Somehow, Austin managed to sleep in his own house without getting up and standing on the back deck, his eyes trained on Shay’s front door like a creeper. He managed to get Christmas presents for the ranch hands, his brothers, Robin and Hazel, his mother and her boyfriend, his father, and everyone at Grape Seed Ranch.

And somehow, miraculously, he also got Shane and Dylan to agree to invite their father for Christmas. Shane’s stipulation was that their dad had to sleep at Austin’s, and Dylan’s condition was that their mother had to give her consent too.

Austin called her on Tuesday evening while he sat in the truck, the Christmas presents he’d spent the afternoon buying filling the cab beside him. “Hey, Ma,” he said when she answered. Her voice made everything in his life softer. “So I’ve got somethin’ to ask you, and it’s okay for you to say no.”

Dylan had told Austin he had to allow their mom to say no. Not be mad about it. Honor it.

“All right,” she said. “Go on then.”

“It’s about Dad,” Austin started. “I know you’re comin’ for Christmas with Barry, and that’s still all good and fine. I’m not sure if you heard about Dad and Joanna, but she left, and well, I thought it would be nice if he had somewhere to go for Christmas where he wouldn’t be alone.”

He pressed his eyes closed, a steady prayer streaming through his mind. “And he’d stay with me,” Austin added. “So you and Barry would be with Shane and Robin. Dad would be with me, and I don’t live in the homestead anymore.”

His mother still didn’t say anything, and Austin’s hopes deflated. “It’s okay to say no,” he reminded her.

“I’m not going to say no,” she finally said. “I made my peace with your dad a long time ago, and no one should be alone on Christmas.”

“Yeah?” Austin asked.

“Of course.” She sounded perfectly pleasant, but Austin hoped he hadn’t caused her any stress.

“Thanks, Mom.”

“You’re a good boy, Austin. You’ve always had the softest heart.”

Austin suddenly felt shaky, and he didn’t know what to say. He felt like he didn’t have a heart at all, that maybe he’d given it to Shay and was waiting for her to bring it back.

“We got a Christmas tree put up last night,” he said. “And the whole ranch is lit up. You’re gonna love it.”

“I’m sure I will.”

“See you soon, then.”

“Thursday.”

Austin hung up, his emotions ping-ponging around inside him, bouncing off each other and combining into dangerous concoctions. He didn’t know what to do with them, so he picked up his phone and did something he knew how to do.

He called his dad and invited him to the Christmas festivities on the ranch.

“And you invited Shay, right?” Austin stood next to Shane in the kitchen of the homestead, pouring a cup of coffee while his brother scrambled eggs. A lot of eggs. Robin’s mother had arrived last night, and Barry and Mom had arrived on Thursday night. Hazel was coming out for breakfast before the Sunday Christmas service, and even Dad said he’d come over for something to eat.

“I invited all the ranch hands,” Shane said evenly, just like he had the other five times Austin had asked. “She has not specifically confirmed she’ll be comin’. She’s welcome, as I told her, whether she RSVPs or not.” He nodded toward the saltshaker. “Give that a spin around the pan.”

Austin did as his brother instructed, wishing he knew for certain if he was going to see Shay that day or not. It was Christmas Eve. She shouldn’t be alone, and her father had confirmed his attendance at the gift exchange later that evening, as well as Christmas Dinner the following day. What would Shay do—where would she go—if she didn’t join them?

He couldn’t stand the thought of her being by herself, or even going to someone else’s house. He wanted her here, beside him, as they opened gifts and sang carols and read the story of the Savior’s birth from the Bible.

There were only eight people for the family breakfast before church, but there would be twenty-one for the gift exchange. Twenty-two if Shay came. Plenty of others for her to hide behind. He probably wouldn’t even have to talk to her if she did come.

“Let’s eat,” Shane said, setting the hot pan on the hot pad on the counter. He glanced around, and Austin did too. Their dad hadn’t come. Disappointment cut through Austin, but he brushed it off. His dad wasn’t going to influence how he felt anymore. He was a grown man, and he’d been invited to the family breakfast. If he chose not to come, that was on him.

Robin said grace, and everyone put eggs, French toast, and sausage on their plates. It was a happy, bubbly atmosphere, and Austin basked in the warmth of it. He loved his family, and he couldn’t think of anywhere he’d rather be in that moment. Sure, he wanted Shay there with him, to show her that there were families that rebuilt after tragedy. That she had a place on this ranch even if she didn’t own it.

