Chapter 9
Justina raced out of the room. But Adam had reached the stairs already. She knew she would never catch him; he was too fast. She sighed. Was she being too strict? He had never said he hated her before. The words had stunned and hurt her. She was furious with him for running, and disobeying her, but that couldn’t override the feeling of anguish at his words. She sighed. Maybe just this one last time. Maybe she should let him go; there was nothing she could do about it now.
She returned to her room and sat on the edge of the bed for a long time. This entire thing had quickly gotten out of control. She never should have come back. She rubbed her eyes in frustration and weariness. She debated what to do. She could wait here for Adam’s return. Or she could… What? Do what? A strange need arose inside of her. An overwhelming need to see Gawyn, to let him comfort her. Just seeing him would allow her to reasonably go over her options; she knew just talking to him would make her feel better.
Slowly, she made her way out of the castle into the inner ward. She spotted Gawyn almost immediately standing beside her brown and white horse. For a moment, her entire body longed to be in the warmth and protection of his embrace. But she knew that was impossible. Still, she made her way to him.
“Where’s Adam?” he asked.
Justina inhaled. “He really wanted to go with Lady Aurora on the picnic.”
Gawyn stared at her for a long moment. “You allowed him to?”
She shook her head.
He drew himself up as understanding washed over him. “I’ll bring him back.”
Justina grabbed his arm. “No. No, let him go.”
“Are you sure?”
Justina nodded. Of their own accord, her fingers moved through his. She wasn’t certain if it was because she was hurt, or because she was confused, but it felt good when Gawyn squeezed her hand.
“You said no. He should listen to you.”
“I know,” Justina whispered. “But I’m not his mother.”
Gawyn sighed softly. “But you look out for his welfare. He knows that.”
Justina looked away toward the gates of the castle. She did her best, but sometimes it wasn’t enough.
“Would you like to see more of the castle? I could show you the art gallery.”
“What’s that?”
“Lady Aurora’s father collected some of the most remarkable art. It’s stored in a long hallway.”
Justina shook her head. “Just walk with me.”
He nodded and signaled to the stable boy. “Keep the mare prepared. They will be leaving when the party returns from the picnic.”
The stable boy nodded his dark head and held the reins of the mare.
Gawyn looked at Justina. “Are you hungry?”
After the way she had acted toward him, he was still looking out for her. “I’m sorry for the way I’ve treated you,” Justina admitted.
He guided her over to the side of the wall beside the blacksmith shop. A wooden bench was situated beneath one large tree. “I’m sorry for not being truthful.”
Justina sat. It wasn’t his fault. This entire mess. He was being truthful. It was time for her to do the same. “How well do you know Lord Damien?”
Gawyn hesitated. He had never been embarrassed of telling people Damien was his brother, but for some reason, his instincts told him not to tell Justina. “Very well.”
Justina lifted her gaze to him. There was such sadness in her large brown eyes that he wanted to gather her to him and comfort her, but he didn’t move.
Tears entered her eyes. “Did you know?”
“Know what?”
“What he was before he was Lord of Acquitaine.”
Dread washed over Gawyn. He straightened and looked away from her. “Justina, I never intended --”
“Did you know?”
Gawyn hesitated. He could lie to her, but that would end badly. He sighed. “I know everything about Damien. He is my brother.”
Her eyes widened in shock.
Gawyn grabbed her hands. “You have to understand –”
She pulled away from him. “Did you know what he was? Did you know he was a killer?”
Gawyn bowed his head, his eyebrows coming together in agony. “Yes,” he whispered. “But that was another lifetime ago.”
She grabbed his tunic, desperately. “Did you know he killed my father?”
Gawyn startled, pulling back slightly. His gaze swept her anguished face. Slowly, understanding dawned. That was how she knew Damien. She had recognized him as the assassin of her father. “No. I didn’t know every person he killed.”
She pushed against his chest and stood. “But you knew he killed. You knew what he was, what he did.”
Gawyn rose slowly, dangerously. “I knew. And it would be best for you to forget.”
Justina gasped and her eyes teared. “Are you going to kill me if I don’t?”
“Justina.” Gawyn reached for her, but she pulled away violently. He stood for a moment with his hands outstretched before slowly lowering them. His heart twisted that she could even think he would harm her. “No.” Gawyn watched the sadness creep over her, invade her body. He wanted to take her into his arms and comfort her, reassure her it had been a long time ago. That he and Damien were different men and they would never harm her. But she knew the men they had been. And he couldn’t change his past. “Please, listen to me –”
“No, you listen! I saw him. I saw him standing over my father with a bloody dagger. He took my father from me! He must pay. He has to…” Her voice choked off and she whirled away.
Gawyn remembered the blood from some of his own kills. He knew the death. He would have sheltered her from all of it, if he could. Still, the need to defend Damien was strong. “He’s a good man now, Justina.”
“A good man?” She turned back to him, her eyes ringed with unshed tears. “Is that why he sent you to kill me?”
Gawyn shook his head. “He didn’t. I wasn’t sent to kill you. I would never do that. We are different now.” He looked away from her, understanding why she had to leave. It was better for her to be away from them.
“We?” she asked, shocked.
Gawyn realized his mistake too late. They could never be together. He was a fool to even think, to even hope… “I was an assassin, also.”
Justina’s mouth dropped open in shock. Her eyes twisted in contempt and her lips curled in disgust.
Gawyn had never seen the look. From Justina, it was like a sword plunged into his heart. “You wanted honesty.” He reached his hands out in supplication. “I haven’t done that since…since we arrived here.” He shook his head fiercely. “I wouldn’t…”
She pulled away from him as if his touch would burn her.
