I must be losing my mind, letting Hayden Vale into my head and body like that. And heart, too? Could I ever let him into my heart? This was wrong on so many levels, but I couldn’t change the way he’d taken over my thoughts, and the way my body reacted every time he was near.

I was sticky and sweaty from the sex, and though my hands were still cuffed, I needed to take a shower. It would be awkward, but it needed doing. I figured the metal could get wet. At least Hayden had torn off the t-shirt. I couldn’t help the smile that touched my lips. I had the feeling he’d probably enjoyed doing that.

He had the boat back now, so we’d be moving off the island soon.

The idea filled me with a combination of anticipation and dread. I hoped to get away long before ever coming face to face with my father, but the possibility of seeing him again made me panicky and lightheaded. I was terrified of what my reaction would be, and I knew the main thing I was fearing was that I’d feel something that resembled how I’d felt about him when I’d been a child. I’d loved him so much growing up. He’d been the fun, easygoing one, always tickling me to make me laugh, or sneaking me treats after Mom had said no. I knew it was all an act, of course. He’d been very good at hiding what he really was—a coldblooded killer. It was part of what made him good at what he did—his ability to make people love him—and that didn’t stop when it came to his family. We were part of his guise; I saw that now. People saw him as a safe, reliable family man, who kissed his wife often in public, and who was happy getting on the ground to play with his children. And we’d played along, his willing victims.

My anticipation came from the possibility of freedom and also knowing I’d be spending time with Hayden. The cuffs still around my wrists told me I shouldn’t be wanting to, and reminded me that he was my captor, not my friend, but I couldn’t deny that there was something alluring about him.

I went into the bathroom and stepped beneath the shower. Quickly, I realized there was no possibility of washing properly without getting the handcuffs wet. I guessed it didn’t matter. The cuffs would dry quickly enough, and they seemed expensive, so I doubted they’d rust. I hoped I wouldn’t be wearing them long enough to find out. The handcuffs were my own fault, anyway. If I had never tried to escape, I wouldn’t be wearing them.

The thought jarred me. I shouldn’t be thinking like that. Being kidnapped wasn’t my fault. Wearing handcuffs wasn’t my fault either. I’d struggled for so many years believing I’d been to blame for what had happened with my father, and just when I finally thought I’d beaten the guilt—or at least was making an effort to beat it—Hayden Vale came into my life.

The metal cuffs were soaked now, so I ignored them as I soaped my body and hair then rinsed myself down. My body felt pleasantly used as I ran my hands over my ass and between my thighs. I shouldn’t like what he was doing to me, but I couldn’t help it. I also understood why Hayden had done what he had by taking me, and maybe it was that understanding that allowed me to forgive him, at least in part. I didn’t think I’d ever forgive him for snatching me in the way he had, but yes, I did understand why he did it.

Clean and refreshed, I shut off the water and climbed out. It was awkward trying to get the towel around my body when I had my hands cuffed together, but I used my teeth to hold one part while I pulled the other part around me. It dawned on me that I wasn’t going to be able to get a t-shirt over my head either. At least I could get it over my head and shoulders, but any farther down and it would bind my arms to my body. Shit.

With the towel hooked awkwardly around me, I went to the drawers in the bedroom. I remembered stepping out of the shower after I’d first been brought here and how I’d entered the room to find Hayden standing there. A part of me wished I’d find him here now, but I was alone.

Pulling open the drawers, I rifled through the contents. Most items were t-shirts and tank tops, and I wouldn’t even be able to get a bra on in my current situation. After my escape attempt, I didn’t think begging Hayden to undo the cuffs long enough to allow me to get dressed was going to work. He’d think I was using it as an excuse to take my chance and make a run for it again. But I didn’t want to sit with only a towel half wrapped around me until he made another appearance. I also didn’t want to only be in a towel if it happened to be Loretta who came down to me next. The older woman set my teeth on edge, and being half naked around her made me feel even more vulnerable.

I slammed that drawer shut and tried the one below. I closed my fingers around something soft and silky and pulled it out. It was a dress that at first I thought was strapless, but then I saw it had thin halter straps that tied around the neck. It wasn’t ideal, but I’d be able to step into the dress and pull it up.

