moonstones, almost a twin to the one that he was wearing. She remembered it from the feast on her first night in the Otherworld. Without a word, he set it into her hair.
“How can I wear something like this? I mean, I’m not any sort of royalty,” she protested in confusion.
Aidan chuckled. “I believe you’ll find that the concept of who does and doesn’t qualify to wear a crown in the Otherworld is vague at best. But, in any case, you are my partner, and I wish that to be made clear to all those assembled.”
“Meaning Niall, I take it?” she said, trying not to show how affected she had been by his words. Because a partner was someone of equal standing, and to her it also felt like something more…congenial, if not more permanent, than the contract that had bound them by chance.
“Especially Niall,” he admitted with a touch of grimness. “But everyone else as well. Your father taught you to beware of our kind, and he is certainly correct. The Court is a nest of vipers, and the only way to escape them is to be too big for them to tackle.
I intend to make it clear from the beginning that I won’t stand for any harm to come to you.” As he spoke, he seemed to Rowan to be both cold and hot, burning with the passion of his declaration even through the icy calm of his intentions.
It reminded her of what Teague had told her about Aidan’s mother. She had been murdered for political reasons, and now he was determined that it not happen again. It still hurts him, she realized. He doesn’t want that for his own child. In that moment, the future that had felt so tenuous and insubstantial seemed to solidify, to become real.
This man, who was practically a stranger, but who was kind and passionate and generous despite the cruel things that had happened in his past, would be the father to the child she bore. It felt like she’d been struck in the heart, and she, for the first time, realized why they called it Cupid’s arrow.
She was still reeling from this realization when he held his hand out to her. “Are you ready to depart, my Lady?” Niall had said the same thing to her once, some weeks ago that felt like years. Back then, she had felt frightened and unsure about her fate, but now, though she felt anxious about her imminent arrival at court, she was not truly afraid.
“Yes, I am ready,” she said, placing her hand in his.
held her close as they passed through the gate, his arm wrapped tightly around her waist, and it seemed to make the trip through the maddening unreality of whatever magic allowed for this kind of travel easier to bear. Ethereal winds still roared in her ears, and light and color still exploded through her mind, but now she could hear something else, the sound of a steady heartbeat. It held her like an anchor, soothing her fear.
And then, it was over. Aidan didn’t let go of her immediately, supporting her as she recovered her balance. They were back in the same charming garden that Rowan had departed from with Niall, however long ago that had been.
No one seemed to be around, so she didn’t feel too embarrassed about her weakness, and when her legs finally stopped wobbling underneath her, Aidan removed his arm and took her hand instead.
“We may as well go and see him right away, if you’re prepared.” Rowan did not feel particularly prepared to see Lord Kennet again, but she was also aware that no amount of delay would make her more so.
“Yes, let’s go,” she agreed. Aidan nodded, and hand in hand, he led her through the garden and into the Palace of the Lord of the Heavens. As she had noticed the first time she was there, the corridors were a veritable maze. She would never have been able to find her own way, had she been forced to do so, but Aidan guided them unerringly.
Several times they were stopped by those who had questions or greetings for the Prince, but he always begged them off with the explanation that he had a pressing appointment with his father.
“Everyone’s curious about you,” he muttered with a wry grin. “They want to know what’s so special about what seems to be an average human girl and to ascertain whether you might prove to be an ally or an enemy.”
Rowan would have also liked to know what was so special about her, but it didn’t feel like the right moment for that sort of conversation. “You mean, this isn’t normal?” she asked, gesturing vaguely toward the most recent group of admirers.
“No,” he replied, the smile not leaving his face. “rumor has it that I routinely devour children for breakfast, after all, and I’m not overly fond of pleasantries.” Rowan laughed, but another part of her was thoughtful at this admission. When she had first met him, she had found Aidan cold and terse, but despite her fear of all things fae, she had never thought he was cruel or evil.
Clearly, there was something she was missing. She did not suspect he was lying to her, but rather that he was lying to everyone else for reasons that eluded her.
But there was no further time to consider it because they arrived at a massive pair of doors made of gold, silver, copper, and countless precious stones. It was difficult to tell what it was they were supposed to depict because it was done in such minute detail on a large surface, but she thought it might have been the creation of the universe or something similarly grand.
However, she did not have the luxury of examining them for very long. As soon as the guards saw Prince Aidan approaching, they stepped aside and the doors swung silently outward.
Aidan squeezed her hand as they entered the throne room, and a booming voice announced their presence. She appreciated the gesture. Though it was much as she’d expected it to be, soaring ceilings, polished marble, and rows upon rows of pillars marching up to the impossibly high dais, it was still overwhelming.
