Chapter 17: The Betrayal

 

 

“THIS STUPIDEST thing we’ve ever done.”

I rolled my eyes. “So you’ve said, Tiggy. Repeatedly. For the last three hours. In those exact words. Over and over again.”

“Making sure you heard.”

“I heard you.”

“Still doing it?”

“Yes, Tiggy.”

“You’re stupid.”

“Hey!”

“He’s not wrong,” Gary said as we marched down the road, the flags atop Castle Lockes visibly flapping in the distance. “I mean, I’ve followed you through some pretty stupid stuff before.”

“You act like all we do is stupid stuff.”

“Do you remember that time you made wings out of parchment and sticks you found on the ground and were ready to jump off the back parapet before your mom found us and told you that if you moved another inch, you would be grounded for the rest of your natural life?”

“You were the one who told me to do it! And also, do you know how many times I’ve been grounded for the rest of my natural life? Seven times. No, wait. Eight times, because she did it again when I came back from my Dark Woods Dragon Adventure.”

“Or what about the time you chained yourself up in the middle of a field because you wanted me to come caress you with my mouth?” Kevin said. “We didn’t even know each other. That was pretty stupid. And also sexy.”

I scowled at him. “That was the truth-corn cult. I had nothing to do with that.”

“Or what about the time you took a visiting dignitary to one of the hole-in-the-wall bars in the slums so he could get the real City of Lockes experience?” Ryan asked.

“He had fun! Well, for the first few hours. The next seventeen days were hostage negotiations, but they were damn good negotiations. Those bandits ended up walking away with confused expressions and three hundred pounds of sea salt they never knew they wanted. And then they were arrested. Everything turned out fine!”

“This is stupidest thing we’ve done.”

“Tiggy!” I gasped. “Have you so little faith in me?”

Tiggy patted me on the head. “I believe in you.”

“Aww.”

“But you’re stupid.”

“Everything is going to be fine. As long as you all follow the extremely detailed points I laid out to the letter without any deviations, we shouldn’t die a horrible death after being tortured for weeks where our fingernails are pulled out one by one.”

“I don’t have fingernails,” Gary said. “So I should be just fine. I can handle a little torture.”

“You once screamed bloody murder when you got a splinter in your leg.”

“It hurt.”

“It turned out not to be a splinter at all but a piece of lint stuck in your hair.”

“I had to make sure you knew I needed help.”

“Whatever. Dimitri, you have faith in me, don’t you?”

The six-inch naked man with wings fluttered near my shoulders. “You broke up with me by running away.”

“For fuck’s sake,” I muttered. “Good help is so fucking hard to find these days.”

We were a motley crew, the six of us. A half-giant, a unicorn, a knight, a dragon, a fairy king, and a kickass wizard, all marching with our heads held high toward the City of Lockes with a firm belief in the plans set forth by said wizard, no matter how much bitching tried to provide evidence to the contrary.

I wore the best robes I could find on such short notice, a deep and flowing green inlaid with a gold design along the hem. Gary said it looked like a dress that I couldn’t even dream of pulling off, but he had done his mane up in a stylized bouffant for reasons even he couldn’t explain, so I didn’t think he had any room to talk.

Ryan was knighted out in full armor, something that he was probably regretting given how far we’d walked and how warm it was. But he refused to acknowledge his discomfort, because he was a man who did manly things. Like a douchebag.

Tiggy wore pants, even though he didn’t want to. We were all thankful.

Dimitri wore nothing. Because no one had tiny clothes.

“We’re going to be fine,” I said, more for everyone else than myself, given that I was absolutely forty-seven percent convinced that this was going to sort of work. “You’ll see. I mean, if you think about it, even if a few of my ideas have been less than stellar, we’re still alive for the moment, aren’t we?”

“Wow,” Ryan said. “Way to be inspiring.”

I scowled at him. “You’re sweating profusely because you’re wearing full armor like an asshole. Shut up.”

“We gonna die?” Tiggy asked Gary.

“Eh, probably. But you know what I always say. Die young, leave a good-looking corpse that people will probably want to have stuffed and positioned in a rather morbid art display inside one of those sterile-looking museums that people go to and pretend to understand exactly what the artist was trying to say because it makes them feel deep.”

