Chapter Twenty-Five

Stefanie

“Tired?” he asked. I looked up at him and smiled, or what I hoped look like a smile.

“Kind of.”

After slipping out of bed from the hotel room, I’d done a short shift at the coffee shop, met with a counselor at the local extension of the school I’d be going to, and then rushed to the bar, where I’d worked until closing time. Garrett had showed up about two hours into my shift. I’d been sure he would be pissy about not waking him up before I had left.

Instead, I’d had the pleasure of watching him swagger into the place like he owned it and sit his gorgeous ass on an empty barstool right in front of where I stood ogling. Because there was no other way to watch a man like Garrett without ogling. Ogling was a must.

With a smirk that told me he knew I’d been checking him out, he set a bag of takeout on the countertop and announced it was dinner time. The rest of the night passed in a flash, and before I knew it, he was walking me out to my car in the darkened parking lot, kissing me goodbye, and asking to text him when I got home.

No request of going back to his place or of coming to mine.

And I’d been disappointed.

Not that I didn’t need the rest, I did, but sleeping without the big guy next to me was hard.

Then my car had decided not to start. Again. I’d had the battery changed three weeks ago, but I wasn’t going to think about it. Not about the cost or that it probably meant I would have to start looking for a car soon. If I did, I’d get less sleep than I was already going to have, and I couldn’t do it.

I glanced up at Garrett and took a quiet moment to examine him.

“Sleep,” he urged, and just then a wave of sleepiness hit, and I yawned so big my eyes watered, but I shook my head. He was taking me to the small apartment over Kip’s garage because my car didn’t start.

“We’ll be at my place before you know it, and I’ll have to wake up.”

“Trust me?” he asked at the red light, his eyes focused on mine. I nodded.

“I do.”

“Then rest. Don’t stress.”

“Garrett, when I’m this tired, waking me up can be… challenging.” That was putting it mildly. He’d probably laugh if he saw the eight alarms I had set in my phone lately with the sole purpose to wake up.

“I got you. Rest,” he urged again, so I shrugged and settled deeper into the comfortable seat of his truck.

Fine, if he wanted to get stuck figuring out how to wake me up, that was on him.

I closed my eyes and sleep took over.

_______________

“Sunshine,” a deep voice whispered into my right ear. My head moved toward it, and I felt his soft chuckle before it hit the air. “Baby, wake up.”

“Mmm,” I breathed in deeply, my lips hitching up as the clean scent of pine hit my nose. “New car freshener?” I asked with my eyes still shut.

“Baby, open those eyes for me.”

“Fine,” I grumbled as I blinked once and then twice trying to get my bearings. “This isn’t home.”

“Well.” He grinned in front of me, and I peeked behind him.

“Garrett, we’re in Big Bear.”

“We are.” He stood up and extended his hand out toward me. “Come on.”

“Garrett,” I sighed, my head starting to hurt. “This is kidnapping,” I stated, and he laughed. Laughed! “Look, it’s really sweet of you to bring me up here, but I have to work tomorrow.”

“Take the day off,” he said. I hopped out of the car, and now it was my turn to get in a good chuckle as I shook my head.

“I can’t just take the day off!” I put my hands on my hips. “A real person, in real life, can’t take the day off, because they have things like bills.” I was being horrible, but between being exhausted and thinking of the long drive back home it was too much.

“I have bills.”

“Which ones? Your phone? That’s about it, right? Because I’m almost sure you walked into the dealership and paid cash for the truck, right? And this place.” I pointed at the cabin behind me. “I doubt you took out a loan for this place.” I watched his jaw clench as he crossed his arms on his chest.

“What does it matter?”

“It matters because we are so different. Don’t you see? We’re so different!”

“Stef, you need to calm—”

“I mean, honestly, no wonder we push and pull. I don’t know about relationships. I don’t have a clue about what a healthy one is supposed to look like or be. And you,” I groaned and pointed at him. “Geez, your background is like a Norman Rockwell painting.”

“I wouldn’t go that far.”

“How far do you think we can actually go—”

“The distance,” he said, taking me into his arms with one hand, the other hand bringing my chin up, so we could look at one another. “You and I are going to go the distance, Stef.”

“The distance? This isn’t some underdog guy sports movie. This isn’t Cool Runnings, man.”