Their steps echoed as they approached, and Rowan noticed that the floor, which had previously appeared to be dark blue or purple marble, was actually some sort of living model of the night sky.
It was so realistic that she felt like she might fall into the Void at any minute, no matter that she could feel the ground under her feet. She gripped Aiden’s hand even more tightly, but he didn't react to this outward sign of anxiety.
The closer they got to the barely visible throne, the more courtiers stood along the walls, and their whispering voices seemed to swirl around Rowan and follow after her as she walked. She wondered what they were saying about her, and decided she probably didn't want to know.
Finally, they reached the dais. The nine steps up to the throne seemed rather inconvenient for communication, in Rowan’s opinion.
“You may approach,” Lord Kennet boomed from on high, and though she was shaking with nervousness, she made her way up the gilded stairs alongside Aidan. He stopped when they reached the step just below the throne. To Rowan's lasting horror, not only was Aidan's father there, wearing an expression like a cat who’d been into the cream, but Niall was as well.
The younger prince sat on his father’s left hand, on a throne that was only a little smaller than the central one. He did not look at her, but he appeared agitated, as if he was having difficulty remaining still. His eyes were cold.
“Lady Rowan,” Lord Kennet greeted her with a smile. “I understand you have something you'd like to tell us.”
“Yes,” she answered, doing the best she could to keep her voice from trembling. She glanced over at Aidan, and as he inclined his head in her direction, she felt a brief increase in pressure on her fingers. It was enough. “I've made my decision in regards to our contract, Lord Kennet.”
The Lord smiled, showing his teeth, but it was not a comforting expression. “So, you've chosen Aidan to be the one to sire your child?”
“I have,” she replied, and she felt a momentary surge of relief, like a weight had been lifted. But it was shattered by Niall’s enraged shout.
“No!” He jumped up from his seat, all trace of his usual joviality gone. “He cheated me, stole her right from under my nose.”
“I did no such thing,” Aidan retorted, his voice icy. “You lost her, and I found her. I offered to bring her back, and she refused. Perhaps you should endeavor to be a little less bloodthirsty.”
“That's rich, coming from you. I've heard what goes on in your city,” Niall replied
Aidan shrugged, neither confirming nor denying these rumors. “Perhaps you shouldn't believe everything you hear,” he said blandly. Rowan wanted to say something in his defence, but when she glanced at him, he gave a subtle shake of his head. “In any case, she's made her choice, and if you are half as honorable as you claim to be, you'll abide by it.”
“What would you know of honour?” Niall took a step forward, and she could feel the threat that emanated from him, like a wave of pressure washing over her. Aidan responded only by narrowing his eyes, his expression composed. It felt like an eternity passed while they stared at each other, but finally the oppressive tension eased.
“I won't stand for this,” he growled, and then he spun around and disappeared behind the thrones. It was only when his footsteps faded away that Rowan felt like she could relax.
“That went about as well as I expected,” Aidan muttered. Lord Kennet laughed so loudly it felt like the ground was shaking. Rowan was annoyed.
“I don't know why you find this so amusing. Don't you want your sons to get along?!”
Lord Kennet raised his eyebrows. “You have even more spirit than I gave you credit for, girl. As much as I might wish to have familial harmony, my children are too different to expect them to be friends, and frankly it's better this way. They can sort things out before they have to worry about running the whole Court. Bickering over your affections is better than civil war.”
“It may lead to civil war if Niall isn't kept in check,” Aidan remarked grimly. “He's been known to hold a grudge.”
“It's up to you to make sure it does not,” the Lord said in a tone that brooked no argument. “Think of it as a test of your leadership abilities and resolve.” Aidan nodded, his face set. Rowan privately doubted that such a test was needed. She’d been to Serenalis, after all.
Lord Kennet grinned again. “In that case, we ought to celebrate. I’ll have the servants order up a feast right away!”
“That won’t be necessary, Father,” Aidan said, frowning. “We’ll stay for the Solstice festivities, but there’s no reason to rub the loss in Niall’s face.”
“If that’s what you wish, I suppose I can wait to offer public congratulations. You do like to spoil my fun,” the lord grumbled. “I hope you’re happy with your choice, girl. Now you’re stuck with him.”
Rowan pursed her lips. “What, don’t you approve? You said both of your sons were equally qualified, after all.”
Lord Kennet laughed again. “I never said I was upset. Just giving you fair warning about the kind of thing you have to look forward to.” Aidan only sighed in response, and Rowan shook her head. She found Lord Kennet’s personality changes somewhat dizzying, and he was already looking serious again.