“He does always say that,” Kevin said fondly. “I’m so happy we’re married again after having broken up, separated, soul-searched, had a trial reconciliation filled with a carnality that made even me blush, and then realized that Gary can do no better than the Beast from the East.”

Gary squinted up at him. “Dear, I think you got a couple of those words mixed up. Gary didn’t realize anything. You realized that your life was shallow and empty without me, and therefore begged me to give you the time of day again, and when I finally acquiesced, you cried and told me I am never allowed to leave you again because you were lonely without me and couldn’t imagine existing without me.”

“Ha ha,” Kevin chuckled awkwardly. “He’s so funny, right? Making stuff up like that.” He then lowered his voice as if he thought we couldn’t hear him, even though he was literally standing right next to us. “Would you stop saying that? We’re with our son and the boys. Don’t embarrass me in front of them. They won’t think I’m cool anymore, and then Sam won’t want to go out and toss the old pigskin around with me anymore and/or finally give in to the palpable chemistry that simmers between us.”

“It was a literal pigskin,” I told Ryan. “I don’t know where he got it from, but it was fresh. He tossed it at me, and I ran screaming because some of it got on me.”

“Did we ever figure out why he and Gary sometimes think they’re your parents?” Ryan asked. “Or is it one of those things we just accept as fact and don’t try to look too much into because it doesn’t quite make sense.”

“Like our lives,” Tiggy said.

“The half-giant is quite profound,” Dimitri said. “Maybe he could appreciate a man of my caliber. You there. Half-giant. How would you feel about being my queen?”

“I smash you,” Tiggy growled.

“Eep,” Dimitri said.

“This is totally going to work,” I decided.

 

 

AS WE approached, we could see movement atop the walkways on the walls that surrounded the City of Lockes. Given Kevin’s size, I was sure we’d been spotted long ago, but I wasn’t too worried about it. At least not yet.

Okay. Maybe I started to get a little worried when the gates opened and Dark wizards poured out, standing in a regimented line even before we could announce ourselves. I had complete and utter forty-seven percent faith in my plan, but there was still that small fifty-three percent that niggled at the back of my mind. Everything hinged on the next few moments, and I hoped that everyone was ready to play their roles to perfection.

I knew that we might have been a little bit fucked when Gary exclaimed in a loud voice, “Oh no! ’Tis the Dark wizards! Whatever shall we do? The fear is tingling down my thighs like I have restless leg syndrome!”

“Oh my gods,” I muttered. “Gary, shut up.”

“I’m just getting into character,” he hissed back. “You know I’m not good playing the damsel in distress. I’m much too tough for such frivolities. I am a strong, independent unicorn who don’t need no mens to rescue him, thank you very much.”

“Don’t need no mens,” Tiggy growled, his big hands curling into fists as he watched the Dark wizards ahead of us.

“We’re doomed,” I told Ryan. “Just so you know.”

“You always say that.”

“Yes, well. I mean it this time.”

“You there!” one of the Dark wizards cried. “Stop where you are!”

“Maybe I want to stop where I’m not,” Kevin said.

“Kevin!”

“What. You know I don’t like being told what to—oh. Right. The plan.” He winked down at me. “Daddy’s got you.”

“Is that what it would have taken?” Dimitri asked me stiffly. “Daddy play? Because I can do that. In case you can’t tell, I do have a mustache. There’s nothing more daddy than having a mustache.”

“Stop hitting on him or I’m going to punch you with my finger,” Ryan snapped at him.

“Hello there!” I called out to the Darks, desperately trying to retain control of the situation, because this was the stupidest idea I’d ever had. “Do you know who I am?”

The Darks looked at each other before they all shrugged. “Is your name John?”

I gaped at them.

“Not John, then,” another Dark said. “To be fair, he doesn’t really look like a John. More of a Terrance.”

“Terrance,” a third Dark scoffed. “You think everyone looks like a Terrance, only because your name is Terrance. Just because that’s a terrible wizard name doesn’t mean you need to foist your insecurities on the rest of us.” He scoffed. “Terrance.”

