After Vern signed his confession, his case would be passed along to the DA. Nate had no idea what she was going to do with him, but he hoped she’d give the guy a break. Nate was sure Vern would never get over the torture of what he’d done, and that was a lifelong sentence in itself.

Because Nate never did anything by halves, he stuck around and made sure a few things were set in place before heading home. Vern got to see his daughter’s remains. Nate stuck to the edge of the room while Vern sank to his knees and sobbed. He murmured apologies over and over until Nate could barely stand it.

Seeing the man’s broken mess touched something in Nate’s heart.

He understood the pain.

The loss.

Maybe even the guilt.

He hadn’t killed his mother, but he’d let the culprit free. He hadn’t remembered enough about the car. He hadn’t done enough and so he’d pushed himself through life, determined to make amends for his mistake.

Rather than hiding the way Vern had, he’d acted like a bullet, firing through life with blinders on. Obsessed with catching bad guys and doing good.

But in that moment?

He didn’t feel good.

As he drove Vern back from the hospital to the precinct, he was consumed by every past case he’d closed. Slides ran through his mind—one image after the next—and it struck him with painful clarity that none of them had lessened the pain of losing his mom. None of them had redeemed him or filled the gaping hole.

When they arrived at the station, Nate gently helped the big guy out of the car.

“Do you still want me to talk to that sketch artist?” Vern asked in a wooden voice. The tall man’s aching expression was pitiful.

“Do you think he was a predator?” Nate asked as they walked inside.

Vern’s eyebrows slowly lifted, his eyes filling with tears once more, and Nate understood that Vern needed him to be. He needed this Jamie man to be a criminal too, or the hurt would be unbearable.

Clearing his throat, Nate pulled out his phone. “The fact that he took off and never reported the accident sets off alarm bells in my head. I’ll arrange for a sketch artist to come by tomorrow.”

“Thank you,” Vern croaked.

Nate led him back to the holding cell where the officer on duty would book him and then lock him up for the night. Nate stood in the doorway, watching Vern get photographed. Fingerprints would come next. With a sad sigh, Nate turned away and shuffled out to his bike.

He felt heavy.

Tired.

Depleted.

Slumping onto the seat, he leaned forward and gripped the handlebars. But he didn’t start the engine. All he could do was stare into the black night sky. Emptiness consumed him until it hurt to breathe.

He didn’t know when he started the engine or how he even made it back to his father’s house.

Climbing the porch steps, he let himself in and found his father at the dining table, finishing his dinner alone.

His dad took one look at him and quickly asked, “Tough day?”

Nate leaned against the doorframe. “I just had to arrest a guy who accidentally killed his daughter.”

His father hissed, his face a picture of sympathy. “Not so satisfying, huh?”

Nate shook his head, his throat swelling with an emotion he didn’t understand. “Why do I do this job, Dad?”

His father wiped his mouth with his napkin and sat back in his chair to gaze up at his eldest son. “Because you love it.”

“Do I?”

His father sighed. “Because you’re good at it. You’ve always been driven by justice. It’s what makes you such a great detective.”

Nate gave a thoughtful scowl and went to turn away.

“It doesn’t make you happy, though,” his father said. “Nothing’s made you happy since your mother died…except maybe Sally.”

Nate closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the wall.

“She was nothing but pure sunshine, that girl.” His father rose from the table, his penetrating gaze trying to peel the layers off Nate’s soul.

“She doesn’t want me anymore. I…I wasn’t enough.”

“Well, that’s bullshit,” his father muttered.

Nate’s head jerked up, his eyes popping open in surprise. His father never swore.

The older man let out a hard, barking laugh and took his plate into the kitchen.

Nate could do nothing but follow him. “She dumped me, remember?”

“Yeah, because you weren’t around, not because she didn’t love you anymore. Not because you weren’t enough. You just weren’t there!”

Nate opened his mouth to argue but nothing came out.

“Look, son, I know you’re dedicated to your job. And so does Sally. That’s why she stuck around for so long. But those demons that drive you? They’re hard task masters, and they are stopping you from dealing with the truth.”

Uncomfortable with such a rare, honest conversation with his father, Nate crossed his arms and scoffed. “And what truth is that?”

“That you’re still a scared little boy who’s afraid that if you stop working, someone’s going to slip through the cracks and hurt the people you love.” His father’s voice was soft and steady, yet it felt like he’d just blasted that truth from the rooftop.

Nate’s nostrils flared, his heart hammering an unsteady beat.

His father placed his dirty plate in the sink and turned to face him. “I’m sorry to tell you this, son, but we can’t stop bad things from happening. You can’t fight a natural disaster or stop someone from getting sick. Accidents will happen whether we want them to or not. Now, you’re doing your damn best to keep the people of Aspen Falls safe and I admire that, I really do. But at what cost, Nate? No one’s asked you to give your life for the force. You deserve happiness just as much as the next person.”

Nate looked to the floor, unable to hold his father’s steady gaze.

“Sally was your happiness. You need to get her back.”

“She’s moved on,” Nate muttered bitterly. “She’s with someone else.”

“They married?”

Nate glanced up with an incredulous frown. “No.”

“Huh.” His father looked thoughtful, then turned to start rinsing his plate.

Nate rolled his eyes. “I just told you she doesn’t want me anymore.”

His father laughed again, tipping his head back. “You know, for a man who notices everything, you are one blind fool.”

The laughter grated on Nate’s tattered nerves and he nearly walked out on it.

“Sally Richmond has been in love with you for years. You stole her heart, and as far as I’m concerned, you haven’t given it back. You would be a complete idiot to give up on that girl. Now you stop fighting your demons, Nathan.” He glanced over his shoulder with a sharp look. “Stop wasting your time, and start fighting for the woman you love.” His father slipped his plate into the dishwasher and walked out of the kitchen.

Nate stayed where he was, staring at the wooden floors until the cracks between the boards started to blur.

Very slowly he reached into his pocket and pulled up Sally’s number on his phone. Her beautiful smile stared up at him from the screen and his heart squeezed with desire, affection…happiness.

It was only then that it hit him with a force he couldn’t ignore.

Putting bad guys away would never fill the gaping hole in his chest.

But love would.