I GIGGLE LIKE I haven’t in years as Tzain spins me round and round. He bends to lift me again but stops, leaving me on the ground. The smile that stretched from ear to ear drops alongside his sweat. I follow his line of sight just in time to see Inan grab Zélie’s face, embracing her with a kiss.
Skies!
A gasp slips from my lips. I sensed that something kindled between them; I just didn’t know it would ignite so soon. But observing the way Inan kisses Zélie now, more questions brew. The tender way he holds her, the way his hands roam, pulling her into him—
My cheeks flush and I turn away; an embrace like this is far too intimate to watch. But Tzain does not share my discomfort. If anything, he stares more. Every muscle in his body tenses; his eyes grow hard, all joy banished.
“Tzain…”
He brushes past me, steeled to attack with a fury I’ve yet to witness.
“Tzain!”
He moves like he cannot see me, like he will not stop until his hands wrap around my brother’s throat.
Then Zélie grabs Inan and pulls his lips to hers.
The sight halts Tzain midstep. He stumbles back, as if physically struck. Then all of a sudden he snaps, breaking in half like a twig between clenched fists.
He stalks past me into the divîner crowd, pushing through the festival into the campgrounds. I struggle to keep pace with his sprint as he rushes into his tent. He bypasses Nailah and Zélie’s pack to grip the handle of his ax—
“Tzain, no!”
My screams fall on deaf ears as he shoves the ax into his pack. Along with his cloak, his food … the rest of his belongings?
“What are you doing?”
Tzain ignores me, forcing his cloak down as if it too kissed his sister. I reach out to touch him, but he rips his shoulder away. “Tzain—”
“What?” he yells, and I flinch. He pauses, releasing a deep sigh. “Sorry, I just—I can’t do this. I’m done.”
“What do you mean ‘done’?”
Tzain wraps the leather straps around his back and pulls them tight. “I’m leaving. You can come with me if you want.”
“Wait, what?”
Tzain doesn’t pause to give me an answer. Before I can say anything else, he blows through the tent flaps, abandoning me for the brisk night.
“Tzain!”
I scramble after him, but he makes no attempt to wait. He storms past the campgrounds, leaving all traces of the festival in his wake. I can hear the faint roar of the Gombe River as he flies through the wild grass. He gets all the way to the next valley before I finally catch up.
“Tzain, please!”
He pauses, but his legs tense like he could take off at any moment.
“Can you just slow down?” I plead. “Just—just breathe! I know you hate Inan, but—”
“I don’t give a damn about Inan. Everyone can do whatever the hell they want, just leave me out of it.”
My chest freezes at the cruelty of his words, shattering all the warmth he put there before. Though my legs shake, I force them forward. “You’re upset. I understand, but—”
“Upset?” Tzain narrows his eyes. “Amari, I’m tired of fighting for my life, I’m tired of paying for everyone’s mistakes. I’m sick of doing everything I can to keep her safe when all she does is throw it away!” He lowers his head, shoulders slumping. For the first time since I’ve met him he appears small; it’s disconcerting to see him this way. “I keep expecting her to grow up, but why would she when I’m always here? Why change when I stand by just waiting to clean up her mess?”
I step closer and grab his hands, lacing my fingers between his coarse ones. “I know their relationship is confusing … but I promise you, deep down my brother’s intentions are pure. Zélie hated Inan more than anyone. If she feels this way about him now, it has to mean something.”
“It means what it always does.” Tzain slides out of my grasp. “Zélie’s doing something stupid, and sooner or later it’s going to blow up in her face. Wait for the explosion if you want, but I’m done.” His voice breaks. “I never wanted to be a part of this anyway.”
Tzain walks away again, cleaving something inside me. This is not the man I know, a man I have started to …
Love?
The word floats in my mind, but I can’t call it that. Love is too strong, too intense for what I feel. For what I am allowed to feel. But even still …
“You never give up on her,” I shout after him. “Never. Not once. Even when she cost you everything, you’re always by her side.”
Like Binta. My friend’s playful smirk appears in my mind, lighting up the cold night. Tzain loves fiercely as she did, without condition—even when he shouldn’t.
“Why now?” I continue. “After everything, why this?”
“Because he destroyed our home!” Tzain whips around. A vein bulges against his neck as he screams. “People drowned. Children died. And for what? That monster’s been trying to kill us for weeks and now she wants to forgive him? Embrace him?” His voice strains and Tzain pauses, slowly clenching and unclenching his fists. “I can protect her from a lot of things, but if she’s going to be this stupid, this reckless—she’s going to get herself killed. I’m not sticking around to watch.”
With that he turns, tightening his pack and walking farther into the darkness.
“Wait,” I call, but this time Tzain does not slow. Each step he takes causes my heart to pound harder against my chest. He’s really doing this.
He’s really leaving.
“Tzain, please—”
A horn sounds, cutting through the night.
We freeze as more join in, silencing the drums of the festival.
I turn and my heart drops as the royal seal that has always haunted me comes into view, gleaming off suit after suit. The eyes of the snow leopanaires seem to flash in the darkness.
Father’s men are here.