After cleaning up, he rode with his mom and Barry into town. Barry was a nice guy—a retired dentist who’d lost all his hair a long time ago. He told stories of his own grown children, and Austin had learned that his wife had died about five years ago.

The way his mother glowed meant she was obviously smitten by Barry, and Austin had to admit he couldn’t find anything to dislike. Contentment spread through him. His mom deserved to be happy, to be cherished, to have someone to spend her life with that wouldn’t ruin her.

Once at the church, they joined the streams of people heading inside. He looked around for Shay but couldn’t see her. There were so many people—and more still coming in—the balcony had been opened. She literally could’ve been right in front of him and Austin wouldn’t have seen her.

He managed to squeeze himself against the wall, turning sideways to make room for everyone else along the row. Pastor Gifford looked like someone had put a light bulb in his mouth and turned him on. He glowed as he spoke about the Savior and His birth, encouraged everyone to take the Christmas spirit with them throughout the year, and ended early so “folks can spend time with their families.”

Austin wanted to take this joyful, peaceful feeling and bottle it up. Drink it every time he felt himself slipping into a bad mood or getting frustrated with someone or something. How can I do that?

“You comin’?”

He glanced up to see Shane waiting for him behind the bench, and Austin scrambled to his feet. “Yeah, comin’.”

“You looked lost there.” Shane pinned him with that parental older brother look Austin didn’t appreciate.

“I’m fine.”

“Why don’t you just go talk to Shay?” They inched toward the exit, the crowd making the escape slow and tedious. “See if she’s coming tonight. Put yourself out of your misery.”

“I could, I guess.” Austin stuffed his hands in his pockets and trained his feet on the floor in front of him. “I just don’t want to…crowd her. You know? She said she needed time.”

“It’s been almost two weeks.”

“I know how long it’s been.” Every day, every hour, every second was agony. A moment passed where Austin couldn’t breathe, and then his involuntary functions fired again.

“Think about it.” Shane separated from him once they went outside, and Austin headed back to his mom’s car alone.

Back at the ranch, his mother put everyone to work hanging up a stocking for every ranch hand and everyone who was coming. This was a Royal family tradition, one she’d done on their ranch growing up. Everyone got gifts on Christmas Eve, even the seasonal worker they’d hired the week before.

Once the stockings were all hung, his mother went around humming holiday hymns as she sifted through her bag of socks to find the right pair for the person. She always gave socks on Christmas Eve, saying everyone always needed a new pair of socks.

Throughout the afternoon, everyone managed to bring their gifts and fill the stockings for the ranch hands. Austin had something for Shay, but he didn’t dare put it in her stocking for everyone to see.

It was too personal, and it would probably make her mad now that they weren’t dating anymore. She didn’t wear much jewelry, and he couldn’t very well give her something so impersonal as a gift card to the Soup Kitchen. He’d seen a few mementoes around her house that testified of her love of the ranch and her love of her parents, and he’d taken the photo of her he’d found and had it professionally framed.

Shay was probably eight in the picture, and her mother’s illness and subsequent death still a decade away. She’d clearly won something, as Austin had noticed a ribbon pinned to her shirt that he hadn’t seen the first time he’d found the photo.

The frame was silver—Shay’s preferred metal color—and adored with flowers along the bottom. A rectangle for engraving was there, and Austin had chosen to put the word FAMILY there.

Family was important to Shay. It was what had driven her from the ranch and brought her back. Austin desperately wanted her to feel like part of the family on this ranch, so with only thirty minutes to go until the gift exchange would start, he put his cowboy hat on and caught his brother’s eye.

“I’ll be back.”

“Good luck,” Shane said, nothing else needed.

Austin stepped out through the back door so he wouldn’t have to pass his mother and answer any questions.

He’d rounded the corner of the house and taken four strides when two German shepherds came into view. They saw him and bounded forward, their master down the road a bit and walking with hesitant steps.

“Shay.” The word breathed out of his mouth, but she lifted her head as if she’d heard him. Of course she couldn’t. She was much too far away for that.