“Aw,” Terrance said, looking down and kicking at the dirt.

“I’ll be honest,” I said, “my ego took a little hit that they don’t know who I am. I mean, I know I shouldn’t let things like that affect me, but it really does.”

“You’re still wearing your hood,” Gary said. “They probably can’t see your face. Also, you egotistical whore.”

I pulled back my hood, revealing myself.

The Dark wizards gasped and took a step back.

“Aha!” I said. “That’s better. Though you would think the unicorn, half-giant, and dragon would have given me away.”

“What about me?” Ryan asked, brow furrowed.

“You’re a knight,” I told him, patting him on his metal shoulder. “You all look the same.”

“Ha,” Kevin said. “That’s so true.”

Ryan sighed.

“It’s Sam of Dragons!” one of the Darks cried. “Sound the alarm!”

“Wait!”

They all looked at me.

“Huh,” I said. “I didn’t think that would work. You’re legitimately waiting.”

“Focus,” Dimitri hissed at me.

“Oh. Right. Hello! Yes, hi. You are correct, it is I. Sam of Dragons. But I am not here for the reason you think.”

“You’re not here to try and destroy the Darks, rescue the people of the City of Lockes, and defeat Myrin as the prophecy foretold?” Terrance asked.

Godsdamn Terrance. “No,” I said as evenly as possible. “I’m not.”

“What?” Kevin said, overloud. “Why, whatever do you mean, Sam? I thought that’s the exact reason we came here. To destroy the Darks, rescue people, and defeat Myrin. You are the chosen one, after all.”

“Right,” I said. “I am the chosen one.”

Gary snickered next to me before I shot him a glare. He was able to semibelievably cover it up with a cough. “Yes, Sam,” he said. “As my husband said, whatever do you mean?”

“Yes,” I said. “See, I just said that in order to get you—”

“Traitor!” Kevin said.

I narrowed my eyes as I looked up at him. “You said your line too early.”

“Pot, meet kettle,” Gary muttered.

“Oh. Right. Sorry. I just got excited.”

“What’s going on?” one of the Darks asked.

“I have no idea,” another said.

“Like I was saying,” I continued, “I just said that in order to get all of you here, because you see, I have a surprise for all of you.”

“He has a surprise for all of us?” Terrance asked. “I do like surprises.”

Godsdamn Terrance. “Not for you. For my motley crew of travelers.”

“What surprise?” Tiggy asked right on cue, because unlike some of the people next to me, he understood the script.

I chuckled in what I hoped was a disconcertingly evil fashion. “Ah, my dear fellow, I am so glad you asked. Because you see, the truth is….”

All the Darks leaned forward.

“I have turned to the other side!” I shouted.

Silence.

Legit, like, a lot of silence.

“Kevin,” I muttered. “Anytime now.”

“Hmm? What are you—oh. Right!” He cleared his throat. “Traitor.”

“That’s exactly right,” I crowed, beginning to pace in front of my friends. “I, Sam of Dragons, have forsaken the teachings of my mentors and am now a Dark wizard.”

“Ooh,” the Dark wizards said.

“I knew that was going to happen,” Terrance said.

“You did not, Terrance,” one of the Darks snapped.

“I did,” Terrance insisted. “I told myself, Terrance, old boy, I bet you one day Sam of Dragons is going to show up here at the gates and then turn on his people.”

“Fucking Terrance,” another Dark muttered.

Gary pranced toward me. “But Sam,” he cried dramatically. His bouffant wobbled ridiculously on his head. “We’re friends. Best friends even. Maybe even more than that, because that line blurred a few times, especially when you drank too much and started eyeing my flanks like you wanted to lift my tail and stick your face up in there.”

Gary and his ad-libbing were going to be the death of us. “Yes,” I said. “That. Well, even you couldn’t sway me with your succulent wiles. I have turned Dark, and that is all there is to it.”

He looked gleeful when he was supposed to be emotionally destroyed. “My succulent what now? Ryan, did you hear that? He thinks I’m succulent.”