“Why is it with you, I find myself torn between laughing and wanting to kiss the crap out of you?” he said, and I stood still.

“What?” I asked, suddenly more awake than tired as I looked at him and really took him in. There I had been shouting off stupid things about our stupid differences, and instead of seeming angry, he was wearing a goofy grin on his face. “Why are you smiling?”

“You’re cute when you’re exhausted.” He brushed a hair away from my face, tucking it behind my ear. “You put a lot out there, and we will get to it, but it’ll wait till tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow? Garrett, I can’t. I have to work. We gotta get back. I need to figure out my car—”

“Kip wants you to take the day off,” he gently announced, and I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath before answering him.

“That’s great, but I still have a shift in the morning at the coffee shop and—”

“And Kip talked to your bosses,” Garrett informed me. I raised a brow at him.

“He what?”

“We,” he pronounced, “were worried about you. You’ve been working non-stop, and Kip felt you needed a day off to relax. Catch up on sleep.”

“Garrett, I could sleep for the next week, and I wouldn’t be able to play catch up, not to mention, I need the money and—”

“No. You don’t.” He sighed, letting go of me as he scrubbed his face. I missed his touch instantly.

I noticed things I had avoided taking in when I was around him. The dark circles under his own eyes were hard to brush off under the moonlight, and I felt like a selfish cow. It was obvious he’d had a tough go of it, too, and I had been too busy to try and notice.

“Wait, Kip talked to you about taking me away?” I asked.

“I didn’t say that. I spoke to Kip, and he agreed with me that you needed some time off, so he helped me free your work schedule. You have tomorrow and Thursday, you don’t have to go into the other two, just the bar that night.”

“Thursday is Karaoke night.”

“I know that.”

“Will you be lurking around then, too?” I asked, and he laughed, grabbing my hand as he led the way to the cabin and let us in. Silently walking through the place, I couldn’t help but feel more relaxed with every step we took. There was something magical about this place.

“Nowhere I’d rather be,” he answered honestly over his shoulder as he opened the door to the master bedroom, and much like the first time we’d come there, the room took my breath away. But it had nothing to do with the furnishings, even though they were lovely.

“You’re sweeter than me, too,” I blurted. Lines formed on his forehead.

“Come here, baby,” he ordered in a tone that left nothing else but to comply.

I walked toward him, and he pulled me between his legs from where he was sitting on the edge of the bed.

“We are different. Some differences are obvious. You’re a woman, and I’m a man.” He smirked. “I think we both enjoy those differences, yeah?”

“Garrett.” I sighed. He was making fun of my concerns, and it wasn’t fair.

“I know. Just…” He placed a finger on my lips, then dropped it as he continued to talk. “The ways we grew up, as you’ve brought up, were different. Night and day. We both have dealt with disappointment differently.”

“What do you mean?”

“When life didn’t go my way, I behaved like a petulant child. You, on the other hand…” His hand stroked my face. “Jesus, Stef, you just shined brighter and worked harder.” His voice rasped with admiration. I swallowed hard.

“You’re giving me too much credit.”

“You don’t give yourself enough.” His free hand moved to hold my hand. “I’m in this thing between us, for the long run.” God, I wanted to believe him, but I was terrified. He was in it now, but what about next time something happened? The next nightmare?

“I’ll still be here. I won’t run.” Crap, I’d said it out loud. “I know trust is earned, and I know it’s harder to earn back when it’s been broken. But I’m gonna work to get it back.”

“How?” I asked because I wanted to believe him. I wanted everything with him.

“One day at a time.” His answer was confident. “Moment by moment. I’m going to prove to you that I’m not going anywhere. You own me, Stef.”

“What?” I whispered and leaned my face into his touch as he stroked my face.

“Everything I have is yours. No two ways about it.”

“Wait, what?”

“That includes my money,”

“I don’t—”

“My home, wherever that might be, but most importantly, my family.”

“Garrett.” I looked at him with wide eyes trying to process everything he was saying.

“You didn’t have a formal one growing up, yet you made one.”

“What?”

“Sunshine, you might not get it, but Kip and that Bash guy, they were people who could count on you, yeah?”

“Of course.”

“And in return, they would be there for you in a heartbeat.”

“It’s not the same.”

“You’re right. It isn’t.” His eyes softened. “But every family’s different. Now, yours has grown further because my people are yours. So, start painting yourself into the, what’d you call it? Norman Rockwell picture?”