But she’d seen him now, and she’d stopped walking altogether. She wore a pair of jeans and a green blouse the exact shade of Christmas. Her cowgirl hat sat on her head perfectly, and she was wearing her glasses today. He wasn’t sure if that was because her eyes hurt, or she was expecting to cry that day, or something else entirely.

A wet nose touched his hand, and he turned his attention to her dogs. “Hey, Lizzy.” Austin scrubbed one dog’s head and then the next. “Molly. What’ve you guys been doin’, huh?” He gave them a good pat each then looked back at Shay. She carried a bag clearly laden with gifts, and he wondered what she’d have for him.

He stood and strode toward her, suddenly wanting to exchange gifts in private. The picture frame was still at his house—along with his father.

“Hey.” He stopped a few paces from her. “I have something for you at my place. I was just goin’ to get it.” Not really true, but not entirely false either. “I was just going to drop it by, since I wasn’t sure if you were coming this evening or not.”

She looked at him with those beautiful caramel-coffee eyes. “I have something for you at my cabin too. I…I didn’t want to give it to you in front of everyone.”

His heart grew wings and lifted into the air, soaring and flying through the clouds. She had a gift for him. Not only that, but a gift she didn’t want to give him in public.

“Should we maybe do our exchange now? Or do you want to wait until after?”

“Now’s fine.” She looked down at the bag she was carrying. “This is chocolate though. Should I put it in the house so it doesn’t melt?”

Though the temperatures weren’t hitting record highs, the sun was warm today. “Sure,” Austin said, reaching for the bag. “I’ll take it and be right back.”

She relinquished the bag to him, and he hurried to put it in the kitchen, near panic that she’d be gone when he returned. He’d felt like this before, and he hated that he didn’t trust her enough to know she’d be standing in the middle of the road, right where he left her.

It felt natural to reach for her hand, pick up right where they left off almost two weeks ago. To keep himself from doing exactly that, he put his hands in his pockets and added a couple of feet of distance between them as they walked back the way she’d come.

An engine filled the air, and Austin searched for the source of it, finding his father’s truck easily. He slowed to a stop, the window already down. “I’m just going over for the gift exchange.”

“Right,” Austin said. “I left something at my place. We’re going to get it, and then we’ll be right there.”

His father flicked his gaze to Shay and back to Austin. “All right.” He continued down the road, and Austin thought it strange he’d driven. It was probably three or four blocks—a ten-minute walk—and the weather was gorgeous.

“I want to see your new place,” she said when they reached the crossroads. “So let me grab your gift, and I’ll meet you over there. Okay?” She didn’t wait for him to answer before she continued east and he had no choice but to go north.

His house smelled muskier than usual, and he hurried to open a window to air the place out. Shay arrived only a few minutes later, and her timid knock on the front door sent his pulse into palpitations.

He opened the door to find her holding a large sugar cookie in the shape of a heart. It had been decorated with soft pink frosting and it had his name elegantly piped onto the front. The clear cellophane bag had been tied with a red ribbon.

Shay held it up by the top of the bag so that it dangled between them. “I’m giving you my heart.”

Austin’s throat felt so narrow, and his mind so soft. He looked at the cookie and then Shay, searching searching searching for an answer. He didn’t dare hope, and yet that was the dominant emotion cascading through him like river rapids.

“What does—I mean—?”

“I’m in love with you, Austin Royal. And while it terrifies me to no end, I’ve decided I trust you.” She shook the bag slightly. “I spent all morning making this so that it was just right. You better take it—and don’t break it.”

He wasn’t sure if she was literally talking about the heart-shaped cookie, or her actual heart. All he could hear was I’m in love with you, Austin Royal.

He took the cookie, focusing on it until he could think straight. I’m in love with you, Austin Royal.

“Does this mean you want me more than the ranch?”

“I’ve always wanted you more than the ranch,” she said.

He looked up at her, that joy and peace flooding him when he saw how sincere she was. Her hands shook the teensiest bit as she reached for him, and Austin drew her securely into his arms.

“Ah, there you are,” he breathed. “You fit so great right here, close to me.”

“I’ve missed you,” she whispered. “I’m sorry.”

“Nothing to be sorry about.” He drew back, gazed down at her, and smiled. “Okay? Not one thing.”

“I’ll still need time.”

“I won’t break your heart.”

Her smile was a little wobbly, but she nodded.

“I won’t,” he repeated. “Because I’m in love with you too.”