I located a clean pair of panties, though I’d still have to go without the bra, and then I pulled on the dress, covering my bare breasts. It was awkward trying to tie the halter-straps with the metal jangling around, but I managed.

Pleased with myself, I smoothed down the skirt. I felt halfway respectable. Was this what I’d end up wearing on the boat with Hayden? A little thrill surged inside me, and I pushed it back down. We weren’t going on vacation.

Now I was clean and dressed, I was once again at a loss as to what to do next. I’d lost track of time and was unsure if it was nighttime outside. The lights still hadn’t been lowered in the room, but since I’d spent the previous twelve hours or so in total darkness, I guessed I couldn’t rely on that anymore.

Remembering the sandwich Loretta had brought down, hunger suddenly rose up inside of me. It seemed I had my appetite back now that I knew Hayden was safe. The sandwich was the first thing I’d eaten that day, and I assumed it was nighttime now. I wolfed it down in only a few bites, barely tasting the contents, and then chugged the bottle of water.

With my stomach full, I toweled my hair dry and raked my fingers through the strands to work out any knots. Then, with that same sense of boredom and frustration suddenly weighing me down, I climbed onto the bed and curled up on my side. I’d close my eyes for a little while and get some rest, so I’d be ready for whatever came next.

***

I WAS BACK IN THE HOME I’d grown up in, though I was an adult again.

I walked through the hallways, feeling as though I wasn’t supposed to be here, but I was unsure why. This was my home, wasn’t it? Why would I not be allowed to be here?

Everything looked exactly the same as when I’d been a child. Family photographs were hung on the walls, a vase containing flowers that were now dead and needed replacing sat on the sideboard.

“Hello?” I called out. “Mom? Dad?”

Something jarred in my head. Why was I calling for them? Mom was dead, wasn’t she? And Dad had been jailed. Yet I felt as though they were here, and my heart lifted in hope. Maybe I’d gotten it all wrong. Perhaps the whole thing had been nothing but a terrible dream—a dream where I’d become an adult and my whole world had blown apart. My heart swelled with emotion. Was it possible? Could I go back to a time when none of it had happened and just start again?

But somehow, I knew I couldn’t change anything. My father was still going to be the same man, no matter what I did.

Movement came from the room next to me, and I turned my head.

My brother’s room.

“Reece?” I called out his name.

For some reason, it felt like I hadn’t seen him in a long time, but I couldn’t remember why.

The door opened, and there he stood, my little brother, rubbing his eyes, his honey-brown hair too long and falling over his forehead. He wore Marvel comic pajamas and looked far younger than his nine years.

“Reece!” I cried, throwing my arms around him and hugging him tight. I seemed so much bigger than he was, though I wasn’t quite sure why.

He frowned and pushed me away. “What are you doing?”

My stomach dropped. “Nothing. I’m just pleased to see you.”

“You’re not supposed to be here.”

His comment took me back. “What?”

“You’re dead, remember? That guy killed you.”

Tears filled my eyes, and confusion swept through me. Was that the truth? Was I really dead?

“Jolie?”

A male voice, deep and gravelly, came from behind me.

I turned slowly to see Hayden standing at the other end of the corridor. He put his hand out toward me.

“That’s enough now, Jolie. It’s time to go home.”

I shook my head. “This is my home.”

“Not anymore, it isn’t. Your home is with me now.”

Deep down, I knew he was telling me the truth, but my heart longed to go back, to a time before all of this horror happened. I looked to Reece again, standing in his pajamas. I didn’t know what I thought a nine-year-old boy could do to help me, not against someone like Hayden Vale, but still I wanted him to do something.

“Please, Reece. You’re my brother. Tell him this is where I live.”

But Reece only shrugged. “I’m not your brother anymore,” he said. “Sorry.” And he lifted his hand to his face, his fingers digging into the skin of his hairline. I stared in horror and revulsion as he pulled the skin down, revealing something beneath.

I’d been expecting to see blood and muscle and bone, but instead a second face stared out at me.

“Hello, Jolie,” my father said. “I’ve missed you so much...”