“You can’t just say that and expect them to feel that way.”

“Very true. But it’s how they feel.”

“What do you mean?”

“It means, the girls were kinda bummed you cancelled on them for girls’ night. I had to take Val two pints of this ice cream she’s obsessed with.”

“Oh.”

“And let’s not start on Nicola.”

“She doesn’t even like me. Not really,” I muttered.

“She came to see me to ream me a new one for running away.”

“Really?” A butterfly started to fly in the pit of my stomach. “Is that why you stayed? Your family?”

“I’ve left my family before, sunshine.”

“To go to the military and make your dreams come true,” I pointed out. The opportunity he let pass him by would have given him that back.

“This time, I stayed because I thought I was chasing some kind of purpose, when in reality, I’d had it in front of me the entire time.” Whoosh. One butterfly turned into a swarm, and they were all flying around, making my heart race. “You give my life purpose. Together. What we share and what we might create after time…” He shrugged. My nose stung as he turned slightly blurry.

“Let me in. This time, it’s for keeps. Nothing will scare me away. Nothing will get between us. I promise,” he pleaded, and I had no choice. I nodded. Then he pulled a jewelry box from the nightstand beside us, and I stilled.

Holy crap. That wasn’t what I thought it could possibly be, right? He looked at me and smiled. “It’s not that.”

“Oh, thank God, because I don’t think I could handle that. Not that I don’t think we could make it work, or I don’t want us to go down that road. It’s just—”

“One day at a time.” He winked and chuckled, bringing me in and holding me close. I wrapped my arms around his neck and hugged him back.

“Exactly,” I whispered into his neck and could feel his against my neck.

“I get it,” his voice rumbled in my ear. “I can be a patient man.” I pulled away with dramatically wide eyes,

“You can?” His chest shook, his smile reaching new heights on his face. I loved the way he looked right then and there.

“For you, I’d be anything,” he said. I bit my lip.

“I love you so much,” I admitted, a tear rolling down my face.

“Hey, no tears.” He wiped the wetness away while I shook my head and sniffled. “So, what’s in the box?”

“You forgot something.” He pulled the box between us, and I opened it, seeing the necklace I’d thought was lost.

“Oh, my God!” I shrieked, taking the piece of jewelry from the box. “I thought it was gone,” I shared, and my face broke, the tears streaming down my face now.

“Baby, these tears are going to kill me.”

“I’m sorry,” I hiccupped. “I thought it was gone! I thought I’d lost it. I went back to the hotel the next day, but they said no one had turned in anything, and housekeeping hadn’t found anything.” I wiped my face. “When I let it hit that it was really gone, it felt like I’d lost you all over again.”

“Never again,” he vowed before wiping away more tears and leaning in to kiss my cheeks. “Turn around.” I did, lifting my hair up and feeling him clasp it around me. “Better?” he asked, and I looked over my shoulder.

“Tons.” I smiled through the tears.

“We good?” he asked as I sat on his right thigh, his hand around my waist as I rested my head on his shoulder.

“Better than good,” I whispered, letting myself melt into his arms as he pulled us into bed and we kicked off our shoes.

We didn’t take our clothes off; we just cuddled into one another and let the good emotions settle in as we let everything else go and sleep claimed us.

_______________

I rolled over and smiled.

Sunshine streamed in, filling the room with bright natural light and a warmth unlike I had known seeped deep into the marrow of my bones. I was alone in bed, but I’d known I would be.

Garrett had woken me up with his lips on my neck and his fingers between my legs as he coaxed me into telling him I belonged to him. Not to be outdone, I’d slithered down the bed and kneeled between his strong, manly thighs and had teased him mercilessly with my mouth until his own release. Breathless and winded, we kissed and watched the sunrise in silence before he turned and kissed my forehead, urging me to nap, telling me he was going to town to get us something to eat.

A bright yellow notebook with a neon green Post-it lay on the pillow next to me. I sat up.

These are for you.

I sat up and traced the cover of the notebook with a sunburst on the front before opening it.

Where the tears from the night before had been cleansing, the ones I shed as I read the love between the pages were comforting.

He’d written me a letter every day and night. The dates were visible at the beginning of each one along with the times. The love he had for me shined through with every sentence he shared.