“I heard,” Ryan said through gritted teeth.

“And you,” I told Dimitri, trying to get us back on track. “I have betrayed you because I believe you to be a perfect offering to the greatest wizard in the world. After all, Myrin would love to have the king of the fairies as a prisoner.”

The Darks sounded rather pleased about that. “That’s so true,” one of them said.

Dimitri buzzed angrily. “You think you can stop me?” he asked. “I am the king of the Dark Woods. I am the Guardian of the Forest. The Keeper of the Trees. The—”

“We get it,” I said.

“Good,” he snapped. “Because nothing you can do can stop me.”

“You forget,” I said, arching an evil eyebrow at him. “I am the master of the dragons. They belong to me. They are in my control. Perhaps an exhibition of my power would show you just how wrong you are.”

“Do your worst,” Tiggy intoned. “I smash you good.”

“Ha, ha, ha! I would like to see you try, you giant of a man. Now, enough talking! Behold, the strength of Sam of Dragons!”

“I got chills with that,” Gary whispered to me. “Like, if this was real, I would consider being scared.”

“Cool, right?” I whispered back.

And then a bright light burst from my hand, a ball of swirling energy that was absolutely nothing at all. I’d used a smaller version in the sewer tunnels. It wasn’t even warm.

But the Darks didn’t know that.

“And now,” I said. “For one of my most diabolical spells. Flora Bora Slam!”

I hurled the light at Kevin. It hit him in the chest and dispersed. He wouldn’t have even felt a thing, but he clutched his chest and growled, his tongue lolling from his mouth. A little stream of smoke curled from his nostrils. He slumped over, head hanging down for a beat or two, before he raised his head and looked at me. “Master,” he said in a dull voice. “I am here to do your bidding.”

The Darks clapped.

“Wait,” Terrance said. “I thought dragons were impervious to magic.”

Godsdamn Terrance. He was my greatest enemy. After Lady Tina, Myrin, Ruv, Caleb, and Vadoma. I would have my revenge. “You are exactly right, Terrance. They are. Except for Flora Bora Slam. It is a spell of my own design, something I concocted while deep in the Dark Woods. I studied all the dragons and learned of a weakness in their makeup. That weakness allows me to control them.”

“In all ways,” Kevin said in that same flat voice. “Like, you could do things to me and I wouldn’t be able to resist. I’m your sexy puppet.”

“Right,” I said quickly. “Or other things not quite as gross and/or related to bestiality.”

“Control the dragons?” one of the Darks asked.

“Bwahaha! I am so glad you asked. Kevin! Take out Gary and Tiggy and Ryan and Dimitri!”

“Rawr,” Kevin said, bearing his teeth slightly. He reached down and tapped Tiggy on the shoulder.

Tiggy yelled, “GWAAAH!” as he fell to the ground, the dirt kicking up around him.

“Wow,” one of the Darks said. “It looked like he barely even hit him.”

“Grr,” Kevin said as he poked a claw against Gary’s neck, the skin dimpling.

“Alas!” Gary cried as he stumbled. “I have been defeated. My horn, recently returned to me that no one has complimented me on in the last thirty-six minutes, has failed me. I feel the darkness closing in on my vision. My life is flashing before my eyes. I had a wonderful time here in this world. Why, there’s the time I was a wee slip of a lad and found myself losing my virginity to a rough-and-tumble centaur named Douglas Von Snapperstein. He had such wonderful biceps that made me feel safe as he plundered my virgin hole. And then there’s the time I found myself eating warm ketchup for the first time and realized that people who open condiments and then put them back in the pantry instead of the icebox are essentially equivalent those who commit war crimes. And then there was the time I—”

“You said you were defeated,” I reminded him, starting to sweat a little.

“Well excuse me if I have lived a long and storied life that I have yet to write down in an autobiography entitled If I Did It, where I discuss all the bad and illegal things I’ve potentially done and tell you exactly how I would have done them had I done them. There would have been a surprise follow-up four months later called I Did It, where people would shell out the same amount to read the fact that I did those bad and illegal things.”

“Fall. Down.”

