‘I trust your flight went without a hitch?’ Greg’s voice is silky smooth at the other end of the phone.
‘Yes, very comfortable, thanks, but you really shouldn’t have spent so much on me, Greg. I would have been very happy to travel economy.’
‘Dearest Cara, I wouldn’t hear of it,’ Greg says in amusement. ‘You must raise your game.’
Cara squirms. Why does she always say the wrong thing with him?
‘No longer are you the unknown hippy artist living in some far-flung corner of the earth,’ Greg continues. ‘You are a prize-winning artist with an image to cultivate and maintain. You must never lose sight of that, Cara. You can’t simply revert to your previously unsophisticated ways as soon as your feet touch the sand.’
‘I was just saying—’
Greg interrupts her. ‘Just saying is not good enough. That’s when you trip up. People constantly judge. It’s what comes out of your mouth and how you present yourself to the world that creates the impression. You must be aware of that, at all times.’
Cara looks out of the living-room window. It’s a blustery day. Surf crashes onto the beach, sending a handful of gulls at the water’s edge into the air to hover precariously on the wind as they search the sands for the next meal the tide may have brought in. Usually this energy invigorates her, but Greg’s stern words leave her feeling flat.
‘Cara,’ he says more softly.
‘Yes,’ she says quietly.
‘Don’t be sullen.’
‘I’m not,’ she says.
‘I’m only sharing wisdom I’ve picked up over the years. With time it will become easy, I assure you. You’ve made great strides already.’
Great strides! Did she have great strides to make? She supposes she must have; she hardly recognises herself now when she’s with him.
‘Cara, please don’t sulk.’
‘I’m not!’ Cara says again. How many times does she have to tell him?
‘I really enjoyed our days together,’ Greg says. ‘I hope you enjoyed them too.’
Cara’s eyes follow a couple walking along the sand. Holding hands, they seem oblivious to the wind. She remembers how she and Oliver used to do that. So in love, nothing burst their bubble; neither the fact that Oliver was ultimately unavailable, nor Sylvie’s tragic death. If anything, that appalling incident cemented their love for each other. But it all seems so very long ago… another lifetime.
‘It was good,’ she says, knowing that if she doesn’t comment he will tell her she has to make her conversation more interesting.
‘Well, I hope good will turn into something a little more exciting,’ he says, the amusement creeping into his voice again. ‘Life here, Cara, will transport you to a different level. Do you recall me saying I would take you to places you hadn’t even dreamed of?’
‘Yes.’ Cara shifts uncomfortably, clearly remembering the occasion. She hadn’t known him long. They were standing in her hallway discussing the Threadneedle Prize, and she instantly felt claustrophobic as she wondered what he was really intimating.
‘You have no idea where I can take you,’ Greg continues, ‘but to fully understand and experience what I mean, you will need to take a chance on me. Are you prepared to do that?’
Cara shifts again. As always with Greg, things are moving too fast. In that smooth, silky way of his, he certainly knows how to pile on the pressure.
‘I will seriously consider your offer,’ she responds.
‘Good girl, Cara. I’ve thought about it long and hard, and I am prepared to make changes in my life to accommodate you and your family.’
Cara frowns. What about the changes she and her family will have to make? He doesn’t seem to have taken those into consideration.
‘Don’t take your time though,’ Greg says with a slight edge to his voice. ‘I want us to be together but I won’t wait forever.’
Cara’s frown deepens. ‘It’s not something I can decide overnight, Greg! I have the well-being of three other people to consider.’
‘I know, Cara,’ says Greg, suddenly tender again, ‘but you can’t blame me for being eager. Hand on heart, I promise I will never let you down.’
‘Well, thank you,’ she says, unsure what else to say.
Two surfers enter the water, their black wetsuits standing out starkly against the white surf. Cara casts her mind back to the summer before Christo died. She spent days on the beach with their young family watching him surf the waves with his friends, blissfully unaware of the growing brain tumour that would ultimately take him from her. They believed life was good; although not financially well off, they wanted for nothing. Life was complete. And then – one fateful day – everything was smashed and destroyed, and nothing has been the same since. Cara turns away from the window.
‘How’s the painting for the Kaplans coming along?’ Greg asks.
‘I’ve made inroads. The canvas is huge. It’s causing quite a stir.’
‘There could be a marketing angle here,’ Greg says thoughtfully. ‘Are you being bold?’
Cara laughs. ‘Hard not to be on that scale!’
‘So, you have no concerns?’
‘Not so far.’
‘Cara, you never fail to astound me!’ Greg says. ‘Your talent knows no self-doubt. Now all you have to do is apply that confidence to your life choices.’
Unable to hold back the sigh, Cara immediately bites her lip.
‘There’s no point in sighing, Cara. You’ve teased me with a taste of what life together would be like. You can’t blame me for being hungry for more.’
‘Greg, please don’t put pressure on me. It’s important I get this right.’
‘Of course,’ he says. ‘Just concentrate on producing the paintings for the exhibition for now. I’m sure you will come to the right decision. But, dearest Cara, remember, there’s not just three other people to consider; you must include me in the mix as well.’
The knot in Cara’s stomach tightens. ‘As I said, I will give it serious thought. That’s all I can promise at this stage. Please don’t think I’m cutting this call short, but I have the school run this afternoon.’
‘Then I will let you go,’ says Greg. ‘Keep me updated with progress on the canvases. Until we speak again.’
‘Bye, Greg.’
‘Make the right decision, Cara. Please.’
Replacing the phone, Cara gazes out of the window again. She doesn’t have to collect Beth and Sky from school; her father is doing that. If she moves to Sag Harbor she will still have a water view, but it will be a very different scene from the one before her now. And she will have to give herself to Greg. There will be no avoiding that…
The current is strong. Having battled through the waves, the two surfers paddle out past Anvil Rock and turn their boards to catch the first wave. With heads down, they pull water hard and paddle their boards as fast as they can. Starting to accelerate down the face of the wave, they effortlessly get to their feet and, maintaining speed, manage to outrun it. Cara watches as they surf into the shallows and catch their breath, laughing at the force of the sea. They have mastered it and are invincible. She knows how that feels, but she will never surf again.
Turning away from the window, she gazes around the empty room. Toby will wake soon and then the children will be home. Life after Christo. She never thought that at age thirty-four she would be raising three children on her own and facing the biggest decision of her life.
Cara shivers.