“Speaking of warnings, Lady Rowan, I’m sure my son has already told you some of it, but you need to keep on your toes. Now that you’ve picked a side, so to speak, the battle lines have been drawn. Aidan may be well-liked in his own domain, but things are different in the Court at large.”
“I will protect her,” Aidan said with sudden and surprising fierceness. Rowan turned to look at him, eyebrows raised. “I won’t let that happen again.” His grip on her hand was like a vise.
“I have no doubt of your intentions,” his father answered. “But forewarned is forearmed, so they say. Plus, I think Lady Rowan can handle herself if she knows what to watch out for. Now, run along. It’s nearly time for the evening meal, and I have other things to do today.”
Rowan felt profoundly lighter as they exited the throne room, and when she glanced at Aidan, she could see that some of the tension in his posture had eased. They didn’t walk back to the garden, but rather turned down the first corridor they came to and entered what looked like a small sitting room. He released her hand as he shut the door behind him, and she found that she missed it.
“I know that was difficult for you, but you did well. I think my father was impressed,” Aidan said in a quiet voice.
“I don’t know why that would be, but I’m glad you think so,” she said, following as he went to stand beside a window. It shouldn’t have surprised her to see that the view outside, rather than showing more sunlit gardens, showed a moonlit sky on the shore of an ocean that glowed with its own light, but she gasped all the same.
“You stood up to him. Even more so than you did at first. He enjoys a bit of verbal sparring,” Aidan said, smiling softly. “But you ought to sit down and rest. It’s been a difficult day, after all, and we still have to attend dinner.”
“You aren’t,” she pointed out with an arch of her eyebrow. “I daresay you’ve had more to do than I have.”
He laughed softly. “I’m not sure I will be able to relax until we return home, but for your sake, I suppose I can try. Come and sit.” They made their way to an ornate couch in the corner of the room, which proved to be much more comfortable than it looked. Rowan sighed as she sunk into the cushions.
Aidan sat next to her, but not too close, as if he was determined not to invade her space. Despite his stated intent, he did not look at all relaxed, but leaned his chin on his hand with a pensive expression. Feeling brave and also concerned, Rowan took his hand.
“Are you worried about Niall?” Without looking her direction, he pulled her close against his side, wrapping his arm around her waist. She was temporarily startled by this unprecedented display of affection, but she found that she did not dislike the sensation of being close to him, and she leaned her head on his shoulder. She felt, rather than heard, him let out a long, slow breath.
“Among other things,” he admitted. “I expected him to be angry, of course, because he always assumed he’d be the heir, but he seems to have taken it rather personally. I’m afraid that he might decide that he requires revenge on you more than me.”
“I’ll be careful. I trust you to keep me safe,” Rowan said because it was true. For one thing, he needed her to be safe for his own ambitions, but she also felt in her heart that he would protect her just because that was the kind of person he was. As the stress of the day fell away, she felt fatigue descend on her like a heavy blanket, and she yawned.
Aidan turned toward her slightly so that she leaned against his chest, and she could hear his heartbeat, the same one that had held her fast as they had passed through the gate earlier that day.
“I will protect you. I will do whatever it takes,” he said into her hair. She let out a soft sigh, and he brought his other arm around her carefully until he was embracing her fully. “Rowan,” he said in a low voice. “I…” A soft snore escaped her.
After a moment of shock, he smiled and pressed a gentle kiss to the top of her head. When Fenella came in a quarter of an hour later with refreshments, she found them both asleep.
Neither Aidan nor Fenella commented on the impromptu nap, thought Rowan’s handmaiden had smiled rather knowingly at her when she’d barely awakened in time for dinner. The truth was, in those first few moments, before she’d truly realized where she was, she had been…content.
Almost blissfully so. Aidan’s body was warm and solid, his arms encircling her both protection and comfort. One of his hands stroked her hair, but then he must have felt a shift in her. He stilled, not even breathing, and she felt a twinge of disappointment.
“Did you have a pleasant rest?” he asked, his voice a soft rumble against her cheek. She looked up at him, at the gentleness in his eyes, the soft smile that elevated his angular features to almost holy elegance, and despite her embarrassment, she couldn’t help but smile back.
“I did, thank you,” she said, her cheeks on fire. He released her from his arms, and she put a hand on his chest to push herself upright. They pulled apart slowly. His eyes never left hers.
Fenella made a small noise across the room, perhaps clearing her throat, and that was enough to break the spell. She turned to her handmaiden, who told them it was nearly time for dinner. Luckily, they had not disarranged themselves too terribly, and after smoothing down their clothing, she took Aidan’s arm, and off they went.