“Gods, you are a pushy little bitch, aren’t you? Is this a wizarding thing? Is that how you’re going to be now? Because if that’s the case—wow, you are evil, if that expression on your face is any indication.” He started choking before he fell to his knees and then over on his side. “Gahhhhh,” he said, tongue lolling out of his mouth.

“That was heartbreaking to watch,” one of the Darks said. “Because they were friends and all. Truly sad.” The other Darks murmured their agreement.

“I shall destroy you,” Ryan said, pulling out his sword and flourishing it in a practiced circle. The blade caught the sunlight, and I would have been really turned-on if he wasn’t such a douchebag and I wasn’t pretending to betray him. “And then I will bring back my one true love from the brink of darkness.”

“Kevin!” I bellowed. “Defeat the knight!”

“Your wish is my command, oh master of my gaping domain,” Kevin said.

Ryan charged at him, raising his sword. He brought it down gently (but not too gently) onto Kevin’s leg, where it glanced uselessly off the dragon’s scales. Kevin knocked Ryan’s sword out of his hand with a flick of his tail and then shoved him down to the ground a little harder than necessary. Ryan skidded in the dirt before coming to a stop near my feet.

I looked down at him.

He rolled his eyes.

I loved him so fucking much.

“As you can see,” I exclaimed, my acting probably as good if not better than those who graced the Lockes Stage, “three have been defeated. All that remains is the king of the fairies. And since it is his job to protect the dragons, he cannot fight Kevin. Therefore, everyone here has been defeated, and I have completed my betrayal.”

“He’s right,” Dimitri said, wings drooping. “I have been defeated and cannot do a single thing.”

The Darks clapped again.

Except Terrance. Terrance, who had already passed Vadoma on my list of enemies, looked down at my friends on the ground before saying, “But you haven’t monologued yet.”

The Darks stopped clapping.

“Excuse me?” I asked Terrance as politely as I could, even though in my head I was deciding how to remove his femurs from his body in the way that would cause the most pain.

“You say you’re a Dark wizard now.”

“Right.”

“And you’ve betrayed all your friends.”

“This is true.”

“But you haven’t monologued yet about your feelings and how you turned bad because of your father not loving you, or because you found dead animals in the woods when you were a kid and poked them with sticks.”

I stared at him. “I don’t—”

“Monologue,” Gary hissed as he squinted up at me before he laid his tongue back on the ground.

“But—”

“I believe in you,” Tiggy said.

“Aw,” I said. “Thanks, dude. But there’s no way in hell I’m going to—” The Darks were frowning at me, looking perturbed. “Oh, godsdammit. Do I have to?”

“Only a true Dark wizard would monologue after having his enemies defeated at his feet,” Terrance said. “Everyone knows this.”

The other Darks nodded.

“Ugh. Fine. I’ll do it. I’m not happy about it, but I’ll do it.”

They waited.

“Okay, so, like. Um. Let’s see. Monologue. Monologue. I mean, do I just start or…? Like, lay out my plans of evil and then…? Okay. I can do that.” I cleared my throat. “So. Here goes. I will now tell you my plan for crushing the Resistance.”

Gary was shaking on the ground. Motherfucker was laughing at me. I thought about lighting his bouffant on fire, but since he had his horn back, I figured he would probably shoot more rainbows all over my face, and I couldn’t have that. So I chose to ignore him instead.

“It all started when I was young and realized my father thought I was weak. He hailed from the North and worked in the lumber mills and was stronger than I could ever be.”

“Ohh,” one of the Darks said. “It’s already off to a good start.”

“Yes, my father thought I was too small and incapable of manly things and also a waste of space. All I wanted to do was impress him, but nothing I did ever worked.” Which, of course, was bullshit. He was very easily impressed. “I begged him. I said, ‘Papa, why can’t you love me as I am?’ And he said, ‘You’re too meek and mild for me to love. I wish we had had a son who mattered.’”

Two of the Darks’ lips were wobbling.

I was so good at this.