Whatever past hurts I’d felt, not just his pushing me away, but those I had suffered at other people’s hands, started to fade as I read each of his words. Each one delicate and more beautiful and meaningful than the last. I took my time with them. There were short ones, long ones, funny ones as well as others filled with anger and rage about the things he’d seen and done overseas. Things he hadn’t had control of.

Each letter gave me a window into his soul, making me understand things about him in a way I knew no one else ever could. There was intimacy in his letters, and by the time I reached the last one, I was whole.

As I sat there, thinking about his words and the strength and courage it took to share himself in such a way that shattered him open, exposing every nook and cranny, I knew.

There was no looking back.

No doubting or questioning.

He was mine, and I was his.

Garrett

The house was quiet when he opened the door, but he had expected that. She’d been exhausted, and even though he’d probably been running on the same amount of sleep as she had, he had an overwhelming need to provide for his girl. Provide for my girl. He chuckled to himself at the primitive thoughts running through his mind, trying not to think too much about her waking up to his notebook of letters.

He’d written down everything.

From what he’d done on a daily basis to things he’d thought about but hadn’t known how to say out loud.

He walked into the kitchen and stopped in his tracks. She was sitting on the kitchen counter, a coffee mug in her hand, the familiar notebook at one side, and another mug at the other.

“You’re up.” He swallowed walking in, moving toward her as he took in the sight of her in his black tee shirt. He settled right between her legs, his hands resting on the outside of her thighs.

“I am.” She smiled, nuzzling her nose against his. “Morning,” she breathed against his lips. He felt his heart tighten with emotion. It had to be a good sign if she was wearing his shirt and smiling at him, right?

“Did you…” His Adam’s apple bobbed before he tapped the cover of the notebook beside them. “Read?”

“I did.”

“And?”

“And I think you’re amazing and brave, and I love you so much it’s stupid.” She grinned, and he pulled back so he could see her better.

“I’m so fucking sorry—” His voice rasped, but his words died the second she shook her head.

“We’re past that. Right? Moving on, one day at time,” she said, repeating his words from the night before. His hands moved to the back of her head, tilting it just slightly.

Sitting in the kitchen counter put her at the perfect height for him. Though he doubted there would ever be a bad height. As long as she stood by him, he would always make it work and figure out how to kiss her.

“Tell me you’re mine,” he cajoled.

“You already know that,” she softly answered, and his mouth moved to the slender line of her neck.

“Tell me.“

“I’m yours,” she said, and his hands touched her face. She looked like an angel sitting there. “I thought it was Cupid?” she teased. He realized he’d been waxing poetic out loud but wasn’t embarrassed or ashamed.

“Either way, you’re a temptation.” He pulled his head back, licking her with just the wet tip of his tongue.

“I wanna take you slow.” He blew air against her exposed skin. “I wanna take my time.”

“I think I could work with that,” she joked. Her breath hitched as his mouth closed to take a nip at her neck before moving away from her erratic pulse point to her jaw to meet her lips.

“Tell me I’m not dreaming,” he ordered, holding her face in his hands.

“You’re not dreaming.”

“You read it all?” he asked, fear tingling at the back of his neck.

“Every single word. Garrett…” Her eyes searched his. “I can’t imagine everything you’ve been through.” Dear old Doc had suggested he tell her things about his experiences in the military he had wanted to share with her.

He had started with random little things he slipped in here and there, like the places the Army had afforded him to see, slowly moving into heavier things, all the way to what he saw in his nightmares.

“We both did.” He stroked her cheek. She’d been a kid who life had tossed aside and hadn’t experienced the kindness and affection she had deserved, and he told her as much.

“I’m going to love you every single day of the rest of my life so hard, it’ll make up for that bad hand you were dealt.” He kissed her cheek, and she swallowed, her eyes getting suspiciously glassy.

She opened and closed her mouth. He expected her to argue, but she didn’t.

Instead, her hands traveled up his waist, her nails grazing over his cotton-covered pecs, her nails rasping against his nipples. A low groan escaped from deep within. His sexy sunshine had a sultry vixen lying beneath all her light, and damn, if it didn’t make his cock come alive.

“How about you start now, soldier?” she coaxed, her tongue peeking out and licking his lower lip.

“Yes, ma’am,” he eagerly agreed and worked on lifting her up, her legs wrapping around his waist, then he quickly took her back to their room, where he took his time loving her.