Chapter 9
Carlos didn’t understand what was happening. Why was Amy asking him to kiss her? What was going through her head? But it didn’t matter. Because it was one invitation he couldn’t resist.
Carlos set his beer beside hers on the table and enveloped her cheek in his palm. His hand slipped behind her head, weaving itself into that silken hair. He tugged—gently, slowly—bringing her lips within inches of his.
He paused there for just a moment, examining her eyes. They were bright, clear, and sure. It was all the reassurance he needed. He covered her mouth with his own. He started off soft and sweet, then he ran his tongue gently along her lips. She opened to him, her head falling back and relaxing into his hand.
He deepened the kiss, tangling his tongue with hers. She followed his lead. When she moaned, soft and sweet, into his mouth, he moved them both back, finding their way toward the arm of the couch, headed for a more intimate position.
Amy pulled back. She placed a hand on his shoulder and pushed. Carlos let her go but left his hand lingering on the back of her neck. He pressed his forehead against hers. “I’m sorry.”
“Oh, don’t be,” she said. “I only stopped because I think I need to tell you this before we go any further.”
“Okay,” Carlos pulled himself away from her, settling back into the couch and retrieving his beer. He had to force himself to calm down. Kissing Amy had left him practically vibrating.
Amy took a long pull of her beer, set it down again and twisted her hands together in her lap. She sat straight and rigid. “I don’t remember anything about the kidnapping. But, apparently, the reason Cassandra took me was because Rodney was turned on by little girls.”
Carlos couldn’t breathe. He literally had to use all of his brainpower to keep his body still, his face expressionless, and his lungs filled with air.
“She never let him touch me. At least that’s what she said in court. But they would have me stand next to the bed while they…well, you know.”
Carlos stayed silent, but he put his hand out between them and held it open. Amy stared at it for just a moment before slipping her palm into his and intertwining their fingers.
“So I’ve been to a million therapists and stuff, and the thing is, I don’t have any memories or any kind of conscious trauma over it all. Like I said, my family members were far more affected than me. But there is one thing. And while the shrinks all thought it was tied to the kidnapping, I’m not so sure.”
He nodded and squeezed her hand, willing her to continue.
“So, all my life, I never…I never had any…desires.” She let out a deep breath. “I thought of myself as Asexual, I guess. Even after puberty there was…nothing. I wasn’t interested in anyone of either gender in a sexual way.” She ran a hand through her hair. “I’m not explaining this well.”
“You’re doing fine,” he encouraged.
“I’ve never had a crush. I’ve never flirted, or kissed, or necked. I’ve never wanted anyone, and I’ve never had anyone.”
She looked up at him through her lashes. The shy girl was back and her cheeks burned with a beautiful pink blush. It was painful for Carlos. Even as she was making him want her more she was telling him she didn’t, couldn’t want him back.
“And then I met you.”
Carlos felt his breath hitch and he was back to concentrating on how to breathe again.
“And from that first day I saw you at lunch two and half years ago, I had a thing for you. Hell, I didn’t even recognize what it was back then. But it stayed there, you know?”
He nodded. He’d noticed her from the beginning, too.
“And then when we started working together it got more…intense. I started to think things I’d never thought before. And I noticed other men, too. I mean, I didn’t want any of them like I wanted you. But I started to see them. For the first time in my life I could appreciate the male form.”
She was blushing again. In a case of absolutely horrible timing Carlos was getting hard. He tried to sink further into the cushions of the couch.
“Anyway, I even…God. I’m actually gonna say this out loud,” she said to herself. She raised her eyes and looked at him. “I even masturbated thinking about you.”
That was it. He was hard as rock. There was no going back until he had a cold shower.
Amy ran a hand over her face. “This is all so embarrassing.”
He squeezed her hand, put down his beer and leaned toward her. “Don’t be embarrassed.” With his free hand, Carlos palmed her jaw and stroked her chin with his thumb. “I love your honesty. And I love that you’re sharing this with me.”
Amy took a deep breath. “You changed my whole life, Carlos. I never thought this would happen. When I saw my future I saw me adopting kids or getting artificial insemination. I imagined myself alone, a virgin, without ever knowing what…this…was like.” She shivered under his hand. “This is so amazing,” she whispered, leaning closer to him.
He wanted to explore that, but first he had a pressing question. “Why me?”
“I don’t know. But it’s definitely all about you.”
“Maybe it was just your time or something.”
“No, Carlos. You did this to me. And I am hoping that you want me, too. See, I can’t really tell if you feel the same way because I’ve never—”
Carlos stopped her with a kiss. It was deep and passionate, and he poured his desires into it. Just in case she hadn’t gotten the message, he pulled back and whispered, “I want you, Amy.”
She smiled. “And you don’t mind that I’m…completely inexperienced.”
He pulled back a little to examine her face. He did mind, only because he wanted to make everything right for her and he wasn’t sure he could. He didn’t want her to get the wrong idea, so he tried to explain it. “Of course I don’t mind. It’s just that…I’ve always been with experienced women. Right from the start. So I don’t know if I can take care of you like you need.”
“I don’t need to be taken care of.” The fierceness he’d seen in her before made an abrupt appearance.
“Maybe not. But, I think we should take this slowly.”
She raised an eyebrow.
“I mean, I want to go slow.”
She looked skeptical.
“Let me back up. Are you asking me what I think you’re asking me?”
“Yes,” she said. “I am asking you to help me find that part of myself that was missing for so long. I am asking.”
“And I accept,” he said, his heart racing as he made the agreement that could so deeply alter the course of his life. “But I want to set the terms.”
“That makes sense, I suppose. Just don’t treat me like a porcelain doll.”
“I won’t,” he promised before taking her into another deep kiss. When he pulled away they were both breathless. “But we’re going one step at a time. Actually, one base at a time.” He grinned at her. “Are you familiar with the bases.”
Her eyes were glazed over and the struggle to clear her mind was written on her face. “Um…in the sexual sense? Yeah. I’m familiar with the concept.”
“Tell me,” he said, using the same tone he used when he’d been mentoring her at work.
“First base is kissing. Second base is, um, touching. Third base is…” There was that blush again. “Oral…And a home run is, well, a home run.”
“Right. So we’ll start at first base and only first base.”
She pouted. “I was hoping to move kinda quickly toward the bases that involve…”
“Yes?”
“Orgasms,” she blurted out.
“Oh, sweetheart. They all involve that.”
Her eyes grew wide. Before he could talk himself into stepping up to bat, he stood. “I should take you home.”
She stood as well. “What? Wait! What about first base?”
He bit back the laugh that threatened. She looked so devastated. It was adorable. “We’re going to practice that some more later, sweetheart. For now we need to part ways.”
“I don’t want to,” she said, almost whining.
He chuckled and leaned forward, gently nipping at her lower lip. “Me neither. But, still…”
Amy’s apartment was mercifully close to Carlos’ condo and it took less than ten minutes to drive her there. This time he walked with her into the building, up three flights of stairs and to her door.
They chatted with Marcel briefly then gave him a major shock as Carlos kissed Amy goodbye. The kiss was short, sweet, but not chaste.
“Tomorrow?” Carlos asked.
She nodded. “Pick me up tomorrow for dinner.”
“Okay.”
“Maybe you could cook for me at your condo?”
“Okay.” He knew what she was thinking. He could eat safely that way, and they could make out to their hearts’ content afterward. “See you then.”