“And then I grew up and became magic and was told I was going to be a good guy, but then I thought p’shaw, that sounds boring and predictable. Why on earth would I want to do that? So then when I heard there was a prophecy about me, I decided to defy the gods. I pretended to go along with them, but secretly I was learning how to be a Dark wizard, because everyone knows Dark wizards are cooler than most others and very hard to fool.”

“Damn right!” a Dark called out. “We’re so cool! And no one gets anything by us!”

“Exactly! So while it seemed like I was a good guy, I was actually the worst guy of all! Like, this one time Gary asked if the magenta in his mane made him look fat, and I said no. But in reality, it did.”

Rainbow and glitter shot out of his horn and landed on my boot.

“Next one goes in your mouth,” he whispered at me.

I gulped. “And uh, so yeah! Like, I wanted to tell you guys that I was bad, but every time I saw a Dark wizard, there were a bunch of people around me and I couldn’t break my cover.”

“What about the time you saw Myrin in Mashallaha?” Terrance asked.

“Thank you, Terrance,” I said as evenly as I could. “I was hoping you were going to ask that. I had been seduced by love. You see, I have a cornerstone. He loved me, and I tolerated him, but he used that love against me, and I felt myself getting pulled toward the light. Why, that time in Mashallaha when I fought Myrin, Ryan had just told me how much he loved me, and how I was the best thing in his world, and how he didn’t think he could ever go on without me, and that if I left him, he would probably just lay down and die.”

“Laying it on a little thick,” Ryan muttered.

“Gross,” a Dark said. “Cornerstones are so clingy.”

“Right? But I was already drowning in his love, and so that’s why I fought Myrin. But I felt super bad about it afterward, and I’ll totes apologize the next time I see him.”

Terrance nodded. “Okay. You may continue your monologue.”

I winced. “I have to do more?”

“You still haven’t said your evil plans.”

“Oh, right. Riiiiight. My plans.”

“Your evil plans.”

“Gods, fucking Terrance—I mean, yes, Terrance. You are correct. My evil plans. You see, I went to the woods to learn control over all the other dragons. I hoped by the time I came back to serve Myrin that he would have destroyed the Resistance. But he hadn’t. So I infiltrated their camp, learned their ways and gained their trust, and now know everything about the Resistance.”

“I just got chills,” the first Dark said. “Did anyone else get chills? Because I did.”

“Right?” I said, pleased. “So, now if you could take me and my prisoners to Myrin, everything will be swell and we can get on with the whole destroying Camp HaveHeart thing. Also, that name sucks because HaveHeart is gross. Also, I hate love. And puppies. And feeling good. Because I like Dark stuff. Like… um. What do you guys like?”

“Potatoes,” one Dark said.

“Pushing people into lakes,” another Dark said.

“Lighting things on fire.”

“Looting and pillaging!”

“Punching orphans!”

“General mayhem!”

“Yes,” I said, nodding furiously. “I like all of those things too. Like, so much. Good. That’s the end of my monologue. I’m glad we’re all on the same page.”

“Except—” Terrance said.

“Shut up, Terrance,” I snapped at him.

The other Darks laughed. “Yeah, Terrance,” one said. “Shut up. He likes potatoes and general mayhem. He’s obviously a Dark wizard. Ooh, Myrin’s going to be so pleased. I can’t wait to see the look on his face when we bring his sworn enemy into the castle, only for him to realize that said enemy is now a Dark wizard and will help us crush the Resistance.”

They all started laughing evilly.

I laughed evilly along with them, because that was what one did when one was pretending to be a Dark wizard.

I so had this.

 

 

UNDER MY instruction, Kevin had gathered Ryan, Tiggy, and Gary in his arms, Dimitri following dutifully behind him as we were led into the City of Lockes. Dark wizards inside the City gaped at us until the call went out that the great Sam of Dragons had turned into a villain and was here to bring about the end of everything good and happy and filled with sunshine. The Darks cheered. The prisoners stared at me with wide eyes filled with shock and betrayal. I ignored them, making sure my robes billowed evilly around me. I waved at the Dark wizards, accepting congratulations on my decision to explore the fine art of villainy. My hand was shaken, my back slapped, and I smiled as evilly as I could to make sure no one saw through my ruse.