Slowly, Gawyn withdrew his hands. “I wanted you to know the truth. It’s not just Damien.”
Suddenly, a horse came charging into the inner ward. People scattered to get out of the way of the sharp hooves. Gawyn reacted instinctively and moved quickly into the path of the steed. He held his hands out above his head to stop it. It reared, and he had to step to the side before the hooves crashed down on his head. He seized the flapping reins, bringing the horse under control. It was spooked, or tired. He couldn’t tell which.
The man on the horse was Sir Lewis, one of the soldiers who had rode with him to escort the Hungars to the borders. His hand clutched his side, his face a mask of agony. Gawyn handed the reins to the stable boy just as the soldier crumpled and slid from the saddle. Gawyn caught him before he hit the ground and eased him down. He lifted the soldier’s hand from his side to see blood pooling across his tunic. Gawyn looked around for help. One of the sentries was coming toward him. He pointed at him, ordering, “Get a physician.”
The sentry whirled and raced away into the growing crowd.
Sir Lewis grabbed Gawyn’s tunic, pulling him close. “The Hungars...” his voice trailed off as a coughing fit sprayed droplets of blood across Gawyn’s tunic. “Rode around. Killed all the men. Burned the farm...”
Gawyn grimaced. He glanced at Justina to see the color drain from her face. Her uncle. He shouldn’t have left them. “Where’s Rupert?”
The soldier shook his head.
“How many?”
“Twenty-five. Fifty,” he said. “An army. They caught us off guard. We...”
“Take it easy, Lewis. Rest. Help will be here soon.”
“All of them, dead.”
“Rest. Don’t talk,” Gawyn ordered.
Blood bubbled from Lewis’s lips. “They’re coming. They’re...” His hand went limp and slid from Gawyn’s tunic. His eyes glassed over, and he stared, lifeless.
Gawyn straightened. The Hungars were coming. The castle was in jeopardy. He reached out to Lewis and closed his eyes before rising to his feet. There was work to be done. His mind churned. Damien needed to know. The people needed to be protected and the gates closed.
He looked toward Justina. The spot she had stood in was empty. He glanced around, at the bench they had sat on. It was empty. His gaze moved over the courtyard, stopping briefly at the blacksmith shop and the door to the keep. She was gone. He scanned the inner ward for her and caught a glimpse of her wild brown hair as she raced beneath the inner ward gate toward the outer ward. “Justina!” he called, but she didn’t stop. He hurried after her, skirting guards, and peasants. He had to stop her. She couldn’t leave the castle. It wasn’t safe!
By the time he reached the gate, she was gone, swallowed up in a crowd of merchants and commoners. He stared into the outer ward, but there was no sign of her. He couldn’t find her amidst the mass of people filling the outer ward. He cursed quietly.
One of the farms near the border had been burned, but he wasn’t sure which one. It might be her uncle’s farm. Justina wouldn’t go there. He knew Justina was going to find Adam. Adam had gone with Aurora.
Aurora! He glanced back at the castle. He slammed a fist into the wall. He desperately wanted to pursue Justina and make sure she was safe. But he had responsibilities to the castle, the people of Acquitaine and his brother.
Gawyn hurried back to the inner ward. He glanced back at Lewis, satisfied to see the physician had arrived and was kneeling over him. He rushed to the sentry who had raced to get the physician. “Have the guards doubled. Raise the red flag and bring the villagers inside the walls.”
The sentry nodded and hurried away.
Gawyn spun, looking over the sea of people again as if he would magically find Justina. But she wasn’t there. She was gone, and he had a job to perform, responsibilities, duties to see to. The safety of the village and its people had to take precedence over one girl. He knew this, but it didn’t help the crushing weight of guilt and worry that consumed him.
He had to find Damien. Gawyn raced into the keep. He ran through the hallways, dodging servants and merchants. He glanced in the Great Hall quickly, but Damien was not there. He took the spiral staircase two at a time and burst into the hallway. He ran past two nobles huddled in murmured talking to knock on Damien’s solar door.
After a long moment, he pounded again. Finally, the door opened.
Aurora’s lady’s maid, Anna, greeted him with a slight bow.
“Where’s Damien?” Gawyn demanded.
Anna pulled back slightly from his harsh tone. “I don’t know. Perhaps the Great Hall?”
Gawyn didn’t wait for anymore guesses. “If you see him, it is important I speak with him.”
She curtseyed.
A tight knot formed in Gawyn’s stomach. He wanted to go after Justina. He had to make sure she was safe. Yet, he had a dedication to his brother and to Acquitaine. Gawyn charged down the spiral stairway. It was the only time he wished the castle wasn’t so big. As he reached the first floor and ran passed the Great Hall again, he saw a servant and grabbed his arm. “Where is Lord Damien?”
“I saw him heading toward the war room.”
Gawyn spun and ran in that direction. He was wasting time looking for his brother. At least he had gotten word out to double the guard and bring the villagers inside. But it wasn’t enough. It was hardly enough. An army. The Hungars had an army.
Finally, he spotted his brother entering the war room. It was so called because that was where they gathered to discuss matters of safety with the other constables at the castle. Gawyn should have known he would be there. If he wasn’t so tired he would have known. It was the third day of the week and that was always what they did.
Gawyn rushed into the room to see all the constables and lieutenants already seated around a table. Gawyn knew them all. Damien was just taking his seat as he approached him.
“It’s the Hungars,” Gawyn announced. “They’ve attacked Acquitaine.”