The farther we walked into the City, the more Darks poured out of the buildings and alleyways until the streets were filled with them trailing along behind us. Sure, some remained at the gates and on the parapets, but the majority were following.

As we wound our way through the City toward Castle Lockes, Kevin kept his gaze straight ahead, Tiggy, Gary, and Ryan lax in his arms. Dimitri fluttered behind him, head bowed. The fact that this had worked as well as it had was a little shocking but not unforeseen. I was obviously one of the world’s greatest actors, just now coming into my talent.

Castle Lockes loomed before us as we approached, Myrin’s flags fluttering in the breeze. I could see Darks gathering ahead at the entrance to the castle and wondered if Myrin already knew of my arrival. I’d done nothing to shield my magic since we’d stood outside the City. If he was as powerful as I thought and as connected to me as the gods claimed, then I thought he would have known I was here.

So I was a little disappointed when we reached the entrance to Castle Lockes only to be greeted by… Caleb.

“What is this?” he asked, eyes wide. He looked up at Kevin and who he carried before glancing back at me. “What is he doing here?”

“He’s turned into a villain!” one of the Darks exclaimed. “He monologued and everything.”

“It was really quite impressive,” another Dark said. “It wasn’t even a monologue from a beginner. Quite advanced, if you ask me. Pretty much a natural.”

What a mean thing to say. “Bwahahaha,” I laughed, trying to prove to Caleb that I was, in fact, a villain as the Darks were claiming.

Caleb’s eyes narrowed. “Sam of Dragons has… turned?”

“Well, that’s what it looks like,” Terrance said, because he never knew when to keep his fucking mouth closed.

“Shut up, Terrance,” Caleb snapped.

“Aw,” Terrance said, looking down at the cobblestone.

“I’m totes evil now, dude,” I told Caleb. “You can trust me on that.”

“Totes evil,” he repeated slowly. “And how did this come to pass?”

I shrugged. “You can only spend so much time in the Dark Woods getting magic shoved into you by dragons before your mind starts to… expand.” I glanced up at Kevin to see Gary staring down at me, a strange look on his face. “You begin to see things in a different light. I’m no longer the person I once was.”

Caleb stared at me for a long moment. Then, “You expect me to believe that.”

“Yes,” I said.

“You, Sam of Dragons, are now a villain.”

“Pretty much.”

“You have to know how ridiculous that sounds.”

I cocked my head at him. “Why is it so hard to believe? I was poor, growing up in the slums while the top one percent ruled over this land and gave us nothing. And when I was finally taken from the slums, it was because of a lie told to me by people I trusted and I was met with derision from all sides. And that’s something that never changed. No matter what I did, the people of Verania have hated me. They unified and marched against me. Demanded my removal as the apprentice to the King’s Wizard. And then my mentor died in front of me. I left those I cared for behind while I went to gain power from questionable means. If that’s not the backstory of a villain, I don’t know what is.”

“Right,” Caleb said slowly. “But why here? Why now?”

I grinned maniacally. He took a step back. “Because I’ve seen what I’m truly capable of. How far my magic reaches. Why, I could very well wipe you out with a single thought, but instead I’m letting you live.”

Caleb swallowed thickly. “What happened to them?” he asked, nodding up at the precious cargo in Kevin’s arms.

“Sam asserted his control over the dragon and forced him to take them out in front of us,” a Dark said. “I’ve never seen such a thing. I mean, it’s about time that insufferable unicorn finally got knocked out. I’m so anti-Gary, I don’t even know what to do with myself.”

Anti-Gary, I mouthed to no one in particular, because the phrase just didn’t compute. Gary was one of the greatest creatures ever to have existed. Everyone loved him. And now that he had his horn back, there was just more to love. Sure, he could be overbearing and mean and snarky and bitchy, and he really didn’t understand personal boundaries or common courtesy or that funerals were not an appropriate time to hit on a hot newly widowed lumberjack, but the fact that anyone could not like him was simply mind-boggling.

And when the Darks started murmuring their assent behind us, it was all I could do not to actually smite them where they stood. Gary was awesome and cool, and I really liked it when he sang songs about killing people he didn’t like.

“You have control over the dragon?” Caleb asked, sounding incredulous.

I squinted at him. “What part of Sam of Dragons do you not understand?”

“Does that include the Great White?”

“He’s a dragon, isn’t he?”

“What is the meaning of this?” another voice called as it entered the courtyard where we’d gathered. I didn’t even need to look. I would recognize that voice anywhere.

Ruv.

He came to stand next to Caleb. He didn’t look surprised to see me, even if his outburst suggested otherwise. He appeared rather smug, which led me to suspect Myrin did sense my presence just as I’d expected. In fact, I thought it was possible that Myrin was somewhere in the crowd, listening to every word. Many of the Darks had hoods pulled up over their heads, obscuring their faces. Myrin was probably going to let Caleb and Ruv vet me before he revealed himself in a dramatic fashion that was supposed to strike fear and awe in the hearts of all those present. I reminded myself to show fear and awe when the time came.

“It appears Sam here has had a change of heart,” Caleb said, sounding nervous. “He’s claiming to be a villain now. Says he has control over the dragons.”

I could see the moment when Ruv registered who Kevin held. His eyes widened slightly, but that was all. He hid it well. He hadn’t been expecting them. “A villain,” Ruv said slowly.

I shrugged. “It happens, I guess. But hey, maybe I don’t want to have to repeat myself over and over again. So why doesn’t Myrin join us so I can just say this once?” I sneered at Ruv. “Besides, I don’t think I’d answer to someone like you. I mean, you’re cute and all, what with your dirty street magic, but I think it’s time for the adults to talk, don’t you?”

He didn’t like that very much. “I am his second,” Ruv hissed, taking a step toward me. “And as for my dirty street magic, it certainly got the best of you, didn’t it? Myrin gave it to me, and I made sure to use it against you as best I knew how. My sail board, for example. You thought it a gift from the heart, when instead it allowed me to track your every move until it was unfortunately destroyed.”

Whoa. That escalated quickly. And for the briefest of moments, my control wavered and a great and terrible rage rose within me, and it felt black and dark, that someone like him could be so cavalier about—

I took a breath. And pushed it away.

“Is that what you think?” I asked him coolly.

“It’s what I know.” He took another step toward me. “I stood in that house and felt your anger when you realized just how completely I’d betrayed you. How well you’d been played. I wallowed in your anguish when I shoved your cornerstone’s sword into his chest. I was right under your nose the whole time, and you never saw me coming. So don’t speak to me as if I’m not worthy of your attention. Because I have taken more from you than almost anyone here, and I will have your respect.”

He was right, of course. Not about respecting him, because fuck that. But no, I hadn’t seen his betrayal until it was too late. He had me there. But I couldn’t let that distract me. Not when—

There. In the crowd. Off to the right.

“Myrin,” I said, raising my voice. A hush fell over the Darks. “Perhaps you could pull your guard dog back so we may have a civilized discussion.”

No one moved.

I turned and looked directly at the hooded Dark who emanated that sick yellow infection tinged with something so much more, something that felt akin to home, but twisted in savage mockery of what it had once been. He had his own magic, yes, but he also had Morgan’s, and it reached for me, sticky and sweet, whispering for me to love it, to touch it, to meld with it like we’d done time and time again.

I reached up and pressed my hand against Ruv’s chest, pushing until he took a step back. His eyes narrowed, but I ignored him. “Myrin,” I said again. “If you please.”

He reached up and pulled his hood back and—

It wasn’t Myrin. It didn’t even look like him. It was some random man, some Dark who smiled nervously and—

“You are a curious creature, Sam of Dragons.”

I jerked my head to the left. Myrin stood just out of reach, his long red robes flowing around him. There came that discordant feeling again, a sense of blurred edges, of one image placed atop another, because Myrin looked so much like Morgan. The same beard and build. The same face. But it was the eyes that caused the dissonance, the eyes that felt just a step off. Morgan’s had always been warm and kind, tinged with exasperation and mirth. Myrin’s were cold and calculating, unnerving, as he didn’t seem to blink.

And here, at last, was the beginning of the end of my story.